Missed miscarriage — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Missed miscarriage

Just been for my first scan (11 weeks pregnant) and found out that baby stopped developing around a month ago. I'm so very upset obviously and terrified of what comes next, can anyone offer some insight?

Re: Missed miscarriage

  • I am so sorry for your loss.
    Did the doctors talk to you about letting your body pass on your own or going in for a D/c ?

    Again I am so sorry for your loss. I have had 3 miscarriages and now just waiting on the first of the year for my husband and I to try again. Just remember to take it a day at a time and allow yourself to grieve. There is no riggt or wrong way to handle things like this.

  • The doctor said it's completely my choice. I have no idea what to do, I want it to be over with asap but I also don't want to mess with nature. It may sound selfish but it's my birthday at the weekend and I don't particularly want to go in for d/c and miscarry on my birthday
  • Loading the player...
  • Have you had any signs like bleeding or cramping? I started spotting at 9w5d found out at 10w there was only a sac measuring 6w. I also felt different when I woke up at 10w, like my symptoms stopped. I opted for natural and MC at 10w5d. If I didn't have any signs I probably would have done a D&C. Waiting those 5 days was emotionally difficult. That being said you have to make the decision based on what's best for you.
    _______________________________________________
    TTC#1 July 2015 
    • BFP: 9/16/15 — MC: 11/8/15 Blighted Ovum
    • BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
    TTC#2 April 2019 
    • BFP: 9/12/19 — EDD 5/15/20

  • I'm so sorry for your loss! I had two MMC and just got home from my second D&C. What made my decision easy is no sign of a natural MC happening anytime soon, plus my cervix still being closed. It's been nearly two weeks since I got the news and when I arrived at the hospital today, I still had no spotting or bleeding.

    I guess the downside would be they are pricey, and even though the actual procedure takes 15-20 minutes, I had to be at the hospital for about 5 hours. But I am glad it's all behind me.

    Take care of yourself and good luck in your decision. Though, I am sorry you are in this position.
  • I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. I know the sadness is overwhelming.

    I'm in the middle of something similar. I found out about our MMC at 8 weeks 2 days last Thursday. I did not have any bleeding, but we knew something might go wrong because my progesterone had been low. Doc said we could wait, take cytotec to induce mc, or do a D&C. We opted to do cytotec. I took it Friday and Saturday and so far I have not had any bleeding. We will try cytotec again on Friday, and if it still doesn't work, we will probably do a D&C.

    All three options are heartbreaking and shitty, but there are pluses and minuses to each. The pro of D&C, I think, is it is quick and the outcome is certain. You get it done and then can start to heal. The downside is it is nerve-wracking (at least to me) to be in a hospital, anesthesia, etc. Also, it is expensive. With cytotec, it can happen from the comfort of your own home. But sometimes it doesn't work, and I've heard it can be painful. Waiting for a natural mc, I would think, is hard due to the waiting. But many people feel more comfortable letting the body handle it on its own.

    Just my thoughts. Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. This board has been so helpful for me. It is good to know we're not alone.

    Me: 33     H: 36

    Married: 12/14/13   DS: 1/29/09

    BFP2: 10/9/15  MMC: 11/12/15

    BFP3: 4/6/16   DD: 12/12/16


  • I just miscarried. We saw the heartbeat at 8 weeks, they said I was measuring at 7 weeks. At 10 week appointment there was no heartbeat, and baby only grew small amount from last appointment. I opted for d&c since I couldn't wait and didn't want to see. I was fine for first 2 days. I then had horrible cramping days 3-6, my Dr said it was contractions and my uterus shrinking back to normal size. Days 7-10 I was passing quarter-sized clumps which was scary to me. Dr said normal, as my body was getting rid of anything missed. I'm feeling better today, but it sucks. And waiting for bleeding to stop is also sad, bc then it's really over. Then I'm a bit nervous about trying again, aND the possibility of it happening again. Hang in there, gets better each day.
  • Sorry for your loss. I had a healthy scan at 8w6d, went back at 12w6d and baby had stopped growing 3 weeks prior and didn't have a heartbeat. I had no sign of my body doing things on its own and like you, I wanted it over asap. I opted for the d&c but had 4 days between finding out and when they scheduled my procedure. Those days were hell for me. I felt like until the physical part was over, I couldn't start emotionally processing what had happened. Also, my doctor said that after 7 weeks, you have a higher chance of needing a d&c to get all 'parts of conception' removed. You may want to ask your doctor what his/her experience is with that. I had an ideal healing time afterwards and if I ever had to make that decision again (once is more than enough for anyone), I would opt for the d&c again.
  • I am a Baby Loss Family Advisor. Please feel free to email me: [email protected] I would be more than happy to present you with all the options you may have during this time. I hope you will treat yourself to some pampering this weekend, it sounds like you really need it! 

    P.S. My birthday is tomorrow, so we share the same birthday weekend :) 
  • I would opt to try Motherwort. It helps balance hormones quickly and could bring on contractions. It is a natural alternative, something to try before Cytotec or a D&C.
  • Thank you for your kind messages and advice everyone. I opted to have cytotec on Monday and within two hours the bleeding started and 3 hours after that the worst was over. Admittedly I did not expect it to be as painful as it was but I am glad it's now almost over, just normal period cramps now.
  • I'm really sorry for your loss. My levels were still increasing despite having a blighted ovum an do didn't want to walk around for another month waiting to see if I'd miscarry . My doctor said cyotec doesn't work a lot of the time especially if your levels aren't a dropping and can be painful . I opted for d and c . It wasn't bad just emotional but I imagine any option will be . I personally didn't want to see the clots and stuff . I just wanted to move forward. But everybody is different . Some people find seeing the clots come out and having severe cramping gives them closure .
  • Hello. I'm so sorry for your loss it is truly a terrible feeling that I can relate to. I've been through three mcs and my last one was a mmc. I decided to have a D&C because I just wanted it to be "over". I didn't want to wait around to start bleeding. The surgery was so easy for me I was actually able to go to work the next afternoon. I didn't have to take anything stronger than ibuprofen, but everyone is different. So the physical recover was the easy part for me..After the D&C I was and still am very emotional but getting stronger every day. i have gone to counseling and joined a support group and it really helps to talk to people who have been through it. Take all the time you for yourself. Making my mental and physical health a priority has really helped me! Treat yourself to some tlc you deserve it.
  • @BriDaily
    I have been drinking mugwort tea after being told just shy of 8 weeks that the gestational sac was located in my lower cervix and measured 5-6 weeks, and I should pass it within the next couple weeks. I have had nothing so far and it is really emotionally killing me. Are you still available as a baby loss adviser?
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards