IF Testing and Treatment w/o 4/29

inthewoods23 · April 2019

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation.

Diagnosis (if you've been):

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):

How are things going?:

Any questions?:

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through?

kbrown2385 · April 2019

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained rpl

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): wto

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): clomid with monitoring followed by progesterone after o

How are things going?: good so far. Scan tomorrow to see how I’m responding to clomid.

Any questions?: I feel like we are having better hio sessions with the clomid, like my body is doing what it’s supposed to. Is that normal?

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through? So many lol. I’ve never seen Jurassic Park all the way through, never seen any of braveheart, the shining. The list is so long, there are so many more.

ruby696 · April 2019

@kbrown2385 Good luck tomorrow!!

Diagnosis (if you've been): Early stage DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Follistim and IUI

How are things going?: Eh, BFN at 12dpiui, so...🤷‍♀️

Any questions?: I have one 600IU cartridge of follistim left. This cycle, I did six days at 175IU. We're going to stop treatment with the RE after this cycle, so I'm wondering if it would be crazy/stupid/irresponsible to use 100IU of follistim for six days without monitoring, with the thought that maybe the lower dose will still help. I only had one follie with the higher dose, so I'm not worried about hyperstimulation, but I won't have progesterone or a trigger, so i don't know if there would be any point. Okay, that was long - sorry!

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through? All of the Godfather movies.

emmasemm · April 2019

@kbrown2385 Meds always give me crazy amounts of CM which makes things very easy for HIO plus the natural estrogen rise (not the artificial from patches) makes me more in the mood!

@ruby696 hmmm tricky one. Did you use anything to delay ovulation like a cetrotide or anything in your cycles along with the follistim? If yes, then probably wouldn’t be good as you might O too early before the follicle is mature. But that’s kind of the worst I could see for you - a wasted cycle...
However what you do want to make sure at baseline is that you don’t have a cyst as some of them are responsive and you don’t want one growing unchecked.
So probably not advisable, but for DOR patients probably low risk overall...
What date is on it? I had some with more than 6 month dates so you might want to see if you have a chance to use it in a later cycle...

Diagnosis (if you've been): DOR AMA Adenomyosis Autoimmune stuff

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): We had the polyps removed this cycle, had the consult with the RE and agreed to start FET prep with the next cycle (which should start any day now). Nurse consult is Thursday to go through the detailed schedule and get my prescriptions etc

How are things going?:
Last week DH and I had a few days off for Easter weekend, then the following week. We are still off until Thursday as Wednesday is a public holiday.
Did we go somewhere nice? Nope... instead DH has completely dug up our garden with the help of our neighbor. As in removed all turf, all trees and bushes and plants. Today there are some guys laying a concrete base for the new fence on one side. We’ve had several day trips - around showrooms for terrace tiles, steps, terrace walls, stones to cap walls... The birds are loving all the worms and ice stuff for nest building though!
Oh and I’ve been working through the SCD Intro diet and now in phase 1. Going cold turkey on all the chocolate and gluten free bread is tough but we are leaving no stone unturned for this FET. So I’m in full on meal prepping madness to make sure I don’t slip off it when I go back to work!

Any questions?:

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through?
I have also never seen The Shining all the way through, but this is because with very scary movies I tend to have to walk away or switch off. I have watched the end of it. Just missed a whole chunk in the middle ;-)
I could list quite a few horror or thriller movies like this...

celticknotfire · April 2019

@kbrown2385 GL tomorrow! I don't remember a big difference with the Clomid but since it's stimulates hormones I think it makes sense.

@ruby696 I am so sorry about the BFN. That's a really interesting question about the follistim. One hand I would be nervous about taking it without monitoring but on the other hand you already know how your body responds. Did you ever ovulate on your own?

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS, anovulatory, AMA

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFFET/benched

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Benched until end of May when we will start the process for FET

How are things going?: I'm feeling better physically and most of the swelling is gone so I'm starting to feel normal. My RE wants me to continue to take it easy for another week or so just to be safe. We got the results of our PGT-A and out of 6 embryos 2 were normal. One came back without enough material to provide a proper analysis. We are mixed because we are happy that we got 2 but disappointed we only got 2.

