People think we become mothers when we give birth but the truth is we become mothers the moment we start calling our babies to us in our thoughts, dreams and prayers. Some paths are short and some are so long that you can easily forget where you were headed.
Re: Inappropriate Comments/Questions Thread v2.0
Eta bu seriously I'm sorry your boss is being such a jerk. Congrats on the new job!
BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
Re-started TTC Aug 2016
Started IF testing Nov 2016
Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019
After beginning to share the news about having a second girl, I received my first "Well, two girls is still a blessing" comment like it was somehow disappointing that we aren't having a boy. I'm sure this is just the beginning of many comments about how we don't have one of each and "trying for a boy" in the future.
Also I refuse to tell my in-laws because my FIL thinks he's funny and has made multiple comments of, "You're not allowed to breed," to us and seriously motherfucker it's none of your business what I do. GTFO.
I am so ragey today I swear. I hate everyone.
... I'm so glad my life choices are up to you.
Posted in the randoms yesterday, but my MIL asked via text if I am pregnant. She hasn't seen me lately so it's just a rude, intrusive guess.
It drives me crazy when people say they are trying for a specific gender...that is not how this works, that is not how any of this works.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
We haven't announced yet so I've avoided comments like that so far. They annoy me though, why do people make assumptions so quickly?!
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17
I’m having a second boy and already got some comments about it not being a girl. Brothers sound pretty awesome to me.
@olivemomma I feel the same way about the special bond between same sex siblings and am bummed that one of mine won't have that bond. DD will be almost 7 years older than this baby and they will never be in the same school, so even if this one is a girl I feel like the sisterly connection is not the same as two close in age. But I would love to do pink, bows, dance classes and all things girly again! On the other hand, DS will only be 3 years older than this one and I would love to see him bond with a brother. Also, so far DS has been wayyyy easier than DD. There are great things about another boy or another girl so it is a win either way if this baby sticks.
DH and I both are not close with our siblings so I just hope for better for my kids. His only sibling is a half sister who is almost 10 years older. My situation is complex but the only sibling I was raised with is a brother who is 5 years older. We only talk to our siblings a couple times a year and that is mainly obligated family functions.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
@Allycat11 my sister is 9 years older than me. Growing up we did not get along at all, and she left for college when I was just 9, so I didn't see that much of her. But once I went to college myself we connected and each realized the other was pretty cool. Now we're very close, and even though we live several states away, we talk on the phone several times a week.
Now that we are expecting a boy, I'm expecting all the comments about "saving the family name" when I could not care less about a family name.
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17
We experienced the loss as a family, but I didn’t feel like I had to hide in my own home (we hadn’t told anyone but close family).
Do I regret telling them so early? Sometimes. Was I nervous to tell them this time? You bet. But long story short we did what we thought was right for our family and hopefully we are all a little stronger because of it.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
Second favorite was the the dental hygienist telling me exactly how my body was going to bounce back after the baby. Specifically how I would easily get back to my ‘original weight’ because of my age but that I shouldn’t expect for the weight to be proportioned the same. I should have thanked her for the insight into her crystal ball...
My 7 Year Journey ***Tw in spoiler***
IVF #1 - September 2018; Follistim, Menopur, Cetrotide & Lupron/HCG combo trigger; PGS; ICSI
Back on Levothyroxine
FET #1 - October 2018; cancelled, all PGS aneuploid
FET #1 - November 30th, transferred anyway
Wondfo BFP 5dp5dt, CB Digi 6dpt,
1st Beta on 7dpt 93
2nd Beta on 10dpt 510!
TTC #1 since 2011. Tried for 5 years before we knew there was a one year rule.
Diag w/MS 2016; w/PCOS & IF 2017
New RE 2018; PCOS diagnosis taken away, IF due to ovary adhesions, but prev. RE insists PCOS IF
IUI
IUI #1 July 2017 w/100mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #2 October 2017 w/50mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #3 February 2018 w/5mg Femara+trigger; low P
BFP February; mc March; Subclinical hypothyroid started Levothyroxine
IUI #4 March 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Medicated cycle & TI April 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Tried several cycles on our own; all BFN
Around 15 weeks I announced to my grandmother and a friend of mine also blabbed to every single one of our common friends. *TW My grandmother and one of my friends asked me basically how likely I am to have a miscarriage at this point, but said it like, “And you’re far enough along things are pretty safe?” It was definitely a question, a fairly painful one. I know a lot of folks who have announced to a much broader spectrum of people much earlier. Is this because I have a history of recurrent loss or is this something other people get asked into the second tri?
@zamora_spin WHOA. No, not common. And painful. I'm sorry.
Every old woman at our church (which is a lot, in small town Oklahoma): "When is your last day at your job? You can't keep working after the baby is here, he won't know who his mother is if someone else watches him."
ETA, forgot this gem from another elderly person at church yesterday, after they found out I'll be returning to work: "It's inappropriate for a mother to work outside of the home. It's your duty to raise your family, you know."
I went to prenatal yoga on wednesday, the receptionist asked when I was going to leave my job.... Ummm I'm not, I'm the breadwinner.... Are you going to be getting a nanny... nope, still using daycare... Please stop judging me on my choices.
@oklahomak WTF, this is not 1940...
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17