It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
Trying to Get Pregnant
NYTino24
member
**This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage/spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and/or stillbirth may be mentioned.**
Options
TTCAL Week of 12/16-12/22/19
NYTino24
member
**This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage/spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and/or stillbirth may be mentioned.**
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
Status:
How are things going?
What is something that you are struggling with this week?
What is going well for you this week?
R/R?
Any testing coming up/any recent results?
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them?
Me: 36 DH 35
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
Re: TTCAL Week of 12/16-12/22/19
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.: MMC Oct '19
Status: WTO/quasi-benched (see below)
How are things going? Ehh, they're going. I have my pre-op for a D&C this morning.
What is something that you are struggling with this week? I was really hoping to not have to have a D&C, but the continued bleeding ever since my MMC two months ago has taken a major toll on my mental health.
What is going well for you this week? It feels surreal to be done with grad school. I don't have to worry about homework or due dates or attending classes. I am done!
R/R? Rant - It's just me and one other person in my office, and he's the type to talk/sing to himself and it is so flippin' annoying. Rave - DH and I went to an antique mall yesterday and I found some lovely candles that smell very home-y. It's difficult finding candles that I can use this time of year since DH is severely allergic to cinnamon.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? As mentioned before, I have my pre-op today for a D&C later this week. But, other than that, nothing on the horizon. I can't wait to get my cycle back.
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? When people say "seen" instead of "saw". As in, "I seen your mom the other day." Ugh!
Due with baby #2: Feb 2022
Status: Benched/ unknown
How are things going? meh. Im still waiting to hear from my RE about results, and Im just feeling lost. I wont be trying this month, but I want to make sure we can either try naturally in Jan, or know that we are moving forward with more interventions and TTA. Im just feeling anxious.
What is something that you are struggling with this week? See above I guess. Also teaching the week before break is HELL
What is going well for you this week? 4 more days, and one is a field trip. I just cant wait to be done teaching. I need a break.
R/R? Ranting that my office is FREEZING. I just cant get warm today. Rave, Im almost done with this kids this year. Im so tired.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Still waiting on my results. UGH
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? evaluation and equivalent are so hard. I also always type true incorrectly the first time.
@ttcbabyodo So sorry you are still dealing with your MMC. FX the D&C will work for you. Congrats of finishing grad school though! Thats such a huge accomplishment.
Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17
BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19
BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19
BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2
Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage
IVF started Feb 2020
retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal.
Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. Early miscarriage at 5 weeks December '18, CP July '19
Status: TWW
How are things going? Ok I guess. I have *so far* made it through the season without a meltdown. I will find out if I am KU this cycle a day or two before Christmas. Not happy with the timing of that.
What is something that you are struggling with this week? Tomorrow is exactly a year since our first loss. I hope I can make it through the work day without crying. In other news, it's the week before Christmas so naturally my students are climbing the walls.
What is going well for you this week? Just a few more Christmas presents to pick up! The rest are being delivered tomorrow.
R/R? I wish I had never started "Elf on the Shelf" in my classroom. So sick of remembering that smirky little jerk every day.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Betas next Monday, maybe? If AF stays away.
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? I get irked when people say "exspecially" instead of "especially".
emeraldduchess LOL to elf on a shelf. I hope I never have to deal with that or get suckered into it. I hate when people say "acrosst instead of across" just no.
littlebug2010 I'm glad you can get a break soon
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
Status: WTO
How are things going? meh. just trying to be patient knowing this could be a long cycle...
What is something that you are struggling with this week? Trying to be grateful for what we do have..
What is going well for you this week? I bought the CBAD tests and have remembered to take them two days in a row?
R/R? WHY DO PEOPLE INCLUDE PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENTS ON CHRISTMAS CARDS?! I started crying opening one of someone I already knew their news, but it's just like a slap in the face.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? betas are now negative, should get fragile x and karyotypes back in the next week or two
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? I know someone who says "schnot" and not "snot" when referring to boogers/nasal drainage. It drives me up the wall.
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
I promise I’ll be back for a full post & tags later!
Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17
BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19
BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19
BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2
Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage
IVF started Feb 2020
retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal.
Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. Early losses around 5 weeks this month and last month
Status: WTO I guess? Really waiting to stop bleeding. Also, my OBGYN practice doesn’t say you need to TTA after CP/preclinical losses, but given it didn’t work out great last time I’m not sure what I want to do this cycle...and my follow up appointment isn’t until next month.
