July 2018 Moms

Weekday Randoms - 4/30

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Re: Weekday Randoms - 4/30

  • @foxbaby YES! Wouldn't that be wonderful!


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  • @foxbaby2016 yes!  Speaking of maternity leave...

    I still haven’t heard back about working remotely when the baby is born.  My boss told me they were going to discuss it and get back to me two weeks ago.  I sent a follow-up email (asking if he had any questions or concerns I could address) last Thursday and he hasn’t responded to that yet either.  I just want to know already!  I’m quitting if I can’t work remotely so I’ll need to make plans to make some money if that doesn’t work out and I also would like to give our current sitter a few months notice to fill my kids’ spots.  I’m part-time so I technically don’t get any maternity leave other than unpaid time.  So I also want to talk to him about that (if I am going to be working from home).  I just hate the uncertainty and hope he gets back to me soon.
    Married 9/19/09
    Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
    TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
    TTC#1  starting Nov. 2009
    3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
    TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 
    TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks 
    Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15.  Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15.  Forever in our hearts.
    TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @foxbaby2016 me too! I’m struggling bc there’s so many things I need to do here (including training someone to do my entire job while I’m out) but I just have no motivation to get it done!

    @Sarafuss that’s so frustrating and actually pretty unprofessional for him for him to just not respond with anything. I hope it works out for you and you can work remotely.

    So we had a pretty productive weekend and got the nursery painted! I also tackled some clothes/boxes that I had in there. I was able to get rid of quite a bit and I’m feeling super accomplished :) 
  • @ashbub714 it’s actually pretty normal for him to take forever to respond but it still sucks!  He’s not in the office that I work in.  A totally different state actually.  And he’s very busy so I get it (kind of).  Usually the follow-up email does the trick and he’ll respond quickly after that.  If it were anything else I wouldn’t care but I’m stressing about this of course so I’d like to know ASAP.
    Married 9/19/09
    Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
    TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
    TTC#1  starting Nov. 2009
    3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
    TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 
    TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks 
    Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15.  Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15.  Forever in our hearts.
    TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @Sarafuss Ugh, that is so frustrating and a total lack of respect for your time. Did you let him know that you'll be looking at other options if you cannot work remotely?

    @ashbub714 Yay for a productive weekend! I've been decluttering my house as well and it just feels so GOOD. I plan to finish the nursery this week/weekend. 
  • @foxbaby2016 yes!!! the insomnia has hit and i have no motivation haha 
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


  • @Sarafuss that's so obnoxious, I hope you get an answer soon. I am in a similar boat where I've been asking to discuss maternity leave and my boss keeps putting me off. But I am also trying to combine the talk with my annual review/asking for a raise, and I know there is one other person who is also overdue for an annual review/raise, and my boss has been doing  the same thing to her. She's overdue since December, mine was due in February, so I know she will go first. It's incredibly inconsiderate and yet I can't exactly leave for another job at 7 months pregnant so I feel powerless. 

    Summer from about June - September is our BUSY season, so I know she is going to give me a hard time about taking the leave I want, but sorry I didn't choose my due date. One of the other attorneys is having surgery the day I turn 36 weeks, which is also the day I had planned to start working from home full time leading up to giving birth, and I have a feeling she will tell me no because the office will be short staffed. I am going to have to put my foot down and tell her that this is a reasonable accommodation I am asking for (hinting that she will be discriminating against me by not allowing it), given that I can do my job 100% remotely without it affecting my job performance, and I will be too pregnant, especially with complications and the need for twice weekly monitoring, to drive 2.5 - 3 hours every day and be 1.5 hours from my hospital/doctors. The joys of working in a small office. 
  • So I called DH in a PANIC this morning... I looked at one of the litter boxes without my glasses on and saw a ton of dark brown/blackish grossness. I thought they were dying and pooping blood. I look a little closer and it’s potting soil and rocks  :D
    Apparently one of them knocked a potted plant into the box and DH picked up the plant but not the soil and rocks. My eyesight is getting so bad! 

    Zero motivation for anything work related here! Of course we’ve had several people quit at my job and they’re literally begging for coverage but I can only do so much. Hire better people and you wouldn’t have this issue! 
  • Actually excited for this week (for once) 
    - Mondays go by quick because its payroll which consumes the whole day. 
    - I have a doctors appointment tomorrow so I wont be in until 11AM
    - Wednesday I wont get into work until 12PM, have a meeting until 1PM and then we are all going out to lunch to celebrate a co-workers birthday
    - Full day Thursday
    - Friday my boss is letting us leave at 1PM because we usually do it once a month but she forgot last month 

    Also, the girl I work with leaves for vacation after work Thursday and doesn't come back for 2 Mondays- which I am SO excited about haha

    Officially 12 more weeks of work for me- 12 work, 12 off.  Cant wait!  I wish maternity leave was paid tho- I'm literally saving every penny just to be able to take off the 12 weeks.  I feel like I'll have this large clump of cash and poof then it will be gone.
  • @babygagnon2018 That sounds like a great week! I'm jealous, mine is going to suck but I'm just going to smile anyways. Or try to force it.  I wish my leave was paid too, I've been desperate to take a PTO day but I've been saving all those up so I'm able to have some PTO to use during leave, but the idea of not having a paycheck for a while freaks me out even though we've been pretty good about saving.

