May 2021 Moms

Thoughts about our future? (Moving platforms)

I wouldn't typically bring this up now, but since there are so few of us, I figure we can at least start talking about it.  When do we think we want to move platforms? Facebook is the obvious choice, but I'm up for other options if anyone has any suggestions.  

The way we did it in our last bump group:

1. Voted for FB Admins
2. Members would send a private message to one of the FB Admins with their email address and a picture of themselves holding up a piece of paper with assigned word written on it showing their face and their bump.
3. The FB admin would friend them on FB and invite them to the FB group.
4. If a members participation/identity was called into question, the FB admins would discuss.

Thoughts? 
*Loss 8/2014*
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*

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Re: Thoughts about our future? (Moving platforms)

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  • @mrosek91 I think what you just mentioned my actually be what we did, now that I think of it! I think I was thinking about my previous bmb having to be added as a friend, but now I remember just entering emails.  Also, I think you're right about the poll thing on FB, too. I think we did this as well!  I'm glad you have a better memory than I do! lol
    *Loss 8/2014*
    *Rainbow 8/2015*
    *Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
    *Loss of Twin 5/2018*

  • *Loss 8/2014*
    *Rainbow 8/2015*
    *Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
    *Loss of Twin 5/2018*

  • ec1212ec1212 member
    edited January 2021
    I might be the lone holdout here because I loathe FB. I rarely use it...I’m on there 3-4 times a year (usually in Nov and Dec for my birthday messages and holidays). I have been dreading this moment  :(

    I have been trying to think alternatives because I really don’t want to lose you all but I just can’t think of another platform that is as accessible that everyone always uses. I think Slack could be great, but there’s a learning curve there for folks who don’t already use it. I can research other online forums but I’m not on any other message boards so I dont know a lot of software or sites for this rn.

    ETA: I hate FB because I know too much about how they work, since I work in adtech. They can use any and everything I share there for ad targeting despite what I opt out of and they have an abysmal track record for respecting user privacy in general. 
  • I unfortunately don’t really use Facebook much! 😢 many many moons ago when baby bump was first s thing (talking 10 years ago) we did that with a group and my goodness, it ended up being drama GALORE! Lol. I think I am still mentally scarred from that whole situation 🤣
  • @texas_t it might just be that I did it more recently than you. Also, the move to FB was really big for me....
    @ec1212 I actually created a FB account just to move with my previous BMB. I had resisted making an account for over 10 years, and then I couldn't stand the thought of loosing touch with all those woman. After that I became way to addicted to FB, and was really active in that group. It blew up in October when half the group accused the other half of being racist. It was really ugly, and I am now part of a much smaller spin-off group, and no where near as active. It makes me really nervous for our move. But unfortunately it really is just a much easier to use platform, and one that it easy for almost everyone. 
  • @mrosek91 Holy cow, that sounds insane! If it makes you feel any better, I haven't had near that amount of drama in either of my groups, lol!
    *Loss 8/2014*
    *Rainbow 8/2015*
    *Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
    *Loss of Twin 5/2018*

  • Like @ec1212 I’m really not a fan of Facebook for many reasons, but especially because of how they work. I deleted my Facebook account 3 or 4 years ago and don’t regret it. So if you guys do choose to move to Facebook, I won’t be on there. But I understand your want for a not so public platform. 

    I am a big fan of Reddit, and I know you can create private subs on there. But I would have to look it up because I’ve only been active on there for a year or so. I do believe Reddit is a safer place regarding privacy. But I don’t know how many people use it within this group. It’s relatively easy, but I know many people prefer to organize groups through FB. 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


  • @yellingbanana I’d join reddit for this!
  • I'm ok with whatever you guys think works best! I use facebook pretty regularly (not so much for posting, more so just scrolling through my feed). Not super familiar with how reddit works but I would try it out if that's the best option for everyone else. Just anything more user friendly than the bump app please 🤣
  • Since I’m active on FB I am very open to that, however depending on platform chosen I am open for a move off the bump whenever.  