How are things going? As above, I’m conflicted as to next steps. Part of me wants to keep trying right away, I’m stuck in this “time is ticking, you’ve already wasted months” mindset. Another part of me doesn’t think I could handle a third back to back loss
What is something that you are struggling with this week? I asked DH to make some lifestyle changes to support healthy conception. I’ve been reading about a sperm quality and dna fragmentation and risk for early loss, and I want him to do everything he can. I’ve already done a bunch of things that have fairly weak evidence (but I just want to do something), so when I presented him with some recent scientific papers I thought he would be on board. But he’s actually been fairly resistant. I don’t know if this is because he’s stuck in his ways, or because he thinks this is more likely a problem with my parts instead of his...but it’s really frustrating. The only bright side is I’m fairly certain at our REI appointment they’re going to say the same thing I’m saying, and maybe he’ll take it better from and expert.
What is going well for you this week? I’m glad I was able to get in to see REI fairly quickly, especially since I don’t completely meet the diagnostic criteria for RPL.
R/R? Holidays man. I just have so much anxiety about going home to see my family. I have some weird dynamics with many of them, especially my sister, and I was hesitant to fly home when I knew a lot of my extended family was also going home but then with both my brief pregnancies, I felt relieved that the exciting news would trump the anxiety....
Any testing coming up/any recent results? REI appointment first week of January. Not sure what they’re going to run if anything. I’m very interested in getting some progesterone testing since I’ve always had super light periods, and I had a Mirena IUD for 8 years and was completely amenorrheic during that time.
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? Necessary gets me, especially when I think about it too much.
@ttcbabyodo I hope the D&C goes well and you stop bleeding and can move forward! And hope your mental health turns around
@littlebug2010 I’m sorry you’re feeling lost and I hope the results come back soon!
@emeraldduchess I’m so sorry about your anniversary, and the timing of finding out this cycle. Holidays definitely seem to sharpen all of the feelings, good or bad. I’m so hoping they’re good for you this cycle!!
@flinstone-2 I hope it’s not too long a cycle for you. And that there are no more unwanted card-based ambushes! These things should have TWs. I am terrified to see any of my newly married family members or open Christmas cards for this very reason. Also, “schnot” makes me want to throw up.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
MC at 7 weeks in 01/19 & at 5 weeks (CP) in 08/19
Status: WTO
How are things going? Ok...going into this cycle with the plan to not get hopeful...I want to just let things happen and not read into every little thing!
What is something that you are struggling with this week? Christmas...we should have an almost 4 month old right now...but we don’t! I asked DH if we could get 2 angel ornaments to remember our angels, and he said he really likes the idea but he isn’t quite ready to do that. He doesn’t talk about the losses as much as I do, but comments like that show me that he still feels the pain just like I do! And it breaks my heart all over again!
What is going well for you this week? Only 2 more days of work before having 5 days off! Also, I’m really enjoying my social media decrease, I feel like it has helped a ton!
R/R? Just wanted to send you all the love & hugs...I know this is going to be a tough time for all of us!! 💜💜💜
Any testing coming up/any recent results? None.
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? Pretty sure I cringe at all of the ones you all have already mentioned, although schnot is a new one but it definitely made me cringe! I also get irritated when people mix up there, their, and they’re!! If I’m sending a text really quick and use the wrong one, I get so embarrassed and have to send an update immediately...even to DH!
@ttcbabyodo congrats on being completely done with grad school, that has to be a huge relief!! Not sure exactly when your D&C is/was...but praying all goes/went well!! 💜
@littlebug2010 I hope you get your results from your RE soon! The not knowing can be so frustrating!! I hope the rest of your week goes well and you enjoy your break!!
@emeraldduchess been thinking about you, friend!! I have everything crossed that you get wonderful news on Monday!!!
@flinstone-2 I hope you get good results back and very soon! Ugh, so sorry you had to deal with that announcement! I would not handle that well either! Sending hugs your way!
@notagoodpatient I hope you feel comfortable with whatever you decide to do about trying or not this cycle! So sorry YH wasn’t on board with making changes...I hope he will be more receptive when it comes from the doctor! I hope your holiday visit goes better than expected!!
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. MC at 7 weeks November, 2019
Status: Still waiting sometime in this century for AF to come.
How are things going? Ehh, hit and miss. Some days I’m great and happy and other days I’m bawling my eyes out.
