@pirateduck I feel the same way with three dogs, two kids, and a husband that regularly has mud on his boots. But I've warned him that this time (with two babies coming), I think we should go no shoes in the house. It would really cut down on the dirt and grossness that babies crawl around in.
I have hardwoods everywhere but the bedrooms. I alternate weeks, so two weeks a month I just run the swiffer over the floor and two weeks a month I use the steam mop. Keeps the floors shiny and mostly clean. I have a dog, two cats, two boys and a husband that has filthy work boots. We are also a no shoe in the house family. Shoes are disgusting and I have an immuno compromised child.
@rox7777 Okay, so I have a dumb question about the logistics of no shoes. Do you still keep your shoes in your room and just put them on/take them off in the garage? Because I have a lot of shoes and my closet is really the only place for them.
@ruby696 I bought one of those rub shoe mats and that sits in the garage. MH takes his boots off at the door. The kids have outdoor shoes that they keep there. Otherwise shoes are taken off at the door and put away in the closets. I started teaching the kids that habit pretty early on so they’re really good about removing them and putting them away. I do have a pair of run out the door shoes that I keep next the front door for taking the dog out and whatnot.
@rox7777 I'm going to have to work that out. We have too many people running around now to keep tracking in all the dirt and other nastiness outside when babies are on the floor.
@ruby696 Growing up my mom had shoe buckets assigned to each person. Shoes were kept in the buckets and once a month she’d sort through and the shoes worn less often would be put back in the closet. We don’t keep that many shoes per person and I tend to be a throw on slides 90% of the time type of person. 🤦🏻♀️
@rox7777 MH is the problem. He's in and out so much, doing work on the cars/yard/house. He's going to give me major pushback if he has to keep taking boots on and off. Oh well, he'll just have to get over it. We have dogs too, but they're getting old (my doberman mix is almost 17!). I'll truly miss them when they're gone, but no gonna lie, I'm looking forward to cleaner floors.
@ruby696 My husband has the spider steel toe work boots. No laces. No buckles. They just slide on and off. That changed our lives when it comes to taking boots off. When he was in the military we fought over his boots far more often because they required pacing, special pant/sock attachments, etc.
My 60lb bulldog mutt is a horrific shedder. MH finally bought me a roomba that we run nightly because I had a mental breakdown over the daily dog hair on the floor.
We *try* and do no shoes in the house, but then you go to the car and realize you forgot something etc. The reality is more like shoes only on the tile. There is tile where you walk in the front door that continues through the kitchen/laundry room and I have a boot mat and shoe rack, or wet boots end up on the tile in front of the wood stove. We also each have house shoes/slippers/sandals, something that slips on and off easy that we tend to keep near the front door, so we can take off one pair and put on another. I put "summer" shoes in the closet right now and only winter boots are out, mostly, so they aren't all piled by the front door, just the ones that are worn most often. We try and be good about this, but it's not perfect. My husband especially tries with his work boots and I have a pair of muck boots just for taking care of the chickens/ducks that slip on/off and never get worn through the house (don't need poop everywhere!).
I have a bench next to the door with cabinets where shoes can be stored. If I am wearing a pair of shoes from my closet, I carry them to the door to put them on. But generally, I tend to wear the same couple of pairs most days, so they stay in the bench. I have slippers that I wear around the house, and when I'm about to leave, I take my slippers off, take my shoes out of the bench, and put my slipper in the bench. That way, when I get home, my slippers are in the bench already, so I just take off my shoes and put the slippers on. BUT whenever our parents visit, they never seem to take of their shoes and it drives me nuts. My step-FIL wears his big ass motorcycle boots and just clomps loudly around my house, and the floors are always filthy after he leaves. It makes me so mad.
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
We are no shoes in the house too. Sometimes shoes get worn into the kitchen, but not upstairs or into the carpeted living room. We have a coat closet by the door that most of the shoes are supposed to stay in. People (my parents are living with us now) are only supposed to keep one pair out. Of course that's not always followed.
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@pirateduck Yaaaay! You get the gold star of the day. I never mop mine enough either. Mostly because my house is mostly hardwoods and you're not supposed to steam them too much because it can damage them, and dry-mopping is a PITA. I would love to get one of those little robot mops, but I'd only really be able to use it in the kitchen. Still considering it, though.
