TWW Thursday 10/25

cpiper39 · October 2018

**This is a thread that welcomes all regardless of where they are at in their TTC journeys. Please be mindful of topics that are discussed that could be hurtful to those going through tough times. Mention of children or pregnancies of others should have a TW and be in a spoiler if possible, and only be mentioned if it is extremely pertinent to the conversation. Thanks for keeping this a safe place for us all to engage!**

Month/Cycle:

CD/DPO:

Timing:

Typical LP length:

Testing:

R/R:

CS/Q:

cpiper39 · October 2018

Month/Cycle: 4/4

CD/DPO: 17/4

Timing: High

Typical LP length: 12-14

Testing: Next Sunday

R/R: Rant- We had dinner with my parents last night, and my dad was asking about grandkids in a somewhat joking/somewhat serious way. Like, when is it going to happen? It’s soooooo annoying. I think my mom understands that there are a lot of factors in play, and she knows that I have friends who have had trouble getting pregnant. I’m pretty sure my dad just doesn’t get it. She knows not to ask, but my dad thinks it’s good to poke apparently. They don’t know we’re trying. If we don’t get pregnant this cycle, I think we’ll talk with them about trying and just let us be because I don’t think I can handle another conversation like this, especially with the holidays coming. Blah...

CS/Q: No questions! I decided this cycle to chart BBT to confirm O only, mostly to preserve sanity. Last month, I got bent out of shape when FF said I had a Tri Chart. So this will be be last Chart this cycle.

Sparty18 · October 2018

@cpiper39 I’m glad you’re putting the BBT away! Sorry about your dad’s comments, it is so hard dealing with those.

Month/Cycle: 12/13

CD/DPO: 24/12ish

Timing: -5,-4,-3,-2, IUI on -1, IUI on O

Typical LP length: 14ish

Testing: Nostopaskingmealready

R/R: Rave: Supposed to be having dinner with friends tonight... I think it’s still on? Lol. We are terrible at confirming things.

CS/Q: Nope.

nolemomma14 · October 2018

@cpiper39 I’m so sorry that your dad has to poke at TTC like that. I’m sure he thinks he is just being funny, but it’s so annoying! It still amazes me that people think it’s ok to ask or comment on someone else’s personal life in regards to TTC. I’m glad your mom is supportive though, and didn’t say anything!

@Sparty18 I hope dinner is delicious tonight, if it’s still on haha!

chichiphin · October 2018

@cpiper39 Ugh I'm sorry about your dads comments. If you think talking to them will stop the questions and they won't be constantly asking if you've gotten preg, then I say talk to them.
@Sparty18 keeping us on edge... hope you figure out your plans tonight!

Month/Cycle: 6

CD/DPO: 22/3

Timing: Great

Typical LP length: 9

Testing: not yet

R/R: I'm so ready for MH's SA and my blood work this Sunday/Monday! I guess that's a rave?

CS/Q: WHERE TF are my CHs??

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/kv/pdjymuah2vf0.png

lulu1180 · October 2018

@cpiper39 I agree that if you think it will help the comments stop to talk to them. I was very vocal about the fact that we were going to start trying immediately after the wedding and both of my parents would (only half jokingly) ask if I was pregnant yet every time they saw me. My sister talked to them and explained that I was struggling and the comments stopped, at least around me. Fast forward 2 years and they don't say anything other than the occasional comment that they pray for me.

@chichiphin Have you tried the trick of putting in a fake high temp tomorrow to see if FF gives you CHs? I'm guessing it's just waiting to confirm because of the slow rise

cpiper39 · October 2018

@Sparty18 Thanks! Have fun today with your friends!

@nolemomma14 Thanks!

@chichiphin and @lulu1180 Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I’m going to wait until after this cycle and bring it up. We’ve been married 2 years now, and obviously just been trying since July. I thought it’d cause less stress not telling them, but I’m rethinking that. I don’t think he was trying to cause problems, but It’s still frustrating.

@chichiphin That’s weird you don’t have CH. I bet tomorrow you’ll get them because if you look at the overall month, there isn’t a huge difference in temps/slow rise like @lulu1180 said.

chichiphin · October 2018

@lulu1180 ha thanks friend. yes, it does.

marebear15 · October 2018

@cpiper39 - I'm so sorry you had to sit through a conversation like that. I really don't think people understand, especially ones who haven't gone through it. My mom recently asked me why it takes me so long to get pregnant. She had 7 kids in 13 years and her first was a one-shot wonder, honeymoon baby. I literally had to explain to her how it's only a 20% chance with perfect timing, I showed her the charts on my phone and how I temp and pee and check CM. She was just clueless. She had sex and she got pregnant. I'm very open about TTC to everyone though, so I expect the clueless questions.

@Sparty18 - Haha sounds like my family. Are we still doing fill-in-the-blank? No one has a clue.

@chichiphin - That's weird that FF hasn't given you CHs yet. Maybe tomorrow?

Month/Cycle: 6/6

CD/DPO: 20/3

Timing: -5, -3, -1, 0

Typical LP length: 12 is my longest

Testing: Sunday the 4th

R/R: On our last college student chaperoning outing, we had an "incident." One of our female students put herself in a compromising situation with one of our male chaps. He did the right thing and hightailed it out of there, but it brought up the subject among us chaperones about what happens if its gets to a "he said, she said" situation.
One of the chaps told a story about how when he was coaching, a high school girl came into the equipment room asking him if she could help and he had a moment of panic because they were in that room alone. He quickly told her that she could go to the field and wait for him and they could set up the stuff together. But it is just sad that good men, really good men, are scared that one accusation after an encounter like that, could mean their reputation and their career.
Anyways, didn't mean to get too political or anything, but I guess I just have a lot on my mind this morning.

CS/Q: I feel like I'm a fraud being here. Everything says that I O'ed, but temps don't lie. I just have this nagging feeling that my thermometer isn't working. Or is that just what I want to believe?
Edit: There's also got to be a reason why Amazon isn't sell my thermometer anymore, right? And it doesn't look like the company is making it anymore.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/z3/ejyar5y3ca9c.png

chichiphin · October 2018

@marebear15 I hesitated responding to your R/R, but because you posted in depth about it, I thought I would give you my take on it. Please know that I write this with a sincere empathy with how you interpreted the situation, and I just wanted to share how I interpreted it.

I think it is normal for you to be thinking critically about how men and women interact in these situations. We are in a newer era.

However, I do take pause with they way you have phrased the incident. From my perspective, it comes off as if anything were to happen, it would be the fault of both of the woman (in each anecdote) just because the woman is in the presence of a man. If the man in question is professional and restrained during the entire interaction (lets say he didn't leave immediately like both men did in your stories), it is highly unlikely there will be an accusation of inappropriate behavior. False accusations are very very rare in real life.

Side note - I do think it is fantastic that men are hyper-aware of how they interact with women in public and in private. I've been hyper-aware of men since about 13 or 14 (by hyper-aware, I mean walking with my keys between my knuckles in a parking lot too many times).

**edit** I think you O'd based off of OPKs and your thermometer has died... I really like my tamagotchi thermometer I got here:

https://www.amazon.com/Thermometer-Ovulation-Tracking-Backlight-Digital/dp/B07F6F1SZM/ref=sr_1_18_s_it?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1540476855&sr=1-18&keywords=bbt+thermometer+for+ovulation

elle-0409 · October 2018

@cpiper39 I'm sorry about your dad's comments. I think having an open, honest conversation will help resolve the issue. Good luck!

@sparty18 I feel like I have to corral my friends to get together, too. Hopefully it works out!

@chichiphin GL with your blood work! Isn't it funny how getting tested is a rave now?

@marebear15 Sorry for your wonky thermometer. Maybe you can get a new one if you need it for the next cycle? And I'm sorry that your male coworkers feel like they have to be vigilant, but it's such a small thing to do on their part. As women, we have to think about everything. Should we jog alone if it's too early/late, we need to always watch who pours our drink and keep that drink in our possession at all times, make sure we have money for an Uber in case a situation turns dangerous, etc. I know it's frustrating, but it's good that everyone is more aware now in the scheme of things.

Month/Cycle: 4/4

CD/DPO: 22/2 (But FF thinks 4)

Timing: Fine.

Typical LP length: 8ish

Testing: WFAF

R/R: I saw my doctor today and she confirmed my suspicion that I have a luteal phase defect so I am now on progesterone (yay!). If by the first of the year I'm still not KU we will move on to Clomid.

CS/Q: I showed this chart to my doctor (because I'm Type A I had a printout of my last 4 cycles) and she thinks I O'd on Tuesday. I'll put back in my discarded temp from Saturday and see what it does in the morning.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/ok/8ofybyefblds.png

nightdreamr13 · October 2018

@cpiper39 – I understand right where you’re coming from. I just want to yell “WE”RE TRYING DANGIT!!!” Plus my sister in law is getting testing done to see what their options are so we all know they’re having difficulties. We’ve been married twice as long as they have so of course they’re expecting us to have news any day now. I wish so badly we did have news to share. L I didn’t want to tell anyone we were trying either.

CD/DPO: 33/??

Timing: ??

