Sharing the news with your SO

mrs_massie · October 2020

How did everyone tell their SO that they got a BFP?

I generally try to be creative and original with stuff, but telling my husband I'm pregnant in a fun way is not my strong suit. This time I put on a shirt that said MOM^3 and walked around the house until he noticed. We generally get pregnant very easily, so it's usually not a big surprise when I tell him I'm pregnant, so he looked at the shirt after a few minutes and said "Mom to 3, your pregnant, I'm not surprised."

Tell me your stories...

inthewoods23 · October 2020

@mrs_massie normally I'm super salty about the "blinks and get pregnant" types (aka my cousin and his wife), but I picture that said so nonchalantly and it makes me laugh

AFM, I had a gift box with a couple onesies and a pair of baby slippers that I would give him. Sat in my closet for 3 years... but hey I used it! I had tested with a FRER right before lunch, had the shock of my life, grabbed the box from my closet, put the test in there, and put it on the table for him to open when we ate. I walked back downstairs to my desk (we're WFH in the same room right now) and of course he picked up on my sniffling that I couldn't control because I did not expect us to get pregnant naturally. Took him upstairs to open the box and he's like "a negative test?". I had to shine the lamp light for him to see it. It wasn't THAT faint.

So yeah, he didn't react like I thought he would, but he's excited (just doesn't show it).

jaztastic · October 2020

*cue anecdote* I always get a little sad about stuff like this. I really feel like this another one of those things that IF robs you of. When you go through fertility treatments especially IUI or IVF (IVF for me) there really isnt a cute way to give the news because you are both already waiting out every day until a positive pops up on the stick. Its such a process with all the meds and injections and honestly you get over it quick. Andplusalso Ive never made it all the way through my 2ww without testing at home. I needed to brace myself for the news whether good or bad.

But Im here for all the wonderful stories.

inthewoods23 · October 2020

@jaztastic agreed. It's really not exciting to know the date you will for sure find out. Plus with going through IF and the hardship that is, I don't think I know a single person that would not immediately tell their SO when they finally get that positive because you work so hard for it. I used to watch some couple's youtube channels and they ALL would sit together for the phone call with the news.

ellieemc26 · October 2020

@jaztastic agreed on the IF front. My SO was just texting me all morning asking if the nurse had called yet after my first beta, not much romantic or fun about that! To make up for it I'm trying to come up with cute ways to tell my parents

But, yes, everyone else bring on the fun stories!

mindyb2019 · October 2020

Well, this is my 3rd pregnancy as the other 2 were losses, so each time gets less and less creative because of fear. The very first pregnancy i had, i found this cute onesie that said "sleepless nights coming soon" on it and put it in a wooden box with the digital preg test and wrapped it in wrapping paper and gave it to him as a gift. The second pregnancy I made cards with little clues on them to do a scavenger hunt around the house and let to the back door where there was a little gift box wrapped up with a preg test inside of it. This 3rd pregnancy, i just wrote " Here we go again" on a post it note and handed it to him and he knew exactly what it meant and looked at me and said really? you serious? then I showed him the digital preg test. Im hoping I wont have to do a fourth time. FX!

jaztastic · October 2020

@ellieemc26 oh yea Ive enjoyed the little ways we've told the parents. Currently thinking this years announcement to my parents will be around Halloween/Halloween themed.

jaztastic · October 2020

@mindyb2019 love tit for support. Its hard to navigate a pregnancy after loss(es).

mrs_massie · October 2020

inthewoods23 said:

@mrs_massie normally I'm super salty about the "blinks and get pregnant" types (aka my cousin and his wife), but I picture that said so nonchalantly and it makes me laugh

I'm so sorry! I did not mean to be insensitive to anyone. I know we have been fortunate, but though we don't have too much trouble, I have also experienced two losses, so it's not all perfect over here.

mrs_massie · October 2020

@jaztastic every story is great no matter how you find out. I imagine finally seeing two lines, no matter the means, is a great story to tell.

mrs_massie · October 2020

ellieemc26 said:

@jaztastic agreed on the IF front. My SO was just texting me all morning asking if the nurse had called yet after my first beta, not much romantic or fun about that! To make up for it I'm trying to come up with cute ways to tell my parents

But, yes, everyone else bring on the fun stories!

