June 2020 Moms

October Second-Time Mom + (STM+) Check-In!

2

Re: October Second-Time Mom + (STM+) Check-In!

  • @julzy my nausea is way earlier (and way worse) but I'm not sure I tell a difference in exhaustion. Ds is 10 months and still up twice a night for bottles. I think tired is just my life now. Also had spotting this time which I never had before. I ended up getting an ultrasound at 6+3 instead of 8 because of it. 
  • EDD/Weeks + Days: Not sure! I think about 5.5 weeks

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? Two boys, 5 & 2

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Well! The 2 y/o has no clue what’s going on but we told our 5 y/o last night and he was excited! He asked when his baby sister will be here ha. I’ve told him so many times it doesn’t work like that but he insists it’s going to be a girl so we’ll see!

    Any questions/concerns? I mentioned this in my intro, but I’m concerned about my recent gallbladder issues and what that means for this pregnancy. 

    I know we're all super early on, but I'm curious if anyone is already having different or similar symptoms/experience this time around?  Exhaustion has set in (the same as previous pregnancies) but no nausea yet. I had pretty bad nausea last two times so maybe my body will take it easier on me since I have to deal with my gallbladder. Only time will tell! Oh, my boobs have been SO sore and heavy feeling this time. It’s what made me take a test. Don’t remember that feeling the last times.
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  • 6 weeks! DD is 22 months old. She’s going through a sleep regression where she has woken up every. single. night for a month. Hubby and I take turns every night and end up co-sleeping with her in our guest room so we’re  both constantly exhausted. And of course I’m double exhausted now that I’m pregnant.

    On symptoms, I didn’t have the sore boobs last time! Ouch!!! I feel like I have more fatigue and need to have small snacks this time around too to keep nausea at bay, which I didn’t have last time. 
  • Are there any breastfeeding mamas in here?  Did your baby self-wean or did you wean them at some point?  

    My long term breastfeeding goals were to get her to 2 years or when she self-weaned, whichever came first.  She’ll be 2 at the end of the month and like @julzy said it is becoming increasingly uncomfortable every time she latches.  She mostly just nurses before nap and bed time at this point, but still occasionally wants it in between.  I think before I got pregnant I probably would have ignored my original goal and just continued nursing for a while because officially weaning makes me a little sad.  😢 Now though, I’m increasingly ready to just be done!
  • @kberm3 I'm still nursing both of mine- they're 3 and 13 months. I nursed the older one all through my second pregnancy, but planning on weaning him by third trimester. I dried up around 14 or 15 weeks last time, so I don't know if either of them will choose to keep nursing after that. Drying up was how I managed to night wean my oldest. He was always super attached, though we're down to only once per day now and I get to pick length of session.

    My younger one just isn't at attached, she may choose to just wean when I dry up, but at the very least we'll night wean during second trimester either way. And I'll start putting in limits so I can choose when to end her sessions too, at least a month or two before baby arrives.

    I struggle with major discomfort and aversion to older one now, and struggled with it very strongly most of my last pregnancy. Not having those same feelings with younger one yet.

    I don't blame you at all for weaning sooner rather than later. There is no wrong time, and your comfort does matter!
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @pourmeanothermocktail I’m so torn about it!  I had strong breastfeeding goals, but I never envisioned myself going past 2 years.  The closer we’ve gotten to her actually being two though the more I’ve felt myself struggling with the decision.  I don’t want to wean her if she isn’t ready.  I love the bond.  It just feels really uncomfortable right now having her latching and pinching.  😩  If I could use this to at least get her night weaned that would be fantastic!!  I should have clarified that when I say she nurses before bedtime that really means she nurses off and on all night long.  We’ve coslept since she was around 9 months because she’s super attached at night and I needed sleep.  Before I was pregnant the latching during the night was mostly a non-issue because I could sleep through it but now it hurts and wakes me up.
  • edited October 2019
    EDD/Weeks + Days: Guessing 5+3. 

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? DS turned 2 in September.

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Blissfully unaware. He's very possessive of me, though, so once I'm a little further along, I plan on talking about the new baby to him daily to get him ready.

    Any questions/concerns? Concerned about our apartment arrangements. We live in a 1 bedroom/1 office apartment and currently co-sleep. I am considering changing the office into DS's room and having the baby in our room, OR leaving my husband and DS in the bedroom and setting up a small nursery+twin bed in the office for me and the baby OR having us all in the bedroom and keeping DH's office intact. I go back and forth everyday.

