Leftover embryos

Jacqi215 · March 2019

Hello, after a successful ivf and the birth of my baby boy, every month I pay for my 12 frozen embryos. We are getting ready to do ivf round 2 and the thought occurred to be that I will have to part with a lot of those embryos (we only want 2 children). The thought of parting with them has got me very emotional and wanted to know how every one else feels and how was it for some of you?
Thank you!

ACAC25 · March 2019

Unfortunately my DH and I are not in the same situation as you. We just had 1 failed IVF with no frozen embryos and are currently preparing for round 2.
However, DH and I had some serious discussions when we had to decide what to do if there were leftover frozen embryos. I do admit that it made me feel really strange. I felt kind of weird about discarding the embryos but also felt strange about donating them thinking we could have kids running around that arent with us. Ultimately we decided to donate the embryos to help other couples who are experiencing infertility have a family.
It is a very hard and personal thing to decide. Not easy at all.

kloe818 · March 2019

Jacqi215 said:

Hello, after a successful ivf and the birth of my baby boy, every month I pay for my 12 frozen embryos. We are getting ready to do ivf round 2 and the thought occurred to be that I will have to part with a lot of those embryos (we only want 2 children). The thought of parting with them has got me very emotional and wanted to know how every one else feels and how was it for some of you?
Thank you!

Have you considered donating to another couple when you're successfully pregnant? I've been reading up on that myself as a possible solution for getting pregnant. New to the IVF crew and researching all my options.

wifeinraleigh28 · March 2019

It is a very personal decision for everyone and there is no right or wrong way to do it. My DH and I have had some conversations about it and we don't really agree on what to do, even though we can both see the other's point of view. We have 6 remaining and only want 1 more kid. We definitely won't go through them all since we can't even afford to transfer them all. We can likely afford 2 more transfers and that's it. I want to donate them to another couple but my DH doesn't feel comfortable with it. So it's kind of up in the air.

Jacqi215 · March 2019

Yes we decided long ago we will be donating them to research, that decision was an easy one, my problem is with actually parting with them altogether!

caitiemae · March 2019

We're not to this stage yet, but I'm thinking I will donate if we happen to have extras. Has anyone gone through the donation process- where did you donate them? I've heard of the National Embryo Donation Center, but have any of you been able just to donate to your clinic? And are they strict with their requirements? I'm nervous they would deny them because of the genetics (my husband has cystic fibrosis and our embryos would be CF gene carriers, although they won't have the disease as I am not a carrier).

Jacqi215 · March 2019

kloe818 said:

Jacqi215 said:

Hello, after a successful ivf and the birth of my baby boy, every month I pay for my 12 frozen embryos. We are getting ready to do ivf round 2 and the thought occurred to be that I will have to part with a lot of those embryos (we only want 2 children). The thought of parting with them has got me very emotional and wanted to know how every one else feels and how was it for some of you?
Thank you!

Have you considered donating to another couple when you're successfully pregnant? I've been reading up on that myself as a possible solution for getting pregnant. New to the IVF crew and researching all my options.

yes we decided long ago we will be donating them to research, that decision was an easy one, my problem is with actually parting with them altogether!

jazziep · April 2019

That sounds like it would be very difficult. Congratulations on your first child and best wishes for success with your second.

I worried about this during our first fresh transfer. However, after failure during that procedure and a subsequent failed FET, we went through an second round of IVF and have 4 embryos. I mourned what truly felt like a loss of our embryos when they did not implant so I understand where you are coming from.

I am at a point now where I do not worry about that as much as I have come to terms with the options we have if we were so blessed to have a successful pregnancy and embryos we wouldn't be using.

Our clinic offers 3 options
1. Destroyed as medical waste (sounds horribly clinical to me)
2. Donated to research
3. Donated to a couple in need

I would pick option 3 if we ever are fortunate to find ourselves having to choose.

doubleblessings1124 · April 2019

We have 1 year old twins and 6 remaining embryos. We are preparing for a FET next month. We are hoping for 2-3 more kids but if we have leftover we are definitely donating to other couples. My doctor said the waiting list alone can be a couple years. Having gone through the hell of infertility I would love to help bring someone else their miracle. My husband and I don't quite agree on open vs closed embryo adoption. But we haven't discussed much about it.

[Deleted User] · April 2019

Yes, and not a day goes by we don't think about our remaining embryos. We have five remaining and are planning to eventually transfer them all, come heck or high water. They are our babies!!! We were also hoping for a "bigger" family, hopefully more than two, so God-willing at least a few of our remaining stick and stay. ❤

chasinghappydays · April 2019

We decided this before we even began. We were first talking about embryo adoption because the cost and less risk, but decided to move forward with IVF.

We believe that each embryo is a baby and a life. Donating them to research or trashing them is killing them and just as bad as abortion. It is a waste of a beautiful life. We are 100% decided on donating to another couple. We do have many decisions to make when and if the time comes, but I believe we will transfer all our embryos.

If you are looking where to donate I would look at snowflake adoptions, national embryo adoption, or create a profile on national registry for adoption.

From our research we found that clinics separate your embryos between multiple couples, and the donation centers give all your embryos to one couple so that the embryos can have siblings.

Of course this is our opinion and beliefs.

chasinghappydays · April 2019

@Jacqi215 check out Ayla and Caleb on you tube. They adopted embryos and have just had their first child after 5 years of infertility and a lot of losses.

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