You guys...I still love hearing these stories about the calls waiting to find out. I can't imagine the feeling of anticipation and then hearing those words! I think I'd burst.

mrs_massie · October 2020

@mindyb2019 I can relate to this! Our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage too, so I feel like it kinda stole from the excitement of another announcement after that. I had another miscarriage right before this pregnancy too, so I really didn't know how to tell him again.

inthewoods23 · October 2020

@mrs_massie No worries. We're all pregnant here. Being pregnant now I'm not salty about it, but it's so easy to feel that way when you're TTC and everyone around you is getting PG but you (yay IF brains). Easy can mean so many different things in the context of TTC, you know? Like easy could be that you have sex often enough that you've never had to track your cycles to get KU, or it could be that you get KU withing 4-5 months with tracking. Andplusalso, some people are just super fertile! Except I think in the medical sense it means your uterus accepts any embryo, even if it has abnormalities and not that you get PG quickly when you're trying.

klj0228 · October 2020

We were NTNP but because of other factors knew it was a long shot to actually get ku that way for us. We had been at my parents all weekend without my period showing up so I knew I would try to test when we got home. Got home and I had zero tests in our house, but didn’t want to tell my H what I was thinking until I knew for sure. The next morning I took DD to daycare and stopped at the pharmacy for some tests on the way home. We had both taken off that day so he was still sleeping when I got home. Peed on the stick and it was an instant positive. When he did get up that morning he went straight outside to do some work in the yard.

When he came in for lunch I was like, “I need to tell you something, but I am really nervous about it.” So he just says, “okay?” “You know we weren’t really trying but not preventing and didn’t think it would work, well apparently it did. Took a test this morning and I’m pregnant.” His response “and?” 😂. “Nothing, that is all. I am pregnant”

With our first I was so excited that I made it fun. I bought some liquor and beer and made a cute sign telling him he had a Designated driver for the next 9 Months.

For the record, I am excited about baby #2 just a little overwhelmed with our chaotic life and hormones and it being kind of a surprise.

inthewoods23 · October 2020

@klj0228 why are guys so weird about this news? haha

mindyb2019 · October 2020

@klj0228 I love your husband's response.. and??? 😆 nothing that is all haha

Maggie1202 · October 2020

Lol @klj0228 that’s such a typical dude response! 😂

No special story here. I just showed my husband the positive test when he finished his workout the morning I found out. He said “you’re lying!” And I started to cry. We tried for 2.5 years with NOTHING, then took a break for about 2 years before starting to try again so I think we were both shocked that it actually happened for us.

JournoGrl23 · October 2020

I had all these creative ideas, but they went out the window every time. First time I peed on a stick while he showered and when it came back positive I said “uh... I think I’m pregnant.” Unfortunately, we lost that one. By the second one we had been through the loss, another chemical and months of trying, so when I saw the second line I called my husband and shouted “I’m pregnant!!!!!” He said “OK” and hung up. He was so shocked he didn’t know what else to do. With my second I got pregnant while breastfeeding the first and it was very much wanted, but unexpected. I shouted it in excitement at him then too the moment I found out. This time I got a faint positive and came down stairs to get the kids ready for the day. He looked at me and said, “You’re pregnant aren’t you? You have that face.” I can’t keep that secret for even 2 seconds around him.