    I know we're all super early on, but I'm curious if anyone is already having different or similar symptoms/experience this time around?  No symptoms other than being tired (significantly reduced my caffeine intake) this time around yet, same as first pregnancy. 


    @kberm3 I'm right there with you. I actually didn't plan on nursing past 1, but here we are, still nursing for naps and bedtime/overnight at 25 months. He's still so attached to it, too. I hope that my supply dries up and that will help us naturally wean, because I don't have the will power to cut him off. :( I would love for him to sleep through the night though! I'm hoping that once he's weaned we can transition out of co-sleeping too.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @kberm3 and @thinkpositive2017 I had to move my son out of our bed, and then after I dried up, started sending my husband in at night to cuddle when he woke up.. Then we kept our before bed and before nap sessions, when I started to set time limits. 

    But I couldn't let him sleep next to me after 16 months because he just wouldn't let me sleep anymore. It was awful. I did a slow transition over a few weeks, but it was good.
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @kberm3 my DS will be 2 at the end of this month as well.  I'm still nursing 1-3x per day, not as much as he would like.  Boy do my boobs hurt.  We had gotten it to where he only nursed from one side always. He will self wean cause hes not having it when I try stopping.  My daughter also self weaned around 2.5 years.  
  • I’m not breastfeeding anymore, but DS sleeps in our bed and I’m really ready to transition him into his own space. Our bed isn’t big enough for everyone anymore! He wakes up a thousand times a night and screams, hits, kicks, and pulls hair, and I’m completely over it. I try every night to get him in his bed, but like clockwork he’s up every hour. After 2-3 times, he refuses to go back down and I bring him in our bed because I’m so tired. I would love to stop co-sleeping but I honestly have no clue how. 
  • Both my boys self weaned at 14ish months. My goal was to make it a year, to where I'd stop pumping while at work and then just nurse on demand at home. I'm glad because intentionally weaning seemed daunting and honestly I don't have any desire to bf a toddler. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Due June 24 and 3 weeks, 6 days.

    My DD is 4. 

    I've been exhausted and nauseated so she has taken full advantage of mom relaxing some rules - especially about enforcing clean up.

    My symptoms are super strong super early this time...I'm on progesterone in oil which I was not last time so I wonder if that is making a difference!




    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @chaos-and-coffee First week I nursed him to sleep in his own bed(crib), and then climbed out. First time he woke that night, he moved into our bed.

    Next week same, but overnight I just nursed in his crib MOTN and left him there.

    Following week I nursed him sitting up in his crib, and laid him down after I got out, patted butt for 10 min, left. 

    Next steps, in this order: nursed him sitting up, but walked away after. nursed him in chair next to crib, patted his butt. Nursed him in chair, walked away.

    After three weeks of him in his own bed with me walking away after nursing, I started sometimes sending Daddy in for cuddles for an overnight wake up

    We had a crying cap of 20 min if just sad, or 10 min if truly hysterical.We only hit it once, and I went back in, rocked him for a min, patted butt for a min, and left, and he quieted down in 5 and was out.

    It took a long time, but I wanted to focus on going slow and showing him each step was no big deal. I also told him what I was going to do so it wasn't shocking.
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @thinkpositive2017 hello fellow small space dweller! In my mind you’ll have to at least eventually convert the office into a second bedroom. Or do you have plans to move in the next few years?

    There are loads of good ikea hacks for space saving home offices. I assume your H works from home? Does he require loads of space. 

