Midwife or OB: What did you choose and why?

bmo88 · December 2020

Greetings all!

Curious which route you are going and why. I used an OB the first time because my insurance didn't cover midwives, but I did have a doula.

This time, I want to consider using our stand alone birthing center (not a hospital). So would have to use a midwife. I love the idea of the birth center since they offer water births and other similar to home birth options, but with medical staff present.

Would love hear experiences of those who have gone the midwife or birth center route as well.

jynjer4 · December 2020

I don’t have birth center experience but I’ve used a CNM (certified nurse midwife) and had home water births with both of my kids. I couldn’t have asked for a better experience both times so I’m doing the same thing again! Especially with the whole Covid thing... I’ve never had a hospital birth either so I have nothing to compare to really besides my sisters’ experiences but I’d happily give birth twice in a row at home rather than have the regular hospital births my middle sis had. She’s pregnant again ( 3 mo ahead of me) and after being at my births she’s planning to have this one at home with a midwife. My youngest sis used a midwife at an Amish birth center this last summer and she really liked it besides the fact that she had to labor with a mask! My best advice if you go the midwife route is to “shop around” and find one who you connect with. (The ones around here offer free consultations so you can figure out if you like them for free!) If you change your mind about the provider you choose in the middle of your pregnancy though there’s absolutely nothing wrong with switching!

Panaceia · December 2020

I didn't have a midwife or ob with my first and there were serious issues with the birth so second time around I chose OB and had a RCS. I'll be doing the same this time since I'm 41 and considered high risk but I would have loved to try a midwife!

bmo88 · December 2020

@jynjer3 water birth intrigues me because I was able to labor at home in my tub for 3 hours and I could handle the contractions really well in the water. Then, when I got out and had to to the hospital, it was harder to manage the pain.

The only potential concern I have is...the thought of being in the water with the after birth. I know its natural...but not going to lie, thought kind of grosses me out. Was that an issue or concern?

dancingnarwhal · December 2020

I chose a midwife. My hospital offers both and my insurance covers both. The OBs are there if we need one. But if it’s just a normal pregnancy and delivery I’m more comfortable with a midwife as the midwifery model of care is more in-line with my own perspective on pregnancy and the type of care I would like to receive.

My Sister-in-law had my niece and is having her twins at a stand alone birthing center and had an OB both times though so you may want to look into that further if you would be more comfortable with an OB.

surrenderdorothy · December 2020

I’m going the midwife route. My hospital has a birthing center in the same floor as L&D that has a giant walk in shower, birthing tub, and area to walk, use the ball, etc. Unfortunately I could not use the birthing center with my son’s birth because I had to even induced but I hope to use it this time. I personally don’t feel comfortable with anything but a birth at a hospital so this is the perfect marriage of having a more holistic approach to birth and having all the equipment and personnel if there was an emergency.

Edit to add- I still received care form my midwife even though I was on the L&D floor. I just couldn’t use the birth center facilities. That was a huge bummer for me.

jynjer4 · December 2020

@bmo88 Not an issue at all! You get out of the water and into bed before you deliver the placenta. My water broke in the pool with both kids and I didn’t notice any weird floaties from that either.

grogu · December 2020

@bmo88 I feel like birthing is kinda gross regardless of what you do 😅

I'm going with a Doctor. We just have GP's where I am unless you need a CS. I'm hoping to get a GO out of it otherwise I'd go with a midwife.
My hospital just went to a care team where you could end up with 1 of 7 doctors or midwives the day you give birth. Last time around it was my dr no matter what so I am not sure how I feel about it yet

bmo88 · December 2020

@baby_yoda1986 that's true, there is a fair amount of grossness with birth 🤣

My OBs office was that way when I delivered. My OB actually told me she would be there for delivery up until 5 days before...she decided to go on a vacation. So I ended up with a random doc I had never met prior.