Parents, however, we’ve always done cute things. This time we hung a positive pregnancy test in between the photos we have of our girls on the living room wall and took a picture. We sent it to the parents and waited on their responses. We told them all the day we found out because neither of us can keep it a secret. They were all there for me for my loss, so I always like to tell them right away.

sgrn18 · October 2020

With my first 2 pregnancies I literally just showed MH the tests. This one, I had to wait a whole week to tell my husband because I was traveling for work. I didn’t want to tell him over the phone. Just doesn’t feel like over the phone news lol. I wasn’t too creative just bought DS a big brother tshirt and some cute little newborn baby pjs. I got home and they weren’t home so I just laid them on the table with a sandwich bag of approx 742 pregnancy tests making sure the digital one was on on top lol

With my sister and I so close in due dates we will probably tell my parents together but I’ll be waiting til about thanksgiving for that. Well probably tell My in laws around the same time if MH doesn’t spill the beans earlier.

ellieemc26 · October 2020

@mrs_massie I pretty much did burst when they told me! I'd been preparing myself all morning to hear bad news, 4 hours worth in between my blood draw and the call. When she told me I immediately starting crying and couldn't catch my breath! I guess my response is probably what I would have wanted from my SO, but I think he was too worried about how I was going react if it wasn't a good outcome to even be excited and was just more relieved that I was okay.

@JournoGrl23 I love the pic to everyone idea! I've been trying to come up with how we would tell three separate families (my parents are divorced), that's a great way to let them know all the same way at the same time!

pickle-chips · October 2020

With our first, I took a test at work on my lunch break. When MH got home I was grinning like a total weirdo and just blurted it out and then he responded by yelling “baby!” while pumping both fists in the air. BB2 I don’t even remember, but it definitely wasn’t something cute.

This time I called it out to him across the room over our screaming children who were both having very strong feelings about the breakfast they were given.

I’m too anxious to pull off anything creative. I get really jittery and just want to share the news as quickly as possible to take the pressure off.

JournoGrl23 · October 2020

@ellieemc26 we had three separate families to tell too, as my husband’s parents are divorced. It worked really well and they all loved it!

ramzlau · October 2020

I tested in the morning before he was awake, pulled out the Winnie the Pooh plush and coffee cup that I have had stashed for almost a year and set it up with a note that said We did it! on the kitchen table for him to see when he came in to get his coffee. I got his reaction on video. It was priceless because he was shocked. It was our 5th IUI, so lots of waiting and negative tests.

I told him with our first THB in the same way only it was Kermit, and I have a video of it too. Ironically the two MC we have had were surprises and I didn’t have anything special stashed away for them. So hoping that means good vibes for this pregnancy!

We already told our moms because my MIL lives with us. We had DD wear a shirt that said I have a surprise...I am going to be a Big Sister. We FaceTimed with my mom to show her.

fitz1989 · October 2020

I live all the stories! So cute! I can’t wait to hear all the announcement stories!

i bought a funny dad book right when we decided to start TTC. I testing in the AM after DH went to work. I think I knew prior to him getting out of our development! 😂 he had a big day planned and was supposed to be home around 2pm. But he texted saying he was going to be a lot later. He didn’t come up until 7pm. I was a ball of nerves all day!

I knew he would want to shower when he got home so I waited and surprise him coming out of the bathroom with the book and my tests. I very squeakily said ‘we’re pregnant.’ He grabbed the non digital test and said ‘no really?!?! I don’t know how to read this!’ I showed him the digit and he was like oh, that’s clear enough! Haha!

mrs_massie · October 2020

@fitz1989 I got my husband a book during my first pregnancy. We werent really trying at the time and it was a surprise pregnancy, so he was freaking out a bit. I think the book was called "She's having a baby, your having a breakdown" Well, when that pregnancy ended in MC a few weeks later, we put the book away. When I got pregnant again, I took a test when I got home from work and he was on his way home. I couldnt wait to tell him so I called him and said, Hey do you still have that book...

kaw726 · October 2020

With my first I had bought a “Big brother” bandana for our dog that I was so excited to put it on him whenever I got a positive test at some point. So the morning of my first positive it was soooo faint. Like questioning what I was seeing. So I told myself I’d just wait and test with a FRER the next day. Did I wait? Nope. Legit bought one during the work day and peed on it while at work because I was so impatient. It was a clear positive. I knew I couldn’t wait until I got home to tell my husband, especially since we worked in the same building. So I scrambled to the little market in the building frantically searching for like Dads Root Beer or something symbolic. Closest I found was Pop Chips 😂 so went to his desk and someone was at his desk meeting with him. So had to just awkwardly drop them off as if I regularly deliver snacks to his desk. But then flashed the test at him while the person had their back to me. His eyes got so wide haha so he texted me when he was done with that meeting and we met up and got so excited!

