@modoodles In my experience they usually have wanted to see me btw 6-8 weeks for an early dating ultrasound, and then normal prenatals start at 12 weeks.
DS1: Nov. 2013 DS2: Jan. 2016 DS3: Dec. 2017 Baby #4 on the way!
@blaf322 yeah, they aren't doing an initial confirmation. I will have a counseling appointment with a nurse around 8 weeks, to go over a few things pregnancy related, but she said there wouldn't be any bloodwork or anything that day. I just found it hard to believe they aren't checking anything until 12 weeks. And I thought the further along you are, the less accurate an ultrasound is for dating?
@modoodles That does seem a little off for you to not even have a confirmation appt. And with what @KatieEl is saying, I'd maybe try to reach out to the practice again, talk to another RN (or maybe the practice manager would be better) to make sure that nurse's info is correct and if it is/you're not okay with that, start looking around.
@modoodles My doctor does the initial appt between 8 and 12 weeks. STill, that's frustrating because I know you're anxious. It wouldn't hurt to call them and ask if you could get an earlier appt right? Let them know you are feeling uneasy bc of your recent loss. My doctor does the initial appt between 8 and 12 weeks.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@modoodles that’s frustrating! In your shoes, I think I’d be really explicit. I’d say, “due to my recent loss I’m not comfortable with waiting that long for a first scan. Can you get me in earlier or should I find alternative care?” I think it’s really important to feel supported and heard in your care relationships and if that isn’t happening, go elsewhere. I know that can be a privileged perspective if you’re in a health plan that is inflexible or in an area without a wealth of options, but I hope you have some alternatives if your current doctor doesn’t listen to your concerns.
I agree with @rachelredhead - it's so important to advocate for yourself.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@rachelredhead thank you for that. I sent this message through the patient portal and have placed a few phone calls to other provider offices in the meantime. I really, really hope they can get me in a little sooner. This Dr. was so good during my mc, so I was really thrown for a loop today.
@modoodles good for you! Not seeing you until 12 weeks seems crazy to me. My office schedules the first appt (with US) between 6-8 weeks. I hope they get you in sooner!
@modoodles You're right that sounds a bit weird to me. my doctor starts to see patients at 6w. Last pregnancy my 1st appointment was a little after 7w for an initial scan, questions, dating, bloodwork. At 11-12 weeks I had my NT scan and more bloodwork. I would ask again, or consider another doctor, but I wouldn't wait too late since it's the holidays soon and you may not be able to get an appointment. Sorry you're dealing with this.
Prenatal gummies! I’m already taking the Garden of Life prenatals, but with my last pregnancy, I had a really hard time swallowing the vitamins in the first trimester, so I was planning to get some gummies for that stage. I know the problem with them is the lack of iron. I was wondering if anyone knew anything about iron gummies taken with the prenatal gummies?
@kristinl492 they actually don’t make iron gummies. The reason is that iron is extremely deadly to children and too many overdoses occurred when kids got into gummy vitamins.
My doctor called back before 7 this morning and is having me go do bloodwork to make sure betas are doubling between Monday and Wednesday, and is also going to retest my thyroid levels. This honestly makes me feel 100x better.
Those who had or are pregnant with twins, talk to me about your HCG.....???
My HCG went from 4,316 to 10,823 (4 weeks+2 and 4 weeks+4). Seems so high, more than doubled (esp compared to my first, which I was kind of high with him 971 and 2500, same timing).
I know it it huge range....but my mom and her aunt had fraternal twins, I am older (almost 38) and I am overweight. Those are 3 things that increase chances for twins.
Nurse was surprised how high but says she's seen women triple or quadruple with just one.
@busymom247 wow, those numbers are high, even for twins. I had done some HCG googling myself bc my HCG is high, and there seem to be 4 possible explanations for out of range HcGs. 1) your assumed date of ovulation is off; 2) twins +; 3) a molar pregnancy or 4) Down syndrome. Long story short, u/s and NIPT will help determine if any of those are a factor for either of us.