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
@shamrocandroll I know I said swiffer, but I actually have a microfiber mop with a refillable spray bottle sort of like a swiffer. I use the bona refillable and that’s what I clean the floors with in between steaming. We have that laminate wood flooring because my kids are so, so, so rough on floors. But I’m not a mopper by any means.
@rox7777 I only have hardwood because it's what was in the house, and it was too beautiful to tear up. We did laminate in his room, and it's soooo much easier to maintain! I use this stuff with a dry mop on the hardwoods when they get messy beyond the point of sweeping/vacuuming:
In fairness, I only did the tile areas, but still something I never normally do. The pergo just got swept/vacuumed the other day. I think I may get a different mop or something for that flooring because I don't like getting it too wet too regularly.
@pirateduck I'm doing floors today too! My mom just told me that hot water, vinegar, and a drop of dawn cleans laminate floors better than the specialty cleaner, so I'm trying it today. Plus, I can use it on the time. I'm freakishly excited for this.
@rox7777 SHOES IN THE HOUSE IS SO GROSS! DFs family all fucking wear them and I can’t stand it I’m always like nope this is my house and there is so much nasty on shoes I don’t want in here.
Jumping in late @roxx7777 I hate when you don't get to pick out clothes for your own kid. Thankfully I have fulfilled my mothers need of buying everything along with being able to pick stuff out myself, she has decided she'd rather take me shopping and I can pick stuff out or if I'm not going to see her in awhile she'll ask if I need x,y or z and send me screenshots of what she was thinking about getting with options and either I can pick or send her a screen shot and link of what I would prefer.
My MIL when she just doesn't get it and hopefully she realizes she never sees clothes she buys on DD because she can't figure out that DD doesn't need a summer romper in size 18-24 months when she's wearing 9 moth clothes and won't fit said romper until January. Or this week decides to DD more gifts (after giving her a bunch of crap for Thanksgiving, and Christmas is 2 weeks away) in size 3T that she, and I quote "Needs right now" it's a football jersey and tshirt in size 3T my daughter is a tiny 18 month old who I have to roll pant legs and arms on most of her 18 month clothing!
We live in a small apartment during the school year and have no room for all the toys and crap we receive. In the summer time we're outside on our property all day long and DD would rather throw rocks in the creek and play with toads then sit inside and play with dumb toys so I hate that they keep giving us crap.
To bring this all back to cleaning, our biggest cleaning hurdle is all the clutter from toys and papers and books. I've put away a lot of DDs books so she only has two of those square shelves full. We were trying to keep toys in one or two of the square drawers for those shelves but some were too large and are now in a random amazon box to keep them from being underfoot. She'll be getting a toy chest from us for Christmas so hopefully that will help. We do 4 gifts from us for Christmas, the want, need, wear, read. and a couple from santa. I'm hoping other keep things low key again this year but I fear the amount of shit we are about to get. I'm really tempted in tell MIL to take it back to NY with her for that house so I don't have to see it.
As far as real cleaning MH decided he'd hire the person who cleans the apartment beneath us on the same schedule, she does the floors, counters, and bathroom and then folds all of our clothing. It's been a God send to have her come every 2 weeks because whenever I feel I can get something done, DD pulls it all apart anyhow. At least this way I know the floor has been cleaned at least once in two weeks and when my kid eats something off the floor I don't have to questions as much.
@pirateduck it works out well and makes you really think about the perfect item in that category. This year her want is a ride on bike/scooting thing for the inside the house, her need is a toy chest, her read sadly MH picked out the two books at our book fair and when I tried to return them they had shut down and the books are awful stories I'll get stuck reading, and her wear will be a baseball cap like MHs because she likes putting his on and walking around the house with it.
The few we have from Santa are bath toys, magnets, and a small tool chest with tools (She loves "fixing" her bike with random bolts and wrenches she finds).
