Pregnant after IF

PAIF New Mommies - May

Can you believe it's already May?!  Soon I'm going to be roasting in the heat down here in Florida. 

How's everyone doing? As always, remember you can join us on facebook :smile: https://www.facebook.com/groups/563424387441169/?ref=bookmarks


Anne has become an official toddler! She took her first steps on her own on Friday and hasn't stopped since. She's still very wobbly and can't make it very far without tumbling, but she's constantly practicing :smile:  So now I get to worry about something else! :wink: Probably language development hehe.

The major issue we've been dealing with is tantrums when she doesn't get what she wants. If you're holding something she wants and won't give it to her, she flies into a little fit. I've had to sit on my wallet (she loves playing with it) and my phone to hide them during her library storytime. It also crops up if someone is grabbing a quick bite -- she has to share ALL the food even if she just ate her own meal.

And speaking of food....PUFFS. We've tried cheerios but they seem to get everywhere --- I found a couple in her diaper -- but we're going through 4 or 5 puff canisters a week. It's crazy! All puffs all the time :smiley:

~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
Fall 2012 -- started TTC
Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

TTC #2
January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


"When all is lost then all is found."


Re: PAIF New Mommies - May

  • I’m in denial that all these babies are starting to walk! 

    Abigail turns one on the 15th and I’m feeling all the feels! We are having family pics done on her bday (complete with a smash cake!) and my parents are flying in next weekend so that’s when we’ll do her party. It’s going to be small - just both our parents and a few friends. She’s cruising along all the furniture and pulling up on everything. She’s getting so fun - loves to be chased and play hide and seek. No interest in standing on her own but I think that’ll come in a few weeks. She’s also still just babbling but I’m not too worried since she was a preemie and is excelling in everything else. 

    We are going out to town this weekend and have a 6-7 hr drive on Friday morning that may be interesting since lately she has not been a fan of being in the car. 
  • Hi ladies! Love how all r kiddies are so close in age I feel like you’re talking about gal!  Her first birthday is also a few weeks away and I’ve got all the feels for sure along with my first official mother’s day, it’s so surreal! 
    My girl is so daring she’s pulling at everything, ripping anything she can get her hands on.  @mtpbadger don’t u love how they have their own language having such a serious conversation. I’ve been looking for the perfect one year outfit but haven’t found it yet.  I one to look into the smash cake too as my girl loves making a mess!!  Didn’t this year fly by!! The first 4 months were one long day but the rest flew by! @mbradfo2 omg the tantrums are scary! She always wants any phone, remote u name it and when u take it sassy o boy.  I can’t only imagine how she’s gonna be that kid in public throwing herself on the floor when not getting her way  :s
    My girl is still such a baldy I can’t believe she’s turning one!!! She does enjoy her Cheerios! Happy to have them especially when in a pinch it lets me get the rest of her meal ready!  Did you both try pnut butter? 
    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

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  • Happy Mother's day, y'all! 
  • Happy mother's day!!
  • Happy Mother’s Day!!!

    Lately my son has become a daddy’s boy and refuses to be held by me when he is in a bad mood. So many injections and painful egg retrieval, 9 months of gestation and then 13 months+ of night feedings and this is how he repays me?! lol Was hurt a bit but then I decided I’m too sick (caught another cold) and tired to care, I need a nap! If he wants daddy, that’s great! More time to rest for me :)

    @mbradfo2 My kiddo has been walking everywhere. Now he refuses to crawl. The most he could walk is maybe 20 steps, but when he plops down, he will get right back up again and resume walking. Ditto on worrying about something else, like language development. And puffs! Lately I bought several different types of cereal to see which one he likes the best. He definitely loves the puffs, followed by Honey Nut Cheerios (organic kind, distant second though) and he honestly doesn’t care for a plain toasted Cheerios (Safeway organic kind). I tried it too but it was too bland and a bit stale so I see why he might not be into that. 

