@expandcontract Oh yeah. I don't know if it's because that individual knows s/he is in the wrong, and gets defensive about it, or what. I also think "Back to School" time is awful with all of the Back to School pictures, which is also very dangerous.
@hutterflutter1019 I always cringe with the back to school photos. Those boards with the grade, school, teacher, class.. ahh why does that need to be posted?
@hutterflutter1019 I am with you on not posting pics of kids online. DH is extremely strict about no photos of DD online. She's the flower girl in a wedding next weekend and I'm super worried because the bride overshares her entire life on FB and insta.
@poshspice I was the same! DS was around 18m, and it was way past time. I finally got motivated to get the last 10 pounds off for my husband’s work “reward” trip for sales. Had it not been a cruise and knowing I’d have to be in a bathing suit, I may not have worried as much, but I did it, and for the first time since the summer of 2015, I put on that two piece and felt like myself again. It’s been a nice few months of having the weight off, and I’m not looking forward to getting it off again, but I am happy to be starting at the weight I want rather than with 10lbs extra to lose like I did last time. I’m already feel pudgy and have no energy to exercise, so I’m hoping the no energy at least passes soon.
@hutterflutter1019 I am with you on not posting pics of kids online. DH is extremely strict about no photos of DD online. She's the flower girl in a wedding next weekend and I'm super worried because the bride overshares her entire life on FB and insta.
I have a cousin who literally shares at least hundreds of pictures a week of her daughter on FB. I have to repeatedly remind her to NOT post pictures of my kids on her FB when we get together for holidays or birthdays. It's exhausting because sometimes she "forgets", but I think she goes with the philosophy: "It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission."
At my work, whenever someone has a baby, the mom sends pictures to EVERYBODY. And then people are forwarding those pics to random others who don't even know the mom. When DD was born i was like "hell no!" I sent ONE picture to my boss and i told her she can only show the picture to people on her phone. She may not send the picture to anyone. Luckily, she's very good about privacy.
@hutterflutter1019 could not agree more! We post very minimal pictures and only on insta- where followers are fewer than FB. What drives me crazy is having to police relatives. Like OK aunt sue -who just joined Facebook - doesn’t know how to work it -and has a public profile. Just. please. stop. posting. pics.
my UO is that I also don’t particularly enjoy being pregnant. I had hypertension, swelling and carpel tunnel with DD and just all around was miserable. I like having my body to myself. I totally view pregnancy as a means to an end. This also makes me feel terribly guilty. Maybe after the 1st tri funk I’ll feel differently...Hopefully.
TBH this was actually the reason I joined TB this time I around (I didn’t with DD June ‘16). I’m hoping to have support and be able to vent and laugh with other preggers and just embrace it all.
I do share pictures but I like to think I don’t go overboard. It’s definitely way more than 5/year though. I’ve actually been thinking about this lately - one of my friends has a public Instagram account and it really bothers me. It’s public for no reason at all, she’s not an influencer or anything. I literally only yesterday was thinking about that and then I was like wait - it’s public and ANYONE can see it! So I’m going to have to awkwardly ask not to post pictures of DS and frankly, not of me either, on her page. the BTS photos with all the info are kind of weird. A nice keepsake to have but not for all of the internet, like idc who your child’s teacher is, j live on the other side of the country.
All this talk about breastfeeding is reminding me how uncomfortable I was and how I didn’t feel like myself at ALL. I wouldn’t say I was in pain the whole time but it was definitely some level of constant discomfort. My boobs would be sore sometimes, my nipples would ache, I’d have a letdown at random times in random places which sometimes would be painful, and idk - I just felt “off”. It’d be really nice this time to be able to pump extra for freezing. H blew through my stash so fast last time and a lot would get wasted. I was so mad at him one day, I stared daggers into his eyes and told him if he wasted one more bag, I was going to milk HIM. I still have four bags in the freezer I’ve been waiting to do something with and omg I just realized DS is sick and I should give him the last of my stash tomorrow 🤦♀️
My UO (maybe?): One of my coworkers just had their first baby, and several people have organized a "meal train" to bring food to their home each night for the first week or so now that they're out of the hospital. To me, this sounds like a nightmare. Fresh out of the hospital, now have a revolving door of acquaintances come paw at my new baby in exchange for sketchy casserole and feelings of obligation to return the dish asap? This makes me want to lock myself inside and never leave.
