March 2019 Moms
Lbloom
member
Bedrest/hospital stay/nicu thread
Lbloom
member
I very much hate to be the one to start this thread but on Tuesday, after my repeat fetal echo, I have been admitted to the hospital indefinitely/until delivery. My fluid levels have gone up substantially (AFI in the 50s, normal range is less than 25). The high fluid, which is still unexplained, coupled with I had told my MFM to check me because of all my irregular contractions and back labor over Thanksgiving. Well, lo and behold I'm dilated to 3cm and 80% effaced. She could feel baby moving through my thin cervix. I know I've lost bits of mucus plug last week.
Some of you may know from my updates in PGAL/week 1 that I had put myself on limited mobility at home after the holiday. I was basically limiting myself to my house and the couch, only leaving to pick up DD1 from school. However, if/when my water breaks, the pressure release could be forceful enough to release my placenta, and baby is head down now, but with my "Olympic sized baby swimming pool" baby could present anything first if Niagara Falls starts flowing. The scariest incident is the cord prolapsing. If that happens, you have mere minutes to save the baby. (With my loss history, this is all too close to home). Minutes make a difference. My blood work and BP have showed a few symptoms of pre-eclampsia. I also have a touch of hypothyroidism.
Also, my local hospital that I was hoping to deliver at that was only 10 minutes from my house does not have a Nicu. I'm here at the bigger hospital 30 min away from home that has one. Tomorrow I'll be 29 weeks (I know I'm further along than most of you, but by the time my EDD was moved to Feb. 22, I was already comfortably familiar with all of you on this board and didn't want to move.) Hope it's okay if I stick around with you. We are hoping to make it as far along as I can. They didn't want me walking around at home with thus much fluid, being that much dilated. So I'm here for the long haul.
Poor DH is scrambling with the family we have in town to babysit DD2, picking up DD1 and also coming to see me some. I'm probably going to be here through the holidays. Every week baby stays in the womb is obviously ideal unless the pre-eclampsia goes crazy. I have twice daily NSTs, and lots of BP checks. I think that's it. I guess this is my new home. Feel free to chat with me, give me your stories if you went through anything similar in a previous pregnancy. I hope I'm the only one that needs to be on this thread. Sitting here with not a lot to do and watching the snowfall outside missing my babies at home terribly.
Some of you may know from my updates in PGAL/week 1 that I had put myself on limited mobility at home after the holiday. I was basically limiting myself to my house and the couch, only leaving to pick up DD1 from school. However, if/when my water breaks, the pressure release could be forceful enough to release my placenta, and baby is head down now, but with my "Olympic sized baby swimming pool" baby could present anything first if Niagara Falls starts flowing. The scariest incident is the cord prolapsing. If that happens, you have mere minutes to save the baby. (With my loss history, this is all too close to home). Minutes make a difference. My blood work and BP have showed a few symptoms of pre-eclampsia. I also have a touch of hypothyroidism.
Also, my local hospital that I was hoping to deliver at that was only 10 minutes from my house does not have a Nicu. I'm here at the bigger hospital 30 min away from home that has one. Tomorrow I'll be 29 weeks (I know I'm further along than most of you, but by the time my EDD was moved to Feb. 22, I was already comfortably familiar with all of you on this board and didn't want to move.) Hope it's okay if I stick around with you. We are hoping to make it as far along as I can. They didn't want me walking around at home with thus much fluid, being that much dilated. So I'm here for the long haul.
Poor DH is scrambling with the family we have in town to babysit DD2, picking up DD1 and also coming to see me some. I'm probably going to be here through the holidays. Every week baby stays in the womb is obviously ideal unless the pre-eclampsia goes crazy. I have twice daily NSTs, and lots of BP checks. I think that's it. I guess this is my new home. Feel free to chat with me, give me your stories if you went through anything similar in a previous pregnancy. I hope I'm the only one that needs to be on this thread. Sitting here with not a lot to do and watching the snowfall outside missing my babies at home terribly.
Re: Bedrest/hospital stay/nicu thread
I don't have any similar experiences or anything, but I just listened to a podcast episode for premie awareness month about a lady who had her daughter at week 27 or 28, I think. It was a scary story but they are both healthy now. If you are interested, the podcast is Babes and Babies and it is episode 43.
cheering for you both.
[spoiler=TW in signature]
Me: 36, DH 37.
August 2014- 6w MMC
July 2015- CP
PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.
Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!
[/spoiler]
She had her twin girls at 28 weeks at less than two pounds each when she was taking a mini-vacation about 2.5 hours away from home. They first went to the closest hospital that didn't have a NICU, she had an emergency c-section, and then they had to be transported to another hospital with a NICU. The girls spent about two months there and my sister stayed in a Ronald McDonald house nearby and family took turns staying with her as she recovered and the girls got big enough to leave.
Despite the bad stuff, the nurses and doctors at the NICU were amazing in terms of their knowledge and skills and ability to communicate with mothers and families dealing with insane stress and heightened emotions. We also found lots of ways to kill time and try to get our minds off the scary thoughts. I distinctly remember getting lots of old tv shows on DVD - I'm pretty sure we watched the whole Ally McBeal series while we were there... The girls are now perfect, healthy 9-year olds despite their rough start.
Like others have said, it's great that you're already in good hands and that you and the baby are being monitored so closely - that has to dramatically reduce the risk compared to other more "surprise" situations like my sister's. I hope you find some good ways to kill the time, you get lots of visitors (at least the ones you want!), and that the baby keeps cooking for a while longer!
@Lbloom hugs. I was admitted at 25+2 with DD when my water broke without warning and stayed through delivery at 26+1...and then an extra 102 days in the NICU. It was brutal, sorry, but some things made the hospital stay part bearable.
- Figure out milestones that have a meaningful impact on baby’s health and celebrate them. For me, 24 hours/getting a second steroid shot that would develop DD’s lungs, 48 hrs/max effectiveness for steroids/chances of immediate labor dropping by half, 26 weeks/survival rates jumping/disability rates dropping were huge, and I marked and celebrated every six hours I was closer to those goals.
- Get your laptop, phone, and appropriate extension cords pronto. So boring when you can’t even be productive. Work on projects like editing all those photos into an album that you’ve been putting off for months/years.
- Interrogate everyone on who the doctors/nurses/PAs/fellows/etc are and how they fit into the structure of your care before and after baby’s birth. Remember that you’ve just been thrown into a completely new care provider situation and it’s not your fault you know nothing about it. Talk to a neonatologist and get a tour of the NICU set up so you can familiarize yourself with that aspect too. An hour after birth is not really the time for them to teach you hand-washing protocol and where to stash your coffee. Ask about OT/PT/SLP/music therapy/volunteer cuddlers, when rounds are, visitation policies, whether there are primary nurses for babies (depends on the NICU census...larger NICUs are more likely to assign the same nurse most days), etc. Get familiar with lactation consultants, pump rentals, social workers (ask about parking and Ronald McDonald), chaplains, and any other support staff. Get your home religious org involved (potential babysitting/meal train, as well as spiritual support).
- Find a book on preemies (I recommend PREEMIES: the essential guide), which the NICU might have a copy of, and only read the first few chapters. Get slightly familiar with terms and likely procedures (eg transfusions) but don’t overwhelm yourself. Use as a reference for when things come up.
ETA (because my phone was dying from my pregnancy-related insomnia and I needed to hit post!):
- Sort out how to add the baby to your insurance and confirm retroactive coverage to birth, because NICU is $$$$$$$.
- talk to your partner about your personal visitation policies and info distribution plan. For me, I was happy to entertain guests while on bedrest. I was not happy to be entertaining lots of people I didn’t know well outside the NICU, and they sure weren’t coming into the NICU. The NICU itself didn’t really care who was there so long as it was not more than 2 people bedside including one parent, but we made ourselves a policy that the only people going in were DD’s grandparents, uncle, and godparents. Many of our aunts and uncles wanted updates, but I was not in a place to be sending them upon request, so I sent group texts to grandparents/uncle about detailed progress after rounds and the grandmothers covered distro to the wider family via email (my side) and text (DH’s side). This was not necessarily the most efficient way, but it worked for us.
- There are definitely other women on the antepartum ward if it’s a decent size hospital. If you can wander the halls at all, try to meet them, or see if March of Dimes is having a lunch or something. We are connected to several of those ladies still, because we went through that experience together.
Always happy to engage over PM too!
I have asked about other moms that are here for the long haul and there are some here, but they are mostly on the next floor (ante and post partum). I am on the labor and delivery floor so I can be close to the operating rooms. I can walk the halls on this floor but that's about it. Hope to find time in between monitoring.