Any questions?: Our RE gave us the option to re-biopsy the one embryo that they didn't get enough of a sample the first time. The issue is that they have to thaw and then refreeze it. Is it worth the risk?

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through? I may get flamed for this but all of the Star Wars movies. They just don't interest me for some reason.

emmasemm · April 2019

@celticknotfire congratulations on your two normal embryos!
I know it’s a weird feeling to be happy yet disappointed at the same time.
I don’t remember how old you are?
Did your abnormals have anything in common?

And did your report differentiate between mosaics and abnormals?
Regarding the one with no result - will your clinic still allow you to transfer it without more testing? Some will and some won’t. If they won’t transfer it without re-testing then I would say it’s worth the risk to defrost and test and refreeze. If not, can you wait and see if the other two are successful first and only defrost, re-biopsy and refreeze if really needed? Both for risk and money purposes. And in case you would do a second retrieval you could have it defrosted etc to send off with the new embryos...
Also what quality is that embryo? If it’s poor quality it would have a lower chance to survive the process as those don’t tend to re-expand so well.

inthewoods23 · April 2019

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): benched?

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Finishing up first round of BCP. Going back on 18 pills next week, then stims for IVF.

How are things going?: feeling a little better in the pocket boom since it appears my RE has generics prescribed. Which reminds me that I need to give them a call since I have questions!

Any questions?: Not for you ladies 🙂

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through?
I have yet to see Frozen and a number of other animated movies. I heard Big Hero 6 was really good and want to see it! I also haven't seen a large number of the Avenger movies.

ruby696 · April 2019

@emmasemm and @celticknotfire It's pure follistim and I have no issues ovulating. The cyst issue is something I hadn't considered, so I think I'll check the expiration date and maybe skip a cycle. Thanks for the feedback!

@emmanemm Yard renovations are so exciting! Feel free to share progress pics if you're comfortable doing so.

@celticknotfire Congrats on your two embryos! Will you transfer both at the same time?

@inthewoods23 It's pretty much May, so you're getting closer - I am so excited for you!

kbrown2385 · April 2019

@celticknotfire great news about the two embryos!
Glad you’re healing well!

@emmasemm what is the scd diet? I love yard work! I hope it all turns out the way you want. Exciting youre getting started with FET prep soon!

@inthewoods23 so glad the cost for meds is lower than you were anticipating.

begging4abump · April 2019

Diagnosis (if you've been): not yet; ttc since May 2018

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): benched wto

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): stp tomorrow 😬 and endometrial biopsy next week.

How are things going?: Roller coaster of emotions. Right now, I’m ok. I got a book about learning how to wait, and it’s helping a bit. Still not sure if/how my husband will be submitting a sample for sa, but trying to not dwell on it too much. And nervous about upcoming appointments. I’m planning to ask if they have my cd3 results tomorrow. I went in a tailspin finding results from my gp’s routine testing in November where my a/g ratio was high; google was not my friend, so I’m ignoring it and waiting to see cd3 results and hear the re’s analysis of them.

Any questions?: I don’t think so

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through? Spider-Man is the first that comes to mind, but most action movies probably. I’m known to fall asleep during movies in general.

@kbrown2385 Glad you and YH have been getting some noticeable benefits from the meds! Also, fellow GoT watcher here! Things are happening on a faster timeline than I expected with that show!

@ruby696 sorry about the bfn and not having any knowledge to share about the meds. I hope someone else is able to give you some answers.

@emmasemm I’d love to see before and afters of your yard if you’re willing to share! Good luck with all the food preps; that’s a big change and i admire your commitment to doing all you can!

@celticknotfire I’m glad you’re feeling better and that you’ve got 2 good ones! Sorry about the conflicting feelings.

@inthewoods23 hooray for a cheaper option that works just as well! Also, belated happiness about entering your 30s!

celticknotfire · April 2019

@emmasemm I'm 37 and **TW** we did have a loss that was due to a "chromosomal abnormality"**end TW** so that's why we did the testing to begin with. We didn't go over the full report my RE just called me at home because she just got the results and wanted to give me some good news (her words) and give us time to think about what to do about the 3rd one. If we decide to retest it there is no charge so that's one less thing to worry about at least. We don't know the grades of the remaining embryos or why the others were abnormal. Unfortunately we don't think we can afford to do more than one retrieval because of costs. Thank you so much for giving me some things to think about and to ask my RE at our next appointment! I'm so happy you will be starting your FET process soon!!!!