    @mtpbadger Happy birthday Abigail! It’s exciting to see babies cruising! My baby cruised forever before he finally took a plunge and made his first step. He hasn’t stopped walking since!

    @Hopeful_mom So exciting your baby is turning one soon too! My kid tried peanut butter a couple of months ago and he did fine. We haven’t given him more though as peanut butter isn’t something we eat that often. So far no food allergy for my kid. Whew!


    Me: 41  DH: 46
    Unexplained infertility/AMA, polycystic ovaries, insulin resistance
    FET#1(July 2017): eSET of first of 4 PGS-normal embryos, DS born 3/30/2018
    FET#2(Oct/Nov 2019): eSET  
  • @cashewchicken Abigail has been a daddies girl at night for a while and while I was sad at first that she would literally reach for the door when I was holding her looking for DH, I now enjoy my sleep since we both know there’s no point in me getting up with her! 

    @hopeful_mom we did peanut butter and eggs around 10 months - granted we had been to the allergist and had her tested for wheat and oats and they tested for other high allergy foods and she was negative but the allergist said the earlier exposure the better. She gets peanut butter usually on the weekends since we can’t send any to daycare (nut free zone) and looooves peanut butter toast. We started by mixing a little bit with yogurt. Her ped also wanted us to give it to her to help with her calorie intake since it’s a higher fat food
  • It’s amazing how much earlier everyone tests pnut butter these days.  I’ve gotten eggs in her and a bunch of other things so I’m really hoping shell be ok with nuts!  I’m a big fan of it and eat quite a bit of it!   My ped mentioned to try it with yogurt too @cashewchicken (hope ur cold is better! The weather has been cooky!)
    @mtpbadger ims surprised that Abigail at this age is good with pnut toast and it’s not to drying! That’s promising!! I bought the all
    natural pnut butter so hoping to try it soon.  They said I could first test it on her skin before eating it so maybe I’ll do that first. 
    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • My pediatrician mentioned that only foods babies under one can’t have are honey and cow’s milk (for drinking, instead of bm or formula). I think there is a data now that delaying giving peanut butter doesn’t reduce the chances of developing allergy. I spread a bit of peanut butter on his cereal and gave it to him and he was okay. I gave it to him on Saturday morning instead of weekday in case we needed to take him to the emergency room. Nothing happened. 
    Me: 41  DH: 46
    Unexplained infertility/AMA, polycystic ovaries, insulin resistance
    FET#1(July 2017): eSET of first of 4 PGS-normal embryos, DS born 3/30/2018
    FET#2(Oct/Nov 2019): eSET  
  • I finally have in to pnut butter and thank gd she was fine yay!! I first put some on her skin making sure there was not reaction, then some cereal that co rained pnut butter and then the real thing just to still be on he safe side.

    My girl is gonna be turning one I seriously can’t believe it!! I have got all of the feels that’s for sure! 
    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • @cashewchicken
    Anne is totally a daddy's girl!  I figure she gets enough of me all day, haha. Anne's also pretty much given up crawling and she is starting to take fewer and fewer tumbles. I was so proud of her this week -- she walked from the playroom at her school to the circle time room mostly on her own - slower than the other kiddos so I missed the announcements but it was worth it!

    @mtpbadger
    I think Anne cruised for about a month or two before she really felt confident enough for a step -- but once she did that, there was no turning back. I tried to give her as much cruising time as possible by keeping her out and on the floor during the day so she could build up her confidence navigating around the room. 

    @Hopeful_mom
    Ahh! One already! And such a relief that she seems to be OK with peanut butter -- soooo many horror stories these days with kids having bad reactions. 

    I think Anne's finally picked up her first "word" and is learning to use it with meaning -- although she does use dada from time to time with meaning. The word is 'hi'. I'm totally serious. She will literally walk up to me while I'm working at my desk and say, 'Hi' with a big smile. I think the reason the word has stuck with her so well is that it always gets a quick response -- someone says 'hi' back.  She has also started calling the dogs "gah" which may be her attempt to say 'dog'.  She definitely understands waaaay more than she can say at this point now -- I can call to her from the kitchen and say, 'Come get your milk' and she'll put down her book and start toddling over. 

