PGAL Check-In 11/11

shamrocandroll · November 2019

Hey, don't mind me. Just starting up one of our super boring weekly check-in threads. 🙃

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/ry/wmdju05awsu0.gif

This thread is for those who are pregnant after a previous loss (or losses)

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?

2. Previous loss(es)?

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?

4. Any appointment updates?

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?

6. Any milestones coming up?

pirateduck · November 2019

@shamrocandroll I am here to participate and add a GTKY to the thread! Thank you for always starting.

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
Currently 13 + 5, Due May 13, FTM

2. Previous loss(es)?
CP April 2016, BO July 2019

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
like crap, I've been crying a lot, this lack of sleep is killing me (physically and emotionally), I've been having lots of headaches lately, probably from the lack of sleep, fun times

4. Any appointment updates?
first Centering appointment this week

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
STILL WAITING for my NIPT results from 11 days ago!

6. Any milestones coming up?
Nope.

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
Mildred and Dora (both of which used to be highly popular apparently, but now are unheard of and I'm not trying to bring back the trend)

shamrocandroll · November 2019

@pirateduck Ah, yes. Now I remember you guys suggested that, but I copy/pasted from last week where we didn't do one. Really sorry you're not sleeping. I hope you find some rest soon. And you get you NIPT results back soon!

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
14 + 4, Due May 7, DS turns 3 TODAY!!!

2. Previous loss(es)?
MMC Nov '18, early loss Feb '19

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Emotionally a little all over the place, but that's pregnancy, I guess. Physically I feel great. Just more tired than usual.

4. Any appointment updates?
Nope

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
We had an awesome birthday party for DS, but the weekend with the in-laws was..... challenging. My sister didn't end up stayig with us, so the in-laws did. I could go on for a while, so I'll just say that MH drank WAY too much with his brother (who is the worst influence on him) and after I "went to bed" (aka didn't want to hang out with my drunk ILs anymore) they kept me awake until after midnight with their noise and did all kids of stupid shit, which my MIL reveled in telling me all about the next morning to see my reaction. So MH is big time in the dog house right now and he knows it. I'm sick of him acting like an irresponsible college undergrad at a frat party when his brother visits when he is in fact 39 years old and responsible for NOT destroying our house or himself when he's having beers with his brother. All while my MIL and FIL egged them on and laughed, I'm sure. So done with having them stay at my house, and there will be a no drinking clause if they feel like staying here again anytime soon.

6. Any milestones coming up?
Passed all of them!

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
All of them? Haha I used my dad's name (James) as a middle name for DS, but I'm not really interested in reusing any family names as first names.

ruby696 · November 2019

@shamrocandroll I'm glad the party was great, but I'm sorry you got stuck with your in-laws. I'm sure your mom was thrilled. Sorry for the drama though.

@pirateduck 11 days seems like a long time. I had my Panorama results with DD and the twins at 8 business days. Can you call your doctor and check in?

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
13+4/May 14th/TTM and FTM

2. Previous loss(es)?
3 MMC's and 3 CP's

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Emotionally I'm doing pretty well. I credit my doppler 100% for that. Physically, I feel like garbage unless I'm constantly eating. I am seriously up to two breakfasts in the morning before work now. Still tired and up all night peeing.

4. Any appointment updates?
My first appt with my new OB is on Friday.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
My kids have been waking up so early and it's killing me.

6. Any milestones coming up?
Nope, passed them all.

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
Richard. We have a few of them and while it seems normal as their name, I don't like it at all.

pirateduck · November 2019

@shamrocandroll I'm sorry you had a stressful visit with the family! This sounds like my brother and sister's influence on me! Haha. I virtually never drink but when the three of us get together it's a freakin disaster and a half and we stay up well past my usual bedtime. I am 38 and my brother is 37, I'm not sure we're outgrowing it any time soon, hate to break it to ya! It's stressful to have house guests for sure, when the party is at someone else's house, at least you have the option to leave.

So I sent a message to my doctor on the portal asking about the results and they called me within 5 minutes and had them! All normal EXCEPT apparently I am an SMA carrier. They want to test my husband to see if he is a carrier and IF he is also a carrier then there is a 1 in 4 chance the baby can have it, if he's not a carrier than no drama as it's a recessive gene, so even if we're both carriers, most likely all is well.

splashmountain · November 2019

@pirateduck I haven't been sleeping well either and getting headaches because of it. Hopefully you get your results soon, that seems like a long wait!

@shamrocandroll Happy birthday to your ugh, your weekend sounds awful, but I'm glad you had a great birthday party for your S.

@ruby696 lol I eat one breakfast before work and one at my desk, I feel you!

