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April 2021 Moms
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Birth Plans

theblondebumptheblondebump member
in April 2021 Moms
Would love to hear about what the STM+ moms have included in their birth plans in the past. I've seen templates and examples on sites like What to Expect just from googling, but would like to hear your thoughts on what's important to include, why you made decisions you did, and the logistics like who did you give your birth plan to and when? If anyone is willing to share their actual birth plan, I'd love to see them! 

Here are some easy questions to get started, but feel free to include any details/advice in your response!

What are some pre-birth requests you included:
What are labor/delivery requests you included:
What are newborn care requests you included: 


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Re: Birth Plans

  • SerenamarrSerenamarr member
    I used the template from earth mama organics as a starting point both times. It’s so thorough that even if I didn’t end up including some of the things listed in my final birth plan, it brought up so many things id never even thought of and was glad (especially the first time) to become familiar with prior to birth. 

    I made two versions, one a little longer and including desires for handling the end of pregnancy care, which I brought and discussed with my midwife at around 35w. The other one shorter and just the really important labor and neonatal stuff which I gave to the nurse and attending midwife. The purpose of the first one was to facilitate discussion and make sure all potential issues and scenarios were considered, the purpose of the second was just Incase I or DH wasn’t able to answer any questions they’d know our positions. 


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  • juliebird6juliebird6 member
    I found that a lot of the things I wanted were basic standard of care at the hospital where I delivered. I didn’t write anything out but did talk through what I hoped for with my husband, doula, mom (all 3 were in the room
    for my first), as well as each doctor I saw toward the end of my regular appointments while pregnant. I definitely think it’s good to read through the templates and be able to articulate what you want (both you and your partner), but a lot of those things will likely be checked off if/when you do a hospital tour.
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  • kadeephdkadeephd member
    edited January 2021
    I didn't have a birth plan written out last time and don't plan to this time.  I had a general hope to avoid an epidural/interventions, but I wound up wanting an epidural (it was amazing) and getting pitocin.  I will remain flexible with this one too, but the one thing I'll make sure I bring up is skin-to-skin right after birth.  I don't think I did that with my son (it's all so blurry and hard to remember) and I'd like to make sure it happens with this baby.

    Pregnancy Ticker
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  • rexnierexnie member
    edited January 2021
    Same to posters above, who said most things I wanted were standard of care - my hospital is baby friendly (room in), no baths during entire hospital stay after birth, no circumcision in the hospital, immediate skin to skin (even after cesarean), delayed cord clamping, all baby procedures done bedside unless it's an emergency, portable monitoring available, birthing tools available (peanut ball, exercise ball, squat bar).
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  • eahayeseahayes member
    I honestly just wanted an epidural- my son came so quickly (and 3ish weeks early) that I almost didn't get it but so thankful I did! Same with this one- especially with COVID numbers being so high I know there's so much out of my control but I would realllllly like an epidural again
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  • emeraldisle17emeraldisle17 member
    I had no idea that some moms bring templatized birth plans to the hospital...! 

    Echoing what others have said - my birth plan was to be open minded and do what was best for the safe delivery of the baby. There is no way to predict exactly how your birth story is going to go, so be careful about setting hard and fast rules upfront.  I knew i was open to the epidural, and i wanted to do skin to skin immediately after the birth (if it was safe to do so).  My OB and delivering nurse gave her to me right away, so I think that must be standard of care.  And my OB offered me the epidural early on and i took it, and have no regrets - didn't feel a thing and labored under 24 hours after being induced from 0cm! 

    One thing that is helpful to align with your partner on is whether or not he/she wants to cut the cord. They witness so much during delivery that they can be frozen deer-in-headlights when the time comes.  DH knew it was something he wanted to do, so he was ready when the OB asked him. 

    Also there was a thread about this earlier on, but if you are delivering at a larger hospital with residents and students they often welcome them into the room at varying times.  If you ever feel uncomfortable with it, just say so and they should respect your wishes. 

