TFAS 7/8

mercury94 · July 2019

@newmomtx06 I have not figured out a way to get notified on mobile. It’s kind of difficult to use, but I have no other option most of the time.

shamrocandroll · July 2019

@newmomtx06 Unfortunately, no. TB app is AWFUL!

newmomtx06 · July 2019

@mercury94 @shamrocandroll frustrating. I don’t have another option either. I’ll just try to make sure I check the convo! Thanks.

NYTino24 · July 2019

I was feeling so optimistic today and hoping to have good news about having an empty ute at my OB appointment on Thursday and then I showed up to our lake to meet my friend and her sons.
*TW pregnancy / loss mentioned*

She was obviously pregnant and hadn’t said anything the last FIVE months. We’ve talked weekly, including about my struggles to get and stay pregnant although not solely about that, and she didn’t even come out and say it when I saw her in person today. In fact, she acted like I knew and made some comments about FMLA and two in daycare. Apparently I didn’t notice any belly two weeks ago... I put two and two together when her friend made a different comment. She left to go to the bathroom and came back and talked some more and it was so awkward because I had to acknowledge it. At first, she said, “Oh, didn’t I tell you?!” and then a couple of minutes later she was like, “Well, I didn’t want to say anything until we told (older son) since he had a hard time with (younger son) and then he noticed my stomach and asked. Plus I knew about what you were going through.” I mean personally, it would have been nice to have more time to get used to the idea... but not my life or decisions. I’m really happy for her, especially since she had a loss when they thought they were done... but it was a punch to the gut.

shamrocandroll · July 2019

@NYTino24 Ugh, I'm sorry you were blindsided like that. But also I'd like to hope she was trying to preserve your feelings by not telling you. But really awkward to just try to ignore it like that!

NYTino24 · July 2019

@shamrocandroll I texted her to tell her congrats again and to again offer to let her borrow some baby stuff since they thought they were done and had gotten rid of it. She texted me at the same time I hit send and apologized, saying basically what I had thought. She deserves to be happy and supported, so I don’t want her feeling bad for me. It’s hard, but other people getting their babies has nothing to do with my chances. I can feel a bit jealous and acknowledge it within myself, but my struggles are mine and I don’t want to make anyone else suffer just because I am. I’m grateful for the things and people I have in life, including her as a friend.

mokay19 · July 2019

@newmomtx06 I sooooo wish you could get TB notification on your phone! The app is embarrassing for TB haha

@NYTino24 I'm so sorry for that encounter. That's a strange way to go about it by your friend. Obviously, you're happy for a close friend, but you still want to be able to process the news in your own way and not at a meeting with other people around. Hugs to you!

flinstone-2 · July 2019

@NYTino24 i'm so sorry! Last time we really tried to be cognizant of those we knew were struggling. We told a couple before we told our family just to give them some privacy and time with the news. I don't even know if that was the right thing to do.

kpearse99 · July 2019

@puppylove8910 thanks for the PM!! (I’m on mobile for the next few days so I won’t be able to check it until I can get on my laptop... it’s so dumb you can’t check your PM from the mobile app! But I’ll get back to you soon!) also, such amazing news on potty training!!! Don’t worry about night training yet!! That will happen!

mercury94 · July 2019

@kpearse99 You can check PM on mobile.

kpearse99 · July 2019

@bows22 and @flinstone-2 I’m so sorry for the BFN ladies

DH is always so more optimistic here too... he yelled at me the other week for being so negative haha 🤷🏻‍♀️ It sucks being the woman when you’re TTC!

@whatsbumpinpumpkin such great news on potty training!!! And I’m so jealous of the Disney trip!!

@mercury94 I feel like I’m getting to that point of not wanting to test until I’m like two days late. All of this really really sucks! It hurts so much every month to see those negatives, the kind of hurt that really makes your heart ache. And no matter how we try to dress it up and look for the good in it all... it still really stings. I can’t imagine going through all of this without you ladies. ♥️♥️♥️

charmedlifex3 · July 2019

@bows22 It took two night of battle to get him to sleep in his room again, but on the third night he was fine! The first night he just kept fussing for "Mommy bed!" the second night, he went down in his room fine, but fell out of bed FOUR times. Two before I pulled him in with me, and twice after.