@busymommy23 there is a website, betabase.com. You can see what they levels say there and can see for multiples too. It is also great for doubling time.
**TW Loss/pregnancy mentioned** Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 5/30/16 and MC on 7/6/16 BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17 BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19 BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19 BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2 Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage IVF started Feb 2020 retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal. Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
Mommy to a super cute havanesse puppy and baby boy!
Is anyone else "advanced maternal age". I'm 38. The last time I was pregnant I was 33. Is there a huge difference in stuff now that I crossed over into advanced age? Like do I need to do more tests and be seen more? I haven't made an initial appointment yet because I'm still processing this surprise still. When I had my last I know I did an extra blood test early on even though I wasn't advanced yet but my doctor is really through in a lot of things and I have insurance that covers a lot so I know I do a little more testing and sonograms because it's covered and my doctor likes to be sure.
I will be 38 when my second baby is born (birthday next month) and I was 35 when my son was born(pregnant at 34 but they base it on age you will be when baby is born). There was no difference in my care. I had one OB/GYN laughed and roll her eyes about "ama". She pulled out pen and paper and explained why 35 is considered the age of "high risk". It is because at age 35, IF there is an amniocentesis, there is higher risk than benefit. She said if you're healthy, etc there is no concern and that some 35+ people are healthier than some younger people. I saw midwives for my pregnancy. One bonus was my insurance covered 100% any DNA testing, quad markers etc should I want it (& we did because I would want to be prepared if something was wrong).
I do believe, from friends who were 40+ when they had babies, they are truly a bit more high risk and are monitored more closely. I have friends who had babies at age 43, one at 45 and met a lady recently who had a baby at 46! My best friend's mom is from another country and said "Only in America are we so concerned with older moms". My grandma had my dad in 1940 when she was 40 (his dad was 50).
@enchantindragon@busymom247 I’m 38 and will be 39 in a couple weeks. My doctor didn’t even mention it when I saw her this week. When I went in last year to discuss getting pregnant she detailed some of the increased risks but really downplayed that over-35 stuff. I know one benefit is the better insurance coverage for screenings so I’m happy about that. I have aunts who had their last babies at 40, so that makes me feel a little better. Trying to remind myself I’m not the only first time mom at 39. 😁
I'm 44 and will turn 45 right before baby arrives. I had my first at 43. I wasn't considered truly 'high risk' but they did do extra testing and then toward the end I had weekly ultrasounds.
edited because I couldn't remember how old in 2018
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@enchantindragon, I'm 41, baby will be due just after my 42nd birthday.
Current pregnancy - First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
Four prior losses, no living children - 1 first trimester miscarriage, 1 blighted ovum, 1 chemical, and one extreme premature live birth daughter who died at 15 days old.
@enchantindragon I’m 40 (and would be at birth); 1st child at 38. I didn’t have a high-risk Ob or any extra supplemental tests/scans. That said, I do have a platelet disorder, and given how last pregnancy unfolded, if I graduate to the OB this time it needs to be a high risk practice. (But not bc of age).
So I had my first appointment today to get blood work and a pee sample done. I spoke to the midwife there and she said I have to see the high risk doctor in their practice as well. She also talked to me about these other tests I can take, the Panorama to test the baby and the Horizon to test me to see if Im a carrier for any genetic diseases. I spoke to their coordinator and my insurance seems to cover all this I am going to do the Horizon one at my next appointment in Dec when I get a sonogram and then the Panorama is done when Im 9 weeks gestational I believe. Has anyone else done these? They are just blood work they said so nothing different in that regards.
Just happy to see several other AMA rockstars in this BMB. 😁
I went to the gym over lunch and jeeeeeeeez my sports bra nearly killed me. Any recommendations on sports bras for the well-endowed? I was a DD before pregnancy and now it’s just...madness. And I’m assuming this is only the beginning.
