H doesn't like Mexican. We've been together 8 years and I only found out in the last year or so. I was devastated. Who did I marry? But he put up with nacho and taco and burrito dinners and my choice of Mexican restaurants without complaint so I guess it's ok.
Me: 31 H: 36 L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
@mermaidca After five and half years together I just found out last month that my husband doesn't like chicken wings...I am from Buffalo, NY originally- the birthplace of the chicken wing. I was more than a little irrationally upset to learn this about him.
Oh then there is one for me. I hate eating meat with bones included. I will sometimes eat ribs but just because the meat usually falls off the bone. So I don't like wings, or bone-in steak, or bone-in chicken thighs. Freaks me out.
My UO that I hate hearing about birth plans and “natural childbirth” and I think far too often women boast about their plans to one up each other. Childbirth goes how it goes, you may get what you want or you may not, but that’s mostly up to your body and your baby. Personally I had an unmedicated birth by accident because I didn’t get to the hospital in time, when I had no birth plan other than wanting an epidural, lol - I’ll tell you I’ll never do that again if I can help it!
@piccola1988 yeah it all turns into a competition and it drives me bonkers. Also though - I don't like the term "natural childbirth." Unmedicated childbirth? OK. Med-free childbirth? Alright. But no to "natural" for me. (Probably another UO)
I agree with both of you @piccola1988 and @mrdcle. MIL constantly talks about how I should try for a "natural" birth this time - and by that she strictly means vaginal. She hasn't mentioned her feelings regarding meds or not but for some reason she cares how the baby leaves my body. My last one was an emergency c-section to save Baby B, I didn't care how it happened. I think birth plans are nice and all but I don't put too much into it because I know how fast they can change.
Me: 31 H: 36 L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
@MRDCle I agree with you 100% on “natural childbirth,” hence the quotation marks! It’s an annoying and arbitrary term. Personally I feel however you get your baby out sounds pretty darn natural to me, you just grew it in your body FFS.
@MRDCle I agree the term “natural childbirth” is awful and leaves a lot of mothers feeling inadequate. @Piccola1988 my birth plans were to not have a plan. I just prepared for different outcomes and went with the flow of how labor was progressing.
I wish i could could remember my UO (stupid pregnancy/mom brain lol)
My UO: Routine cervical checks during labor are a scam and get my blood boiling (except for VBACs, where the uterus really can't take too much stress). It honestly doesn't matter if your sticking to the curve, labor can come in fits and spurts of dilation and there are lots of ways to progress besides dilation! (Softening, shortening, moving down, etc). It's just part of the hospital scam to unnecessarily augment women's labors to put them on the slippery slope towards cesarsan (or $$$$$$$). And remember OB is a SURGICAL speciality, they are first and foremost trained to cut.
Out of the 21 births between my friends and 3 SILs in the past 8 years (this is the group I'm most familiar with obviously) 2 have been CS. That woman then went on to have a successful VBA2C. I guess I just don't get the inherent distrust of all doctors and medical professionals.
Yes, @MRDCle 100% on the distrust of doctors. Like you, of the many, many people I know that have given birth in the last few years, I know of 2 that had a c-section. One was twins, and the other was AMA, so both were high risk and I imagine there were good reasons, although honestly the latter gave up and demanded a c-section when the doctor really wanted her to try pushing for longer. Oh, actually, I also have a third acquaintance that had a c-section and then a VBAC.
@molecularmolly if your doctor is pushing for a c-section for no reason, honestly you have a shitty doctor.
Maybe it's because my mom is a L&D nurse and has been for my whole life, but I never felt distrustful of medical professionals. Sure, there are some that are better than others, and I'm lucky to have somebody who knows the field to help me choose the right ones, but these days everything is online anyway so it's easy enough to research good doctors!
I am all for a dose of healthy skepticism but when moms start going Dr. Google and thinking they know better than people who dedicated their lives to the science of medicine, I get heated. Don't even get me started on the anti-vaxx movement.