    Toddlerhood is very cute...and trying (tantrums galore!). 

    ~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
    Fall 2012 -- started TTC
    Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
    Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
    September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
    Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
    June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
    August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
    September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
    March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

    TTC #2
    January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
    March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


    "When all is lost then all is found."


  • Hey guys, sorry I'm such a bad bumpie!!! ...and now it's June.  Happy belated Mother's Day, ladies! 💖💖💖

    I have started thinking about her birthday party, too... not that it's coming up for a bit.  @mtpbadger did the photographer come to your house for the actual party?  Or did you go to the studio with the smash cake?  I'm curious about ththe logistics, as we are still deciding where to hold hers...  feel free to share pics, too, pls!  I hope you had a wonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderfwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderfuonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderfwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderwonwondwonwondewonwondwonwonderful day! (Lol gotta love the bump glitches.  I'm leaving it.)

    Also, we have a crawler!  So that's a whole new fun thing. :blush:

    We tried pb shortly after 6 months, as per the Pediatrician, and then eggs I think happened around 7m, but I wasn't even thinking about them as an allergen. 🤷‍♀️ Luckily she has tolerated everything we've offered just fine, although she has shown certain preferences from day to day, which is neat.  Sometimes I am just not feeling this or that either, even tho normally i like it, too!  So we just keep it moving and I haven't really seen anything I would consider pickiness either (yet).  She loves trying new things!  I just struggle to get 3 solid meals in on the weekends.  It's so much easier sending the food to school all week, so that's something to work on for Sundays when we are all together. 

    We had a brief bout of HFM recently, which thankfully is over, apart from a wee lingering cough.  Poor thing.  And mommy's horrific sinus infection.  Yuck.  Can. Not. Be over this soon enough.

    I have been tapering off pumping as well... I wish our whole BF journey had gone differently but it is what it is, and it was absolutely wonderful and precious while it lasted.  I start my new role soon (with a longer commute), so not asking to take breaks to pump with my new (male) manager will make things easier for one, and hopefully help me get a bit more much-needed sleep, too.  We'll see how it goes.  Any tips for tapering off / stopping pumping?  I dont have a huge supply anyway, but I still don't want to get blocked ducts or anything.

    So, that part makes me sad, but as many of us are at or approaching a year, is anyone thinking about TFAS any time soonish?  Or are most of us done here?

    Happy news - I appear to have lost the pregnancy weight!!!  Officially down a good 33 lb, which I gained either 33 or 38 depending how you count it, so I'll take it as a WIN!!!  more or less halfway to my goal of where I'd like to be prior to our next transfer, i.e. getting back to pre-ivf weight, so hopefully I'll be on a roll from here on out.  Wish me luck!
  • @BusinessWife
    Grats on dropping the preggo pounds!! For me, I have to work on getting off my post-preggo pounds because my doctor put me back on a medicine (abilify) that causes me to gain weight. It was mostly done for concern re: PPD/PPA but I've been off it for almost a month now and trying to work on getting back to normal size-wise. I have my birthday this weekend so I'm off the wagon but I'll be back on starting next week :smile:

    We are personally done -- partly because that was always our plan (1 kiddo) and my husband is practical about finances. If I'm staying home and only working from home, we can't really offer the opportunities that are important to us to two kiddos. In our area, private school is a must and we want to make sure we can return to France ASAP once she's big enough. We eventually plan on living there at least part-time (summer and holidays).  I also consider our cycle sorta as "closure" -- at 34, my AMH was 0.62, we only got 5 fertilized eggs and ended up with just 2 day 6 blasts. We beat all the odds and wound up with both implanting, a vanishing twin and a healthy little girl. I'm not sure I want to try those odds again! I also had severe pre-E at the very end and I don't want to risk my health when I have a little girl to take care of. 
    ~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
    Fall 2012 -- started TTC
    Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
    Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
    September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
    Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
    June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
    August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
    September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
    March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

    TTC #2
    January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
    March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


    "When all is lost then all is found."