I'm pro breastfeeding as well, but also hated it. It's convenient, but I just didn't feel that "bond" everyone says you'll have.
Ok, I'm bracing myself for flames for this UO, because I KNOW it's unpopular: I think people who post tons of pictures of their kids on Facebook/Instagram are putting themselves and their kids at risk.
I definitely think this is not as unpopular as you think. And I don't necessarily disagree with you. But I also share a ton of photos of my kids online. I used to write a blog pretty consistently before instagram killed blogging. There is definitely a risk that your pictures will be stolen and used in nefarious ways. But I think the biggest risk for kids comes when they start their own accounts.
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe DD2: October 2016 DC3: coming May 2019
My UO (maybe?): One of my coworkers just had their first baby, and several people have organized a "meal train" to bring food to their home each night for the first week or so now that they're out of the hospital. To me, this sounds like a nightmare. Fresh out of the hospital, now have a revolving door of acquaintances come paw at my new baby in exchange for sketchy casserole and feelings of obligation to return the dish asap? This makes me want to lock myself inside and never leave.
My friends have done this before and we’ve texted the new parents that a dinner is waiting for them on their front steps (ETA in a disposable pan). But agree, if it’s done the way you’re describing, absolute nightmare. I didn’t mind some visitors but I got upset if they stayed longer than 45 minutes or didn’t leave the next time DS needed to nurse. Figuring out breastfreding is hard enough without an audience.
@brie_and_almonds our church does a meal train and I never stay. I drop off the food and leave. We had people bring meals with our girls and it was great to not have to make dinner but we did have a few people come and stay but I think we invited them in. It’s been awhile though so my memory is a little fuzzy! Haha.
Ivy: July 2010 | Stella: Dec 2012 | BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020
There are so many more nefarious apps than FB and insta we’re going to have to worry about for our kids. Something called musical.ly is currently used by young kids and by predators and human traffickers. I read an article about it and there are huge loopholes around their privacy rules. I’m sure there will be even worse things out in 10 years from now.
@poshspice my daughter begged me to let her down load that app and I refused. She got a cell phone this year for her birthday bit we have parental controls set on it. Shes not able to download any apps without me approving it from my phone first.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@poshspice i agree. Its difficult because she just started middle school and all her friends are allowed to have all these apps and even have fb.
I dont even want her to have a phone at her age. But tthe school doesn't let the kids call home if they forget they have after school activities or tutoring. So we got her a phone so she can reach me when she needs me or an issue comes up. So far its been very helpful.
Like today she was supposed to have after school tutoring. But her teacher didn't tell everyone it was canceled until last minute. Her teacher wouldnt let her text me that. So she called me after school let out to come get her.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@poshspice I don't know if it's musical.ly or lyric.ly. I only know about it because an ad popped up for it when i was using something else. Anyhow, it had a short video of this really young girl (maybe 12) belly dancing on it. This girl was dressed up like an adult with a crop top and leggings dancing sexually. I was shocked top see that! It's just begging for pedophiles.
@DuchessOfCambridge That sounds much better. I don't know the new parents very well, but other coworkers have described them as "pretty private," while in the next breath bragging about spending an hour with the new baby when they delivered their meal. The way you describe sounds 100x better than what I was imagining.
@robyn2201 yeah, maybe it's not as bad as I'm imagining. Hopefully the family invited those who talked about snuggling the baby in to chat for a bit. I just remember in those first days I was lucky to get a shower, burst into tears every five seconds, and leaking milk all over... not exactly the state I want to greet my coworkers in.
Also, I'm weird about people coming over and the last thing I would want to worry about is cleaning.
I guess my unpopular opinion is that I don't use facebook anymore and love not having it. I was getting tired of all of the drama and felt like I wasn't really connected to people anymore. I de-activated my account and I am so much happier not having it.