    We’re in a 700 sq foot apartment and it’s going to be a squeeeezeee but I’m sure we’ll make it work until we formulate a moving plan ha
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @pourmeanothermocktail that is really good advice, thank you! We’re going to start trying after we get home from vacation next week and take it slow. I think just setting a goal time each night to where we try to put him back in bed and just go from there. 
  • Everyone says you show sooner after your first pregnancy. How much sooner did everyone show with their second? I'm only 7 weeks and I swear there's a baby bump. This can't be possible right? Baby is only a blueberry?! 
  • runwmusic said:
    Everyone says you show sooner after your first pregnancy. How much sooner did everyone show with their second? I'm only 7 weeks and I swear there's a baby bump. This can't be possible right? Baby is only a blueberry?! 
    Your uterus is much bigger though. That being said, uterus is still deep in your pelvis, but, it growing, even early (especially for anyone that has a short torso) aamtajpdadw be pushing your abdominal organs up and out of it's way. So yes, it's possible you're already starting to have a rounded looking belly, caused indirectly by baby. It's a lot of bloat too for some people, but not everyone. I don't get a lot of bloat but I do get the immediate bump look- I have a very short torso and at 6+2 (I think) this is the latest I've ever not been in maternity clothes. But it's also the first pregnancy where I started with a larger, looser regular wardrobe. 
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @pourmeanothermocktail I have a super short torso so I guess that doesn't help things. I'm still in my normal jeans at 7+1 but idk for how much longer. Looking back at pictures I wants this big until 11 weeks last time  :'(:s
  • runwmusic said:
    @pourmeanothermocktail I have a super short torso so I guess that doesn't help things. I'm still in my normal jeans at 7+1 but idk for how much longer. Looking back at pictures I wants this big until 11 weeks last time  :'(:s
    I feel you. With my first I got asked if I was due that day starting at about 22 weeks. 

    With my second, I was not only bigger, but, when I hung out with other pregnant people, I was larger than most people who were 12 + weeks further along. At 12 weeks, I was only maybe in inch or so less far out than my friend at her baby shower, at 34 weeks....

    I hear you.

    I can't wear regular jeans already, I'm only barely managing regular leggings. So I'm living in sweat pants and super relaxed fit joggers, pulled up super high, lol. That's how I'm managing not wearing maternity yet. I've been pregnant every other winter for 4 years now, and I hate most of my maternity pants but I'm too broke to replace them. Oh well. Looking forward to ditching everything after this pregnancy!
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I'm wearing a lot of stretchy stuff or dresses.  With my second I was noticeably showing to the point someone could ask "are you pregnant?" around 15 weeks so I imagine this one will be the same, vs. the first was probably 20 weeks.  Right now it's just all bloat.  I constantly feel full and feel bloated, so I know that's it for me.  
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @runwmusic yesterday I walked into the break room and a CNA just eyed me and asked what was up, said I looked different.  I'm barely 6 weeks but she says my belly looks higher. 
    We weren't planning on telling family until Thanksgiving but that's another 6 weeks to try and hide, idk if that's going to be possible.  
  • With my previous (second) I got questioned by regular customers (bartender) by 7/8 weeks. So we just told the grandparents, our siblings, and close friends this weekend already, at 6 weeks. 
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I luckily have my maternity clothes from DS, everything else I got rid of because i thought we were done. 
    We are going to need all the clothes :(
  • Looking back at photos from my first pregnancy, I don’t think I started wearing maternity leggings and jeans until I was 18-20 weeks along.  It was summer so I know I was wearing a lot of loose, flowy dresses which helped but I see photos where I was still wearing my non-maternity leggings as late as 16 weeks.  I’ve heard most people start showing 4-ish weeks earlier in their second pregnancies?  Not sure if that’s true or not, but I guess we’ll see.  
  • EDD/Weeks + Days: 
    6 + 4, June 5

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? 
    3.5 year old son

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
    We haven’t told him yet, but I’m hoping he will be excited. He’s been asking for a brother and a sister lately, so hopefully that means he’ll be happy with either one. 

    Any questions/concerns?
    Since my son is older than some kids are when their first sibling is born, I’m conscious of making him feel special throughout the process. If anyone has great ideas for how to tell siblings about a pregnancy, how to involve them in getting excited about the baby before its arrival, or how to make them feel special in the adjustment period after the baby is born, I’d love to hear them! 
  • So, I asked my daughter (she's nearly 3.5) how she'd feel/if she'd like it if we got a new baby... a brother or sister... and she's pretty adamant she does NOT want that to happen lol. So yay? Definitely told her that it's going to happen...but not for a while, not til she's 4. So she doesn't fully know I'm pregnant right now just feeling things out.
    ~~Signature Trigger Warning~~

    Me: 32; Him: 36
    Married: Oct 20, 2013
    BFP 1: Aug 31, 2015
    EDD 1: May 12, 2016
    DD1 Emma born May 12, 2016
    An Honest Account of New Motherhood (with Postpartum Anxiety, Depression, and OCD)

    BFP 2: October 07, 2019
    EDD 2: June 20, 2020


  • Did you feel baby 2 (or later) earlier than your first? My nausea is basically gone so I'm freaking out wishing I could feel baby kicking. 
  • My son already went through getting a sibling once. Really emphasizing how big and wonderful he was made a difference. We made sure he was given some new privileges shortly before baby arrived, some new big kid toys as presents from arrival, and got him a baby doll so he could practice doing baby things with me. This time I really want to get him a doll carrier. 