  • Wow yes, that is a lot to go through! @mbradfo2. I can see you having closure the way it all went down, and totally feel for you not wanting to go through it all again from scratch.  That must be wonderful to feel like your family is complete now, and you have your prize!

    My bff also with v. low amh got three eggs, one not mature, two day 3 blasts transferred fresh, one stuck, and that's it!  We always wanted a bigger family, but if our situation had gone similarly, I am pretty sure DH would not want me to go through it again, either.  But he has his own reasons.

    We do have embies waiting, which the plan is to eventually transfer all.  Not sure if we will stay with eSET as the plan, or eventually try two as I am not getting any younger!  Time will tell... I guess I wish I had my crystal ball sometimes when it comes to this stuff.
  • mtpbadgermtpbadger member
    edited June 2019
    @businesswife we went to the photographers studio and brought the smash cake with and also had some family photos done at the same time. She has the option of coming to your house or anywhere else (park, etc) and brings any props and stuff with her as well but it was just easier for us to go there. We had our newborn photos done with her and I’m really happy with all the pictures she’s taken so far. 

    For pumping, start with the pump that gives you the least amount during the day and slowly decrease the time you pump until you feel comfortable stopping (for me it’s about a 5-7 days but some people can drop it completely within 3-4) and then move on to another session. Most people drop the morning pump last since that one typically yields the most ounces and dropping that one first can lead to clogs. I’m currently working on dropping my before bed pump and then will work on the morning. It was a huge mental challenge to want to see less ounces each time and I’m still sort of sad about stopping completely but am also really looking forward to being done and getting more time in the day!

    I think we are going to contact our RE sometime in August to start another FET. We have two embryos remaining and I really want a sibling for Abigail so am willing to do another retrieval if needed as well but am hoping it doesn’t come to that. I would try sooner but DH has convinced me to just enjoy the summer, no shots, no appointments and since I’ll be done pumping soon, to let my body just relax for a little bit. 
  • @mtpbadger
    It must be exciting to be thinking about starting another FET cycle and potential bebe!  I think I would feel less confident in our decision to be one and done if Anne didn't have two cousins close in age (2 yrs and 5 yrs) just down the road. She spends a good deal of time with them and all three girls are quickly becoming as thick as thieves. Of course, the 5 year old plays the role of big sister (and boss) to everyone! It's been lovely watching them interact and become close. I imagine in a few years we'll be having sleepovers galore and movie dates! Once we are done with our addition, I look forward to hosting more get togethers with them -- right now we simply don't have the space so I either go over to my sister's house or we gather at my parents' place. 
    ~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
    Fall 2012 -- started TTC
    Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
    Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
    September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
    Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
    June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
    August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
    September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
    March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

    TTC #2
    January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
    March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


    "When all is lost then all is found."


  • @mbradfo2 exciting and terrifying! I first have to talk with my OB to discuss if I’m at a higher risk of preterm labor since Abigail was early before moving forward at all. 
  • Hi ladies! Hope everyone is well and excited for summer. My twins are 13 months and time is flying! My son is walking short distances and my daughter started taking a couple steps. We had a blast celebrating their birthday- the theme was love you to the moon and back. We are hoping for 2-3 more kids so didn't waste much time and just transferred 2 embryos in May. We are lucky to still have 4 remaining. I have my beta on Tues! I pumped until 10 months and had to stop 3 months before the FET. 10 months was good for me as they were getting more mobile and it got challenging. I've been so lucky to stay home with my kids during the week and I work some weekends (I'm a nurse) so I get the best of both worlds. Prayers for you all as/if you plan for more babies. And have an amazing summer!!
  • @mtpbadger. How exciting!  I hope your ob tells you theres no worry necessarily about being high risk.  As for pumping, I am basically down to max two a day, some days even just one, either AM or PM.  I am only getting about an ounce a time anyway, even pumping for 20-30 min.  Days I've gone without pumping at all all day even, I haven't even had any problems with being uncomfortable or getting a block.  The kicker is, I was just prescribed an abx that 1. Should probably be pumped and dumped if I were still actively trying to nurse and 2. Is also used to treat mastitis! Lol so... just sort of wondering if this is a good opportunity to taper to like a short pump either AM or PM, dump whatever I get, and call it. :/