  • @foxbaby2016 In my initial email I hinted at quitting if I can’t work remotely because of the commute, cost of childcare and general craziness of having 4 kids.  But I didn’t say it specifically.

    @zande2016 that’s so frustrating!  I hope it works out!  I am also hoping to start working remotely at about 37 weeks but I haven’t brought that up yet since I haven’t gotten any response yet.  
    Married 9/19/09
    Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
    TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
    TTC#1  starting Nov. 2009
    3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
    TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 
    TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks 
    Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15.  Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15.  Forever in our hearts.
    TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @acunamatada last night i noticed something near the bed and freaked that the cat had thrown up and i had to clean it before going to bed. I looked closer it was a toy screw that DH just kicked to the side instead of picking up.
  • Aloha from Maui, just dropping in to say hi...I'm jet lagged...head over to bitchfest in a few as I'll be sharing the nightmare that was getting here yesterday!

    @foxbaby2016 work motivation has been severely lacking!
    @babygagnon2018 I'm with you on the unpaid leave although in all fairness with California disability plus my private disability insurance I should be ok. Reminder for me to get that process started.

    @wildtot @acunamatada sorry about the eyesight worsening, but lol at what you thought you saw

    @Sarafuss frustrating to say the least to not know at this point, I understand being busy but this is very important for you. My boss sat on finding a replacement for me while I'm gone and now it's may and I'm sorting all the resumes and doing interviews! As you said, small companies...
    @zande2016 you go girl, you're due for a review and a raise and who gives a crap that you're pregnant! Men don't care, they just go and ask. I have to remind myself to feel empowered for these things but I completely understand how hard it is. Fx crossed for you:)

    I'll try to disconnect from my phone this week but hoping to jump in and say hi here and there, hope you have a good week ladies! Now, for the bitchfest....

  • +1 for no motivation.  I've also eaten 4 of the 12 donuts I brought into the office today... no shame.  My hips are killing me, i'm way behind on water intake, I'm ready for sleep...I will not be coming back in this week.  Boss said I didn't have to come in until after maternity leave and I may just do that...it's lonely at home but not as painful.

    @zande2016 I wish you luck.  We're in our annual review season now...no one's gotten raises in 5 years so I expect nothing as an employee but I have to write/deliver 13 reviews and give feedback on 3 more and it's a complete mess this year with the HR systems.  We're also doing some new revamped eval for job level and all are due by Sept...so I'll be doing them for all my staff and myself before June to be safe.
    @Sarafuss that's so frustrating, I know i drop the ball with my staff sometimes, but if I got a reminder email I would be all over it!
    @babygagnon2018 same here - it'll end up being mostly unpaid due to changed vacation policies.  I did realize today though that since our regular "unlimited" vacation doesn't apply/cannot be used for maternity leave I very well may request a long weekend here or there and/or take my birthday off.  I was feeling guilty since i'll be gone for probably 10 weeks...but F it.  They are adults and can deal.
    @wildtot @acunamatada ; hear that - without my glasses I can't see 2 inches from my face and do that all the time.
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    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • @gingerbride26 that sounds awful! We all expect and receive our annual raises around here, but they always happen at least a few months late. Pretty sure my boss knows we will just look elsewhere if we aren't negotiating on a yearly basis. Last year I got free parking (which cost me $230 a month) along with a smaller salary increase, this year I plan to negotiate a smaller salary increase again in exchange for more time off for maternity leave. That's a deal I am willing to make since I have no intention of actually returning for very long, and just want more time with the baby before having to figure out my next move. 
  • Well my maternity leave just got a little more complicated... looks like my company was bought out with the hopes of closing while I'm gone.  At this point I'm hoping I have a job to come back to. 
    Me: 31 DH: 34 :heart: Married: April 2016
    TTC December 2016
    BFP 2/28/17 // CP 3/1/17
    MFI Diagnosis: Aug 2017
    BFP 11/1/17 // DS born 6/18
    TTC January 2019
    BFP 3/21/19 // D&C (MMC) 5/8/19
  • Oh man @MrsMiller8588 - got my fingers crossed for you!  You're actually lucky - especially if you're filing for FMLA, they're not allowed to terminate your position while you're out.  I would also bet there's a period of time after you're back where you're protected too, but I'm not sure.