    New privileges-getting new craft supplies, got him a new toddler table to eat at (so I didn't have to lift him into booster), being allowed to eat some meals in front of TV (because baby with major colic), etc. New toys were play dough, dry erase board books, water colors. 

    @runwmusic I did feel baby 2 much earlier. But, I had an anterior placenta that started very low. So, I started feeling baby at maybe 13/14 weeks I think, but at 16 weeks I stopped being able to feel baby as placenta started moving more up in front of baby, that was scary. Started feeling baby again around 21 weeks as baby got big enough to kick and punch through placenta. 

    First baby I just didn't feel until 19 weeks, even though placenta was behind baby where we like it.
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @hayhay2501 We rent so there is a possibility of moving when our lease is up next September if we feel like we need more space by then. But I love our apartment so I'm hoping we can make the small space work.

    DH used to work from home, but he goes into an office for his new job now most days of the week. We never changed the office set up after he got a new job though because he still uses the office to write on weekends and some evenings (he's currently turning his dissertation into a book). It's the only room in the house that doesn't have kid stuff in it, and he's picky about his writing space. We've talked about it a lot and he is willing to give it up if we need to, but it's sort of a last resort option for him. (Ironically, I work from home full time but my desk is set up in the living room.)

    DS has slept in our room since he was born (first in a bassinet, then a mini crib, now a toddler bed but really just in our king bed) and while the logical solution would be to move him into the office, I would actually miss having him so close. It's really convenient now since he still nurses at night, and I can push his wake up time out by 1-2 hours in the morning with a morning session. I'm worried that moving him to his own room would cause him to wake up and stay awake earlier in the day. However, I do plan to wean him over the next few weeks (hoping it'll happen naturally as my supply drops) so maybe after he's weaned would be a good time to transition him out of co-sleeping too.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • mamaqdubumamaqdubu member
    edited October 2019
    EDIT!!!
    Don't mind me guys...I'm from May2020 trying to find the sibling thread and somehow landed here by mistake. Whoops!!
    ----------------------------------------------------------
    Wow, this thread was hard to find. I'm not sure why it wouldn't come up to the top!

    Anyways... 
    @runwmusic I felt DS2 about 14-15 weeks... and that was much sooner than DS1 which was closer to 18-20 weeks. 

    As far as bumps go, I got pregnant 6 months after DS1 was born. I ballooned so quickly and was in full on maternity clothes by 11-12 weeks. This time, having almost 2 years in between pregnancies, I'm definitely seeing less immediate "blump". I'll probably still be in maternity clothes soon, but I don't feel my pants getting tight too yet at 8+5. I'm hoping I can hide this all for a little bit longer because I have a TON of work travel scheduled for November & December, and I'm not ready to start telling my customers let alone my colleagues 
  • I'm 4w 3d due 6/22/2020. 

    DS turned 4 in August 

    He has been asking for a baby sister for months and asking why all his friends get to be big brothers and sisters but he doesn't so I know when we tell him he is going to be sooo excited. We plan on telling him after we get our first ultrasound at 6+4 from the fertility doc.  We have family pictures 2 days later so I think we will tell him during those and capture his excitement that way. 

    This is the first time we had to do fertility treatment to achieve pregnancy so having to get betas has had me stressed but now we know they are good I'm better.  As far as symptoms go my boobs hurt way more than I remember. 
  • EDD/Weeks + Days: 
    3+5, super early

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? 
    3 and 15 months 

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
    My 15 month old obviously won’t know what’s going on for a while. My 3 year old has autism and although he’s a smart kiddo his speech/language is very delayed so he won’t know/understand either because he doesn’t really have the language to understand. Other than that, they are great! 

    Any questions/concerns?
    no questions, but yes I am very concerned with how I’m going to handle 3 kids. We always wanted a 3rd, but we wanted to wait until our oldest was 5 and in kindergarten. Having a special needs child takes up sooooo much time and energy, so it feels scary right now. 
  • edited October 2019
    EDD/Weeks + Days:  6/26/20. 4 weeks 

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? 
    I have a DS that is 23 months and a step daughter that is 10 months. 