@newmomtx06 Seriously? omg. eyerolling so hard for you. It sounds like he was just clueless.

kpearse99 · July 2019

@mercury94 oh goodness!!! Hahaha thank you for pointing that out for me!! 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

@NYTino24 I completely get what you’ve just experienced. It sucks to be caught off guard like that, but I can understand why your friend wouldn’t have told you, she probably didn’t want it to hurt your feelings especially knowing everything you’re going through. But your outlook on it is a really good perspective to have... other people’s lives has no baring on yours. I like that a lot. I’m sending you so many creepy Internet hugs ♥️♥️

As for me... my HSG came back all normal and healthy looking, which is great!! It wasn’t nearly as bad as I was so nervous for! It was like a Pap smear but maybe a tiny bit more aggressive feeling... I didn’t even feel the dye go in! Now DH and I have some more bloodwork scheduled for tomorrow and then our follow up is for next Friday to discuss plans. I made a comment to my doctor of something like “it’s great that we are both healthy and all things are operating as they should... but we still can’t seem to get pregnant.” And he said “there are more ways to win, so don’t you worry! We will meet next week to discuss our next steps to get you a baby!”

Im really not stressing or overly trying for this cycle. I think I’ll be ovulating soon so we’ll miss quite a few days the rest of this week with our trip to Canada with DS. And I think I’m actually okay with that... kind of like a little mental break, right?!

tyrion_ · July 2019

@flinstone-2 I have a lot of anxiety and worry about this. My husband has even brought up his fears on how it might impact our kids. I have it way more in control now, thankfully. And I’m sorry about your bfn today.

@millpe what part of Florida? We just did a mini-vacation on the SW coast.

@jennifer_louise The crowd of TTGP/TFAS grads last week had me feeling some type of way. I was caught off guard by my envy. I also ache for those of that have been here for so long and keep having to say bye to people. I want so badly for you to be one of the ones that gets to move on next.

@bows22 Sorry about the bfn.

@gingermama29 Hope your surgery goes well tomorrow! Update us when you can.

@shamrocandroll I am hoping you get a BFP here soon to makeup for your slew of crap you’ve been handed. I’m glad it wasn’t nasty water at least. Were you guys able to have someone come check it out today?

@kpearse99 Glad it went well!

@mercury94 You are wise with your words.

@jd614 I’m sorry for your losses.

@puppylove8910 Glad potty training went well! How’d he do today?

@whatsbumpinpumpkin How many days did you do Disney? Where’d you stay? Which parks? I love Disney!

@nytino24 I am so sorry that happened between you and your friend. That stuff is so hard.

charmedlifex3 · July 2019

My parents have a condo we stayed at and my son is only two, so we just did one day at the magic kingdom. It kinda stunk we couldn't go to the beaches really because of all the crazy bacteria - I didn't want to take the chance!!!
@puppylow8910 we are in the potty training war too. I sent him to daycare in a pull up, he screamed at me "NO! MY DIAPY!"
@NYTino24 That's hard. Not an easy situation for anyone. It sounds like she might have been trying to be kind, and just kinda... missed.
@tyrion_ @millpe The west coast is where my parents are! about an hour south of Tampa, in Port Charlotte.

tyrion_ · July 2019

@whatsbumpinpumpkin We just got back from Fort Myers Beach last night. I live in Orlando and we frequent Disney. But can you share more
about this bacteria?! Am I dying now?!

bows22 · July 2019

@NYTino24 ugh I am so sorry for the blindside. That’s so awkward. But I’m glad you guys seemed to work it out.

@whatsbumpinpumpkin oh that’s so encouraging that there wasn’t any long term damage done! we are planning to use the pack & play on vaca but am only moderately optimistic about its success.

@kpearse99 I’m so glad your HSG went so well! I love “there are more ways to win”!