@inthewoods23 you are getting close! I hate how much waiting is involved in IF!

@begging4abump I don't know if you answered this yet but is your RE willing to do a treatment without a SA? Also if you do have to progress to things like IUI and IVF I don't know how YH can give a sample any other way. I can only imagine what a difficult decision this is for the both of you.

emmasemm · April 2019

@inthewoods23 I meant to ask last week, why on earth have you been on BC will come for a few days and then go on it again straight away? I can’t seem to think of a medical necessity to do that but interested to learn!

@ruby696 do you have a local OB that will do a baseline scan for you each month? I found one that is very willing for a nominal fee (30 euros) and they give me all the photos (which I have put in a photo album this holiday!!!). So even on my waiting cycles I know what I’m working with. I also go in just prior to O to check follicle size etc as I’m basically some kind of TVUS addict by now it seems...

@begging4abump I saw an article linked from an instagram post last week about a big fertility Centre offering options for sperm samples (either for testing or use in IUI/IVF). They had some special condom like things to collect it in - but not with regular HIO due to high risk of contamination. They did allow wives in the room though. And several practices will allow you to “provide” the sample at home if you can get it to them within a certain time. I think it’s important to have that discussion with your RE or look for a urologist who is willing to handle it.

@celticknotfire - normally you should be entitled to talk with a genetic counsellor or specialist about the results from the PGT-A Testing. Very important is if they can spot any repeating patterns in the abnormals. And if they don’t report mosaics they should tell you what the threshold is they used for normal and abnormal. This can be very different from lab to lab. Sometimes having mosaics reported is only an option - but it’s important how complex and frequent the abnormality is and you should be able to ask for them to reissue the report to include mosaicsism.
If you have any questions before your RE appointment feel free to give me a PM any time.

inthewoods23 · April 2019

@emmasemm they have me on an extra 18 days of BC because of their down period. I don't mind it at all because that made this March a month of just naturally trying and now this month is a benched month being on BC. It puts our retrieval into mid June and FET in July which actually is way better timing for us. March is our busy competition month for the program DH and I mentor so a FET in June would put a due date smack in the middle of all that next year. Early to mid April works way better for us so I'm totally fine with having to wait til July for our FET.

nitnat007 · April 2019

@kbrown2385 Hope you have a great scan tomorrow.

@ruby696 Sorry to hear about the bfn. Are you scheduled for a blood test too? Take care of you!

@emmasemm Sometimes staying home and doing things like that is just as good as taking vacation! Its good for the soul. You will have to keep us posted on how the diet goes. Cutting sugar and carbs is such a tough one for me too. Hope your family are doing ok.

@celticknotfire Really glad to hear that you are feeling more like yourself. The end of May will be here before you know it! Congrats on those 2 embabies!

@inthewoods23 Sending so many positive vibes your way for IVF. Always a little bit of a relief when you can save some cash here and there. Meds are expensive.

@begging4abump Step away from Google! Every case is generally so specific, you can spiral so quickly. Hope that YH is able to figure out the SA and gets it done for you. GL!

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): On our own still

How are things going?: Things are ok. I have gotten MH to book in for his another SA, next Friday. Those results will likely take some time before we get them though. I have mixed emotions about it, on one hand I want there to be an improvement so that our chances are better. On the other, if they are just slightly worse, then insurance would kick in on some of the costs. Ideally I would love to not have to go through IVF again, but I am realistic.

Any questions?:

GTKY: what's a popular movie that you have never seen all the way through? Like @emmasemm there are plenty of scary movies that I have not finished. I watch those from between my fingers, or staring at MH to gauge his reaction. But most recently we tried watching "You were never really here" with Joaquinn Phoenix (normally pretty good), and man it was just odd. We watched way more than we should have trying to give it a fair shot.

celticknotfire · April 2019

@emmasemm I already planned on asking to see the report and I'm pretty sure my RE was going to show it to me anyway. I even thought about calling the company and asking them if they can send it to me as well.

