PGAL Check-In 10/28

shamrocandroll · October 2019

This thread is for those who are pregnant after a previous loss (or losses)

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?

2. Previous loss(es)?

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?

4. Any appointment updates?

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?

6. Any milestones coming up?

rachelg777 · October 2019

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 11+4, 5/14, 1 DS

2. Previous loss(es)? MMC at 11 weeks prior to DS

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? My nausea has kind of ramped up again but otherwise not too bad. Emotionally I'm feeling good. I've passed all my milestones now and as long as everything looks good at our US on Wednesday I will probably start letting the cat out of the bag.

4. Any appointment updates? Nope next appointment is Wednesday

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? My rant is that DS is working on a couple more molars so was up from 12-3 last night and I'm zonked today. My rave is that we bought our plane tickets to visit my family for Christmas last night. We will only be there a few days but I hardly ever get to see all my nieces and nephews so I'm so excited.

6. Any milestones coming up? Nope!

m6agua · October 2019

@rachelg777 Boo for crappy sleep. Ugh, the molars were the worst for DD. Yay for getting to visit family this holiday season!

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 11+4, 5/14, 1 DD

2. Previous loss(es)? MMC/BO in 2015

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Pretty good physically. I noticed this weekend if I stay on my feet all day my pelvis/hips get a bit sore. Emotionally I am just anxious to confirm baby is still growing tomorrow.

4. Any appointment updates? 12 week appointment tomorrow morning, will either get the doppler or bedside ultrasound. I also have to get my thyroid labs drawn today.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? We had such a great weekend. H actually had off on Sunday and we went to the pumpkin patch and then watched the Packers win last night!

6. Any milestones coming up? My gestational milestone is already passed. Just the actual calendar dates coming up on October 31 (the day I started spotting) and November 8 (the day of my loss). I think if tomorrows appointment goes well I will be less anxious about these dates.

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@shamrocandroll I think @pirateduck mentioned it the week you had vacation, but we would like to add a GTKY on this thread if that’s cool. 😊

@rachelg777 yay for plane tickets for Christmas! That sounds so fun. Sorry DS kept you up last night. Teething is the worst.

@m6agua sounds like a good weekend. Hoping you have a great appointment tomorrow.

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?

11+2 / 16 May / DSx2

2. Previous loss(es)?
MC/CPx2

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Physically? Like crap at the moment. I’ve been sick twice and am holding off on the meds until I’m sure they will stay down. But really I can’t complain. Emotionally? I have my appointment today so I have a bit of anxiety. I just want to hear the heartbeat and know everything is still okay. Realistically I know flutters and kicks aren’t that far off.

4. Any appointment updates?

Today at 11–intake appointment for a pap and such, all the bloodwork, and the NIPT bloodwork so I really should eat something before I give blood. MH took off to go and he’s going to pick up my 4 year old a little early because he really wants to see or hear the baby.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?

Not now. Maybe later? 🤣

6. Any milestones coming up?
not until my empty DD in January. We’ve past all the other ones.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@mdfarmchick Sure, that's cool. Anyone else wanna sign up to post this thread weekly? I have so many I'm posting weekly and I'm running out of GTKY ideas!

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@shamrocandroll I can post it but it will be a little later in the day because I’m on the west coast. Anyone on the east coast? Or is everyone okay with a slow roll on Monday’s?

GTKY: What’s one impractical thing you spurge on for yourself?

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I'm cool with it being a slow roll. I feel like I participate in so many Monday threads that I just end up repeating myself a lot anyway. If anyone else wants it earlier, they can always post it too!

pirateduck · October 2019

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?
12 weeks/due May 11/no children

2. Previous loss(es)?
2017 CP, July 2019 BO/MC at 9 weeks

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Pretty good overall. Nighttime indigestion seems a bit better. My neck is not doing good today. My last progesterone dose was last Wednesday. When I had my MC I started bleeding exactly 1 week after stopping the progesterone, so that makes me a little nervous when I think about it, but I will have my scan at that time so I'll be able to see that all is well.

4. Any appointment updates?
NT scan this week.

5. Rants/Raves/Questions?
At my appointment last week, after sticking me in both arms, the nurse did not get enough blood for ALL the tests. I'm not sure which ones they were able to run and which ones they didn't (plan to get the rest of the blood this week anyway), but I suspect NIPT was one that got stuck on the back burner and I'll have to wait yet another week+ for results!

6. Any milestones coming up?
No.

7. GTKY: What’s one impractical thing you spurge on for yourself?
My husband and I probably go out to dinner once a week. Also my hobbies aren't exactly economical, but they keep me sane and are what I live for

What's the point of working 40 hours a week and earning a pay check if not to improve you quality of life in some way?

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@rachelg777 I hope your appointment on Wednesday looks great and you can breathe a sign of relief!

@m6agua Eeek, good luck tomorrow! I'll be thinking of you and hoping for all good news!

@mdfarmchick I hope you have a wonderful appointment today and get to see/hear that sweet lil heartbeat!

@pirateduck Past loss experiences really can mess with our minds, can't they!? Hoping that coming off the progesterone goes much smoother this time around!

1. Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 12+4 / May 7 / 1 DS turning 3 in 2 weeks.

2. Previous loss(es)? MMC in Nov '18, early loss Feb '19

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Great! 12w scan last week went great, no sign of SCH, and Harmony results came back normal! The sex results are currently sitting in my online portal inbox, and I'm dyyyying to open them, but have to wait until tonight.

4. Any appointment updates? Nothing until 12/12 at this point! Which seems SO far away!

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? We're having DS's birthday party the weekend after next and I'm looking forward to it. Most of our family will be here, so we'll likely tell them all at some point (not at the party itself). I think we might tell DS this week, but then we risk everyone who talks to him finding out before our family.

6. Any milestones coming up? I just realized I was so distracted by recent events that I totally missed my second empty due date earlier this month. I'm feeling slightly guilty about that, even though it's good I kept my mind off it. But that means my loss milestones are over, except for the anniversaries of the losses themselves. First one is next month, right before Thanksgiving, but hopefully this silver lining helps me through it.

7. GTKY: What’s one impractical thing you spurge on for yourself? I would have said wine before, but now... I guess just mostly random pregnancy cravings like Zebra Cakes.

pirateduck · October 2019

@shamrocandroll zebra cakes sound sooooo good right now. I have such a sweet tooth. I definitely cave to all my cravings these days. I'm glad you got your Harmony results and all is well!

It seems like a lot of us have appointments this week. I hope to hear good news from everyone!

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@pirateduck I really wanted the Christmas tree cakes, but since it's only October, I had to settle for Zebra cakes. The craving came out of NOWHERE and was so random!

rachelg777 · October 2019

@m6agua I've noticed the same but more so pelvis/lower back for me. Glad you had such an awesome weekend!

@mdfarmchick How did your appointment go? Hope you got some relief after your meds.

@pirateduck Ugh I'm sorry about the blood draw mishap. Last time mine mine had a lab error for the NIPT and we had to redraw- somehow the extra waiting is more painful. Hope it goes quickly!

@shamrocandroll eeek I can't wait for you to find out!! And at least zebra cakes are a relatively cheap splurge lol!

mdfarmchick · October 2019

TW**Loss

I’m going to miss all of you. I hope everyone here has a healthy baby at the end of this. Unfortunately there was no heartbeat this morning. Baby measured on track so we don’t know what happened. We may never know. My four year old really wants to name the baby though. Anyway I’m sorry if this is rambling and crap. ♥️

ruby696 · October 2019

Oh no @mdfarmchick, I am so incredibly sorry. That is absolutely heartbreaking and I am really going to miss you. Please be gentle with yourself. ❤

pirateduck · October 2019

Oh no @mdfarmchick I was not expecting to hear this! This is terrible news. Sending hugs. I hope your heart can heal. I hope you can work through this with your 4 year old as well.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@mdfarmchick Nooooo, I am so so sorry! You're one of my favorite people on here, and I am so sad to see you go. I'm deeply sorry for your loss.

rachelg777 · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I’m so sorry. Do you know yet what your options are for miscarrying? I know it’s not for everyone but I am glad I had a D&C with testing so I could know what happened. Good luck with whatever you decide and again I am so so sorry.

queenklau · October 2019

@mdfarmchick, I am so so very sorry. I hope that you get to heal in time.

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@rachelg777 a D&E apparently ((he said we are a little too far along for just a D&C)). I asked if we could do testing, and he said he would check my insurance. I told him I’d really just like to know boy or girl because I want this baby to have a name. ♥️

queenklau · October 2019

@mdfarmchick, knowing the sex did provide some healing for my losses. I did genetic testing both times and the first was inconclusive, but the second ended up being turners syndrome. It was somewhat a relief knowing the second time.

rachelg777 · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I hope insurance makes that as smooth as possible for you, I love the idea of naming him/her. Best of luck with the healing process and I hope the surgery goes smoothly. Hugs!

soprano19 · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I hope you get the answers you need in order to heal.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I know you probably want this to be over with, but have they talked about confirming with another ultrasound? The fact that you're measuring on track would just make me really want to be 1000% sure there was no heartbeat. Ugh, this is the worst and I'm so so sorry.

m6agua · October 2019

I am wondering if with the start of November we want to start a few new threads. I hate for mdfarmchick to keep getting the notifications from several of the posts she recently started.

Baby Car Thread, Bump In the Night, Maternity Clothes, at least those are the ones that could go on and on, but are still fairly new that we could replace them.

Stella_700 did the Product Spotlight for Car Seats, but I don't really know if restarting that one is a good idea.