@enchantindragon With my first I did the MaterniT21 test which I think is similar to Panorama. It was a blood test that would detect for chromosome abnormalities and would also tell us gender. It took 2 weeks to get the results.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75@enchantindragon I also did the MaterniT21 blood test. Bc I had done a FET with a PGS tested embryo and we had also done genetic screening before IVF, we didn’t do any further tests. My Ob felt that the odds of spontaneous m/c from an amnio was about equal to odds of discovering a game-stopper issue (in that pregnancy at least).
@rachelredhead I like the shefit ones. They are pricy but I love the adjustability. I’m a ddd not pregnant. I’m also super short, so it’s nice to adjust the straps just to my size.
**TW Loss/pregnancy mentioned** Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 5/30/16 and MC on 7/6/16 BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17 BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19 BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19 BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2 Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage IVF started Feb 2020 retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal. Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
Mommy to a super cute havanesse puppy and baby boy!
@KatieEl@littlebug2010 thanks! I’ll look at both brands. I’m super short, too, so the boob struggle is real. Hard to find good support with the right length shoulder straps so I appreciate adjustable ones.
So I just had my first appointment and it was underwhelming to say the least. H came with me and they almost didn't do the "what to expect" chat/consultation because... they were running late maybe? I'm still not sure but they were just going to draw blood/take vitals/do a Pap which was not what was said to me before the appointment. Also, I found out today that not only do they not deliver (which I figured) but they don't do ultrasounds in their office either and I have to go to a hard to park area downtown to get them. Generally I was turned off by the whole experience as the doctor (not my normal gyno who apparently doesn't do the pregnant patients which was news to me) was dismissive/not great. Also, H didn't like that they didn't explain before they did an internal exam to see where my uterus was/was very turned off by that (I had an idea of what they were going to do).
So I feel like I should change doctors but I'm nervous to do so ("devil you know" etc etc). Has anyone changed OBGYNs post being pregnant? Is it hard? Am I overreacting? Any other Philly folks in here have a doctor rec?
@pocketrose oh no!! That sounds awful, I would be upset too. I had a small freak out when first deciding what to do when I got my BFPs - I knew the next step was "call your doctor" but u was afraid if I just called my obgyn office, I'd be locked in there, and I didn't know if that's what I wanted. (How am I supposed to make a decision about delivery when I just found out I was probably pregnant?! I have since calmed down about this) my gyno is there and I love her, but she doesn't do the OB part either. Anyway, I talked to my one friend who I talk about this stuff with and she said it's no big deal at all to switch, that it's very common to start one place and finish somewhere else. That calmed my crazy brain down a bit and I'm currently proceeding with my original office.
All that aside, you should feel confident and comfortable with your care, and if you don't feel that way right now, I think you're totally justified to shop around. This stuff is a big deal and it matters that you feel good about your team.
FWIW I lived outside Philly for a while and think Bryn Mawr Hospital/Main Line Health is great. I have two friends who have delivered there, one of whom is also a nurse on staff (I think she's in the NICU actually). Probably not the best option if you're downtown or any direction out if downtown other than west....but figured I'd throw it out there 🙂
@mehugg Thanks for this. I’m actually pretty between bryn mawr and center city (nw philly) but I think my insurance doesn’t cover bryn mawr/main line systems (BUT I’m on the exchange so I can maybe change that? TBD)
@pocketrose My advice is to trust your gut, and if it makes you feel better to interview another Ob or two, go for it.
I’m not sure how hard it is in Philly to get a good Ob vs what it’s like here in NYC, but 2 things I learned the hard way when I tried to interview OBs with my son were 1) do it EARLY! Once all the IVF ladies (like me) are released from their REs, many doctors were already full. I’d make calls ASAP. 2) don’t tell them you’re shopping around. I did, and several then refused to even see me. Good luck!
Re: The Great Question Thread
DS2: Jan. 2016
DS3: Dec. 2017
Baby #4 on the way!
DS2: Jan. 2016
DS3: Dec. 2017
Baby #4 on the way!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
I know it it huge range....but my mom and her aunt had fraternal twins, I am older (almost 38) and I am overweight. Those are 3 things that increase chances for twins.
Nurse was surprised how high but says she's seen women triple or quadruple with just one.
So, I am curious?