That was horribly long lol anyway this time I just put a Big Sister shirt on our daughter and had her go into our office where he was working.

mamakate2011 · October 2020

Man, you guys are good! I haven’t been able to keep it from hubby for more than 2 minutes with all of my pregnancies (and there have been 6 of them including my two losses!). And every time he reacts the same....I go in, say “well...I have some news. I’m pregnant.” While putting the test in front of him. Every time he’s said “WHAT??” And sometimes not in a good way, like when we got pregnant with my third accidentally when my second was only 9 months old. That time was met with a “F*CK!!”. Ha! He has always taken a day or two to process the situation. Since this is baby #4, he pretty much panicked that first day saying we need a new house, we aren’t ready, we don’t have enough money, etc. UGG. Talk about Debbie Downer. He has come to his senses and is slowly getting more excited. I think he thought deep down that even though we were NTNP, that I wasn’t going to he KU since nothing has happened the last three years (that and I’m 41) - and honestly I thought the same thing. We were WRONG!!

I’m thrilled. I know he will be, but he usually doesn’t get super excited until I start getting bigger, he can feel the baby, he sees ultrasounds, etc.

mrs_massie · October 2020

@mamakate2011 My husband doesn't show much excitement or emotion with it either. I can always see fear and panic in his face. When we were approaching the time we wanted to start trying for a third i made him promise me he was going to act more excited next time i tell him lol

klj0228 · October 2020

@mamakate2011 my h doesn’t ascot excited either. He shows basically no emotion. Hence the “and?” After I told him.

emwj10187 · October 2020

I’m not a “surprise “ person. I tested positive at 5am....and I marched right back to our room and woke is ass up 😂 :: tap tap:: .... “ we’re having another baby” - he sprang right out of bed, I walked out and made us coffee. We
‘re still laughing about how I told him

nlc_atx · October 2020

@emwj10187 Same! I took a test when I got out of bed. It was faint so I woke him up, explained how the tests work, and then had him stare at it to figure out if there was a line too. He made coffee while I took a second test. :D Then I did the same thing the next morning after I got a digital test. I don't know how people keep it a secret long enough to put together a surprise.

kaitlinliz · October 2020

@mrs_massie that made me laugh out loud in bed ...so cute.

kaitlinliz · October 2020

I text him at work telling him I had to talk to him, he never responded...so I left the stick on the nightstand and when I heard him come home I made him come upstairs.....5 days later he still is in disbelief.

emwj10187 · October 2020

@nlc_atx 😂 I did the same with our first. I don’t have the patience for surprises. Although I think deep down DH would have liked to be surprised.

Omie_Wise · October 2020

I didn’t want to test because we’ve been trying for a comparative little amount of time but long for us.
I had bleeding that I thought was my period but it was tapering off and I had told my husband about this over cocktails. He told me I should test in the morning. Feeling antsy, I did the test and set a timer and when the timer was up I looked and 0.0 I just started screaming my husband’s name and I ran into the kitchen and sat down on the floor and cried, “it’s positive! It’s positive!”

MelissaMay82 · October 2020

I honestly did not think that I was really pregnant. AF was due Saturday, Friday morning I remembered I had some tests in the bathroom closet, I decided to take one seriously thinking that it was going to be negative. We do NFP/NTNP. It was very positive. DH had DD in the dining room I yelled to him "oh shit, come look at this." The lines were so dark (13 DPO) that he thought it was a faulty test. I proceed to take 3 more tests on Friday, all positive. We are very excited just taken by surprise.

With my last pregnancy we were trying so I started testing early maybe at 9 or 10 DPO. That week I took tests on both Thursday and Friday, both were negative. Saturday was the day of Kenny Chesney's big summer concert at Gillette Stadium so just to be safe I tested again. There was a faint line. I showed DH and he was super excited and then said "well I guess you are DD tonight" 🤣

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