    @mbradfo2. How wonderful to have cousins so close, and so close in age!  That really is a gift.  Our family is more spread out now, which we wish everyone were closer, but what can you do.  You and Anne are so lucky!

    @doubleblessings1124  wow, brave lady jumping right onthe transfer with twins at home! GL with your beta!!!
  • cashewchickencashewchicken member
    edited June 2019
    @Hopeful_mom yay! Your daughter is turning one! It’s always exciting to celebrate the first birthday, even if you aren’t doing anything big (we didn’t). I felt like I wanted to give myself a pat on the back for us surviving our first year. 

    @mbradfo2 My son is getting the hang of walking too. Fewer and fewer stumbles. Now he is climbing onto the sofa and also learned how to get down from it too. A first word! That’s so exciting. My son started saying “Eyyyy!” to get people’s attention a few months ago and last weekend, I heard him say “bye bye” really quietly, twice while we were saying goodbye to my MIL over face time. But he hasn’t repeated it since. At school he apparently told his teacher “all done” after finishing his lunch, twice, but we haven’t been able to get him to say it at home. Not sure at this point if he is saying anything with a purpose or just babbling. 

    @BusinessWife Congrats on your weight loss! I’m hoping to try for #2 this year, but for that to happen I need to stop breastfeeding completely, which I am still struggling to do. My RE will not begin treatment until 3 cycles after I have fully stopped breastfeeding. I’ve managed to finally cut my son off of MOTN feedings so now he nurses at night before bed and once in the morning after 5am. The plan is to fully stop by the end of this month. I’m old (turning 41 this month. Ugh) so I don’t have the luxury to space out my kids. We have 3 PGS-rested embryos waiting for us, so hopefully one of the three will be our #2. In the mean time, I need to work on myself so that I’ll be healthy going into the next pregnancy. I’m prediabetic and I haven’t been able to stick to my diet. With nursing I’m hungry all the time and the late night snacks definitely didn’t help (and afternoon snacks too... yikes).
    Me: 41  DH: 46
    Unexplained infertility/AMA, polycystic ovaries, insulin resistance
    FET#1(July 2017): eSET of first of 4 PGS-normal embryos, DS born 3/30/2018
    FET#2(Oct/Nov 2019): eSET  
  • @mtpbadger I agree with your husband, you should enjoy the summer! That’s what I plan to do, too. I’m going to enjoy the summer free of shots and I’m going to eat up all the sushi I can before the next pregnancy (if I’m lucky enough to conceive again that is). 

    @doubleblessings1124 Wow! I’m amazed that you had another FET (2 blasts!!) soon after you had your twins! Where do you find the energy to do it all? I said earlier that I want to have another, but there’s a small part of me questioning whether I’m ready for that. Sometimes I’m so exhausted with just one.  
    Me: 41  DH: 46
    Unexplained infertility/AMA, polycystic ovaries, insulin resistance
    FET#1(July 2017): eSET of first of 4 PGS-normal embryos, DS born 3/30/2018
    FET#2(Oct/Nov 2019): eSET  
  • @cashewchicken mine is the same, from what I remember, so that is something that helps me cope a little with our abbreviated BF journey as it happened.  Not what I had hoped for, but i did hope to be able to try again fairly soon, so maybe everything happens the way it's supposed to?  Idk.  I have my consult later this month, and cd3 testing at least, so that will provide a good starting point.  And I hear you on being exhausted! The working mom thing is such a grind, but I'm hoping my new position may offer some more work/life balance in certain respects.  That remains to be seen tho! Lol. What's your biggest challenge right now?
  • @BusinessWife That’s great that you are moving ahead with testing. And it’s great that your new position might offer more work/life balance! 