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
13+4, 5/20, 1 DS

2. Previous loss(es)? 2016 and 2018

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? I'm struggling with sleep, my nausea just won't quit and I started having some diarrhea, google wasn't nice so I called my doctor and he thinks it's because my diet changed (I started eating meat again) and told me to eat bland foods for a few days and see what happens. Fine with me, I love mashed potatos and bread lol.
Emotionally I'm anxious for some reason. I haven't seen the baby since 10/23 and even though I'm passed my loss milestones, I can't shake the feeling that something is going to go wrong.

4. Any appointment updates? 11/25 for my ob appointment. No u/s unless they can't find the heartbeat with the doppler again.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? My birthday was last week and H told me he made me an appointment for Saturday and I needed to be ready to leave by 2:30. That's it, no other details. It ended up being a pregnancy massage at a near by spa. It was wonderful!

6. Any milestones coming up? None

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
My dad's a Larry...nope. And my husband keeps bringing up his great grandmother's name, which I don't hate, I just don't like, Carmen.

pirateduck · November 2019

@splashmountain funnily enough I know a woman named Larry, she was named after her father!

splashmountain · November 2019

@pirateduck yikes! That poor girl!

pirateduck · November 2019

@splashmountain She acts all tough and proud of it now, but I can't help but wonder if she was always so fond of being called Larry

ruby696 · November 2019

@splashmountain Mmmm.... carbs. Seriously though, I hope you start feeling better soon.

Austenista · November 2019

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
14 weeks today! Yay second tri!/May11th/2x boy mom.

2. Previous loss(es)?
CP July ‘12, MMC Feb ‘19

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
A lot better actually. Everything you describe @pirateduck I was dealing with last week. I was crying so much.

4. Any appointment updates?
I heard back from our Panorama and everything looks good. We are now team pink for the first time. Super excited about that.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
@shamrocandroll I just want to say I really appreciate your efforts to keep the board active and organized. These aren’t boring to me at all.

6. Any milestones coming up?
Happy to be past all of them. My PGAL brain finds new ways to stress over every detail. But everything is pointing to a healthy baby and I’m so excited.

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
I tend to favor older names. But I had some aunts named Eula and Bobby Jean and those probably won’t see any use from me.

splashmountain · November 2019

Thanks @ruby696 I do love carbs! Lol

@Austenista lol Eula. Now why wouldn't you want a fancy name like that hahaha

pirateduck · November 2019

Thank you @Austenista today I actually woke up feeling better than when I went to bed, I actually mostly slept last night. In an effort to try and stay feeling good I immediately drank a bunch of water and I ate some oatmeal earlier than normal. We’ll see how I feel in a few hours. Fingers crossed. Second tri is supposed to be better right? I start second tri this week too, so hoping for the best.

m6agua · November 2019

@shamrocandroll I appreciate you starting up this thread and helping keep things organized! I promise I will help more soon, work is still a bit crazy here. I'm hoping after this week things will calm down. Happy belated birthday to your LO! I'm sorry there was so much shenanigans from you H and the in-laws! I hope he redeems himself.

@pirateduck I'm sorry you haven't been getting good sleep. I'm glad everything came back normal!

@ruby696 I really need to get a doppler! I borrowed one from my friend last time, but we haven't told anyone so I cannot ask to borrow it again yet.

@splashmountain That is so sweet of YH to book you a surprise massage. I hope you start feeling better soon

@Austenista That is so exciting that you get to be team pink this time around!

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
Currently 13 + 5, Due May 14, DD is 3 next week!

2. Previous loss(es)?
BO/MMC Nov 2015

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Physically I'm feeling good, which as always leaves me emotionally anxious. I remember now from DD's pregnancy that this is the time frame that sucks, because symptoms go away, appointments are spread out and you don't feel movement yet. I'm trying to stay calm.

4. Any appointment updates?
I got my thyroid labs drawn yesterday and see the endocrinologist on Friday. I'm really interested to see how this will go since I've had some symptoms coming back in. I wonder if they will put me on a low dose.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
I am ALMOST done with this major work project. I'm hoping to hand it off today or tomorrow. I also have Friday off so I can prep for DD's birthday party this Sunday. We are telling everyone at the party... finally!

6. Any milestones coming up?
I passed my mc date, which was November 8. The day wasn't too hard, mainly because I was so tapped out from life and work that I didn't even have time to think about it. No more milestones now.

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child?
Realistically all of them because we don't want to duplicate any of our immediate family or aunts/uncles/cousins either. No ones name really sticks out as being too awful though. I mean some of them are dated, but not terrible. I do plan on using DH's name (also my dads middle name) as the middle name if we have a boy.

splashmountain · November 2019

@m6agua we used H's name as DS's middle name. I told H we could make him a junior, but he liked this way better (and so did I). Hoping your labs are ok and they can figure out what's going on with your symptoms. Good luck finishing up the project and getting everything for DD's birthday party and your reveal 😊

shamrocandroll · November 2019

@ruby696 I'm not usually a big breakfast person, so I've been having a hard time adjusting to actually trying to eat a big breakfast in the mornings. You must need two since you're making two babies in there!