UO: I don't look down on elective C-sections. How you birth is how you birth and no one should really have an opinion on it except you, your partner, and your medical team.
I definitely agree that there are good and bad doctors, although I am of the mindset that some big hospitals (especially in the states) have too much on their plate/are in such a hurry to birth babies that they don't give mothers a decent chance sometimes. My one friend ended up with a c-section after being in labor for only 14 hours with her first.
The doctor I had for my first was a condescending a**hole, so I'm going to a different hospital and using a doula this time with the hopes of having a calmer, more positive experience.
@sheknows6 I lose my mind thinking about anti-vaxxers. Not that there is any actual link between vaccines and autism, but the thought that parents who believe this would rather their child catch a life threatening illness than be autistic makes my head spin off.
@Piccola1988 And not only are they putting THEIR children at risk for life threatening diseases, but also already seriously ill children with weakened immune systems who *can't* get vaccinated, and tiny helpless babies who are too young to have all their shots yet. If it was truly a personal choice I might feel different, but it affects others in a big way! (Most of the vaccines we get are about 80-90% effective, and the rest of the protection comes from heard immunity which they are jacking up, leading to children if responsible vaccinating parents getting sick too!)
I don't mind SS/AW posts. Sure they're annoying if there are a lot (all things in moderation). But I think it shakes things up. And I could use a little light-hearted snark vent, once in a while.
I strongly, strongly dislike joint bank accounts. Luckily, so does DH. We have one and we don’t use it for anything. It’s been sitting with $25 for a year. I cannot count how many times we’ve been told that the way we handle our finances is “weird”, but we’re doing just fine and we are great at splitting bills/ etc 🤷🏻♀️
Baby Boomers on the internet are ruining society. They are too set in their ways and susceptible to outright false hoods. And those who aren't assholes have bad security and easy targets for hacked accounts to parrot bad takes.
@sdelg09 DH and I don't share bank accounts. I think it works fine, but he might argue otherwise occasionally , because he sometimes runs out of money at the end of the month. But then I just give him some (haha. I make more and tend to squirrel away reserves). I pay the mortgage and most utilities. He pays daycare and cellphone. It's all our money. It just lives in different accounts.
@sdelg09 whatever works for your family/relationship. My aunt and uncle have had seperate bank accounts for over 30 years. Personally it doesn’t work for us since I’m a SAHM, but I totally get it if you’re both working full time
For the ladies who dislike the term natural childbirth: I once read a book that said all childbirth is natural, whether it’s a c-section or an epidural or I unmedicated. Because giving birth and getting that baby out of your body is natural. I loved that so much. It helped me make peace with being induced and hooked up to a million machines, when I had envisioned some sort of crunchy birthing center type scenario. And for this birth, my mantra will be, all childbirth is natural childbirth.
I strongly, strongly dislike joint bank accounts. Luckily, so does DH. We have one and we don’t use it for anything. It’s been sitting with $25 for a year. I cannot count how many times we’ve been told that the way we handle our finances is “weird”, but we’re doing just fine and we are great at splitting bills/ etc 🤷🏻♀️
I was 100% there...until we had a kid. We each had our own bank account and savings account and then had a joint savings that we used to pay bills. After DD was born it got harder to juggle money into each account so we combined everything, its so much smoother now. We each have our own credit cards we pay off every month so thats 'my money' but most people hate it people the other person tracks their spending. but in our house we spend whatever we want and trust the other person needed/wanted it and thats good enough
Me: 32 DH: 31
TTC #2 since January 2018
Baby #1 DD Born 8/25/2016 BFP: 8/11/18 Due: 4/26/18
@molecularmolly definitely more of a FFFC but you said it. While you may disagree with cervical checks, someone who had to labor for 40 hours and then push for 4 hours AND THEN have a c-section because baby wasn't coming out, yes, they were imperative. I caught an infection because my water broke 24 hours before (on it's own, no intervention) and she didn't come on her own. So had they not been checking, then who knows what would've happened. FWIW, she was sunny side up and was never going to make it through my pelvic bone.