My UO is that I think it’s kind of ridiculous to ban your child from having sugar or a happy meal every once in a while. My career involves educating the public on healthy choices but I think not having strict rules about food IS healthy. I think it’s important to teach that no food should be off limits. My son goes to a school where they have a chef cooking them organic, and what I consider to be healthy foods every day. But, some parents will complain if one of their snacks is organic cheddar bunnies or organic banana chips instead of a fresh fruit or veggie (one of their snack is always a fresh fruit or veggie but I’m talking about a 2nd). They want nothing processed and I’m sorry but I would be miserable if all I could snack on was blueberries and cucumbers all day. I want my child to have a healthy attitude toward food, and I think that involves enjoying some things that are indulgent without feeling guilty or like he needs to hide it.
@brie_and_almonds that sounds completely miserable, I too hope they were invited in.
Organic food makes me 🙄 I was gifted a baby food cookbook and I’ve never used it because the very first thing it stressed was how important it is to ONLY feed your baby organic. Thanks, but I don’t need a cookbook telling me I’m a sucky mother. I’ll buy organic if it’s cheaper, but not otherwise. I really don’t care about it and consider it a marketing ploy. I do care about supporting local farmers, organic or not. That being said, I do focus on healthier foods for DS right now while I can control it. He has the rest of his life to eat junk and I’m sure it’s only a matter of months before he starts having more opinions about what he will and won’t eat so I’m soaking it up while I can!
TL;DR I love McDonalds so the boy will eat a happy meal eventually, just trying to hold off on that one while he still doesn’t care. Those parents sound annoying @willmisspumpkinbeer
@DuchessOfCambridge how old is your son? Mine is a little over 2.5 and he has strong opinions now lol. I’m with you - I love chicken McNuggets. I get a 6 piece happy meal for myself I try to buy organic when it matters... like I’ll buy an organic potato because it’s grown in the soil and porous... but I won’t buy an organic banana since it has a thick peel we remove anyway. Our kids are eating grass-fed, pasture raised everything at school... get over yourself (other parents) for a cheddar bunny - I mean, come on!
@willmisspumpkinbeer he’s 10.5 months. He had mac and cheese for the first time yesterday and he couldn’t have cared less. He was having broccoli with it too and was equally enthusiastic about both 😂
Not even organic can save sweet potatoes from having too many heavy metals so there’s just no hope for any of us I guess 😂🤣😂🤣
@willmisspumpkinbeer he’s 10.5 months. He had mac and cheese for the first time yesterday and he couldn’t have cared less. He was having broccoli with it too and was equally enthusiastic about both 😂
Not even organic can save sweet potatoes from having too many heavy metals so there’s just no hope for any of us I guess 😂🤣😂🤣
Definitely ride that broccoli train for as long as you can!
@DuchessOfCambridge I 100% agree with you about organic food. Organic does not mean pesticide free and it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re using more sustainable farming techniques. It is 100% marketing. Same with non-GMO foods. We need GMOs.
I love FarmBabe for info on all this stuff.
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe DD2: October 2016 DC3: coming May 2019
@brie_and_almonds you're definitely not weird. I think the majority of us prefer to have a clean house when guests are over.
@lappymom2019 Im with you on the FB. I haven't deleted my account. However, i haven't posted anything in the longest time. I really only use it to creep on people like when we're interviewing a potential employee. All of my friends and most of my family are now on Instagram.
@willmisspumpkinbeer "Everything in moderation, " is my motto for life. Being that strict has only backfired on me. I completely agree with you. We try to buy organic whenever possible. The one thing that we are strict on is always buying organic milk even though it's way more expensive. There are just way too many hormones in milk for our comfort.
@expandcontract We do the same exact thing. Always organic milk and the dirty dozen when possible. I agree @willmisspumpkinbeer - Kids should know that sweets, candy, etc. exists. And it's something they eat occasionally, when the parent decides. I feel like making unhealthy foods super taboo/secretive just encourages unhealthy eating later on, when kids are around foods like that and parents aren't there to force them to eat one thing or another.
@lappymom2019 I’m so jealous of anyone that’s managed to deactivate Facebook. I had mine deactivated for a while but I have too many friends who insist on only communicating via Facebook so I had to reactivate. I refuse to actually post anything there though.