NYTino24 · July 2019

@kpearse99 Sounds like you’ve got a good doctor there. A lot of them need better bedside manner, especially in OBGYN!
@whatsbumpinpumpkin Have you tried the pool noodle trick?

millpe · July 2019

@tyrion_ and @whatsbumpinpumpkin We will be in Naples, so also west coast! I've seen a little in the news about the bacteria, but I think we are still going to the beach as long as no one has open sores! Just going to make sure we stay out of any stagnant water, if possible.

shamrocandroll · July 2019

@tyrion_ No, we didn't call anyone to come out. The place where it backed up is right by the main drain pipe, so we were able to check it and make sure it was totally clear ourselves (which, it was). So it was just that I did so much laundry and had extra people flushing the toilets that it flooded the septic tank a little bit and backed up. It's all good now. And thank you! I hope we have some good luck coming our way soon!

*Edited typo

tyrion_ · July 2019

What number are you trying for? 3

Month/Cycle? 2/2 AL

WTO/TWW? WTO (but I’m pretty positive I ovulated overnight)

Ages of other child(ren)? 4 and 2

Any thoughts about this cycle? Praying for one sperm to find their way!

Any questions? None

Rant/Rave/Brag: I got a blazing OPK yesterday midday and that has been the most eventful part of my week. My rant is that of course my husband was too tired to HIO the last two nights. But he did come wake me up at 5am because he felt bad. We just need one to make it!

**TW loss mentioned** I also got a lovely text from my sister saying, “you guys need to hurry and have more kids!” She knows I miscarried in May. I just responded with, “we are trying our best.” I know she didn’t mean any harm and it’s my fault for being vocal about wanting to have a big family. It was just deflating.

GTKY: What is one thing you didn't like about your childhood that you want to change for your LOs?

When my parents would be mad at us they withheld affection. I will NEVER do that to my kids. I can be mad but also still fulfill my kids’ emotional needs. I know my parents didn’t do it to be awful but it wasn’t a great technique for discipline.

mokay19 · July 2019

@tyrion_ yay for 5am HIO!
Sorry to hear about the insensitive text from your sister. When I told my sister that we were discussing IVF she goes “you’ve only had 2 losses though...” and I was silent when she said that because I was thinking “yea, 2 losses and it took 17 months for DD and now we’re on 14 months for baby #2” and I think she immediately realized how bad that was and apologized.

NYTino24 · July 2019

@tyrion_ @mokay19 My jaw dropped reading their comments. Those are downright messed up things to say to someone. Yesterday I was told, “I borrowed my friend’s Ava bracelet. I can ask her if you can use it. I only needed it for about two weeks...” Thanks for rubbing that in. Grrr

tyrion_ · July 2019

@mokay19 Ugh, I’m sorry she said that. Those comments, while innocent, just gnaw at a still raw wound. It’s not like you’re doing IVF for funsies.

shamrocandroll · July 2019

Ughhh @tyrion_ @mokay19 @NYTino24 I'm so sorry about those comments! They sting so much, even though they're said so harmlessly.

flinstone-2 · July 2019

@tyrion_ I hear you on the big pee party and how many people got to move on. It stinks but it also gives me hope that it can happen! Hopefully a few more of us can move on this month! And as to withholding affection, wow that hurts! Even when I'm mad at DS for something I always scoop him up and tell him I love him. Also, my sister says the worst things to me **TW** she is pregnant now and has gotten pregnant on the first try for all 3 kids. She spent the majority of her first trimester telling me how miserable it was and how sick she is. Each time I told her I would be thrilled to be in your shoes. ANd she'd just say "oh ya..." Then she sent me an unused box of OPKs in the mail... and texts me every so often asking if I've used them. **END TW**

jennifer_louise · July 2019

@tyrion_ yeah gee, thanks sis! Good reminder. I'm glad you got your HIO in, and sorry for that little gut punch.

@mokay19 "only two losses"??! That strikes me as a stupid combination of words. There's no "only" with losses.

@flinstone-2 okay yall have ridiculous sisters, officially!! I'm sorry you have to deal with that too!