    I think the the biggest challenge right now for me is time management. That’s always been the problem (I’m a procrastinator) but lately there are more responsibilities to juggle and I’m just not doing a good job at anything. Before my son it was just the two of us so we lived pretty lazy lives, barely cooking (eating out mostly) and cleaning the house whenever we felt like it. Now it’s rush rush rush to feed him, bathe him, read to him before putting him to bed before it gets too late. Half the time I pass out with my son so the house is in a bit of disarray and I don’t get to make more toddler friendly meals like I had planned to (I hate cooking so maybe ‘passing out’ is my excuse not to do it ;p). I’ve never been that efficient at doing housework and it shows. Also being out of shape and not loving my work are adding to the frustration as well. 
    Me: 41  DH: 46
    Unexplained infertility/AMA, polycystic ovaries, insulin resistance
    FET#1(July 2017): eSET of first of 4 PGS-normal embryos, DS born 3/30/2018
    FET#2(Oct/Nov 2019): eSET  
  • edited June 2019
    Yeah, it's a lot.  I hear DH complaining what are we doing wrong with our lives that we have no real downtime to just relax it seems, and watch grownup shows before we pass out.  Even now, I'm sitting here on the couch bumping, picking at a crazy late supper that's half homemade salad, half chicken and sides DH picked up. 🤷‍♀️ we have an agreement for now that we are going to try to do more meal planning and prep on the weekends, but not beat ourselves up - just communicate - if someone has to stop and grab something easy on the way home, it's all good.  I find myself picking up handfuls of doghair and just throwing it out, so much more often than I actually run the vaccuum.  Etc. Etc. It is what it is, life with a baby / toddler in the house.

    One thing I'm trying as of this week is sending more food to school. At 8.5m we are ramping up to three meals and two snacks, but when I sent two meals, it would feel like one more thing to do in the evening - stop somehow and feed her dinner right away before bedtime got too late.  but invariably it takes so much time to just get home, drop our things, wash bottles, change her, change ourselves, put dinner on the table etc. that I decided it's just not worth it.  So now if they give her all three meals, we'll try to have a snack when she gets home, and eventually send something more for her school snacks, too.  Like I mean, she could legit have all three meals at 8, 12, 4, plus snacks at 10 and 2, and all I'd have to do at home is wash her containers and/or have a third snack at 6/630 before bedtime- or not.  But I don't try to reinvent the wheel.  We have a basic menu for the week and that's what she gets.  See how the week goes and tweak the plan for the following. What kind of meals are toddler friendly for you? Vs, what you guys are normally eating?  Would it help to whip up a batch of his stuff at once and then dole / portion it out for him, so you don't feel like you're constantly cooking?

    Would you ever consider getting a robot vaccuum?  Or hiring a cleaning lady? Or trying grocery pickup to save time at the store? (That's another one we're about to try.)

    It's definitely a lot, I just take the approach like each week, each day, we are just going to try and get better at it in some way, kwim?  (((Hugs)))
  • @cashewchicken I feel like one year in we are just starting to figure it all out and get into somewhat of a good routine where DH and I have a little bit of time to relax in the evening. It does help now that Abigail mostly feeds herself dinner and we can all sit down together - it gives us a chance to catch up on how our days went.

