I found out last night that my step-sister has told her side of the family about my being pregnant. Her aunt texted my mother to congratulate her. I am so upset, hurt, shocked and pissed. We haven't even told our aunts/cousins, etc who we are close with yet as we are waiting to clear first tri. I cannot believe she would do this to me esp with her being a mother herself!
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@ziggymama06 thats awful of your step sister! I hate it when people share your news like it's their own. That happened with my first pregnancy. Is it worth talking to her about? (My mom was the one who spilled to others last time so of course I confronted her lol and she apologized and really didn't realize what she was doing and how it would upset me.)
@ziggymama06 That is not cool! When we got pregnant with DS, my parents immediately told everyone in my family. I was sooo pissed. I think it was just because they were so excited about having their first grandchild, but still. This time around I repeatedly reminded them not to say a word and they respected that.
My TW is someone at work. She and I were working on a project for several months and she has not been pulling her weight. She was supposed to prepare something for me that she totally f***ed up. She did maybe 25% of what she’d been asked to do and I’m having to re-do the entire thing and push back my final report by several weeks. Luckily my manager took her off the project but I am still really pissed about it.
@caseysunshine1986 & @gomillis Thanks girls. I'm sorry your parents spilled the beans last time around and glad they are respecting your wishes this time. Not saying that it is right, but at least with first time grandparents they are just so excited so you could see why they would overshare... Not sure what my sister was thinking. When I told her I did ask her not to tell anyone and said that only our parents and siblings knew. And I did confront her and she blatantly lied and said she didn't say anything and tried to blame it on her dad. I believe him and he asked his sister who she heard it from... I cannot imagine him making up this whole story if he slipped. Raging so hard, but trying to let it go. What's done is done and I can't undo it. Trying to stay positive for baby and excited for today's appointment.
@gomillis Ugh, I hate working in groups on projects for that exact reason!! At least your boss recognized that she wasn't doing her job and removed her from the project, so you'll get all the credit. Sorry your deadlines are getting all pushed now!
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
My TW was my insomnia last night. I haven't had it consistently enough to seek medication, but last night was rough. I struggled to fall asleep due to random nausea and then I woke up like every hour for no reason. I feel like I didn't even get a decent stretch of sleep in until the morning hours, but then I had to get up for work, of course.
I took a nap when I got home, but then when I woke up the whole house smelled like garlic, so my nausea returned full force until I made myself eat some chicken strips.
@ziggymama06 <img alt="" src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/um/vzganu6vs1j7.gif"> That is just so many different kinds of messed up. I have no words.
@gomillis ugh, glad your boss had the wisdom to kick her off! What kind of work do you do? The nature of my work in customer service, I don't really have to collaborate like that, but it's still a team effort every day.
@faith_2911 yuck, I'm so sorry. Insomnia really sucks. I just can't sometimes if I'm running on not enough sleep.
@BusinessWife & @faith_2911 Thanks girls. She hasn't even responded... think this may be a big blowout
@faith_2911 Ugh, the insomnia is the worst because it totally throws off the entire next day!! I hope you are able to get make it through the day and get some good sleep tonight. Have that coffee this am if you need it!
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@BusinessWife I’m a user researcher for a big tech company in the travel industry. Most of my projects are very collaborative, so they really depend on everyone pulling their weight. I love collaboration when it goes well, but when it breaks down I often curse the fact that I can’t just do everything myself.
We have guests (H's family) staying with us this week that keep eating food that smells like food. Yesterday was fish, today is burritos. I feel silly complaining about people eating normal foods, but I can't be in my own kitchen without the smell making me vomit. If I can subsist off of bread and crackers, so can they!
@roo_baby Oh man that is rough. Is it warm enough by you to open the windows or at least turn on the exhaust fan to help ventilate the air quicker? I hope tomorrow's menu is a bit lighter. Good luck!
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
It's a little cold to open a window, but I might do it anyway. I need to eat something so I'm gonna have to go back in there. Tomorrow we are going out so it should be much better!
If it were my family I would just tell them they can't eat anything that smells, but it's hard when it's his family. I've told them I'm really nauseous and sensitive to smells right now, but they haven't gotten the hint. Even after I came into the room yesterday, started gagging and ran to the bathroom, they never apologized for the smell.
@roo_baby I'm impressed that you're hosting people at all while dealing with nausea, let alone putting up with their food smells! That must be so frustrating not being able to be in your own kitchen--especially considering how you have to eat often to stave off the nausea. Maybe your husband can say something to them if you feel uncomfortable doing so?
@faith_2911 they booked the trip before we got pregnant and we didn't tell them until they got her. It's mostly been fine having them here, and the nice thing about being pregnant is I can just go "lay down" whenever I don't want to socialize aka hide in my room and watch tv or play internet. But the smells are brutal.