I mostly ignore my notifications myself, so I guess we can wait a bit and figure it out too.

ruby696 · October 2019

@m6agua I think that's a great idea. Especially since we're so close to November

pirateduck · October 2019

I don't know... is there a way to choose not to get notifications on The Bump? It isn't exactly user friendly to try and figure some of this stuff out. I've been ignoring mine as well. I now have 766 notifications, which means nothing to me because now there are too many to sift through, some from past BMBs that I don't know how to unsubscribe from. Also is there a way to see the date/time something was posted? Sometimes I look at other boards and I can't figure out if posts are active or even from this year?!? I hate to post a new comment or question on a dead thread. Are we being overly sensitive starting new threads? I dunno, with my loss I just didn't look at things I didn't want to look at. I'm not sure it's that big a deal, but that's just me.

ruby696 · October 2019

@pirateduck I think if someone can't be bothered to see if they're posting on a current thread, then that's their problem. It's certainly less effort for us to be extra sensitive towards someone during a devastating time their life than it would be to make a loss mom try to figure out how to unsubscribe from notifications. Lots of loss moms go over to the miscarriage or TTCAL boards and see the notification pop up while they're logged in - it's not just a matter of not paying attention to notifications you've never seen.

I guess I just don't understand why we wouldn't start new threads, since we start new weekly or monthly threads on just about every other topic and everyone figures it out just fine?

pirateduck · October 2019

@ruby696 please tell me how I can see if I'm posting in a current thread. I have NEVER been able to figure this out on The Bump. If I am on message boards that are not my BMB, like over in the first trimester section, where does it show the date something is posted? If I have to change something in my settings to see this, I will gladly do so!

I guess my thought with other threads started by people who may no longer be in this BMB is that it's easier for one person to unsubscribe from notifications than for the other 50-100 following the thread to find a new one... but I guess whoever makes the new thread can hopefully link it in a post on the old one.

mokay19 · October 2019

I think we should restart those few. We can ask BumpAdmin to close the other ones. That way people can still read the info but can’t add to it anymore.

Also, I don’t think it’s possible to be overly sensitive when someone just lost a child. Especially since it is incredibly easy to start new threads.

I’ve had it happen to me before and I hated it. It made going on TB at all more difficult than I wanted it to be.

Also, @pirateduck under the name of every thread has the date that it was started. And even before you open it, it tells you when the latest comment was made.

ruby696 · October 2019

@pirateduck Yes, what @mokay19 said. The date it was started and the most recent post should be right on the main feed. It might be easier to see on desktop. I'm not sure about mobile.

mokay19 · October 2019

I’m only on mobile so I can confirm that the dates are visible on mobile.

pirateduck · October 2019

@mokay19 so if it doesn't have a year it's this year? and if there is a year listed it's older? I was just looking at other threads and noticed the dates aren't all the same format... like some things will just have a time, some will just have a month/day, some will just have a year/month. This is making a bit more sense. I'm also looking at what you just posted and it says 10:08AM under your name, so I'm assuming (now that it's real time) that it means you posted at 10:08AM today, but if I were to look at this post next week it would have a Month/Day instead.

ugh... I kinda feel like an idiot but it's sooooo different to the other message board I've been using for years, where under a user's name it dates how long they have been a member and very clearly on each post it says posted XXX and has a date time right there and very obvious.

m6agua · October 2019

@pirateduck It will have the exact time if it is from today. It will have a date (i.e. Oct 28) for anything that is previous to today. It will have a Month/Year (Oct 2018) for anything from a previous year. Or at least I believe that is how it goes.

@mokay19 I think asking TB to close some threads is a good idea!

I was thinking we could do the threads like this:
New Vehicle Thread 2.0 (since this one we probably will want to keep it as one long thread)
Bump In the Night: Nov-Jan (We could do this one in 2 or 3 month increments)
Maternity Clothes: Winter (we can start a new one with a new season)

I will be wiling to post them, but after my appointment on Friday morning if it goes well. I really think it will, I have a gut feeling everything is fine and it is just my anatomy and too early to see or hear right now.

Edited: Formating

pirateduck · October 2019

oh @m6agua just a thought...

"Maternity Clothes: Winter (we can start a new one with a new season)"

Maybe post 4 threads, one for each season at the same time? We don't all live in the same part of the world and aren't all in the same season at the same time, but I do like where you are going with this!

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@shamrocandroll I know that he’s positive but I’m going to ask for another ultrasound for my peace of mind.

@ everyone else thank you for being sensitive to me and I do appreciate it. I don’t know if it’s going to bother me or not. I hope no one minds if I lurk a little just because I want to check and make sure everyone is doing okay. Right now notifications that pop up are something I can ignore. And I’ll probably take a mental health break shortly. I do absolutely appreciate you all thinking of me and my feelings. ♥️ ((creepy internet hugs))

m6agua · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I'm glad you are asking for another ultrasound just to double check. (hugs)

ieles2531 · October 2019

@mdfarmchick if you’re still looking for ways to explain to your 4 year old, check out the books “something happened” and “we were going to have a baby but had an angel instead”. These both helped tremendously with my 4 yo when we lost our baby earlier this year.

Thanks everyone one for your advice last week. We just spent 5 days completely unplugged in the mountains...after the one episode DD is fine. She saw pictures of her best friend’s new baby born Friday and didn’t freak out or anything.

m6agua · November 2019

Looks like @shamrocandroll posted a new Bump in the Night thread. I just posted a new Maternity clothes one, I went with going by trimester, I feel like that will be the most inclusive. I will probably post a new vehicle one later today.

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