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September 2020 Moms
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Supposed to be a bridesmaid?

marietdennismarietdennis member
in September 2020 Moms
So I was asked to be a bridesmaid in late December 2019, and I said yes. I found out I was pregnant in early January 2020. I am due September 19, 2020(according to last period; however, first ultrasound said September 24, 2020). The wedding is on October 10, 2020. I just told her I am pregnant this past weekend. She didn't mention my being in it, just said offhand that all of her bridesmaids keep getting pregnant (she had 1 drop out bc she's due next month and 1 is due in July but is staying in it.) My question is what do you all think? I am stressing so much about it already. I am nervous (this is my 1st baby) and I am also concerned about the amount I will have to put out for her shower, gifts, dress, shoes, bachelorette, etc. and I am trying to save every penny so I can have a little bit of money during my unpaid maternity. Should I step out? What should I say? Should I wait for her to bring it up? What if she doesn't? What if she gets mad? Any suggestions or advice is greatly appreciated!!!
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Re: Supposed to be a bridesmaid?

  • stezzi007stezzi007 member
    My best friend is getting married swptember 5th and asked me to be one of her bridesmaids...when she found out i was pregnant she asked me to not be in it...especially since im due september 9th...i still plan on going to the wedding but im happy i dont have to worry aboyt the costs of beung a bridesmaid
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  • NYTino24NYTino24 member
    This happened to me and *TW* I lost my first. I did get pregnant again two months later and I was 18 weeks at the wedding. I got a dress with an empire waist. This go round, it took 2 more losses and 13 months. Now I’ve lost one triplet. Point being you don’t know what might happen and if it’s stretching you too much, let her know.
    It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*

    Me: 36 DH 35 
    TTC  9/2016     BFP 12/9/16    EDD 8/21/17    NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
    TTC  2/2017  BFP 3/6/17   EDD 11/17/17   DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
    TTC 12/2018   BFP 6/2/19   EDD 2/12/20  NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
    TTC 7/2019   BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
    TTC 8/19    IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone  BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
    IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20

    AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
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  • mammamiasopapillamammamiasopapilla member
    I would politely decline since the situation has changed. You can still be involved and go to the bachelorette and wedding if you feel up to it, but IMO it’s way more stress than what it’s worth. 
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  • firsttimeresqfirsttimeresq member
    At the end of the day, your baby's health and your well being during the toughest time ever is way more important. If she's a true friend, she will understand. If she doesn't, then you didn't need her to begin with.

    Was supposed to be the MOH at my cousin's wedding in late August 2020. When I told her I was pregnant in Jan 2020, due Sept 7 2020, she got mad and stopped talking to me. People show you who they are. 
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  • marietdennismarietdennis member
    Oh my god! I'm sorry to hear that. So far, I told my friend when I'm due, but she hasn't mentioned anything about my stepping down. I plan to talk to her about it this weekend. I'm hoping she understands, but if not, you're absolutely right - my baby and my well being are the most important thing right now. Thank you for your input :blush:

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