@BusinessWife. W.T.F. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I assume you're close with the one person you told so maybe confront them, or just dont confide in them going forward. I just cannot understand people sharing others news!! Esp with it being so super early you haven't even told your family yet!!!!
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@ziggymama06 right??? I mean, I'm very new to the location, and the only reason we became closer since I've been there, is she was very public about her TTC struggles, and somehow she confided in me, and I ended up telling her we did ivf, because small world - same clinic. Whatever. But she knew that no one knew about that part, that we are very private about it, etc. But like, she had her IUI and I had my transfer the same. Friggin. Week. So work started to suspect, but it was messed up because however they got the impression they knew where she was going, and so I must be having the same kind of appointments? I never told anyone what my health issue was, or what kind of doctor, and it was nobody's business. So I think they connected a lot of dots, and she probably let it slip because she told them right away about herself.... And they already had their suspicions about me.... But she knew I was not ready to tell them.
And I mean, WHAT ARE THE CHANCES???? I'm so glad that it seems to have worked out for us both -- knock wood -- but it could have all gone very differently. I'm painfully aware of that. It took us three transfers to get to this bfp, and it still feels so fragile to me. Like I can't even believe that it's real. Forgive me if I'm not just Suzie sunshine blowing unicorn farts about how happy my first thing worked and omg I'm ku!!!! Idk. It definitely wasn't her news to share, and now I feel like a fool thinking maybe people didn't all already know, and when I was ready -- i.e. AFTER we told our family, -- I would be able to share it on my own terms. What a thing to have taken from me. I know you get it. I still don't even have words.
@BusinessWife Wow, just wow. How really rotten of her. You would think she would have known better!! And suspicions are just that until someone confirms... which should have been by YOU!! I'm so sorry and it totally sucks bc you need to see these people everyday. That girl totally proved to be a gossip and the whole office knows it. Screw her and enjoy sharing the news with the people who really matter to you.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@BusinessWife That's horrible. I've learned to be a bit more reserved with what I tell people who are very open with their own personal business. And yet we have still had issues this pregnancy with friends who are wonderful people but not very private accidentally sharing our news, with both our kid and other people. Like asking "Are you excited to be a big sister?" with someone who we intentionally hadn't told yet in earshot. First of all, we haven't used the word "sister" with our kid at all. We have talked casually about babies and how we want to have one, and where they come from, but we haven't directly told her we are having one in case things don't work out. Second of all, maybe think twice before saying anything loudly in front of other people. At least my kid is still pretty clueless, and the person who we hadn't told we were going to tell soon anyway. I would be livid if someone told my coworkers because that affects your career.
Re: TW Tuesday 1.21.20
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@gomillis Ugh, I hate working in groups on projects for that exact reason!! At least your boss recognized that she wasn't doing her job and removed her from the project, so you'll get all the credit. Sorry your deadlines are getting all pushed now!
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@gomillis That's super annoying! Glad you don't have to work with her anymore on this project, but still.
hubs: 26
ttc #1: 4/19
dx: PCOS
I took a nap when I got home, but then when I woke up the whole house smelled like garlic, so my nausea returned full force until I made myself eat some chicken strips.
hubs: 26
ttc #1: 4/19
dx: PCOS
<img alt="" src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/um/vzganu6vs1j7.gif">
That is just so many different kinds of messed up. I have no words.
@gomillis ugh, glad your boss had the wisdom to kick her off! What kind of work do you do? The nature of my work in customer service, I don't really have to collaborate like that, but it's still a team effort every day.
@faith_2911 yuck, I'm so sorry. Insomnia really sucks. I just can't sometimes if I'm running on not enough sleep.
@faith_2911 Ugh, the insomnia is the worst because it totally throws off the entire next day!! I hope you are able to get make it through the day and get some good sleep tonight. Have that coffee this am if you need it!
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
If it were my family I would just tell them they can't eat anything that smells, but it's hard when it's his family. I've told them I'm really nauseous and sensitive to smells right now, but they haven't gotten the hint. Even after I came into the room yesterday, started gagging and ran to the bathroom, they never apologized for the smell.
hubs: 26
ttc #1: 4/19
dx: PCOS
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
And I mean, WHAT ARE THE CHANCES???? I'm so glad that it seems to have worked out for us both -- knock wood -- but it could have all gone very differently. I'm painfully aware of that. It took us three transfers to get to this bfp, and it still feels so fragile to me. Like I can't even believe that it's real. Forgive me if I'm not just Suzie sunshine blowing unicorn farts about how happy my first thing worked and omg I'm ku!!!! Idk. It definitely wasn't her news to share, and now I feel like a fool thinking maybe people didn't all already know, and when I was ready -- i.e. AFTER we told our family, -- I would be able to share it on my own terms. What a thing to have taken from me. I know you get it. I still don't even have words.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl