Weekly Randoms - week of 10/7

shamrocandroll · October 2019

Random thoughts go here.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/dj/peyjd9bn4uhi.gif

jhysmath · October 2019

My best friend is starting to think about having kids and is starting researching even though she doesn't plan on officially trying until this summer (she's a teacher too and wants to plan on a spring baby). I'm having so much fun helping her research her hospitals and telling her what to look for and all things ttc. I feel like all my knowledge of all things ttc and birth can be used again and it's exciting. Also her and her husband are going to be great parents. When I went to visit them when DD was 6 months old, I walked in the door and her husband (a chef) had dinner ready took the baby and said we needed time to catch up and eat and he would eat later.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@jhysmath You probably know all of this already, but putting in my PGAL two cents: have her read Taking Charge of Your Fertility. Also, just make sure you help to set her expectation that you can't always time these things perfectly. It can take a healthy couple up to a year to get pregnant, so have her give herself a little bit of buffer on either end of her window she wants to try for so she doesn't get absolutely shattered if it doesn't happen within a couple of months. Hopefully she's one of the lucky ones who is able to have it all work out as planned!

jhysmath · October 2019

@shamrocandroll
That was the first book I recommended to her! I also told her it might not happen so quickly especially because she's had IUD for the last 10ish years. I told her to get that out sooner than later so she can start figuring out when she ovulates. She told me she bought ovulation test strips but didn't realize that she likely won't ovulate with the IUD. She knows I had a MC first and her husbands best friend was told they were having one early in their pregnancy too, the also had their baby 6 weeks early due to complications so she's aware plans might change drastically.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@jhysmath Sounds like you're giving her all the right guidance, then!

I just hate to see people think they can time it down to the month and then realize it's not always so simple. And yes, my OB told me to give myself at least one full cycle after having my IUD removed, and that it could take several cycles. Sounds like you're giving her all the right guidance!

TattoosandLace · October 2019

Can I complain about my coworker? I don't want to wait for TW Tuesday.
I'm 8w0d today. Pregnancy has been really crappy in my office (as I'm the only married employee and only with children besides our boss). Basically two coworkers are trying to get me fired but didn't realize they can't do that based solely on being pregnant. *eyeroll*
anyway, the third coworker laughed at me as I adjusted my clothing after sitting down and goes "ready to bust out the maternity clothes?" wtaf. lets not discuss my body.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@TattoosandLace Wow, that is wildly inappropriate on both counts! I'm really sorry you're dealing with a toxic environment!

TattoosandLace · October 2019

@shamrocandroll What's sad is I really like my actual job..... I just really can't take much more of the coworkers. I keep reminding myself that I like my job and need good insurance for Bean, but it is so tempting to quit. I feel pretty defeated. I'm bloated, nauseous all the time (I think sinus drainage from allergies is playing a huge roll in it), and want to just do my job instead of worrying about what people are saying and fielding sh*tty comments like that all day.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@TattoosandLace Is there someone you trust who you can talk to about this? Like, the coworkers trying to get you fired based on your pregnancy should at the very least know that's illegal.

TattoosandLace · October 2019

@shamrocandroll the one thing I learned early on at this job was to trust no one. LOL that's apparently government for you.
I had a conversation with the HR person (who is not in my office, but in the county clerk's office). She didn't have much to say. Now I'm struggling with whether or not my husband and I announce this last addition earlier than we wanted (we usually wait until after the anatomy scan) because now that work has assumed and got confirmation when I informed coworker that my medical information was none of her business, I'm sure word will be getting around our small town quickly.
My first appointment with the OBGYN isn't until next Monday.

darkrose88 · October 2019

@TattoosandLace Ugh I'm so sorry you're having to deal with a toxic work environment. Also, that you were forced to announce your pregnancy early. I HATE people who do things like assume they know what's going on with your body. When I was about 6 months postpartum with DS, a lady at work looked at my stomach and asked me when I was due.

It was very rude, and discouraging especially since I was actively working on losing weight and thought I had looked cute that day. Nobody has the right to make comments about another person's body. I've guessed that people are pregnant in the past, but would never ask because it is none of my business.

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@TattoosandLace I’m mad for you. That whole situation sounds shitty. And I hate that HR wasn’t advocating for you. Is it possible for the two coworkers to get you fired?

darkrose88 · October 2019

So I just came out of a meeting where we were reviewing milestones and the projected deadline for the main project I'm working on. I got out a kick out of the fact the project close date is 5/31/2019, which is the two days after my due date. For some reason I thought we were ending in June/July. It made me feel much better because if we meet this goal I won't be bailing on my team right before the final go live.

TattoosandLace · October 2019

@darkrose88 sweet! I think I would hate leaving a team mid-project too.

pirateduck · October 2019

I just want to digest food normally for one freakin day

mdfarmchick · October 2019

My four year old fell asleep at 4 pm and I am so jealous. Here’s hoping he sleeps all night because I couldn’t get him to open his eyes, not even for chocolate cake.

Linsbins · October 2019

pirateduck said:

I just want to digest food normally for one freakin day

THIS

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@darkrose88 The big project I've been on for 3 years now has been delayed 3 or 4 times now, and the most recent forecast is looking like a May 2020 launch date. The project manager is NOT going to be happy with me, but if they had just launched on time the first 3 times, we wouldn't be in this situation.

jhysmath · October 2019

@pirateduck
Yes I'm so sick of either being backed up or having to go right.freaking.now and my husband is in the shower. I will pee in front of him, but even after 12 years I cannot fathom pooping in front of him.

jhysmath · October 2019

DD thought 1 am was a great time to play and talk my ear off. I wish I had a clue what she was saying because she just didn't stop. She also loved jumping on the bed and thought she was hilarious. She hasn't been up like that in probably 6 months so it was super annoying and all I kept thinking about is what if this baby is one of those that doesn't sleep at night. I was up every 2 hours with DD until she was like 9 months old but she always fell back to sleep after being fed, what if this kid is one of those ones you have to walk around at the wee hours because they don't go back to sleep and just scream. I never thought I had an easy time with her waking up every 2 hours, but I can't imagine having to deal with a kid who's up all night and a toddler who likely doesn't sleep through the night yet either.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@jhysmath Our master toilet was leaking around the wax seal and through the floor, and we were without one for over a week. One night I had to run outside to throw up in the middle of reading DS a bedtime story because MH was in the bathroom. We finally put in a new toilet last weekend and I've never been so happy to have my own toilet to throw up in.

ETA words

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@jhysmath I'm one of those terrible parents who emotionally scarred my kid for life (sarcasm) because I sleep trained him. The first few days were horrible, but it was so so so worth it in the long run! He is the best sleeper now!

jhysmath · October 2019

@shamrocandroll
We only have 1 at the apartment we live in right now it's been a huge adjustment as MH prefers to take the longest shits ever while playing with him phone and steaming up the bathroom. He's gotten better especially now that I have to pee all the time. I've also threatened to poop on him if he takes too long with anything. In our reno of our house in NY our main concern is adding an extra bathroom. Shortly after his dad passed we were there in the winter and found out the pipes froze and the bathroom didn't work, this started our reno when everything we flushed backed up into the tub and we ended up having to walk in thigh high snow out to the outhouse to use the bathroom. I was very thankful for a heated outhouse that winter, but I would much prefer more bathrooms inside the house.

jhysmath · October 2019

@shamrocandroll
yeah I know I should, but it's just not in my heart to do it. The one night recently I didn't hear her wake up she ended up crying so much she vomited all over herself and her room. I felt so terrible. I went into parenting saying that's what I would do, and told my sister 10 years ago that's what she needed to do with my niece, but really I can't it breaks my heart when it's my own kid crying. My niece, I let her cio all the time when I watched her, the kids I was a nanny for after college, yup cio, mine she whimpers and I go to her. I'm terrible.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

jhysmath said:

@shamrocandroll
We only have 1 at the apartment we live in right now it's been a huge adjustment as MH prefers to take the longest shits ever while playing with him phone and steaming up the bathroom. He's gotten better especially now that I have to pee all the time. I've also threatened to poop on him if he takes too long with anything.
*snip*

I'm dying laughing right now. Best threat ever.

jhysmath · October 2019

@shamrocandroll
When you've got to go and you're pregnant you've got to go! I found out what holding it does last pregnancy and I'm not dealing with that again.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@jhysmath There are a lot of options in between going to them whenever they cry and letting them cry to the point of vomiting. I used a modified Ferber method (modified because I still used a pacifier), and it was short periods of crying in between going in to comfort him, and those gradually got longer and longer until he knew how to soothe himself and didn't need me to do it for him anymore. It was really hard and I had to sit in the basement with a fan on so I couldn't hear him for the first couple of nights, but it worked like magic. Now he is almost 3 and he tells me all the time "I love sleeping!"

mokay19 · October 2019

I already decided that zero buttons will be done on my pants for the rest of this pregnancy.

stella_700 · October 2019

@mokay19 I'm singing the joy of comfy, comfy maternity slacks today. I wore yesterday what was my loosest pair of jeans, by the end of the day I had unbuttoned it. I'm going switch out my wardrobe this weekend. Fall has finally arrived here so it needs to be done anyway. : )

darkrose88 · October 2019

@shamrocandroll I've already told my project manager/boss that I'm pregnant. She took the news well, all things considering, and just said, well I'm probably not going to worry about it until closer to Jan/Feb. She also knows it is very early for me to be telling people, so was very respectful of me wanting to wait until I'm further along before announcing it to the world.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@darkrose88 I've had 2 miscarriages, so I'm not comfortable telling anyone (even family) until 12-13 weeks. Last time I was pretty much forced to tell my boss before I was even able to tell my parents, and I felt awful about that.

darkrose88 · October 2019

@shamrocandroll completely understandable. I was hesitant about telling her, because I've also had a miscarriage in the past. But our relationship is more co-worker friends than boss/employee, plus she has been very open and honest with me about her infertility issues, so I knew she'd be supportive/understanding if this pregnancy were to go south.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

@darkrose88 That's great to have that kind of support at work. My boss is male, so... as much as he tries to be empathetic, he never truly can be, and he often puts his foot in his mouth and pisses me off. So best to avoid it for now.

darkrose88 · October 2019

@shamrocandroll ugh, that just stinks. hopefully he can keep his opinions/comments to himself when you do get around to telling him... men can be so insensitive about topics like this.

pirateduck · October 2019

My department only has 3 people, my immediate supervisor is childless by choice. She knows my husband and I have been trying since our wedding 3 years ago, and knows it hasn't been easy for us (you gotta say something when you have this many doctors' appointments), but I'm still not sure how she will take it. Me being out for the busiest time of the year is going to be a massive hit to the department.

shamrocandroll · October 2019

I just got this ad on my FB, and now I can't stop laughing at this imaginary scenario in my head

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/fh/m0jszyqowjqa.png

MH: Cool, what game is that? Can I try?
Me: No, you can't
MH: Why not?
Me: Because you don't have a vagina
MH: ........?

jhysmath · October 2019

@shamrocandroll I love playing the Wtf is facebook trying to sell me.

darkrose88 · October 2019

@pirateduck That'll be tough for your department, but it is not like you can choose when you're going to have a baby... and you certainly weren't going to stop trying for a baby just because you could get KU during your department's busy time. That's a seriously unrealistic exception for any business. They will still get plenty of notice ahead of time when you do tell them, and can always hire a temp (if possible). Hopefully your supervisor will be supportive given your medical history.

@shamrocandroll LOL! I've gotten advertised that too, and literally just don't understand... like who came up with that idea?

mdfarmchick · October 2019

@darkrose88 a man. A man came up with that idea. 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

mdfarmchick · October 2019

If you watch Hallmark Christmas movies and you are pregnant just be prepared. 😂😂😂

jhysmath · October 2019

@mdfarmchick I just balled my eyes out finally watching the last episode of handmaids tale. Legit with sniffles. MH says are you crying from the other room...yup yup I am. I think I'll refrain from hallmark movies for the time being.

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