    Food - ugh. Its both easier and harder now that I have to figure out what food Abigail is taking to daycare. Sunday night I'll hard boil a bunch of eggs and send that as breakfast along with toast/jelly; a waffle or yogurt and fruit. Lunch for her is usually leftovers from dinner the night before. Abigail eats what we eat for dinner 90% of the time. We keep dinner pretty easy - lots of Trader Joes frozen veggies and usually fish or chicken. Fajitas is always an easy one too. Now that Abigail is eating what we eat, our doing take-out has gone down considerably, which is good! We mostly eat the same thing week to week. And there are some nights where Abigail gets some cut up cheese and a peanut butter sandwhich b/c I'm too tired to cook. I am not against throwing some chicken nuggets in the oven for her or making some mac and cheese either if DH and I want to do take-out. I try and make enough so that not only are there enough left overs for her to take for lunch but it gets DH and I at least one more night of dinner. We'll have one night where we just clean out the fridge of leftovers for the week. I do try and meal plan so I roughly know what I'm making each night. Helps me not just say "F it, I'm too tired to think of what to make, let's order something". 

    I work from home on Mondays and have started sending Abigail to daycare for most of the day (it was TOO hard to keep her home any longer since she's become more mobile, I wasn't getting any work done). I use that day to do all laundry, clean our place and do a little bit of meal prep. I still have laundry (clean!) sitting on my floor from 3 weeks ago so it's not perfect. 

    Abigail has a thing for the vacuum so I try and make it a game with her if I need to vacuum - chase her around and then let her chase me/vacuum. It allows me to at least get some housework done while she's awake. DH and I will try and take 15 min each night and focus on one thing to clean, whether it be dust, put laundry away, etc. We also switch off on putting her to bed so the one that's not is in charge of cleaning the kitchen and getting her food ready for the next day. 


  • @cashewchicken I so happy that breast feeding worked so well for you and wish you luck on the weaning process. I'm not sure but once he's weaned I wouldn't at all be surprised if your energy level bounced back some. Breastfeeding/pumping is hard work and it takes time out of our days. Once your little guy is weaned reassess how you are feeling, especially once you find your new rhythm.
  • @cashewchicken
    I'm the same way -- major procrastinator and it's definitely been MUCH worse since baby arrived. I often feel like I can't do anything right or on-time. If I focus on work, stuff at home gets neglected and vice versa. I'm constantly working on it and every time I get ahead, something comes up and I get thrown back behind again! I am also prone to light-sensitive migraines which can make working on a computer impossible -- everyone understands but it does mean I have catch up to do once the migraine passes. 

    I also have the special privilege of working from home most days (3 half days in the office) and Anne's at home with me so it's a constant struggle to actually accomplish work during the day. Hubby also gets home late so I do double dinners -- I make Anne's for her at a regular hour (5) and then our big person dinner is usually 7 pm or so...but Anne's bedtime is getting pushed back to 8 regularly now so she's getting upset about not having our dinner at 7! Last night she started crying over pork tenderloin....DH gave her some snacks and a taste or two of his dinner but this is definitely becoming an issue. Anne really can't wait until 7 pm for dinner....I guess I could give her snacks instead of dinner at 5?
    ~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
    Fall 2012 -- started TTC
    Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
    Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
    September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
    Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
    June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
    August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
    September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
    March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

    TTC #2
    January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
    March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


    "When all is lost then all is found."