A word of warning: the Environmental Working Group has proven over and over again their research is not to be trusted. They don't tell the full story, and the "dirty dozen" is part of that. The list has been debunked over and over again. I honestly look at them as a fear mongering group. I'm all for doing what makes you most comfortable but also, don't take it at face value and look at the research behind the claim. Strawberries are number one on the dirty dozen list and a kid could eat over 1500 of these in one day and nothing would happen because the residue levels aren't even close to strong enough to harm them.
I swear I'm not trying to be preachy, I just hate how groups like the EWG "prey" on consumers. You do you, for sure, but I want it to be your decision, not the EWG's haha.
@DuchessOfCambridge 1000% agree with you on organic. I majored in food science and it’s crazy what goes on with marketing tactics to sell food (or dissuade from certain foods).
regarding breastfeeding: I had a hard time with breastfeeding but "powered through" thinking I was doing what I was supposed to, per my child's pediatrician who told me I should breastfeed until he was a year old. That along with a few of my mom friends who kinda pressured me into not quitting convinced me to go as long as I could. It wore me the f out & drained me physically, emotionally, and mentally to the point of developing late onset ppd/ppa... I had such guilt but eventually around 8 months stopped & we switched DS to formula. I will absolutely try to BF this LO, but I will not be listening to anyone else but my own self this time & will not put pressure on myself bc it totally wasn't worth it. I wish I stopped sooner with DS but who knows maybe this time my experience might be different & I might enjoy it knowing it's my last kid or whatever but still, I'll have no problem going straight to formula bc I know fed is best and fed+ mommy keeping her sanity is better than best.
@DuchessOfCambridge Agree about kids having the rest of their life to eat junk. I don’t “deprive” my child of sweets or treats. He went through a vanilla wafer phase, and he is obsessed with fig newtons currently, but I try to keep the majority of his foods somewhat healthy. I also only give him water and milk. Husband will give him watered down Gatorade sometimes, and of course he lovesss his “Gatey” and pitches a fit for it when he sees it in the fridge. I’m not trying to have those battles. Can’t miss something you’ve never had. 🤷🏼♀️
@vivereidescent Right there with you on that. That’s the one thing I wish I could go back and do differently with DS. Lesson learned.
Our goal is to eventually grow/raise nearly all our own food so we eat relatively healthy here and try to stay away from lots of processed foods and we rarely eat out. Of course occasionally isn't going to hurt. First tri all bets are off. Food is food and survival is key.
Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader. , 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@vivereidescent woa, your ped is not supposed to say that, really. She's clearly biased and is basically imposing BF on you. That not makes a good doctor.
@vivereidescent what @expandcontract said. Our ped was totally on board with bfing and supportive but DS struggled to gain weight. He was consistently in the 1-2%ile and fell off the chart altogether a few times. His ped immediately suggested supplementing. Turns out we didn’t need to so I kept going but he didn’t even bat an eye at the 6 mo appointment when I said I was weaning. That’s the kind of support you need. Help when you want to bf, help when it’s not working out for whatever reason. I’m sorry you didn’t get that first time around, there definitely is so much pressure from outside and also from ourselves. Someone at my baby shower asked me if I was going to bf and launched into a lecture on why it’s so awesome. Like wow, haven’t given birth yet, what if my boobs don’t do that? Shh.
Re: UO Thursday 9/27
I don't post back to school pics with all the info though. That's kind of scary.
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
When DD was born i was like "hell no!"
I sent ONE picture to my boss and i told her she can only show the picture to people on her phone. She may not send the picture to anyone. Luckily, she's very good about privacy.
my UO is that I also don’t particularly enjoy being pregnant. I had hypertension, swelling and carpel tunnel with DD and just all around was miserable. I like having my body to myself. I totally view pregnancy as a means to an end. This also makes me feel terribly guilty. Maybe after the 1st tri funk I’ll feel differently...Hopefully.
TBH this was actually the reason I joined TB this time I around (I didn’t with DD June ‘16). I’m hoping to have support and be able to vent and laugh with other preggers and just embrace it all.