    My best friend's company was bought out while she was pregnant and her position was eliminated when she was 7 months along.  
  • We made progress on converting our office into a nursery! Moved my husband's desk out, mounted the TV, and built two nightstands for the master bedroom.

    There is still soooo much to do though :( just thinking about it is overwhelming. I have a pretty large house but no storage space. So basically in order to move my desk into its new place, we have to move two bookshelves that are just full of crap. Bleh.  I am going to try and knock it out this week and weekend


  • Has anyone tried kinesiology tape with their pregnancy? I just saw something on Pinterest about it helping and it looks like it would be a lot better and easier than a belly band (mine makes my pants fall down!)
  • @zande2016 see you are smart lawyers who know how to negotiate - we're complacent project people who just bend over and take it ;-)  I'm very frank with my employees, most of us stay because we like our specific account in the a-hole parent company, we like our boss, we are very flexible on dr visits/kids/home repairs and working remote, and we all hate change.  I fully expect to lose a handful of good people this year when they realize we're probably never getting raises again.

    @MichelleAG05 and @MrsMiller8588 not 100% accurate about FMLA - you cannot be fired in connection with/because of the FMLA leave, however your position can be eliminated as part of a wide-spread reduction/layoff even if you are on FMLA - its part of the management layoff training I have to go through when we have a major reduction.  It is kind of grey and if you feel you were discriminated against you can get a lawyer and fight it, but it's not a 100% guarantee of continued employment. If they're closing the whole company then they wouldn't be expected to keep the company in business for 1 person on leave.  That sucks and is complicated in terms of unemployment and "ability to work" while on medical leave.  FX for you - if it does happen I hope you get an amazing package and time to job hunt :(

    @owl_momma i love KT! haven't used it on the belly since i've been mostly just staying off my feet but use it with other joint issues for my hips, knees, ankles, back (esp on disney trips).  It takes some practice to apply correctly, there's lots of youtube videos, and be VERY careful when you take it off - in the shower/tub is best and go slow.  That stuff STICKS.
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    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @MichelleAG05 If I was going to be terminated I'd rather find out while I was gone than after coming back! I mean I *think* my office will probably be safe since there isn't overlap in my region between the 2 companies, but you never know. 
    Me: 31 DH: 34 :heart: Married: April 2016
    TTC December 2016
    BFP 2/28/17 // CP 3/1/17
    MFI Diagnosis: Aug 2017
    BFP 11/1/17 // DS born 6/18
    TTC January 2019
    BFP 3/21/19 // D&C (MMC) 5/8/19
  • @MrsMiller8588 ugh that’s stressful! I hope you’re right about your office being safe. I guess if there’s a silver lining, it’s probably better to lose your job when you’re planning on being off work anyway.  But still, crappy situation.

    I had a mini breakdown when I got home tonight. I’m so exhausted, horrible heartburn, no appetite, headache, cough (got a cold from my son...again...), awful sciatica pain. I’ve been fighting sleepiness and struggling to stay awake while driving for weeks now. I slept 10 hours last night and I still struggled while driving home tonight. Then I found out my husband is probably working “late” every day this week but he won’t tell me how late/what
    exactly that means. Everything is so vague with him because he sucks at communicating. It’s so hard trying to plan for my son’s week and childcare when he can’t commit To his schedule this week. And i am officially on my own for my all appointments the next two weeks. Hospital hours, meeting potential new doctors/midwives, midwife and MFM appointments, interviewing a new babysitter...I’m on my own with it all and I’m just overwhelmed. I’m also in so much pain but I have no time to see the chiropractor. Juggling all these appointments with work and my son and just life is really getting to me. it’s so stressful trying to get all my work done, go to all these appointments, and still have time to see my son, do things around the house, or rest. Sorry for the rant. I just want this week to be over. Too bad it’s only Monday. 