  • I think I picked everyone's brain on this, but what are your favorite shoes for new walkers? And how did you size? I'm struggling to find a pair that fits Anne -- Target barely has any 4's and the 5's just slide off her feet when she walks which is less than ideal...I need to try the 4's on her but I've been hesitant since I know DH will not like the price of the brands that had 4's at Target (they were the pricier shoes at 35-40 dollars), so I've been hoping to find something on amazon or elsewhere. 
    ~~ Our Story in Spoiler! TW loss/child~~
    Fall 2012 -- started TTC
    Summer 2015 - no BFP yet, labs normal, referred to RE
    Fall 2015 - Summer 2016 - Further testing all normal. 3 IUI's -- BFN. Recommended move to IVF. Planned cycle for fall 2016.
    September 2016 - Surprise natural BFP. MMC @ 8 weeks. RE expressed confidence that we just needed the 'right' embryo.
    Fall 2016 - Spring 2017 -- Break from TTC
    June 2017 - Started IVF; egg retrieval for freeze all cycle. 9 mature eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized. 2 4BB embies on ice.
    August 2017 - FET transfer both embies. BFP.  Twin pregnancy confirmed by ultrasound. EDD 4/28/18
    September 2017 - Twin B stopped developing; Twin A doing perfectly! Graduated from RE @ 10 weeks
    March 2018 - Baby Girl born via C/S due to pre-eclampsia -- strong and healthy!

    TTC #2
    January/Feb 2021 - Freeze-all IVF cycle 
    March 2021 - FET of 1 PGS normal female embryo. BFP! Beta #1 156,  #2 472, #3 1241, #4 5268 EDD 12/5/21 - Christmas baby!


    "When all is lost then all is found."


  • @mbradfo2 The twins eat at 6:30 or so due to our summer 10 hour work day. Day care gives them a decent snack (fruit +protein) at 4:30-5 to help. They are still going to bed between 7:30-8. This schedule might be adjusted after we go back to 8 hour days, they play outside a lot right now so come home pretty dirty and need baths. This pushed bedtime back this week one day and we missed their bedtime "window" and paid for it throughout the night. Its a frustrating give and take. I will say that I've given up on a picked up house, I settle for a not gross house and do a more thorough cleaning 2-3 times per month when their Maman comes to watch the twins during a weekend day. At the end of my thought process it was just more important for me to spend that extra time playing and enjoying them during this time, especially with working 10 hour days.
  • @BusinessWife thanks for the well wishes I did get good news! Have to wait a couple weeks to find out if we have 1 baby or 2 again. I definitely can relate with you all on being tired! Things definitely got easier as pumping was done, we got rid of bottles at 1, mainly self feeding like others have said.  I know things will get way crazier as they start running around, the toddler years, adding another kid(s) but it's all part of parenthood and time just seems to fly so i just embrace it and enjoy it as much as I can. I think having had to go through hell for our kids we are more grateful and complain less. I know some moms that are like woe is me I never have time for myself or always ranting about their kids. Parenthood isn't supposed to be easy and it really is a gift!! 
  • Wow! @doubleblessings1124 Congrats!  Keep us posted how it goes at your scans, please! 

    I am only a handful of days off pumping and I'm already starting to feel some measure of relief about my mornings, and helping me get to bed sooner in the evening too.
  • Hi all. I'm sorry I've been MIA, the bump hasn't been working for me. 

    Congrats @doubleblessings1124! That is both scary and exciting!

    For all y'all  concerned about the housekeeping, I  can tell you that it doesn't really get better, but eventually a rhythm  does come about. I will say that since Matthew has been born, I've been super lax about it. Mostly because life with a three year old and an almost 8 month old is hard! 

    Matthew unintentionally had pb. Ds1 left part of his uneaten waffle on the floor, and I didn't realize. I came back from using the bathroom and there was Matthew  eating it. It really is true that all parenting horror stories start out with I was only gone for a second...

    I think about y'all often and, hopefully, now that things seem to be working for me, I can check in more often. 
  • I know it’s june but just wanted to leave a big congrats to @doubleblessings1124 u r a warrior how exciting best of luck and keep us posted!did u have to stop bf before your FET, and for how long? 

    @cashewchicken don’t be hard on yourself u have a happy and healthy baby which is most important! Everything else will fall into place which is what I remind myself too!!! I hear you on not being able to shace things out as time isn’t on my side but since I’m ahead of you just know you’re still good!!! I was 42 when I delivered.  Will see if I’ll be able for another.  I worked so hard to bank them that I would like to try even though I am so exhausted!!!!
    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

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