So I started this selfishly because I am having a really tough time and need to vent. Hmmm where to start.
1. Last night my friend invited us over for dinner next weekend and I had to say no because my husband is working from 2pm until probably midnight that day. I am really sad and depressed about the fact that I have less than 3 weeks til baby and all I am going to do between now and then is work and sit at home with my son (because I am too broke and sore to do anything fun with him).
2. I was up 4 times last night to pee, and I'm talking I had to pee so bad that turning over and getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom was physically painful. Then my son started whining around 4 again, and I finally had to yell at my husband to get up with him around 530.
3. I was so exhausted and out of it, I left for work and forgot my briefcase, which not only contained my work docs I need, but also my lunch and snacks. I realized this 20 mins after I left, and had to turn around and have my husband meet me with it at a commuter lot. Then I made it into the office with literally 2 minutes to spare before I had a telephonic hearing.
4. Work just will not let up, I am trying to get these letters done that are due tomorrow and I am constantly interrupted by clients wanting me to hold their hand on stupid crap when their cases don't even start until September and they are not my priority right now. I have appointments all day today and I have to leave right at 4 to make it to my chiro appointment on time, and we have a staff meeting at 2 that I know my boss will be late for and I'll end up being late for my appointment. Oh, by the way, my boss still is in denial that I am having a baby in less than 3 weeks. But she's never here so I have had no chance to discuss anything with her. Commuting needs to end this week, I physically just can't do it anymore, so that should be a fun conversation to try to have.
5. My blood sugar has been crazy and now I am being put on insulin. I made it to 36 and a half weeks. I am disappointed and of course with how busy work has been I have not been able to exercise much and have been super stressed and can't help but wonder if that has caused this. But who really knows.
@zande2016 Ugh I'm sorry that you're starting this week on a bad foot. I'm hoping that things get better for you. I understand what it's like to have a tough boss. I have the same thing where she doesn't believe that we are actually doing any work unless I'm in the office even though our job could literally be 100% work from home.
As for my BF - I'm sooo not a fan of this insanely hot weather. Over 90 degrees in NYC means that it feels like it's over 100 because it's just concrete everywhere. I am dying. Thank goodness it's 3 more weeks of commuting although my boss is on vacation in 2, so I will probably be on and off WFH that week as I feel like it.
@nimmle ugh I work in NYC too (live in suburbs though) and my building is somehow incapable of maintaining a comfortable temperature so it's always so hot in my office. I usually try to take a walk after I eat lunch and today I am just not sure if that's a good idea with this heat.
@zande2016 I've vetoed going outside for a walk today. It's just not worth it to try. I was dying on my commute in this morning. Even though my office is right on the hudson, it doesn't do much because I have no green near my office building. Just construction everywhere.
+1 for the ridiculous heat. I’ve been wanting to get a little blow up pool that I could sit in to help me stay cool. H got one yesterday but it’s too deep for me to sit in so I don’t event want to get in. My kids are ridiculously happy though. In protest of the too deep kiddie pool, I’m sitting in a lawn chair sweating my butt off and covering myself with and umbrella because there’s no shade. Blahhh
My BFs so far is H's car. It so old and we are waiting for it to die before he gets a new one but I had the hardest time moving around in it this morning. Being huge didn't help either. Wish he would of told me it was almost out of gas too! I was so close to being stranded. Also, I started taking miralax because OB said it was better than colace. Yeah it sure is! After one day I'm having a hard time between BM cramping and contractions. There's no winning!!! Just 2.5 wks to go.
Oh my gosh I'm so over work. 2 weeks left until summer vacation.... Between the kids being disasters and me being giant and grumpy I am just not a good teacher at this point anymore haha.... Hopefully these last few days go by quickly!
@zande2016 can you go to your friends house without your H?
TTC History:
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
My very minor BF is that DH used WD-40 on ALL THE DOORS IN THE HOUSE. Event though only a couple were squeaky. And now, the bathroom door downstairs closes on its own and it's annoying because it's a small space so every time I wash my hands in there the door constantly hits me as it closes and it's in the way. It's the bathroom where I pee most of the times so I am really not enjoying it! I don't know why he had to go through every single door...
@nimmle and @zande2016 +1 for the working in NYC/ concrete jungle of hot hell.
@KatyF0813 My fx for you to have a super fast 2 weeks! I know all the kids get nuts my husband works for the DOE and has the same experience only he isn’t pregnant!
My BF is also about work. It seems like as the weeks get closer and closer to my due date everyone is giving me more work. I think it’s because they keep thinking of things they need done and are afraid I won’t be here to do it. But I am drowning in paperwork, spreadsheets, expense reports. And can barely take my lunch breaks, or let’s be honest eat my lunch at my desk without 100 interruptions.