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
    Rough question right now. DS just had an evaluation for development and if he doesn’t catch up in development in 12 months he will qualify for special Ed. Waiting for a phone call from his doctor to come in for an eye surgery for his strabismus and we still have to see an orthopedic surgeon about braces for his legs! I’m overwhelmed and honestly I was on the pill because we decided to take a break from TTC so we could focus on him. 

    Symptom wise this is very different from DS. I have minimal symptoms so far except for a stabbing pain in my right side by my ovary, random nausea and my boobs are KILLING ME. With DS my boobs just felt really full, and I had a pinching feeling in my uterus but that was it until about 12 weeks. 


  • EDD/Weeks + Days: 
    4 weeks & 6 days!

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? 
    I have a 2 year old daughter ❤️

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
    She's doing great! She's a fairly happy kid. She plays alot with her puppy and loves being outside. We just tried explaining to her today that mommy has a baby in her belly.

    Any questions/concerns?
    Nope :)

    I know we're all super early on, but I'm curious if anyone is already having different or similar symptoms/experience this time around?

    Oh definitely! With my daughter I was irritable and super hungry! With this pregnancy I'm crying at everything and I don't even want to eat. I'm also really dizzy! The only similarities are my fatigue and sore boobs.
  • So, I had a good, hard cry last night, because my daughter asked to see a picture of her friend's new baby brother & then proceeded to get upset & say she "didn't like Kane" (that's the baby) & "didn't want Kane to happen to her." (A while back, I told her that a new baby was "going to happen," and she's latched onto that phrase.) 

    Hormones made me cry all the cries because obviously I'm ruining her life, taking "us" away from her, and she's going to be damaged by this and...and... /melodrama

    ANYWAYS... so one of my mom board friends had an idea that I really liked - I had always planned to give DD a gift from the baby when it was born, but she suggested I have the baby give her little gifts throughout the pregnancy. So, I've decided, starting next month, I'm going to have the baby write her little letters & send her little gifts every month or so (like holidays, etc.) to start building a positive relationship as best I can. 

    The only thing I"m randomly concerned about now is that DD will then expect the baby to be born ready to walk, talk, and play, so I'll have to work some explanation about how tiny & incapable the baby will be at first into the letters somehow.

    Overthink much?

    Anyways, I thought it was a really neat idea, and it makes me hopeful.
    ~~Signature Trigger Warning~~

    Me: 32; Him: 36
    Married: Oct 20, 2013
    BFP 1: Aug 31, 2015
    EDD 1: May 12, 2016
    DD1 Emma born May 12, 2016
    An Honest Account of New Motherhood (with Postpartum Anxiety, Depression, and OCD)

    BFP 2: October 07, 2019
    EDD 2: June 20, 2020


  • EDD/Weeks + Days: 6/15/2020/ 6w1d 

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? My princess just turned 4 

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? My daughter is okay. she keeps asking for a sibling and I am DYING TO share the news but I am waiting until the end of November when we are more in the clear. 

    Any questions/concerns? I am significantly heavier than I was with my daughter and I CONSTANTLY worry about miscarrying. I did not have this anxiety with my daughter.  

    I know we're all super early on, but I'm curious if anyone is already having different or similar symptoms/experience this time around?  I feel just as tired but the nausea set in VERY early. It is horrible. I threw up all and everything with my daughter and I will take that over this constant feeling of severe nausea. Like I need to puke but nothing comes out 24/7. Insomnia is something I never had until now as well. It is driving me crazy. 
  • @saladflambe I was planning on doing that for my almost 4 year old too. Nervous about changing his idea of family when it’s been only him for so long. He loves gifts so i expect it to work well. Best wishes to you!
    image
  • EDD/Weeks + Days:  6/23 (5+3)

    How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD turned 3 today ❤️

    How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? She knows nothing but DH asked her if she wanted a baby brother or sister and her response was, “no thanks!” So, there’s that 😂

    Any questions/concerns? Having a reaction to my PIO injections and the RE basically just told me that if I end up needing to come off the injections, I’ll have to go on progesterone suppositories... which isn’t ideal bc the risk of MC is higher with that. So, I’ll just be over here covering my ass and hips in cortisone and hating my life for the next 6 weeks. 
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