What is something that you are struggling with this week? My hormones have been all over the map again. I thought when my hcg was going down I would find more of a balance but lately it’s been almost worse. I have been insanely moody lately and irritable and or crying over everything happy or sad which isn’t normal for me.
What is going well for you this week? Well, I’ve been crazy busy at work lately which keeps my mind occupied and DH and I went to a Christmas brunch on Sunday with his parents and family etc. Was at a really posh and fancy hotel and the food was sooo good. Ate way too much 😆 I had a lot of fun.
R/R? Only 4 more days of work left and then I’m off for awhile. Yay. So looking forward to that 😁
Any testing coming up/any recent results? No. Not till next Monday. My doc said after the previous week of beta testing I can go 2 weeks in between now. Let’s pray and hope next weeks beta test brings good results of very low or zero HCG. 🤞 I’m over this.
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? What bugs me is when people say the word Library wrong. Most people say Lie-Bary, not Lie-Brare-ee.
@ttcbabyodo I hope your D&C went smoothly, or if you haven’t had it yet I hope it will!
@littlebug2010 and @flinstone-2 I hope you got your results or will soon!
everyone else, hope you are enjoying time off, or getting close to some time off, and being gentle with yourself during this often trying season!!
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
Does any of you ladies know what number your HCG has to be at in order to turn a faintish line on a pregnancy test? Or what number it has to be at or below to turn the test negative and not show up at all? I’m curious.
@mindyb2019 - I think it depends on the test. Some tests require 50 mIU/ML to show a line, and some (like FRER and some internet cheapies) detect lower than that. After my recent loss, it took what seemed like FOREVER for my HCG to drop, but then again, I was at around 110,000 mIU/ML at the time of my loss, so that was to be expected. I don't think I got to the point of turning a faint line on an internet cheapie until around 6 or 8 weeks after my loss.
Due with baby #2: Feb 2022
*TMI warning* I had not realized the amount of discomfort I'd have afterward. It literally feels like I used a toilet brush as a tampon. And the only things they gave me for pain were Ibuprofen and Tylenol, which they told me to alternate between. I'm really having to force myself to take it easy and rest up, which is hard because we're in the process of cleaning and packing for us to fly out to visit MH's parents on Monday. *end warning*
Due with baby #2: Feb 2022
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
NMC 1/17, BO 6/19, CP 8/19
Status: WTO, IUI #4
How are things going? Not hopeful. RE is working on IVF approval
What is something that you are struggling with this week? Everything
What is going well for you this week? Winter break starts Monday at 1:30
R/R? Just bracing myself for Christmas announcements... I post occasionally about infertility and loss on social media and I don’t expect others to shield me from pain, but that doesn’t mean I want to see them. Most people are very supportive.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Had BW and US on Thursday and started Follistim
GTKY: What word(s) do you always struggle to spell or see others mess up and cringe when you see it/them? Homophones... I drill them into my students as much as possible. It’s careless to make those mistakes!
@littlebug2010 @emeraldduchess I’m with you. These kids are killing me!!
@flinstone-2 I know it’s an emotional time, but I’m sure you’re glad to have it be over.
@notagoodpatient the repeated loss club is not one anyone wants to join. Sorry you’re with us.
@bluetickgal Would he go for Willow Tree statues?
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
AFM, I woke up to cramps and spotting so AF is right around the corner. I am feeling angry and bitter as hell this morning. The day before my birthday and so close to Christmas this feels like a massive slap in the face. Is there a TTC rage room out there? Because there should be.
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
@NYTino24 so sorry your struggling with everything this week. I hope you will be able to relax and enjoy your winter break off from work.
@NYTino24 I’m sorry you aren’t feeling hopeful...I’m glad you are working on next steps with IVF, but I really hope you don’t need them! That’s crazy you have to work on Monday...I would have if I didn’t take the day off, but I wouldn’t think teachers would! Is it just a professional development day, or will students be there too? I don’t know if DH would go for the Willow Tree statue idea...he liked that the ornaments would be a visible reminder, but wouldn’t be permanent in our home. I get it...and we don’t need something physical to remember (we will never forget), but I also think he will be more open when there has been more time/healing! @emeraldduchess I’m so sorry, friend!! Your feelings are totally valid, this is all so unfair!! I hope you are able to enjoy your Birthday and the holidays...but I understand it will be very tough! Sending so many hugs your way!! 💜
And I’m sending hugs & positive vibes to everyone! I know this is going to be a tough week...but we are all strong, and I know we can make it! I hope we can all find some happiness during this holiday season!!