A few things that helped me:
1. If you haven't already, request a neonatology consult and tour of the NICU. It was nothing like I expected. My hospital had shared rooms but wasn't a pod set up like I thought. It was really helpful hearing all the pertinent info from the dox. OBs and MFMs are great, but don't specialize in your baby once they're out.
2. I wont make recs.for activities for passing the time bc I dont have anything earthshattering to add. I did all the expected stuff. What did help me, though, was establishing a routine for my days. I was able to schedule my thrice daily NSTs for the same time every day, ate, showered, had visitors, etc and it helped me not feel like I was just laying there, even though I was! I was allowed one wheelchair ride a week and I would try to get outside even though it was winter. We wouldnloterally rodenaround the parking lot.
3. Get primary nurses if you can! Our maternity ward nurses weren't really used to caring for women who were still pregnant and some were better than others. My two primaries (1 day, 1 night) were absolute angels and made a huge difference. They did little things when they could to help me feel more comfortable
I'll stop myself because obviously I could write a book about this! Feel free to PM me if you would like. Be gentle with yourself. This process really challenges you mentally and physically. All my best thoughts to you and baby Bloom!
Our little nicu warrior is here! We went from Team green to Team Blue on Friday, Dec. 7th when I unexpectedly ruptured (while sitting there talking with guests no less) and there was blood in the fluid, meaning my placenta was peeling away. Everything moved really quickly then and they had him out via Emergency csection in a matter of minutes. At exactly 29 weeks gestation, he he was just shy of 4 lbs, and 17 in long. My little long-limbed guy is no bigger than DD's doll. He is breathing on his own, but he's had some problems with seizures and a possible brain bleed. Poor little thing has been through all sorts of testing but he is quite the little trooper. Right now I'm concentrating on pumping to bring my milk supply in, (nothing yet, but I keep at it every 2 hours) and healing from the surgery. My heart is hurting for my little baby, no longer kicking inside me, and it is missing home and my girls but we are taking things one day at and time. This is all taking a new kind of strength. It's going to be a rough 2 months. But we remain optimistic. I might not be able to respond much right now but I thank you all for letting me share this journey with you. I hope to update you all as I can but this is all still so new and so much to process. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers!
A few bonus items of advice now that you’re in the NICU:
- Download MyPreemie or a similar app to journal and take photos - I really enjoyed its reminders to celebrate successes/firsts and positive feelings like pride in my baby, as well as having the space to chronicle the setbacks/trade offs. It also syncs with a partner’s phone so your DH can journal about the girls at home while you journal about DS.
- Facebook has a “NICU PTSD Support Group (traumatic birth)” which you might find helpful. A lot of mothers join with infants still in the NICU, but a lot also post about their thriving children on/near their birthdays so you have something to look forward to.
- I remember initially thinking that I shouldn’t drink coffee because I was pumping breast milk, but then they started administering caffeine as a drug and I decided it wasn’t going to hurt DD. Take that comfort of an venti skinny peppermint mocha (or your drink of choice)!
- Donor milk is a wonderful and generous thing.
- (Have someone else) See if there are photographers locally that do newborn shoots in the NICU, if you were ever interested in newborn photos. No reason to not be as proud of DS and his start in the world as your DDs!
- Have someone charm the parking office/cafeteria into giving you the employee discount. My mom bought us a $100 card for the cafeteria which came with a 10% employee discount and it was awesome. Gift cards for gas, coffee, and misc expenses are also great gifts.
All the love for you guys 💙💙💙
I second everything @lyse01 said. I'll add that when I was pumping for my preemie hand expression was way more effective than pumping for the first day or two. I would get nothing w the pump but could at least get an mL or two by hand expressing onto a spoon and sucking it up w a syringe. Ask to see an LC!
I'll also mention that a lot of preemies have a little honeymoon period, esp when it comes to breathing, for the first 12-24 hours after birth. I mention it only because you shouldn't think hes getting worse if he needs a little help to breathe in the coming days. Hes just adjusting to life outside. Totally expected for a 29 weeker.
Enjoy your baby and update us when you feel like it! All my thoughts are with you!
of! Praying for you, your little guy, and your family!
[spoiler=TW in signature]
Me: 36, DH 37.
August 2014- 6w MMC
July 2015- CP
PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.
Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!
[/spoiler]
Married: 2016
BFP #1 4/23/18, blighted ovum 5/29/18
BFP#2 7/14/18, DS 4/5/19