Long story short, u/s and NIPT will help determine if any of those are a factor for either of us.
Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17
BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19
BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19
BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2
Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage
IVF started Feb 2020
retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal.
Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
I will be 38 when my second baby is born (birthday next month) and I was 35 when my son was born(pregnant at 34 but they base it on age you will be when baby is born). There was no difference in my care. I had one OB/GYN laughed and roll her eyes about "ama". She pulled out pen and paper and explained why 35 is considered the age of "high risk". It is because at age 35, IF there is an amniocentesis, there is higher risk than benefit. She said if you're healthy, etc there is no concern and that some 35+ people are healthier than some younger people. I saw midwives for my pregnancy. One bonus was my insurance covered 100% any DNA testing, quad markers etc should I want it (& we did because I would want to be prepared if something was wrong).
I do believe, from friends who were 40+ when they had babies, they are truly a bit more high risk and are monitored more closely. I have friends who had babies at age 43, one at 45 and met a lady recently who had a baby at 46! My best friend's mom is from another country and said "Only in America are we so concerned with older moms". My grandma had my dad in 1940 when she was 40 (his dad was 50).
Here is some good reads, video is lighthearted but factual:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YIz9jZPzvo
https://www.goodmorningamerica.com/wellness/story/doctors-call-meghan-markles-pregnancy-37-geriatric-58612017
edited because I couldn't remember how old in 2018
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
That said, I do have a platelet disorder, and given how last pregnancy unfolded, if I graduate to the OB this time it needs to be a high risk practice. (But not bc of age).
I went to the gym over lunch and jeeeeeeeez my sports bra nearly killed me. Any recommendations on sports bras for the well-endowed? I was a DD before pregnancy and now it’s just...madness. And I’m assuming this is only the beginning.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
I also did the MaterniT21 blood test. Bc I had done a FET with a PGS tested embryo and we had also done genetic screening before IVF, we didn’t do any further tests.
My Ob felt that the odds of spontaneous m/c from an amnio was about equal to odds of discovering a game-stopper issue (in that pregnancy at least).
DS2: Jan. 2016
DS3: Dec. 2017
Baby #4 on the way!
Married: 7/21/12
BFP: 12/4/16 Due 8/8/17 -- Its a boy! Born 8/14/17
BFP: 5/19/19 and MC on 5/27/19
BFP: 6/24/19, MC on 7/24/19
BFP: 10/24, no heartbeat on 11/27, D&C 12/2
Officially diagnosed with Secondary infertility and recurrent miscarriage
IVF started Feb 2020
retrieval and PGT testing: 18 retrieved, 17 mature, 16 fertilized, 9 to blast, 8 PGT normal.
Transfer #1: June 14, 2020
So I just had my first appointment and it was underwhelming to say the least. H came with me and they almost didn't do the "what to expect" chat/consultation because... they were running late maybe? I'm still not sure but they were just going to draw blood/take vitals/do a Pap which was not what was said to me before the appointment. Also, I found out today that not only do they not deliver (which I figured) but they don't do ultrasounds in their office either and I have to go to a hard to park area downtown to get them. Generally I was turned off by the whole experience as the doctor (not my normal gyno who apparently doesn't do the pregnant patients which was news to me) was dismissive/not great. Also, H didn't like that they didn't explain before they did an internal exam to see where my uterus was/was very turned off by that (I had an idea of what they were going to do).
So I feel like I should change doctors but I'm nervous to do so ("devil you know" etc etc). Has anyone changed OBGYNs post being pregnant? Is it hard? Am I overreacting? Any other Philly folks in here have a doctor rec?
All that aside, you should feel confident and comfortable with your care, and if you don't feel that way right now, I think you're totally justified to shop around. This stuff is a big deal and it matters that you feel good about your team.
FWIW I lived outside Philly for a while and think Bryn Mawr Hospital/Main Line Health is great. I have two friends who have delivered there, one of whom is also a nurse on staff (I think she's in the NICU actually). Probably not the best option if you're downtown or any direction out if downtown other than west....but figured I'd throw it out there 🙂
Good luck!