All this talk about breastfeeding is reminding me how uncomfortable I was and how I didn’t feel like myself at ALL. I wouldn’t say I was in pain the whole time but it was definitely some level of constant discomfort. My boobs would be sore sometimes, my nipples would ache, I’d have a letdown at random
times in random places which sometimes would be painful, and idk - I just felt “off”. It’d be really nice this time to be able to pump extra for freezing. H blew through my stash so fast last time and a lot would get wasted. I was so mad at him one day, I stared daggers into his eyes and told him if he wasted one more bag, I was going to milk HIM. I still have four bags in the freezer I’ve been waiting to do something with and omg I just realized DS is sick and I should give him the last of my stash tomorrow 🤦♀️
WOWZA sorry for the rambling
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe
DD2: October 2016
DC3: coming May 2019
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe
DD2: October 2016
DC3: coming May 2019
I think there are actually plenty of articles about this app, but here is just one. https://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/everything-kids/policeman-dad-warns-using-the-musically-app-could-put-your/
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
I dont even want her to have a phone at her age. But tthe school doesn't let the kids call home if they forget they have after school activities or tutoring. So we got her a phone so she can reach me when she needs me or an issue comes up. So far its been very helpful.
Like today she was supposed to have after school tutoring. But her teacher didn't tell everyone it was canceled until last minute. Her teacher wouldnt let her text me that. So she called me after school let out to come get her.
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@robyn2201 yeah, maybe it's not as bad as I'm imagining. Hopefully the family invited those who talked about snuggling the baby in to chat for a bit. I just remember in those first days I was lucky to get a shower, burst into tears every five seconds, and leaking milk all over... not exactly the state I want to greet my coworkers in.
Also, I'm weird about people coming over and the last thing I would want to worry about is cleaning.
I want my child to have a healthy attitude toward food, and I think that involves enjoying some things that are indulgent without feeling guilty or like he needs to hide it.
Organic food makes me 🙄 I was gifted a baby food cookbook and I’ve never used it because the very first thing it stressed was how important it is to ONLY feed your baby organic. Thanks, but I don’t need a cookbook telling me I’m a sucky mother. I’ll buy organic if it’s cheaper, but not otherwise. I really don’t care about it and consider it a marketing ploy. I do care about supporting local farmers, organic or not. That being said, I do focus on healthier foods for DS right now while I can control it. He has the rest of his life to eat junk and I’m sure it’s only a matter of months before he starts having more opinions about what he will and won’t eat so I’m soaking it up while I can!
TL;DR I love McDonalds so the boy will eat a happy meal eventually, just trying to hold off on that one while he still doesn’t care. Those parents sound annoying @willmisspumpkinbeer
I’m with you - I love chicken McNuggets. I get a 6 piece happy meal for myself
I try to buy organic when it matters... like I’ll buy an organic potato because it’s grown in the soil and porous... but I won’t buy an organic banana since it has a thick peel we remove anyway.
Our kids are eating grass-fed, pasture raised everything at school... get over yourself (other parents) for a cheddar bunny - I mean, come on!
Not even organic can save sweet potatoes from having too many heavy metals so there’s just no hope for any of us I guess 😂🤣😂🤣
I love FarmBabe for info on all this stuff.
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe
DD2: October 2016
DC3: coming May 2019
@lappymom2019 Im with you on the FB. I haven't deleted my account. However, i haven't posted anything in the longest time. I really only use it to creep on people like when we're interviewing a potential employee. All of my friends and most of my family are now on Instagram.
@willmisspumpkinbeer "Everything in moderation, " is my motto for life. Being that strict has only backfired on me. I completely agree with you. We try to buy organic whenever possible. The one thing that we are strict on is always buying organic milk even though it's way more expensive. There are just way too many hormones in milk for our comfort.
If you're curious, here's an article: https://www.forbes.com/sites/workday/2018/08/30/global-finance-leader-study-unlock-the-power-of-advanced-analytics-by-combining-finance-and-non-finance-data/#5f4c2489561c
I swear I'm not trying to be preachy, I just hate how groups like the EWG "prey" on consumers. You do you, for sure, but I want it to be your decision, not the EWG's haha.
(eta: the non organic variety)
@vivereidescent Right there with you on that. That’s the one thing I wish I could go back and do differently with DS. Lesson learned.
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