@nitnat007 tough call for the SA results! Improvement is always great but so is saving some money. If you do have to do IVF do you think they will change your protocol from last time?

nitnat007 · April 2019

@celticknotfire I think that there will be a slightly different approach when we go through our next cycle. I am going to push for them to try and get as many eggs as possible, which would run the risk over over stimulating, but we can not afford to do this again. I know our clinic has taken similar approaches with other patients, and given we would be doing FET not fresh, I would want to take the risk.

begging4abump · April 2019

@nitnat007 I hope the sa results are crazy good. Sorry you have to wait so long to find out!
@celticknotfire & @emmasemm Thanks for the tips. Dh did call to see what more unconventional options we have. And when I called the re receptionist, she said we could still follow through with my end of things even if mh doesn’t provide a sample. But hopefully he does...

So I got back from my stp, and I seem to have 1 blocked tube. They’re trying to schedule me in for an X-ray on Thursday to confirm. 😔 I guess I’m glad that maybe we’ll find some answers, but scared about what exactly those answers are. And trying to decide how much to google...

inthewoods23 · April 2019

UGH whirlwind of emotion! The online pharmacy I go through for my meds called and she's like "you're paying OOP for your meds", "the prescription coverage you have only covers things like tablets, etc.". I told her I've gone online and it says it's covered. I already knew the trigger shot was not, I never had issue with that. She said she would send this over to their insurance group to check it out and to expect a call back by tomorrow.

A few minutes later she actually calls back and it turns out the meds ARE covered, I just have to go through a specific pharmacy - Freedom Pharmacy.

PHEW PHEW PHEW

celticknotfire · April 2019

@nitnat007 that makes total sense. It's crazy that we have to make these medical decisions based on cost not what is best for our bodies!

@begging4abump that's good that they will still follow through. Sounds like they are going to do an HSG which many of us have gone through. My recommendation is to take some ibuprofen before the procedure because I had a blocked tube and it was painful.

@inthewoods23 that is awesome that they are going to cover them! I use Freedom and they have been amazing! They are always so nice and helpful every time I call. Also they include alcohol swabs, gauze and a sharps container for free with every order.

kbrown2385 · April 2019

@inthewoods23 fantastic news about the meds! I’ve heard a lot of people use freedom pharmacy and I’ve never heard complaints.

@begging4abump finding something wrong is like a double edged sword. You want something to fix but you also want to be healthy. Easier said than done I know but stay off google. It'll make you crazy.

Just got back from my scan. My lining looks great which I’m happy about. I was concerned it would be too thin from the clomid. I have 2 follicles on the right measuring 27mm and 25mm. Another on the left is measuring at 21mm. I’m so relieved and my re said she feels comfortable moving forward. I also got my peak opk right before I left for the appt so it’s game on now. Thankfully we have good timing leading up to today. I’ll start progesterone on Friday. The re also said if we need another cycle of clomid she will decrease the dose. Idk how I feel about that.

inthewoods23 · May 2019

Wow what a comedy show just to get IVF meds. I get a call from the pharmacy I need to go through now and it's just an automated message that basically tells you to call their patient care team at (number). I wasn't even prepared so I couldn't write it down! Thankfully the original pharmacy gave me their number just in case so I'll have to call them back tomorrow since I left the number at work and I'm home sick today.

emmasemm · May 2019

@kbrown2385 wow those are three great follicles! And really good that your lining was affected.
I guess she is nervous about higher order multiples. So it’s for your health she would lower the dose. (And her licence...)
Though to be honest with those three I have very high hopes for this cycle for you. You’re like the text book patient!
SCD is “Specific Carbohydrate Diet”. It’s not everyone’s preferred approach, but it works well for me. Or at least has done in the past. However I slipped off it after meeting DH as he loves to cook. For me it’s good as I have quite a few food intolerances and it allows me to double check what I’m eating causes no reactions (as it can change over time). It’s not designed to lose weight, but of course if you don’t eat chips and chocolate then you naturally lose some in the first months. If you’re looking for anti-inflammatory it’s a great one to use. And my RE approved me doing it (and staying on phase 3 only if needed mid-long term).
TW kids

If anyone has kids (or partners) with ADHD or similar then it is often used to try to identify trigger foods for behavioral issues too. Several major hospitals have programs supporting its use.

@inthewoods23 that won’t be the last heartstopping moment of IVF but seriously you don’t need added heart attacks! Pleased it worked out well.
And ahha just for timing makes sense. I don’t think you have too much risk of being over suppressed so should be nice and quiet to start - and at least not risk having any cysts at baseline!