  • @gingerbride26 I'll have to check out the YouTube videos! I've had the chiropractor apply it to my back and it makes such a difference! 
  • @owl_momma I used some old KT tape on my belly and for the 15 minutes it lasted it felt AMAZING! I kept meaning to buy more that would actually stick and not be old but kinda forgot about it. I did use KT tape for shin splints years ago and it was both amazing and would last for like a week, even with showers and baths. I just might have to pick some up again now that you've reminded me! :)
  • Holy moly the night ended a little ridiculously! So DS was still up when we went to bed, at around 9 ish. DH finally installed a camera so we were laughing at him and watching him crawl around. When we went to bed he started yelling so I went in to tell him that wasn't ok...he had three red caps on his fingers that looked like wire caps. I asked him wear he got them, freaking out, he was like, "Just nowhere. They are finger rockets!" And I was like, no where did you get them, and finally figured out it was from 3 wires sticking up from the floor under the radiator. I managed to get teh caps back on without touching the wires and told DS that we were watching him and he better not touch them again, the wires were dangerous and could shock him really bad so he needed to leave them alone. It lasted 5 minutes before he snagged them again but I saw so went back in, recapped, yelled at him, and he finally went to bed. at 10. Anyway no idea if the wires are even live but WTF? Now I have to go out to the store and spend money to buy a wire tester to find out if they are live (then hopefully return it, lol) but he can't sleep in there until I figure it out! The previous owners here are killing me. Like, wtf were you thinking not putting those wires in the wall? Are there live wires under the radiator in our house? I'm no heating expert/electrician but that seems like a poor choice, right? We bought a house built in 1979 because we thought it would be less work than the 1879 farmhouse we wanted. But these guys seem to be filled with crazy DIY notions that have really harmed us, from replacing the pipes with crap to whatever this is. It's just obnoxious.
  • @SmashJam yikes that’s crazy!! Thank goodness for the video monitor! Wires underneath the radiator definitely sounds pretty shady! Hopefully they’re not live. Home fixes are a funny thing (not really) I didn’t think I’d have to do anything to my house built in 2014, but we have had to do lots of things! You never can guess! (It’s definitely less work than the 1883 farmhouse we lived in though)
  • @Sarafuss Yay, that's great news! Now you can relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

    @lindsayleigh1989 I'm in the SAME boat with my husband...whenever I bring up names, he literally just walks away or flops down dramatically and gives zero input. It's May and I'm due at the very beginning of July so we have two months to figure this out. It's starting to stress me out.  Do you guys have any ideas at all?
  • @smashjam that would stress me out. I hope they aren't live and you can just tuck them back down (assuming there is a hole)
  • @SmashJam who thought that would be a good idea?? Unbelievable. I hope they’re not live! Finger rockets though... Too funny  :D 
  • millpemillpe member
    @lindsayleigh1989 I'm stressed out we picked our name too easily without enough thought! So I guess we find reasons to obsess about things no matter what. We had just used the baby name app (like tinder) and after a couple days talked about our matches. DH told me his favorite couple names and I picked from there and said let's try it out for awhile. We started calling baby by that name and then started telling people and can't turn back now! Lol
    Me: 31 DH: 34 :heart: Married: April 2016
    TTC December 2016
    BFP 2/28/17 // CP 3/1/17
    MFI Diagnosis: Aug 2017
    BFP 11/1/17 // DS born 6/18
    TTC January 2019
    BFP 3/21/19 // D&C (MMC) 5/8/19
  • @MrsMiller8588 what is the name of this magical app!?!?  Since the husbands take the phones in the bathroom it might get perused more than note cards!
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    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I went in to the hospital yesterday for what I hoped was a quick visit to get my potassium level up and it’s coming up slowly so I’m here another night.  :( I’m super emotional and just want to go home.  And the stupid IV potassium burns like hell.  And one of the MFMs I’ve never met before (who has crappy bedside manner) came in on rounds and got me all upset ***TW: infant loss***

    because he brought up my daughter that passed from cri du chat and was saying something about checking with my genetic counselor about this baby possibly having the same thing.  Um no, this baby is fine and everything looks good and that’s not why I’m here.  Why would you bring that up?
    Married 9/19/09
    Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
    TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
    TTC#1  starting Nov. 2009
    3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
    TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 
    TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks 
    Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15.  Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15.  Forever in our hearts.
    TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • wildtotwildtot member
    I think my frequent peeing at work has resulted in a clogged toilet...
  • @Sarafuss I'm so sorry you're going through that. I hope they're able to get the levels up quickly so you can go home, and ignore that stupid MFM, he clearly needs to work on his bedside manner. I assume you've already had genetic testing done this pregnancy and no one has raised any concerns, so why would he raise a concern now - seems like he didn't even bother reviewing your chart/test results before bringing that up. Ugh. 
  • I think my ability to focus and get work done has seriously decreased lately. I start working on something and within 5 minutes I'm like, I have to pee, I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, I better check facebook/the bump/my phone and then go raid the kitchen. 
  • @Sarafuss I’m sorry you’re dealing with that. I hope everything gets to where it should be soon! Why the heck would he bring that up? Without having any evidence of an issue with this baby it’s completely out of line/insensitive to say that to someone.
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