Next week i get to train my temp- so I’m looking forward to having someone help me do things. But I have to get so much done this week in order to properly train him next week. Then he doesn’t come back until after I go into labor. (Whenever that is lol)
@catftm2018 I am with you on the work thing too. I'm almost done with what they had planned for me to do before birth already so now they are looking to give me extra stuff to do while I work from home. I guess it's not awful since it will distract me from the wait, but I'd love an easy transition instead of having a constant stream of to-dos.
FX for everyone still working that everything goes well and that time flies by before you get to take work off. I cannot imagine having to commute or work at this point. Kudos to y’all.
Im trying really hard to be a good person. But I just want to be petty as hell right now. If you remember my complaint from a couple weeks ago, I am staying with my in-laws in Michigan rather than with my own family in Utah, while my husband continues to work in Nova Scotia. We chose Michigan because of my SIL’s wedding, which I am no longer invited to because of the newborn that I will have to care for by the time her wedding rolls around. So her family gets to spend time with DD and the newborn all summer, when I obviously would have preferred spending this time with my own family, because I thought my entire family would get to attend this wedding and my DD was asked to be the flower girl.
Well we were planning on asking the SIL and her new husband to be the godparents to the newborn. But now I really just want to leave Michigan as soon as I get the birth certificate and SSN, fly to Utah to be with my family, and apply for the passport there rather than staying in Michigan all summer. That way I can ask my brother and his wife to be the godparents because I’m so mad at my husband’s sister that I’m going crazy.
@nimmle and @catftm2018 I am right there with you on the work thing. My manager, who will be covering for me, keeps taking days off, so I have to cover for him and get everything organized and do my own work before leaving in a couple of weeks. And he’s taking vacation days my last three days before leave! Would love for things to get a little easier instead of harder....
@emsnedds girl do what you feel is best. Godparents are important in my own family and I think that they should be someone that you can depend on and feel that you LO can be well taken care of. I know it's a frustrating situation, but don't do it out of pure anger. Have you talked to you H about it?
my MIL did annoy me a bit yesterday with some comments and actions...but really my BF is work bandwagon too
I texted my boss that i was being admitted to the hospital on Thursday and FB messaged the 2 people I allow on my personal FB - do you think anything got covered while I was out? DH wouldn't bring my work cell to the hospital so I could formally put up an OOO and email my staff and today has been nothing but passive aggressive comments and whining about things sitting for 2 days from my staff. I finally snapped at one of them "well yea i was in the hospital and unable to send an email". So during my staff meeting I told them "if you don't see me on skype, assume something happened and go to the posted backup sources and initiate backup protocols". How is this not common sense? Suffice it to say HR has been staying in the 110's again today with a nice spike to 140 when I went to make a PBJ.
@emsnedds I would get petty too but I agree maybe talking to DH about it is a good idea? Although tbh I still really don't understand your SIL's decision so I'm having a hard time not being biased:)
Solidarity to those having issues at work especially with unsupportive managers and bosses, do they realize how hard it is to be so very pregnant at this stage?
Another BF is the "nurse" or assistant at my OB. She always looks at my NST as if it's not good. Then OB comes in and says everything is looking perfect. So wtf lady. Everytime she comes in concerned like "have you eaten" or "is your water cold can you drink some". I'm laying on my back in a really weird spot that I know baby doesn't like and yes, I've eaten. Btw is it possible to strap the monitor on too right? I feel like she also does that and combined with the weird incline of the bed some of the movement I feel doesnt get registered well. I don't know maybe I'm just being whiney today.
@rachelsogo@kissableviv we’d probably bring our son to my friends house if my husband wasn’t working, getting a babysitter isn’t really in the budget right now...but since H is working, I’m just not up to bringing him by myself. An outing like that is just physically too much right now. I could ask my mom to watch him but she’s here all week working for very little money so I feel too guilty to ask. And going by myself isn’t too appealing because it’ll be all couples. So I guess I’m just gonna stay home with my son.
@emsnedds I completely support your decision. I mean technically you should discuss with your H, but I’d have the same thought process as you.
@emsnedds I honestly would do the same thing. It's not even petty if you think about it. They wanted your LO in the wedding but are basically barring you from attending the reception because of having that same LO, after you arranged months of plans for even your BABY to accommodate them. I remember when you posted about the wedding situation and what they were pulling just sounded so self absorbed and immature to me, and I wouldn't really want that in my kids' godparents. If anyone is being petty it's them. Seriously. Makes my blood boil. I think you're totally justified in putting your plan into action.
My BF is addiction. I hate addiction. I hate addiction with every ounce of my being. I am so tired of it wrecking havoc on my family and feeling absolutely useless in helping. I'm so drained from having to be the calm and rational voice to intervene and I just hate it, hate it, hate it.
@emsnedds I support that plan too! For all the reasons PP have said. You want someone who is going to love and support your LO no matter what. It’s more than lousy that you’ve planned this entire huge life event around them only to have them bite you in the butt. Grr.
@d_marie_23 it really is the worst thing. I’m so sorry you have to be the voice of reason all the time and that multiple members of your family have been in it’s grips.
Thank you ladies you are all so great. I will definitely talk to DH before making a decision or booking any flights. I will also have to see how I feel after giving birth to see if I would even want to fly at that point. I do take godparents seriously and I have never had any issues with my SIL and her fiancé before now. And my brother and his wife would be equally great godparents. I’m just really wishing I was with my own family and kind of looking for any excuse to get out of here as soon as possible.
@d_marie_23 my BF is also addiction, and my family.
My bro is an alcoholic/heroin addict who I reportex to his probation officer about 4 months ago...he was put on an alcohol monitoring bracelet for 90 days and successful that whole time and got off the week before memorial day. He started drinking again that day and is back to being a dumpster fire.
Today my dad was supposed to get him from work and take him to his apt to stay with him so SIL and baby could have a break. My dad picked him up at 11, couldn't deal with him refusing to get in the car so since he wasn't drunk dropped him at his own apt where my bro told my sil to leave and she did. Like, I asked my dad to do one thing for her and he did the easy thing for him and my bro once again gets what he wants at the expense of everyone else. Its maddening.
@emsnedds Staying with in laws is harder than it sounds. Even if you get along with them. Sounds like you were going to the wedding, plans changed, and now you are free to go see your family. I agree that you should see how your birth goes and then book your flight. But I would go. Do you miss being home? I can’t imagine being away from home and pregnant.
@lindsayleigh1989 +1 for not having a name yet. We are arguing over the version of one name. We decided to make a new list of names because we couldn’t agree. DH made a list and I actually picked one off that list. Well he doesn’t want that name now. I think he was trying to call my bluff that I was okay with pulling the original name off. Out of all the things to fight over...
@chaser61 I miss DH more than anything, but it was a really hard decision to let his family spend the whole summer with DD and the newborn when I never get to see my family either. Sorry you are having such a hard time with names! It is such a long and weird process trying to choose the best name for someone you haven’t met yet.
@emsnedds I agree with everyone else! I would do the same thing and I think it’s easy to explain that you ideally would like to be with your family but made the decision based on the wedding. Keep us posted with how everything goes! @lindsayleigh1989 how annoying!! At this point I would tell him you’ll be making the decision
totally echo the pain of addiction. It’s such a sad thing to be taking over someone, and then it absolutely sucks how it effects everyone else.
zande2016
member
Re: Monday BF
1. Last night my friend invited us over for dinner next weekend and I had to say no because my husband is working from 2pm until probably midnight that day. I am really sad and depressed about the fact that I have less than 3 weeks til baby and all I am going to do between now and then is work and sit at home with my son (because I am too broke and sore to do anything fun with him).
2. I was up 4 times last night to pee, and I'm talking I had to pee so bad that turning over and getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom was physically painful. Then my son started whining around 4 again, and I finally had to yell at my husband to get up with him around 530.
3. I was so exhausted and out of it, I left for work and forgot my briefcase, which not only contained my work docs I need, but also my lunch and snacks. I realized this 20 mins after I left, and had to turn around and have my husband meet me with it at a commuter lot. Then I made it into the office with literally 2 minutes to spare before I had a telephonic hearing.
4. Work just will not let up, I am trying to get these letters done that are due tomorrow and I am constantly interrupted by clients wanting me to hold their hand on stupid crap when their cases don't even start until September and they are not my priority right now. I have appointments all day today and I have to leave right at 4 to make it to my chiro appointment on time, and we have a staff meeting at 2 that I know my boss will be late for and I'll end up being late for my appointment. Oh, by the way, my boss still is in denial that I am having a baby in less than 3 weeks. But she's never here so I have had no chance to discuss anything with her. Commuting needs to end this week, I physically just can't do it anymore, so that should be a fun conversation to try to have.
5. My blood sugar has been crazy and now I am being put on insulin. I made it to 36 and a half weeks. I am disappointed and of course with how busy work has been I have not been able to exercise much and have been super stressed and can't help but wonder if that has caused this. But who really knows.
I think that's it for now?
As for my BF - I'm sooo not a fan of this insanely hot weather. Over 90 degrees in NYC means that it feels like it's over 100 because it's just concrete everywhere. I am dying. Thank goodness it's 3 more weeks of commuting although my boss is on vacation in 2, so I will probably be on and off WFH that week as I feel like it.
My BFs so far is H's car. It so old and we are waiting for it to die before he gets a new one but I had the hardest time moving around in it this morning. Being huge didn't help either. Wish he would of told me it was almost out of gas too! I was so close to being stranded. Also, I started taking miralax because OB said it was better than colace. Yeah it sure is! After one day I'm having a hard time between BM cramping and contractions. There's no winning!!! Just 2.5 wks to go.
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
@KatyF0813 My fx for you to have a super fast 2 weeks! I know all the kids get nuts my husband works for the DOE and has the same experience only he isn’t pregnant!
Next week i get to train my temp- so I’m looking forward to having someone help me do things. But I have to get so much done this week in order to properly train him next week. Then he doesn’t come back until after I go into labor. (Whenever that is lol)
Im trying really hard to be a good person. But I just want to be petty as hell right now. If you remember my complaint from a couple weeks ago, I am staying with my in-laws in Michigan rather than with my own family in Utah, while my husband continues to work in Nova Scotia. We chose Michigan because of my SIL’s wedding, which I am no longer invited to because of the newborn that I will have to care for by the time her wedding rolls around. So her family gets to spend time with DD and the newborn all summer, when I obviously would have preferred spending this time with my own family, because I thought my entire family would get to attend this wedding and my DD was asked to be the flower girl.
Well we were planning on asking the SIL and her new husband to be the godparents to the newborn. But now I really just want to leave Michigan as soon as I get the birth certificate and SSN, fly to Utah to be with my family, and apply for the passport there rather than staying in Michigan all summer. That way I can ask my brother and his wife to be the godparents because I’m so mad at my husband’s sister that I’m going crazy.
I texted my boss that i was being admitted to the hospital on Thursday and FB messaged the 2 people I allow on my personal FB - do you think anything got covered while I was out? DH wouldn't bring my work cell to the hospital so I could formally put up an OOO and email my staff and today has been nothing but passive aggressive comments and whining about things sitting for 2 days from my staff. I finally snapped at one of them "well yea i was in the hospital and unable to send an email". So during my staff meeting I told them "if you don't see me on skype, assume something happened and go to the posted backup sources and initiate backup protocols". How is this not common sense? Suffice it to say HR has been staying in the 110's again today with a nice spike to 140 when I went to make a PBJ.
Solidarity to those having issues at work especially with unsupportive managers and bosses, do they realize how hard it is to be so very pregnant at this stage?
Another BF is the "nurse" or assistant at my OB. She always looks at my NST as if it's not good. Then OB comes in and says everything is looking perfect. So wtf lady. Everytime she comes in concerned like "have you eaten" or "is your water cold can you drink some". I'm laying on my back in a really weird spot that I know baby doesn't like and yes, I've eaten.
Btw is it possible to strap the monitor on too right? I feel like she also does that and combined with the weird incline of the bed some of the movement I feel doesnt get registered well. I don't know maybe I'm just being whiney today.
@emsnedds I completely support your decision. I mean technically you should discuss with your H, but I’d have the same thought process as you.
My BF is addiction. I hate addiction. I hate addiction with every ounce of my being. I am so tired of it wrecking havoc on my family and feeling absolutely useless in helping. I'm so drained from having to be the calm and rational voice to intervene and I just hate it, hate it, hate it.
@d_marie_23 it really is the worst thing. I’m so sorry you have to be the voice of reason all the time and that multiple members of your family have been in it’s grips.
my BF we finally short listed 3 baby names last night... Tonight DH told me he doesn't like any of them. I am about to lose my mind!!
My bro is an alcoholic/heroin addict who I reportex to his probation officer about 4 months ago...he was put on an alcohol monitoring bracelet for 90 days and successful that whole time and got off the week before memorial day. He started drinking again that day and is back to being a dumpster fire.
Today my dad was supposed to get him from work and take him to his apt to stay with him so SIL and baby could have a break. My dad picked him up at 11, couldn't deal with him refusing to get in the car so since he wasn't drunk dropped him at his own apt where my bro told my sil to leave and she did. Like, I asked my dad to do one thing for her and he did the easy thing for him and my bro once again gets what he wants at the expense of everyone else. Its maddening.
@lindsayleigh1989 +1 for not having a name yet. We are arguing over the version of one name. We decided to make a new list of names because we couldn’t agree. DH made a list and I actually picked one off that list. Well he doesn’t want that name now. I think he was trying to call my bluff that I was okay with pulling the original name off. Out of all the things to fight over...
Sorry you are having such a hard time with names! It is such a long and weird process trying to choose the best name for someone you haven’t met yet.
@lindsayleigh1989 how annoying!! At this point I would tell him you’ll be making the decision
totally echo the pain of addiction. It’s such a sad thing to be taking over someone, and then it absolutely sucks how it effects everyone else.