@begging4abump well that’s why we do these tests to check for these things. Glad you can get in quick for HSG and then have more of an idea. I hope they should try to see not only if that one is blocked but if it is a hydrosalpinx as that makes leaving it there not such a good idea. They do have quite a few false positives with both stp and HSG though so you might see next week it looks clear!

@nitnat007 thanks for asking about my family. My sister is doing ok, tough but recovering well. And my grandfather is back home since Monday evening - he has a small annex on the ground floor of my parents house. He has carers to take care of him during the day and McMillan nurses come every day too as he is now bed bound, but happy to be home. Mid of last week his Dr allowed my father to take whiskey to the hospital so he could have a glass before bed every night and they reckon that made him improve enough to come home! At 93, 20 years after a serious stroke and with lungs filled with clots as well as seemingly riddled with cancer throughout his intestinal tract then I guess a glass of whiskey every night isn’t going to make things any worse than they already are! His Dr said whatever he wants to do or eat or drink just let him.
I don’t know whether to hope for a better or slightly worse SA for you...

kbrown2385 · May 2019

@emmasemm it makes sense she’d decrease it to lower the risk of multiples, especially since I don’t normally have an issue ovulating. I’m trying not to get my hopes too high, but I left the office yesterday feeling very confident with such good results. I can only keep my fx hoping it’s a chromosomal normal egg if this round works.

That is interesting about the diet. I’m going to have to look into it more!

Edit forgot stuff

begging4abump · May 2019

I don’t really know what I’m hoping for posting here. Maybe I’m hoping ppl have magical ways of making me feel like this isn’t the beginning of the end of ttc for me because they have heard incredible success stories or they know I’m blowing something out of proportion. Like maybe someone has gone through something similar and can normalize this for me? I know everyone here is going through a lot, so I feel stupid for posting, but I’m grasping at straws trying to deal. I have tried searching through here for helpful old threads, but maybe I need better search terms. Suggestions welcomed for a better search!

i had my hsg today and it looks like one tube is blocked and the other has a hole? And there’s something in my uterus too—maybe a polyp? The re isn’t entirely sure what he saw, but the tube seems to be the main issue of concern atm. After passing through one tube, the dye went up rather than follow the downward curve of a normal tube, so that isn’t good. The re sucks at bedside manner, but I haven’t wanted to find someone else because of losing time or dealing with insurance, and he’s fitting me in to follow ups quickly, so I’m sticking with someone who keeps making me cry by saying the wrong things. (“if only you had come to me sooner. This is bad. No wonder you weren’t getting pregnant, look at that. You’d never get pregnant like that.” And random sexist stuff including making me feel bad for “getting emotional” so that I couldn’t understand something.) mind you, no one referred me sooner even though I kept asking about it, telling them how I spotted for days before and after af. Apparently I’ve had an issue since when I was in the hospital last...over 2 years ago. Which seems like a really long time for an infection to wreak havoc.

on the bright side, he’s fitting me in for a hysteroscopy tomorrow and surgery on Tuesday. I’m terrified. I’m glad things are happening fast, but it’s a lot to take in, and I guess I hadn’t really expected something so severe.

Sorry to post so much, I just don’t know what to do with myself right now. Please forgive me my self pity while it’s all so raw right now.

kbrown2385 · May 2019

@begging4abump first and foremost don’t ever feel bad for posting here! We all have our shitty days where we just need to be miserable and get it off your chest. No shame here! I’m sorry that you haven’t gotten good news but glad they are taking care of it quickly. I don’t have any info that can help, but just want you to know I’m thinking of you! Lots of hugs your way!

keikilove · May 2019

@begging4abump I’m so sorry for this shocking news you’ve received. Please do not apologize to us for being upset. It is a lot to take in and there do seem to be a few question marks, we can definitely understand your agony. As far as your RE’s treatment of you, I’m sure we will all say you’ve got to find someone new to work with. Even if you continue with him while waiting on a future appointment with someone else, you just shouldnt stay with someone who treats you that way. My new RE believes very strongly in the mind-body connection: she believes that positivity begets positivity/positive results, etc—and you can only imagine what she would say about how your RE’s treatment is going to impact you consciously and unconsciously. Please don’t subject yourself to that too much longer while trying to bring a little one into the world. Praying for you, FX that surgery goes smoothly.