    Regardless of platform I do agree with the suggestions above for verification
  • I'm open to FB. I use it mostly for my other BMB and we are a pretty close group. There is very very little drama. Some of the girls on there even created private FB groups that they only use for our group and I don't think they even use their real full names so maybe that is an option for some of you? I'm more comfortable sharing on a closed private FB group.

    That said, I don't think we moved to FB until the babies started to be born which was a little early for us because we had two 26 weekers.
    Me:29 DH:30
    Married:10/2012
    TTC #1: 12/2017
  • yellingbananayellingbanana member
    edited January 2021
    I’m trying to figure out how to make a private subreddit on Reddit. I managed to create a community, but I think I need to add users before I can make it private. Right now I only have the option of public. 
    If you have a Reddit account, look up May21bumps and join? This is more of a test run to see if I can make it work. 
    And if people don’t want Reddit, no biggie. 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


  • I am much more active in my other BMB group on facebook. I am so bad about getting on the bump more than once a day. I would be open to other easy to use apps as well. 

  • Since becoming a parent I almost solely use Facebook for the private parenting groups 😂 at first it freaked me out and I was always worried my friends could read the comments I post in these groups but eventually trusted it. So I’m fine with Facebook. 

    I agree that the ad targeting is concerning but one way or another the internet is going to figure out I had a baby and begin the onslaught of sleep training etc ads to try to make me feel like shit 🙄🤷🏻‍♀️
  • I know FB is popular. But @mrosek91 just helped out and I created a private subreddit. Reddit is available as an app, it’s pretty easy, not nearly as many ads as FB. You can create a Reddit account, private message me your user name, and I can add you to May21bumps if you want to try it. 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


  • I have not been extremely active here, but would definitely love to join a fb group if I’m allowed. I would be way more active in a fb group. :)

    I am part of a n14 group, that is now on fb, and I don’t know how I would survive without some of these ladies! 


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  • Also, on another note, in my past experience, about a month before babies are born is amazing for moving. Sometimes the transition to figure out who is who is hard, but for me, once the babies come I can relate “xyz is so and so mom and (bump name)” . It’s WAY harder to move after the babies are born 😂😂
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  • ec1212ec1212 member
    edited January 2021
    I’ll set up on Reddit and send a request in a bit here!! Even if I did join a FB group, I would only log in on desktop cause I don’t have the app on my phone, and no one would be able to PM me because I refuse to use Messenger. Hoping Reddit can work!

    Ppl are a bit up in arms today over the news that Facebook is now forcing WhatsApp users to comply with the same privacy terms as the rest of the FB family of apps (https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2021/01/whatsapp-users-must-share-their-data-with-facebook-or-stop-using-the-app/). So there’s a mass migration of group chats from WhatsApp to Signal. 

    If people were into a group chat vs a group, Signal could be a good option and the app is totally secure and ad/privacy-issue free. https://twitter.com/signalapp/status/1347309781564813312?s=21
  • This is my first time, and I can see how transitioning platforms just before babies start arriving makes sense because I’ll be less interested in the daily facts and other things the bump app provides. I would happily join a group on either FB or Reddit. I do worry I’d become less open on FB because I share similar privacy concerns as others, and currently on FB I’m more of a lurker in groups than anything else because of that. But I do know I want to stay in touch with you all as we continue our journeys, so I’ll do whatever feels best for the group! 
  • ec1212ec1212 member
    edited January 2021
    I’m in the Reddit!! And I used my real face since the group is private! Woohoo!! 

    Super easy to sign up. I’ll play around with navigation tomorrow but posting seems pretty easy so far. Feeling hopeful about this. 
  • Liz101015Liz101015 member
    edited January 2021
    I am okay with facebook. 8 am unfamiliar with reddit but this past years have learned many new education platforms so learning a new social one shouldn't be too hard. After the bumps glitchy ness last week I am over this app.
  • yellingbananayellingbanana member
    edited January 2021
    @mkc3888 that’s the group! If you private message me your username through The Bump, I’ll add you on. 