Typical LP length: 14

Testing: BFN already

R/R: So I’m back, finally! I’m not sure how long though because I’m starting a new job Monday. For those of you who remember, I had a super wacky cycle (multiple + OPKs this month plus a new thermometer), making it difficult to know the timing of anything. However, my cycle went from 37 days, to 35, to 30 and as you can see I’m on day 33 today. I’m trying not to get excited though because I’ve gotten a couple BFN’s already. And I made the mistake of taking an OPK 2 days ago and got a blaring positive so then google got me all excited, followed by a HUGE let down by another BFN hcg test. Womp wompppppp. I did have mild cramping from like CD 29-31. That’s all I’ve got…

CS/Q: See chart in spoiler but…I got a new thermometer on CD 18 so keep that in mind…

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/ek/mv8cuezy7cvw.png

brookert615 · October 2018

*lurking from WTO*

Just throwing my two cents in because this response to people asking has actually worked magically for us. DH will respond to people saying "we're just practicing" and usually people laugh and stop pressuring.

queenie_b · October 2018

@cpiper39 I'm sorry about your dad's comments, it seems like our culture makes nagging about grandkids seem like a normal thing to do. FX there is no conversation needed and you get a BFP! @marebear15 I find it so strange how the first timers and oops moms seem to think they have great insight and tips they just have to share on conceiving.

@sparty18 I feel ya with coordinating things with friends! Most of mine seem to be afraid to actually pick up a phone to talk through plans and things always get lost in texts.

@chichiphin I think your chart looks great! FX for solid CHs tomorrow! Also, your thermometer looks super pretty, I wish I had a backlight on mine, I am always trying to use my phone's light to read the numbers when I am entering.

@marebear15 Ugh I'm sorry your thermometer is being confusing. But I am glad you are here! I understand the concerns men face with the media attention that accusations have drawn; I don't feel like the comments were meant as trying to place blame. It is a conversation worth having about being respectful towards each other in fact and in appearance. It's hard because most logical minded people can imagine a world where incidents and false accusations don't exist but since they are part of our culture I think it is important for both men and women to be aware of their circumstances and do their part to ensure others are comfortable and feel respected.

@elle-0409 Sounds like you have a good dr who is really invested in your journey. I am glad she is finding answers for you!

@nightdreamer13 Sorry about the BFN and the confusing cycle.

@brooker615 Haha! I love that response!

Month/Cycle: 4/4

CD/DPO: 22/9

Timing: Good

Typical LP length: 15

Testing: waiting to see how I feel and if my temps stay high

R/R: I have been getting a weekly veggie box from a local Amish group all spring/summer and today is my last one so a little sad about that, but looking forward to what's inside, I need more soup ingredients. Also, I would love any ideas anyone has for what to do with the turnips I got last week.

CS/Q: Same old same old. Interested to see what the rest of the month has in store for me

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/vn/js6l721r6hcs.png

b_1029 · October 2018

Also lurking, both of our moms know we’re trying. His mom always used to make comments about grandchildren so I finally hinted that it wasn’t due to lack of effort. And I just can’t keep secrets from my mom, especially when I’ve been so bummed out by it. If friends or acquaintances ask, we just say “hopefully soon” or something vague like that. I’m an over sharer so several close friends know the struggles but it’s nice to know there are people rooting for us I guess. @brookert615 I like your response better than my typically awkward “uhhhhh hopefully soon”

marebear15 · October 2018

@chichiphin - I definitely wasn't placing blame in either situation, but it was interesting to me to hear the guy's perspective on current events. I never thought that they would be as you said hyper-aware of women, just as we are when placed in circumstances like that. I guess it's just sad that we live in a world where both men and women feel like they have to be on their guard with each other.
Thanks for the thermometer link! I may try it next cycle if my temp keeps dropping lower and lower.

@elle-0409 - I'd agree with your dr. I'm wondering if FF will shift it to Tuesday with the other temp.

@nightdreamr13 - Is it possible that you are Oing really late?

@queenie_b - Ooh, I love Amish produce! I got a huge box of apples this fall and made apple butter, and just ran out of cider as well. Those are some nice and high temps!