    Be open and flexible, be vocal, and be aligned with your partner most of all - he/she will need to do the talking if you can't!
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  • forevertiredforevertired member
    I didn’t write anything out but thought about it in advance and when I got to the hospital they asked me what I wanted. It was all pretty standard stuff I was looking for, with the understanding that it’s all a shit show and when it comes down to it I just wanted a healthy baby end of the day. My hopes were: epidural, skin to skin/golden hour which was standard, slightly delayed cord clamping, DH cut the cord, DH skin to skin after, and that’s all I remember specifically. Everything was pretty much standard. 
    I will say I thought I would’ve wanted to keep him in the room 24/7 but after my rough labor and him continually choking, I couldn’t sleep if he was around. I sent him to the nursery and it was the best thing I could do for either of us. I was so delirious. They’d bring him in when he woke to eat and I kept telling them I wasn’t hungry, and they’d tell me “no, your baby” and I’d ask “what baby?”.
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  • aisukurimsarangaisukurimsarang member
    The fourth time around, I've learned one thing about having a baby... Just roll with it. Of course, advocate for yourself, yadda yadda yadda... But so many women get hyper focused on their birth plans, that when it doesn't go according to plan, and it never does, they meltdown. So, just make rule #1 BE FLEXIBLE 
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  • kadeephdkadeephd member
    @forevertired We are 100% utilizing sending the baby to the nursery this time if that is an option.  They did not tell me I could do that last time and I got almost no sleep at the hospital.  That lack of sleep continued at home and I just never recovered from it and wound up with PPD.  I'm not saying things would have gone differently necessarily, but this time I will be prioritizing my own sleep.  That includes using the hospital nursery and introducing formula early on if baby seems hungry. 

    Pregnancy Ticker
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  • juliebird6juliebird6 member
    @forevertired @kadeephd +1 for sending the baby to the nursery if possible. I didn't know it was an option with my first (and not sure I would have taken advantage even if I had known) but with my second, I was in really bad shape after the emergency CS and absolutely needed to rest. When they offered to take him for a little bit, it was the best thing that could have happened. 
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  • kadeephdkadeephd member
    edited January 2021
    @forevertired @juliebird6   It's so important for new moms to get rest, but there is a ton of pressure (especially in "baby friendly" hospitals) to promote breastfeeding/bonding that I don't feel the recovery of mothers is much of a priority.  I spent much of the first six months of my son's life feeling like I wasn't doing enough, or doing things the right way, even though I was bending over backwards to try to nurse.  When I was meeting with my OB to get prescribed medication for PPD she had to remind me that I am a person too, and I matter.   It's easy to lose sight of your own needs.

    Pregnancy Ticker
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  • forevertiredforevertired member
    Yes to all of that! ^ The saying “when mom ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy” starts at the beginning. I look back and wonder how things could’ve been different had I been treated for my ppd. I didn’t push it because I was afraid of meds and not being able to breastfeed anymore, but man what a different mom and wife I could’ve been if I had taken care of myself too. 
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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    thanks everyone! Great to hear all of the insight from women who’ve done it before :)

    I totally hear you all on the flexibility which is my general outlook for things that could potentially be out of my control (I.e, I would like to push as long as it’s safe for my baby before having a c section) but I like the idea of having all of my preferences written down so it’s extremely clear that 1, I absolutely want an epidural 2, my baby should not be given formula under any circumstances, 3, I do not want any students in my room and I do not want any residents performing any procedures on me unless it’s an emergency and necessary, all procedures should be performed by doctors. I feel like those are hard and fast rules that are not difficult for the hospital to follow, they just have to aware that those are my preferences. 
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  • aisukurimsarangaisukurimsarang member
    @theblondebump, I grew up going to a training hospital, so students IN the room don't bother me. But, I had a new student telling me things like, lie still so I can put this IV in and if you don't sign here, your baby won't be born while I was in transitional labor. The staff OB was so fed up, she shoved him out of the way. So, yeah... No trainees or med students touching me, tyvm. 
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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    @aisukurimsarang yeah, too many of my friends have had bad experiences with students. I actually changed ob practices earlier in my pregnancy solely based on my preference to not have students participate (my first ob office said they couldn’t really guarantee that, my new practice was totally fine with it). Also, especially with covid right now, I don’t really want any extra people in the room that don’t need to be there. 
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  • rexnierexnie member
    Unrelated question, but do any of your hospitals currently have nurseries with COVID? I thought most/all temporarily closed in the US closed for safety.
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  • bluey101321bluey101321 member
    @rexnie The two I have the choice of delivering at and from what I hear of other local hospitals in my area, no nursery option. I’m in Cali, and our cases are really high though, so I don’t know if it’s just a “here” thing. 
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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    @rexnie No nursery option here at our hospital right now because of COVID (in PA).
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  • aisukurimsarangaisukurimsarang member
    @rexnie no option here. Even before COVID-19 the policy was no nursery unless mom has severe complications. They even do the exam in front of you. 
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  • bbrahmbhattbbrahmbhatt member
    @rexnie no nursery option at our hospital unless the mother has severe complications. This was the case even before COVID though. 
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