@jhysmath We do $100 per kid, it keeps their Christmas fairly small from us because they have three sets of grandparents too. I put together a wishlist and send it to all of the grandparents and let them know what we need or the kids want. I have a toy under $20 rule otherwise everyone tries to buy oversized crap we don’t need or have room for. I’m still overwhelmed with toys so we have bins that get rotated every few weeks. MIL is the one that strictly doesn’t listen. She shows up with freaking yard bags for each kid and most of it gets donated within a month. Also, I think they’re clueless because my kids don’t wear the clothes she buys either (she’s notorious for buying all the wrong sizes, even when I send her texts with their sizes and preferences).
@rox7777 what is it about being a MIL that makes you do dumb stuff like that? I personally hope if I ever have a son he is gay and technically I won't have a daughter in law, provided my daughter marries a man too. My mom lucked out and my brother is gay so she won't get stuck with a DIL. I wish I could donate/toss things MIL gives DD but MH is one of those people who are like well so and so gave us this we can't get rid of it. We have 3 very expensive knife blocks at our house in NH and a matching one at the house in NY. When we move to NY we will have 4 of them. One was from FIL (who has passed) the other two are from our wedding, one matches the one FIL got us but in another color but that person passed shortly after our wedding so we can get rid of that one and the other set is smaller so we can't get rid of that because so and so will come to the house and see we don't have it and be offended. It would also be one thing if these knives were the type that suck and you would throw away eventually but they're really good and have a lifetime warranty and we can bring them back to the factory in the next town over to be sharpened whenever we want. So for now we have about $4k in knives sitting on our counter.
I also put together what we want/need and last year they were all pretty good. I told my mom to get her museum/zoo passes for the family, she listened but also go her a rocking horse and a wooden rattle. I was okay with both of these. My brother and his partner got her a book subscription and that was amazing getting new books every month. My sister got her a music set which was fine too. MIL/BIL were told to get us a bike trailer and they did well and got the exact one we wanted, but then MIL decided she needed 100 new outfits and BIL decided she needed a leapfrog computer at 7 months. Thankfully the computer didn't work and we no longer own that.
This year I told my mom that the museum pass got used well but the zoo one we didn't use as much so skip that. I also gave her three more ideas for anyone who is looking to get her something toddler sized hooded towels, something to climb on, a doll she can dress and cars. MH gave MIL and BIL a list which included a bunch of stuff I feel she doesn't need and when you give them a list they feel the need to buy everything. One thing I told him to tell them not to get her was a doll because I wanted to be the one to get her her first doll, of course after being told not to get her a doll MIL went out and bought her one as a "Thanksgiving" present so I told my mom she could get one now too. I'm a little bummed we won't be able to tell everyone about the new baby until Christmas because when I was pregnant with DD I said no clothes because I won't know what size I will be after baby comes (MHs family all gives the ugliest clothes I never wear and end up donating the next year with tags still on them) and they all listened and gave me gift cards to store so I could buy either maternity clothes or clothes when I was back to other sizes.
@shamrocandroll my favorite part is "get dog if you don't have one"
I think most of us have very similar tastes with our own moms, whereas we don't really have that shared, developed-over-a-long-time style with our MILs. My mom and I are super similar in a lot of ways, and she always nails it when it comes to buying things for DD that I would also choose. I'm curious to find out if that will be the case for my future SIL (my brother's fiancee) when they have the MIL/DIL relationship. My mom also has always been really thoughtful when it comes to gift giving, so that helps.
My MIL has gotten a lot better with me over time in this area. She has no daughters of her own, but has three DILs, and of the three of us, I have the most specific style, tastes, interests, etc. H and I have been together for 16 years and she has gotten a lot better at thinking about what I would actually want or like rather than something she would like and projecting her style or taste onto me. This has transferred over to DD and the other grandkids as well.
Re: Cleaning schedule?
My 60lb bulldog mutt is a horrific shedder. MH finally bought me a roomba that we run nightly because I had a mental breakdown over the daily dog hair on the floor.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
It really wasn't a big deal and didn't take all that long. Now I'm questioning why I never do this as part of my regular cleaning.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B06XS62VDN/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@roxx7777 I hate when you don't get to pick out clothes for your own kid. Thankfully I have fulfilled my mothers need of buying everything along with being able to pick stuff out myself, she has decided she'd rather take me shopping and I can pick stuff out or if I'm not going to see her in awhile she'll ask if I need x,y or z and send me screenshots of what she was thinking about getting with options and either I can pick or send her a screen shot and link of what I would prefer.