Edit:
I wanted to edit my first reply because I’ve been thinking about it more. And I do think in the first situation, I would place blame on the girl for putting herself and our male chaperone in an awkward compromising situation. She broke the rules of the private property we were using. However, if something had happened, that blame would be entirely on our male chap. I do not blame the victim for something that was completely the choice of someone else. I don’t say, Well she shouldn’t have been there; she should have had clothes on, etc. But the male chap did the correct thing and left the situation. So I believe that each person should be responsible for their own choices: her for putting that guy in an uncomfortable situation, but had something happened and he had done anything to her, then the blame is entirely on him.
In the second scenario, I wouldn’t place blame on the poor high school girl who had no idea what she was doing. And if again something had happened, she was the victim and it would have been entirely the coach’s fault for anything that happened.
But I am not naïve enough to think that false accusations don’t happen. In the first incident, if that girl had gotten in trouble for breaking the rules and got mad at the guy that caught her, I do think that it’s entirely possible that she could have said something had happened to get back at him or to get herself off the hook.

nightdreamr13 · October 2018

@marebear15-I suppose anything is possible, but CD 33 seems extremely late when my longest cycle has been 37 days, which was my first tracked cycle after discontinuing BC. Is it even possible to get pregnant if you ovulate that late?

lulu1180 · October 2018

@nightdreamr13 It doesn't matter the length of your cycle, as long as you O, it is possible to get pregnant. Although, I have a couple questions for you...
How long have you been tracking your cycles (length of time and number of cycles)? How many of those cycles have you confirmed ovulation?

lilyan1522 · October 2018

@cpiper39 It drives me nuts when people ask about TTC. Even when its family. My BIL said to me once...you pregnant yet? HUUUUUUUge eye roll.

@sparty18 I saw a post on insta recently that was like...if we made plans but I haven't heard from you at all that day, our plans are off. Ha

@chichiphin Glad youre getting test results back. Always good to have all the info. Glad you got CH with the fake temp Tmrw!

@marebear ugh frustrating about your thermometer. I got mine at target for $7...seems to do the trick

@queenie_b Your chart is still looking great!

Month/cycles: 6

CD/DPO: 25/9

Timing: -3,-1

Typical LP length: 12-13

Testing: maaaaaaaaaybe Saturday (if temps stay up) since I'm having a few people over and will want to drink

R/R: Rant: TMI warning: Ate a beet salad for lunch yesterday that was delicious but gave me bad GI upset and nausea. Still nauseated this morning. Making me SS like crazy! Rave: Working for 24 hours today so will stay busy and keep my mind off of "am I KU?"

CS/Q: Can't help but be excited that my chart looks triphasic even though FF didn't say anything about it.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/g1/pit63nbvo08s.png

eranfaraway · October 2018

@cpiper39 I'm so sorry you father is being so oblivious. My dad and MIL do the same thing and I have found their comments make our journey that much harder. My parents tend to spread overshare with random acquaintances, so we chose to keep the fact that we're ttc private. Maybe I'll try what @brooker615 suggested next time! I hope if you decide to talk to them that they listen to you take take what you say to heart.

Month/Cycle: 12

CD/DPO: 25/10?

Timing: Good

Typical LP length: IDK

Testing: Trying to wait until the weekend when AF is due, but we'll see!

R/R: We had a lot of unpleasant surprises this month, I'm hoping we're done with those for a while! Also father winter needs to calm down. It's only October and it's already snowed twice!

CS/Q:Not sure what CS stands for, I guess that's my question?

queenie_b · October 2018

@lilyan1522 Your chart looks great too! As a fellow lover of beets I am sorry they didn't work with you yesterday. Also, I love that work that much to keep your mind busy is your rave! Funny how TTC can alter our perspective on situations.

@eranfaraway Sorry you are having a rough month! CS stands for "chart stalk" you can look at previous posters (PP) for how they responded. Some have questions about their chart, sometimes its just to share.

eranfaraway · October 2018

Thank you, @queenie_b. You are so sweet to say so and I really appreciate your explanation! If AF pays me a visit this weekend I think I will order a thermometer so I can start tracking BBT to learn more about my cycle.

cpiper39 · October 2018

Thanks, everyone for the love

We're pretty open in our family, so I made the decision to call my mom at lunch and explain the situation and how I was hurt by it. I figured why wait a couple weeks and instead wanted to clear the air. She actually guessed that was the reason I was calling. She gets it and will relay the info to my dad that we're trying and him asking about it isn't helping anything. I feel like a big weight has been lifted. I told her I was trying to cut down on the stress by not saying anything to them but that it seemed to backfire. Anyway, thanks for the feedback - I really needed it today.

nightdreamr13 · October 2018

@lulu1180 this is my 3rd cycle tracking seriously and taking opks. For those 3 cycles, I got 2 to 3 days (usually cd 18-21) of steady clear positive opks and clear negatives the rest of the cycle. This past cycle I got a positive on CD 9 and 12, both of which seemed early so I retested a few hours later and got negatives. Then again on CD 22 and 24. I just started tempting this cycle and realized my thermometer was not reliable so I bought a new one on CD 18.

TWW Thursday 10/25

Re: TWW Thursday 10/25

Choose Another Board

Search Boards