My UO: People who completely distrust the medical profession has not met a medical doctor that they like. Both of my doctors are fact based and have never fed me bullshit. You are entitled to your opinion but remember that there are many ways babies enter this world (vaginal, section, VBAC, forceps, etc, etc) and there is no ONE way that's better than the other to have a baby.
Americanized tacos are bomb. The authentic ones are obviously amazing, but I also love that ground beef with chopped tomatoes, lettuce, sour cream, and hard taco shells. Sometimes I don’t want to go to a legit taqueria, I’m down for the Taco Bell drive thru.
I’m also not down for that childbirth bragging shit. I’ll call you a twat to your face if you try telling me you’re better because I had an epidural and you didn’t.
Re: UO 10/4 Unpopular Opinions
No! See my disclaimer I can never think of a true UO that I hold (basic here), so I just grabbed a meme willy nilly.
BFP: 8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
H: 36
L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay
BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
ETA: So sorry @happymoni21
My UO that I hate hearing about birth plans and “natural childbirth” and I think far too often women boast about their plans to one up each other. Childbirth goes how it goes, you may get what you want or you may not, but that’s mostly up to your body and your baby. Personally I had an unmedicated birth by accident because I didn’t get to the hospital in time, when I had no birth plan other than wanting an epidural, lol - I’ll tell you I’ll never do that again if I can help it!
H: 36
L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay
BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
@Piccola1988 my birth plans were to not have a plan. I just prepared for different outcomes and went with the flow of how labor was progressing.
I wish i could could remember my UO (stupid pregnancy/mom brain lol)
H: 36
L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay
BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
My family is in Buffalo and DH was so excited to try both Anchor Bar and Duff wings when we visited. Omg. I want some wings now.
BFP: 8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
@molecularmolly if your doctor is pushing for a c-section for no reason, honestly you have a shitty doctor.
Maybe it's because my mom is a L&D nurse and has been for my whole life, but I never felt distrustful of medical professionals. Sure, there are some that are better than others, and I'm lucky to have somebody who knows the field to help me choose the right ones, but these days everything is online anyway so it's easy enough to research good doctors!
I am all for a dose of healthy skepticism but when moms start going Dr. Google and thinking they know better than people who dedicated their lives to the science of medicine, I get heated. Don't even get me started on the anti-vaxx movement.
UO: I don't look down on elective C-sections. How you birth is how you birth and no one should really have an opinion on it except you, your partner, and your medical team.
DD born: 3/31/19
The doctor I had for my first was a condescending a**hole, so I'm going to a different hospital and using a doula this time with the hopes of having a calmer, more positive experience.
H: 36
L & N twin girls: 3yo. Born at 30 weeks. 2 month NICU stay
BFP Aug 2018: EDD April 2019
BFP: 8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
Baby Boomers on the internet are ruining society. They are too set in their ways and susceptible to outright false hoods.
And those who aren't assholes have bad security and easy targets for hacked accounts to parrot bad takes.
BFP: 8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
prevously helloblueeyes
Me:32 DH:33 Married:04/2012 DD:07/2014
BFP 8/14/2018 #2 due 4/18/2019
Now, Hubs does like chicken finger subs which are another Buffalo staple so I did decide we could stay married
@thatbaintforbetty who are these men???? Not liking Italian food is unimaginable to me!
Also, team pro-birthing however you feel most comfortable bc fuck anyone who judges people for how they give birth.
BFP: 8/11/18 Due: 4/26/18
My UO: People who completely distrust the medical profession has not met a medical doctor that they like. Both of my doctors are fact based and have never fed me bullshit. You are entitled to your opinion but remember that there are many ways babies enter this world (vaginal, section, VBAC, forceps, etc, etc) and there is no ONE way that's better than the other to have a baby.