It makes me feel so appreciative of my super supportive sister who has really been my best advocate in this process.

mercury94 · July 2019

@flinstone-2 @mokay19 @NYTino24 @tyrion_

What is it with these people. Mind you’re own business, Karen. Also, WTF with sending you unused OPKs and asking if you’ve used them. Maybe I like a different brand, maybe I don’t want to tell you about my pee schedule. Leave me alone. I’m sorry you all are dealing with these insensitive people. I have totally hit the point where I usually make people feel bad for asking the questions by telling them I’m on fertility drugs, so I’m not sure there’s much else I can do to speed things along at this point.

charmedlifex3 · July 2019

@millpe @tyrion_
https://www.wfla.com/news/sarasota-county/port-charlotte-woman-gets-flesh-eating-bacteria-in-foot-at-popular-florida-beach/
So scary. We were only there a week, and my son did have a small cut on his foot (he stepped on a tiny toy traffic cone) so it just didn't seem worth the risk! We just swam in the pool at the complex, and went to see my aunt and swam in her pool. We did have dinner at Sharky's on the Pier, so that was our "beach" time, lol.
@Flintstones2 The ONLY reasonable justification I can see for the unused OPK texting is if you never thanked her, she might be fishing for it. Weird though.
@mokay19 I've had three, and I had a doctor say something similar. I changed doctors.
@NYTino24 He rolls right over it. This kid... I caught him sleeping with his shoulder on my bed and his feet dangling down so he was "standing" on my night stand. #whosleepslikethat

tyrion_ · July 2019

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/e3/2wzlieba4xy0.gif

@whatsbumpinpumpkin Oh, dear lord.

bows22 · July 2019

@tyrion_ I’m with you on the pee party envy! I am hoping to have at least 1 TTGPer with me if I ever get to a BMB, March has about 25 of them haha.

Also @ everyone’s sisters - WTAF? Bless you all for not killing them.

flinstone-2 · July 2019

@bows22 Unfortunately I've had to start slowly shutting my sister out.. I just can't separate her questions about me TTC from her pregnancy, etc. It makes me feel like a terrible sibling, but I also am almost brought to tears every time we discuss so I have to choose me right now.

I'm putting out the vibes for for a large August pee party graduation and for those already mid cycle a late July graduation!

bows22 · July 2019

@flinstone-2 it sucks but I agree you have to put yourself first sometimes. You aren’t a terrible sibling, and it’s only temporary❤️

I am totally with you on the vibes for some major pee parties soon!

gingermama29 · July 2019

@flinstone-2 you've gotta do what's best for you, even if that means shutting her out for a bit. Take care of yourself.
And an August pee party sounds good to me! 😊

bobbyflies2020 · July 2019

I have been hanging out in Benched and IF lately, but everyone know I am loving you all and this group so much and I can relate so much to these frustrations.

newmomtx06 · July 2019

@flinstone-2 I am so sorry about your sister! People can be so hurtful without even thinking about it. Take whatever time you need away from her and feel no guilt over it. Self-care is so important and you have to make yourself a priority!

@mokay19 seriously?! “Only two losses?” Ugh. I am so sorry 😐

NYTino24 · July 2019

@flinstone-2 How direct have you been with her? It’s such a sucky situation, but if it’s making you suffer, I’d say something.

bobbyflies2020 · July 2019

I don't know where I go anymore. I am benched this month. We have a bunch of tests to prove to insurance that we need IVF and survery for my uterus: pelvic MRI for me, urologist and another SA for my husband. After these tests my doctor will talk to me about IVF. Meanwhile I am trying to learn as much as possible about the procedures. It seems you need to take bc for a month, hormones shots, a trigger shot and then ER, transfer and wait for BFP. Also, being overweight can decrease success rates? So I am trying to work on that 😬

mercury94 · July 2019

@bobbyflies2020 Are you on the IF thread too? I know inthewoods is in the middle of the IVF process and might be able to help you get some insight. Also, @BusinessWife. I don’t have any experience with IVF. Wishing you so much luck in the process.

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