My husband and I lost our son, Grayson Craig on February 24, 2018. Our due date was June 24th so this month has been incredible hard for us. I've been avoiding all the pregnancy websites since we lost him and this is my first time back on the Bump since. We lost him due to a short cervix and a failed cerclage. We've found a support group that deal with pregnancy and infant loss but even there, I feel like no one knows my pain. After I delivered my son I started bleeding out and ended up having to be rushed to surgery which resulted in a life saving hysterectomy. It took us 2 years to get pregnant the first time and little did I know, it'd be the last. I wish I hadn't let the fear of losing him over come me and I wish I had enjoyed every minute of it. All I want is to be a mother. I don't know how to handle not only the loss of my son but also the loss of being able to carry again. It's something that I feel like no one understands. We now have to go through a carrier if we want to try and have a child of our own. This is not something I ever thought I'd have to be dealing with, let alone at the age of 28. A friend decided to start a GoFundMe in hopes that we could get support in our surrogacy process. I don't know why but I feel guilty asking people to help us with the finical cost of surrogacy even though I know people want to help us. It's just all a hard thing to deal with. Does anyone have any advice?