FFFC 8/3

ladystout08 · August 2018

ladystout08 · August 2018

I fully intend on letting DS watch a movie (and likely fall asleep during it) tonight b/c I'm just tired and need a break.

Jackiemxoxo · August 2018

I just spent $20 on a first day of school sign for DD1 who is starting Kindergarten. After going through all those years of her crying/being nervous for her first day of daycare and I think this time I will be the emotional one. Ugh, hormones.

saltedcaramel518 · August 2018

I only wash my hair twice a week. Dry shampoo for the win.

emmaaa · August 2018

saltedcaramel518 said:

I only wash my hair twice a week. Dry shampoo for the win.

I'm lucky if I wash mine once a week. I try to do every Saturday but more often than not, I stretch it out to about 10 days.

kianarain · August 2018

saltedcaramel518 said:

I only wash my hair twice a week. Dry shampoo for the win.

Yesss team twice a week right here too! Except baseball hats for the win haha.

I wanted to post this in UO because this has been a hot topic, but I think we skipped it this week. My mom volunteered as day care for the first couple years and I plan to take full advantage! It's her first grandbaby and she wants a mini nursery in her house, a car seat for her car, etc. She's young and retired so if she wants to, why not? Keeping my eyes out for micromanaging my parenting style, but other than that I see no harm - it takes a village, right?

ladystout08 · August 2018

DH recommended I hire a lawn care service while he's gone and I just rolled my eyes and mowed the lawn the other day. But I also fell 3x on our steep hill in the back, had a weird low blood sugar episode right after and it completely took me out the rest of the night. So at his insistence, I called and set one up. It feels silly and idk why.

emmaaa · August 2018

I don't think there is anything wrong with asking for or accepting help. I do think it's wrong to use family/friend assistance as a replacement for parenting. I think there are times that parents need help from their parents/friends and need to take advantage of that if it's available because not everyone gets it. However, when it seems like the grandparents are raising the kids more than the actual parents are, then that when it becomes an issue (in my mind). Like, if you are at your moms house everyday when you or she gets home from work just so you don't have to take care of your baby and change diapers and deal with witching hour, I totally judge in my head. If you are over there every weekend if your husband happens to be working (even though he was home all week to help) just so you don't have to deal with your baby all day, the again, I will judge in my head. Of course this has a lot to do with the fact that I see this as abusing the kindness and generosity of grandparents and I know someone (more than one actually) who are these types of parents so it's more personal I guess. And like I said, I judge in my head and don't ever verbalize it.

@kianarain I look at your situation as being very different. I feel like a lot of grandparents dream of being able to stay home with their grandchildren and help out their children. With how the economy and retirement system is, unfortunately it's not possible for all but I can see it being just as beneficial to her and it is to you. My MIL was able to work 4 (10) hour days for about a year and a half after DD was born and kept her one day a week. Sure this saved us a little money but she loved it so much. We provided diapers, wipes, extra clothes, some toys, sleeping surface, food if needed, etc. But MIL also bought a lot of things on her own to make a baby's room for the grandkids.

My one piece of advice is to make sure she knows any "rules" that you are absolutely certain on. If she's going to be a babysitter of sorts then (in my mind) she doesn't always get to be fun grandma. MIL was awesome about making DD behave and mind and keeping her on schedule. She also would give her little treats occasionally and do "fun" stuff like grandparents do. But even though it was only once a week for us, it was important to me that she keep DD consistent to how we did at the babysitter's.

mrsmang · August 2018

@ladystout08 part response/part my own FFFC: it’s totally not silly to me! I’m on team pay for things that aren’t fun as much as is reasonable for us. We’ve had house cleaners for years, even in smaller apartments. My husband said he was excited to mow lawns when we bought our house, but a year in he was over it and so we hired someone for mowing and basic lawn care.

I figure normally I would be cleaning the house and he would be mowing (yes, I know we tend to follow more traditional gender roles, but that’s just what we prefer to do) so now I feel like it’s even that we each pay for one major chore we dislike.

ladystout08 · August 2018

@mrsmang we hired house cleaners too b/c my husband decided instead of him being nagged into doing things, he'd rather pay someone. He and DS still do the standard picking up of their stuff and laundry and what not but it's been nice to have someone come in between and wipe stuff down and vacuum. I think I'm mostly annoyed b/c my last pregnancy was totally different and I had no problem doing things up until like 36 weeks when I got high BP and pre-e. Everything is so hard this time and it took us so long to get here that sometimes I think I'm just being overly cautious.

kns1988 · August 2018

I picked up DS from daycare today because of a bug bite

He had a bite on his leg this morning, and then daycare sent me a picture and it looked really big and angry. I told them to draw a circle around it and let me know if it got bigger. A few hours later, they said it got bigger. So I went and picked him up, and of course it was perfectly normal by the time I got him home. He must just have bad reactions sometimes.

kianarain · August 2018

@emmaaa so well said! My SO & I will be primary parental figures for our baby (I feel like this is a "duh" moment but, seeing some convo on the other thread, maybe not so much) - but also feel like it's the best situation for everyone for when I'm back at work. So between my mom having additional purpose (she's always been "mom" first, and struggled so much w/empty nest syndrome), my baby getting the best possible care anyone could ever hope for, and being a full two-income family and the perks/comforts that come with that for us, I just can't think of a better situation. I feel so fortunate!

That said, great reminder on the rules piece. If she's going to have a role as caretaker, she can't be spoiling grandma all the time. My mom's also highly opinionated already, so we're for sure going to have to rope in her enthusiasm lol.

Edited bc pregnancy brain typing is at an all-time low

ladystout08 · August 2018

I just signed up to go back to school and I have college algebra and it's giving me so much anxiety. I can write a paper or study law but math sucks.

drabong88 · August 2018

@ladystout08 I loved math in school, it was originally my major in college!

@kianarain my mom and MIL watch my DS now while I work. I work night shift so I take him over to my moms in the morning and sleep there for a few hours and my MIL comes to my house and stays if I happen to work a night she is off. When kid #2 comes we will be putting DS in daycare part time. My mom also watches my niece and I feel watching 3 kids will just be too much. But I have enjoyed not paying for daycare so far!

sfgiantsgamerbabe · August 2018

@ladystout08 Good luck with school! What are you studying?

I thought I would just vacuum the playroom because it was full of dog hair. Then it turned into vacuuming a rug the roomba has a hard time cleaning, then under furniture, then under the kitchen table, then our master bedroom (because when in Rome), then DS’s room, and then the office (because, again, when in Rome). Now I’m letting Jeeves (our roomba) do the rest. I think nesting mode is hitting early this pregnancy.

ladystout08 · August 2018

@drabong88 @sfgiantsgamerbabe I hate math. lol I'm going back for a B.S. in Business Administration. I got my AAS in Law Enforcement and I don't see myself going back to that world. I work in IT and maintain several professional certifications for it so I think a business degree will help me branch out into more IT management type stuff.

jgil85 · August 2018

I ate 2 everything bagels today

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