    Other (public) subreddits that I love:
    teaching
    nanny
    specialed
    parentinginbulk
    mommit
    awww
    campingandhiking
    coronavirusUS
    coronavirusWA
    Biology 
    dataisbeautiful
    Education 
    gardening
    lifeprotips
    Lifehacks
    Science

    and more!!! 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


  • I am Brynn1714 if someone can invite me to group on reddit ☺️
  • I’m good to move whenever honestly. I think last time we moved over right before or right after babies started being born. I prefer facebook because I already use it for my J18 mom group and have become Facebook friends with most of the moms there and it’s been a great way to keep up with each other. I wouldn’t be opposed
    to Reddit, I just don’t like the format as much. 
  • I say let’s not transition until after the babies are born.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


  • I'm for either FB or Reddit, although I know nothing about redditt and trying to add another app on my phone will take me forever to find space. 

    I have never heard of Signal, but if its like Telegram its one more app I don't have space for on my phone. As much as I like Whatsapp, these app styles don't really seem to be as flexible with threads as Facebook and I assume Reddit. 

    As to moving, I've gotten used to how this site works, so joining the Reddit now for fun and moving in April/May sounds like a good idea. But it will definitely take me a while to get over to the reddit, I'm not in a rush and a little overwhelmed by social media right now. 

  • mkc3888mkc3888 member
    edited January 2021
    How do you change your name on Reddit because I know it didn’t create the name I have I assume it was assigned when I created my account?  
    @yellingbanana I sent you a message with my name on Reddit. I changed my display name to the same as here. 

    TTC #1 since August 2015
    BFP #1 January 28, 2016
    EDD October 3, 2016
    Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
    My Chart
    TTC #2 Since August 2020
    BFP #2 September 11, 2020
    EDD May 23, 2021





  • So my initial reaction to reddit is that it might work, but I miss the ability to react to things. I'll continue to poke around other subs and see if I can get used to the format.

    As for timing, where ever we end up moving, I think after the babies come is pretty late. It does take time to remember who is who, and connect real names to FB names, and that would probably be hard when also in the newborn fog.

    For those who say they have facebook but don't really use it. I use the desktop and the mobile site (not the app) and there is a way to bookmark a group, so you can go straight to that group, and skip your main feed... If that's something that may make FB more attractive.
  • @mrosek91 I think of upvotes as love its

    TTC #1 since August 2015
    BFP #1 January 28, 2016
    EDD October 3, 2016
    Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
    My Chart
    TTC #2 Since August 2020
    BFP #2 September 11, 2020
    EDD May 23, 2021





  • @texas_t I agree with that. I feel like on Facebook I share a bit more and people seeing me for 1+ years on Facebook is what made me comfortable enough to to meet irl and share my phone number etc. the more anonymous I likely won’t get there. At least not as quickly. 

    TTC #1 since August 2015
    BFP #1 January 28, 2016
    EDD October 3, 2016
    Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
    My Chart
    TTC #2 Since August 2020
    BFP #2 September 11, 2020
    EDD May 23, 2021





  • I should also add that I was one of the last ones to make the move to Facebook because I was hesitant to share so much about myself with “strangers”

    TTC #1 since August 2015
    BFP #1 January 28, 2016
    EDD October 3, 2016
    Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
    My Chart
    TTC #2 Since August 2020
    BFP #2 September 11, 2020
    EDD May 23, 2021





  • @mkc3888 I met my now husband online in 2005, one can say I may be too comfortable with strangers  :D
    *Loss 8/2014*
    *Rainbow 8/2015*
    *Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
    *Loss of Twin 5/2018*

  • I totally get the Facebook thing. I have just recently moved away from social media because I’m not comfortable with, agree or support the invasion of privacy. Not just ads, but access to camera... etc. instagrams new privacy policy, eek! I know they’ve been doing it for awhile they are just actually saying what they are doing now. But I won’t get behind it 🤷🏼‍♀️ I guess I’m a weirdo lol. 
  • @texas_t those are my feelings, too. I mean, if the consensus is Reddit then I'll make the move but Facebook just feels so much more personal which is what I like about it for the purpose of this group. 
  • @gusgus14
    I 100% agree

    TTC #1 since August 2015
    BFP #1 January 28, 2016
    EDD October 3, 2016
    Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
    My Chart
    TTC #2 Since August 2020
    BFP #2 September 11, 2020
    EDD May 23, 2021





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