claireloSC · December 2020

I gave birth at a birthing center that also had a full surgical suite and staff in case of emergency. No NICU but there was one a block down the street. They had O.B.s and C.N.M. You would get whomever was available when you gave birth. So I had an O.B. for all my appointments. When I got there I had a C.N.M. but got an O.B. when things went to shit. I would do it again but there is nothing like that here. So will be using a hospital due to the complications I had last time. I gave birth in a very hippie town and the birth culture there was pretty hands off - there were lots of home births, doulas, also a kind of free-birth center with no doctors? So because of that, I felt like they were slow to give interventions they should have given me. For example it took them several days to give me a blood transfusion after losing several pints of blood at delivery. So I don't think that's a birth center thing, more the culture there. I had a doula as well, which my O.B. pretty much made me do. Since every woman in my family had a c-section she felt that was the best way to prevent one. The doula was nice, and helpful during pushing, but I wouldn't hire one again. Maybe for the postpartum period, she helped me feel more normal and gave me tips on how to heal from everything that happened, so I could see that.

surrenderdorothy · December 2020

@claireloSC would you mind sharing why you wouldn’t do a doula for the birth?

I only ask because I didn’t have one with my first and I really think it would have helped me. My husband is wonderful but not a great advocate when he is stressed. I missed having someone that could do that for me while I was laboring. I’m deciding if we want to go that route this time around.

jaxalia · December 2020

Im curious as well! Since it will be our first time we're exploring all of our options and I'd love to know why you'd pass this time round. I definitely have also been exploring a post partum doula, so would love to hear anyone's experience there!

bmo88 · December 2020

@jaxalia we will not hire a doula this time around. I think ours was helpful but mostly because we had no clue what we were doing. This time around, my DH and I feel confident in the labor process and won't be going the doula route.

surrenderdorothy · December 2020

@bmo88 that is a good point. Thanks for sharing. 🙂

jaxalia · December 2020

@bmo88 that makes a lot of sense. Thank you for sharing!

claireloSC · December 2020

Yeah, I agree with that, I know what I'm doing. But honestly besides holding me leg during pushing, I just didn't think it was that helpful. Your body will do what it does and it felt a little strange to have some else there. She didn't really do anything that helped with pain or anything, and the nurses are there the whole time helping too and IMO help more. She gave me a massage which was nice but most of the time we just had to wait for me to progress (30 hr labor). It was a lot of money at the time for us, and though I could more easily afford it now I just would rather spend my money elsewhere. Not to mention, there's no way they would let me have 2 support people in the hospital unless Covid is under control. DW won't be allowed to any appointments either as things stand now. If you attend a birthing class (which are often taught by doulas) you will get the main benefits of their knowledge without being out of your mind with pain like you would during labor. I guess I feel like you and your body have to get through birth, there's not much a doula can do to help with that.

bmo88 · December 2020

@claireloSC sorry that was your experience. I think it completely depends on the doula and situation.

I will say, our doula did help prevent me from getting a c-section. The attending OB (not my usual) was nearing the end of his shift and was pushing for a c-section since I had been pushing for a while without success. I didn't want that. My doula advocated for a change in physical position and to give me another 30 minutes since baby was still safe.

That made a huge difference and got me to delivering vaginally.

jynjer4 · December 2020

I had a doula with my first but not with my 2nd and I won’t this time either. Honestly I felt like it was a big waste of $$ for me since I had a home birth and my mom and sister were both there. I wasn’t ever in the position of needing someone to advocate for me either. If I was planning a hospital birth though I would 100% hire one!

MrsPyrowiz · December 2020

I've used hospitalist CNMs for all of my births. My oldest, my labor was super traumatic. I switched to a different midwife team and hospital with my second and third and it was AMAZING. Both of those births were 100% unmedicated, healing, and just all around awesome. We're planning to use the same team this time around too.

mrspants0809 · December 2020

I will be using a MFM/high risk OB. In his practice he has a lot of midwives that work with him and they will be helping with the delivery but I have to have a hospital birth because I have a clotting disorder and am on blood thinners.

Clobert · December 2020

I’m going to have midwives at a birth center for my 3rd birth. I had CNMs at a hospital the first time (and a doula, which I’m glad I had because I was in labor for 56 hours and went through a lot of decisions and exhaustion and it was very nice to have someone supporting me and my husband through that).
the second time I went to the birth center and had a really wonderful experience. It’s free standing but across the street from a hospital with NICU. We’ll be going back there and I’m kind of excited to experience that again.

gingermama29 · December 2020

I have CNM but I've been seeing the on-site OB for help getting pregnant for the last several months. I'm honestly not sure who I will continue to see throughout the pregnancy. I love my midwives - they delivered DD in the hospital.

Midwife or OB: What did you choose and why?

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