celticknotfire · May 2019

@begging4abump I am so sorry you didn't get positive news from your RE. Don't feel bad for posting here or for feeling bad or any of that. We have all had bad days and that's what we are here for! Personally I would find a new RE because this process is hard enough without having someone make you feel like that. I would not say that you journey is over as this has happened to women before so wait until you have all the information and another opinion. Feeling overwhelmed is something we have all experienced and it's better to get it all out than to hold it in. GL tomorrow and with your surgery. Good thoughts headed your way

emmasemm · May 2019

@begging4abump first of all sorry you got this news but good you get in so fast to have it sorted.
Like the others said, we all have our down days sometimes and it’s no pain olympics here.

But - either tell the RE you’re not comfortable with what he says next time he acts like that, or in parallel search out a second opinion. If you’re already in treatment and clearly state you’re searching a second opinion some clinics will fit you in much sooner.

Regarding the findings - polyps are extremely common and if he removes them during your Hysteroscopy you’re good to go. I had one just last month. It’s not fun but definitely not the worst thing for pain or recovery.
I’m not sure why he’s not doing it together with the surgery though... if your insurance is paying I guess it’s ok.

Regarding the surgery - I assume he is planning a lap and is thinking it is adhesions from your surgery 2 years ago. I recommend to make VERY clear before the surgery in which cases he can proceed and which cases not.
In case it is not normal adhesions but endo, I throughly recommend he stops and you go to an endo specialist. If it’s just freeing normal adhesions fine. If he wants approval to move your tubes then be clear you’re ok with that up front - though also remember this is what IVF is perfect for treating very easily. I recommend you don’t give approval for him to do anything to your ovaries. These little dears are very sensitive and if he sees problems which need addressing there you might want to do an egg retrieval first before having that sorted (and even then only if it’s essential). Also I recommend they don’t do anything else with your uterus other than polyp removal without your express consent. The uterus is another very temperamental beast and does not like having bits cut out, even from the walls - only the polyp should be touched. If they see a fibroid in the wall but also affecting the lining (submucosal) then really make sure you see a fibroid specialist who is used to preserving fertility for it.

And if you don’t feel like the best negotiator in this situation, take someone who is. Know your “must haves” and stick to them. Try to discuss with the doctor so you get his opinion, but don’t let him bully you. They are not gods.

My endocrinologist (for my thyroid) first time I went asked me where was my husband as he didn’t think young women should see doctors on their own as they can be too emotional. I put him clearly and politely in his place that first time and now we have a great relationship.

Good luck with the Hysteroscopy!

begging4abump · May 2019

Thank you @kbrown2385 @keikilove @celticknotfire @emmasemm you’ve given me some real support and some real stuff to think about. ❤️ I know I’ve been more of a lurker than a poster in the last month or so, and I’m totally new to the IF thread, so I really appreciate your willingness to reach out to this internet stranger. With regards to my re, I think I’m hoping the bedside manner is a cultural divide. But I think I’ll be clearer about what exactly is crossing the line for me. He did ask if he could give me a hug yesterday, which I declined, so I think his heart is in the right place maybe, but has some old fashioned beliefs or unawareness as to social cues. Hopefully with the information from today’s visit (images and answers to our list of questions) and the time over the weekend, I’ll be making a plan that I’ll be able to live with. I guess what’s adding to my worries is that I’m limited in my options for how to proceed since mh isn’t interested in pursuing iui or ivf for religious reasons. So that just feels like I may have gone from expecting to get pregnant to learning that that is an impossibility for me. I guess I was just in denial before I started this testing. I was expecting to be told we just needed to fix hormone levels or curb our stress I guess. And, geez, I’m not excited about butting heads on yet another religious point with dh. On a related note, Dh is falling apart a bit, so it’s really comforting to have you all in my corner too. I’ll probably be filling in my mom tomorrow about all this ttc business tomorrow since she’s coming over to help out with things while I’m at my appointment. I’m not too excited to stress her out. I told her I had an appointment, and I’m pretty sure she’s expecting me to share opposite news from what reality is. Not looking forward to her look of worry/sadness when she realizes this may be a closed door for me.

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