@splashmountain Thank you! Sorry about the stomach issues. I've been all about mashed potatoes this pregnancy too! I can also really relate to your comment about feeling anxious even with no real reason. I hope we both start to feel more joy soon.

@Austenista Thank you. I probably took some of the comments a little too personally, since for a while I felt like I was the only one creating any threads and it was a lot to keep up with only to find out people didn't really like them. But I'm mostly over it now.

@m6agua No worries, I am definitely NOT referring to you ladies when I make snarky remarks about starting threads! You're all great, so I felt safe making a little jab here.

pirateduck · November 2019

@m6agua if we have a boy husband's first name will be the boy's middle name as well. My husband's middle name is also a family name, so it's the way it's supposed to be done. We don't have a lot of traditions and this seems like an easy one to uphold.

emlettuce · November 2019

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 15+3/May 3rd/1 DS

2. Previous loss(es)? MMC April 19

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? It's been a few weeks since I've posted on here but I am feeling so much better physically, I really thought the morning sickness was going to hang on forever. Emotionally its complicated and I'll talk about that in the milestones

4. Any appointment updates? Had a regular visit yesterday and the heartbeat sounded beautiful but my initial blood pressure reading was high so they took it again at the end of the appointment and it was much better but since I have a history of preeclampsia so they want me to a 24 hour urine sample before my next appointment

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? DS had a meltdown this morning over having to wear a winter coat. I pity the teacher who has to put it back on him for recess and to go home. Also there were two baby mice just chilling in my kitchen sink this morning.

6. Any milestones coming up? Friday is my empty due date and I'm really struggling with if/how I want to publicly acknowledge it. So far I've been very private with my loss so doing anything just seems so out of nowhere. And I'm also feeling a lot of guilt because I know that if I wasn't pregnant right now the day would be so much harder. I don't know, it's all such a jumble.

ETA the GTKY

7. GTKY: What's a family name (your family and/or your partner's) that you would NEVER name your child? There aren't really any naming traditions on either side of our families but sorry Grammy, Florence isn't happening.

m6agua · November 2019

@emlettuce I understand how you feel completely. With DDs pregnancy I was around 15 weeks when my empty due date came and it was hard dealing with all of the conflicting emotions. *Hugs*

pirateduck · November 2019

@emlettuce however you feel is ok to feel and however you deal with it is ok too. It's all confusing. Sending hugs.

shamrocandroll · November 2019

@emlettuce Empty due dates are so hard. I chose not to publicly acknowledge mine, but I am a pretty private person in general. I also feared people saying things that would make it worse, so I chose to mourn them privately. I may decide to share about our losses if/when we do a public announcement. Everyone is different with the way they mourn, but just know there's no right or wrong way to do it. Hugs!

ruby696 · November 2019

@emlettuce I understand the conflict when your loss isn't really public knowledge. My losses aren't either, so everyone thinks I worry for no reason. It seems odd to correct them now. I hope you get through Friday okay. Just know it's okay to be happy and sad at the same time. ❤❤

emlettuce · November 2019

@m6agua @pirateduck @shamrocandroll @ruby696 Thank you all for being so kind and lovely. I have so many feeling about today so I wrote something to try and sort them all out. It might be a bit of a vanity post so feel free to skip but I wanted to share it.

I loved you every moment I knew you

And you,

I was all you knew.

We only had a few weeks together

And the only heartbeat was my own.

Today is the day we should have met

And I often think of where we should be.

I think about the empty bedroom.

The "middle room" we call it,

When it should be the nursery.

I think about my arms.

They feel all wrong today.

Too light.

Missing the weight of a newborn,

Eight pounds resting against my chest.

Then there is my stomach,

I think of how much we should have grown.

Together, we should have grown.

But we didn't.

Today is not the day I wanted it to be.

Today is empty.

But my arms are not.

They hold your brother tightly.

And my stomach

Is holding someone new.

The empty bedroom

Will claim is rightful name.

Today is empty.

But my heart is not.

It is full of them.

It is full of you.

We are not where we should be today.

Many things have changed since you were lost

But here are the things I want you to know:

You are missed.

You are loved.

You are not replaced.

You are missed.

You are loved.

You are not replaced.

Repeat them constantly.

Like a heartbeat.

My heartbeat.

shamrocandroll · November 2019

@emlettuce That is beautiful. 😭 ♥

splashmountain · November 2019

@emlettuce that was beautiful. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time right now, empty due dates are terrible. Sending you hugs!

Want a personalized experience?

PGAL Check-In 11/11

Re: PGAL Check-In 11/11

Choose Another Board

Search Boards