My MIL when she just doesn't get it and hopefully she realizes she never sees clothes she buys on DD because she can't figure out that DD doesn't need a summer romper in size 18-24 months when she's wearing 9 moth clothes and won't fit said romper until January. Or this week decides to DD more gifts (after giving her a bunch of crap for Thanksgiving, and Christmas is 2 weeks away) in size 3T that she, and I quote "Needs right now" it's a football jersey and tshirt in size 3T my daughter is a tiny 18 month old who I have to roll pant legs and arms on most of her 18 month clothing!
We live in a small apartment during the school year and have no room for all the toys and crap we receive. In the summer time we're outside on our property all day long and DD would rather throw rocks in the creek and play with toads then sit inside and play with dumb toys so I hate that they keep giving us crap.
To bring this all back to cleaning, our biggest cleaning hurdle is all the clutter from toys and papers and books. I've put away a lot of DDs books so she only has two of those square shelves full. We were trying to keep toys in one or two of the square drawers for those shelves but some were too large and are now in a random amazon box to keep them from being underfoot. She'll be getting a toy chest from us for Christmas so hopefully that will help. We do 4 gifts from us for Christmas, the want, need, wear, read. and a couple from santa. I'm hoping other keep things low key again this year but I fear the amount of shit we are about to get. I'm really tempted in tell MIL to take it back to NY with her for that house so I don't have to see it.
As far as real cleaning MH decided he'd hire the person who cleans the apartment beneath us on the same schedule, she does the floors, counters, and bathroom and then folds all of our clothing. It's been a God send to have her come every 2 weeks because whenever I feel I can get something done, DD pulls it all apart anyhow. At least this way I know the floor has been cleaned at least once in two weeks and when my kid eats something off the floor I don't have to questions as much.
The few we have from Santa are bath toys, magnets, and a small tool chest with tools (She loves "fixing" her bike with random bolts and wrenches she finds).
I also put together what we want/need and last year they were all pretty good. I told my mom to get her museum/zoo passes for the family, she listened but also go her a rocking horse and a wooden rattle. I was okay with both of these. My brother and his partner got her a book subscription and that was amazing getting new books every month. My sister got her a music set which was fine too. MIL/BIL were told to get us a bike trailer and they did well and got the exact one we wanted, but then MIL decided she needed 100 new outfits and BIL decided she needed a leapfrog computer at 7 months. Thankfully the computer didn't work and we no longer own that.
This year I told my mom that the museum pass got used well but the zoo one we didn't use as much so skip that. I also gave her three more ideas for anyone who is looking to get her something toddler sized hooded towels, something to climb on, a doll she can dress and cars. MH gave MIL and BIL a list which included a bunch of stuff I feel she doesn't need and when you give them a list they feel the need to buy everything. One thing I told him to tell them not to get her was a doll because I wanted to be the one to get her her first doll, of course after being told not to get her a doll MIL went out and bought her one as a "Thanksgiving" present so I told my mom she could get one now too. I'm a little bummed we won't be able to tell everyone about the new baby until Christmas because when I was pregnant with DD I said no clothes because I won't know what size I will be after baby comes (MHs family all gives the ugliest clothes I never wear and end up donating the next year with tags still on them) and they all listened and gave me gift cards to store so I could buy either maternity clothes or clothes when I was back to other sizes.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
I think most of us have very similar tastes with our own moms, whereas we don't really have that shared, developed-over-a-long-time style with our MILs. My mom and I are super similar in a lot of ways, and she always nails it when it comes to buying things for DD that I would also choose. I'm curious to find out if that will be the case for my future SIL (my brother's fiancee) when they have the MIL/DIL relationship. My mom also has always been really thoughtful when it comes to gift giving, so that helps.
My MIL has gotten a lot better with me over time in this area. She has no daughters of her own, but has three DILs, and of the three of us, I have the most specific style, tastes, interests, etc. H and I have been together for 16 years and she has gotten a lot better at thinking about what I would actually want or like rather than something she would like and projecting her style or taste onto me. This has transferred over to DD and the other grandkids as well.
FIL, on the other hand...