PAIF check in w/o 03/17

linz36 · March 2018

Note: This thread will include discussion of infertility and loss. If these topics are triggering for you, please take care of yourself while reading and posting here.

This thread is for those of us who went through infertility testing and treatments before becoming pregnant. Many of us have had different struggles to get to this place and face different anxiety and concerns now. This thread is for us to support each other, and we hope it will be a safe space. Though this thread starts on Saturdays, please feel free to post here at any time during the week, whether for good news or bad. Consider this an ongoing conversation.

This thread is for those who have experienced infertility. The struggles we discuss may or may not apply to those who became pregnant easily. If you have not experienced infertility, please be considerate and sensitive if you feel the need to post in this thread.

linz36 · March 2018

Good Morning everyone!!!! I hope you guys are doing awesome.

So I’m 5w5d today and I’m feeling pretty good. I’ve got my first ultrasound on Tuesday and I’m so excited!!!! I’m hoping to see a little heartbeat so I can relax a little bit. I’m no longer POAS everyday so that’s progress. But I still can’t believe I’m pregnant!

So far I haven’t been able to keep my mouth shut about this pregnancy. My husband and I originally agreed to tell everyone at 12 weeks but I told a few friends, a few coworkers, my boss and my mom and he told his sisters. So we are not doing a good job of keeping this a secret. I mentioned to my sister that I didn’t want to tell too many people or get too excited as I was afraid I’ll jinx it. She logically reminded me that telling people or getting excited would have absolutely no effect on the baby so I need to get over it. Surprisingly that helped a little bit lol.

I’m feeling pretty good overall except for the fatigue and constant meat cravings (I’m vegetarian lol). I started to notice a little morning sickness over the past few days but it’s not bad so I’m thankful!

How are you guys doing?

middleschoolmommy · March 2018

I've been so tired since I got my bfp!! I am still, very impatiently, waiting for my first ultrasound on Thursday. I think I'll be 7 weeks by then, but I'm not sure which is why I'm having the dating ultrasound! I've also finally stopped poas every day and I agree that this is progress.

I've told exactly 4 people besides DH. I'll tell my work friends after Easter, which will be after the ultrasound, and everyone else at DS 4th bday party at the end of April. I always wanted my kids close together, but now I'm just thankful I'm having another.

herewegoagain3rd · March 2018

Hello ladies. I am new to the board, but I am glad I clicked on this post! We just found out we are pregnant again after 4 years of secondary infertility. This news came as a shock since we were on break from really trying until we had mote money saved for IVF.

I am a nervous wreck about the whole thing. I am trying to stay positive but my mind always goes to my loss 2 years ago. So far, I have had two blood draws. The first was48 hours ago and my 273 hcg and 13 progesterone. Today's was 537 hcg and 25 progesterone. I was really hoping the number would be 550 or higher to feel comfortable but I am trying to tell myself that those numbers are good too.

We plan on telling our families at Easter because I really feel like I would like the extra support right now.

lurvleybunchococonuts · March 2018

My cats were little demons last night and would not let me sleep. Thankfully I was able to take a good 2 hour nap earlier in the late am so I'm pretty good now.
Back story for me... I'm a ftm, was dx'd with PCOS this past January after a year TTC with no luck (many loooong annov cycles). We were waiting a cycle before getting started on further testing (hsg and sa) until after my mom's wedding (2 weekends ago) so we did a low dose letrozole cycle to see if it would work for inducing ovulation. Well it worked VERY well as we got our positive the morning of my mom's wedding

I hope it's okay if I post here. I know I'm like an "IF lite" story and am soooooo thankful for not having to go through some of the more invasive testing and procedures.
Had our followup appt this past weekend and seeing that tiny flutter of a heartbeat made all those months of stuggling so worth it

can't wait for the next 3 weeks to pass so we can check on the little dot again

middleschoolmommy · March 2018

@lurvleybunchococonuts you can totally post here. I also have pcos. I did visit a RE about 2 years ago, but he basically refused to help me... Twice. So, though I had all the preliminary tests, I didn't do much else. *tw*Clomid got me a bfp, but ended with chemical pregnancy *tw*
I also have really long cycles. In fact, I didn't have a cycle at all last November or December. I was completely shocked to get a bfp this month. Our Valentines celebration miracle Lol
So glad you got to see the heartbeat!!!!! I'm going crazy waiting for my first ultrasound. I'm dying to see if I'm 7 weeks or only 6 weeks!

lurvleybunchococonuts · March 2018

@middleschoolmommy ugh... That sucks that the RE was unhelpful

hooray for your Valentine's day miracle!! I was completely convinced our medicated cycle was unsuccessful

I hope your days pass quickly! Hooray for the countdown to Thursday

MojieJo · March 2018

Cautiously checking in. You guys will understand, I think. I'm currently pregnant after FET (my twins were also conceived via FET).

We tried for over a year on our own before both pregnancies and went through mutiple rounds of IUI the first time around (three BFN's and a ** TW ** CP). No explanation. Just unexplained infertility, which is hard on me. I almost wish I had a "real" diagnosis, so I could have an explanation for why this is so hard for us.

I never expected to have problems getting pregnant or staying pregnant, but I always had an "irrational" (doesn't seem so irrational now) fear that I would, though. Sometimes I feel like I brought this on myself, like it was a self-fulfilling prophecy, but I know that's ridiculous.

We've gotten BFP's from both our attempts at FET, so at least that seems to go well for us. It's nice to have something go right.

** TW ** I'm trying to be optimistic about this pregnancy since my last time around with my twins was so smooth, but I had a teeny bit of spotting last weekend, then a larger, longer bleed (not fresh blood) on Wednesday. My RE says everything is probably fine (especially since my first ultrasound, after the first round of spotting was good and since there weren't any cramps involved), but it's scary. ** TW **

Waiting to see the heartbeat on Monday and then I think I'll be able to relax just a little. I know I'm going to struggle the entire pregnancy, anxiety-wise, though. I just wish I could sit back and enjoy it, though, especially since we're probably done after this baby.

Hang in there mommas. There's light at the end of the infertility tunnel!

kbrown2385 · March 2018

New to the board since I just got my bfp yesterday. *TW* After having 2 losses this past year we decided to stop trying for a while. *end tw* I needed a mental break and to focus on getting healthy. I decided just a few weeks ago to start taking metformin for my insulin resistance. Was very shocked to realize I was two days late and got a blazing positive. Surprisingly enough I am completely calm about everything. When I found out I was pregnant this past October I had such anxiety issues, so this is a nice change and a little weird to me. Hopefully it continues.

So far not many symptoms except for some cramping. I feel like I’m keeping myself from becoming too attached for now. I’m sure once we see the heartbeat I’ll get there, but I guess I’m being cautious. Wishing the best for everyone here!

eahayes · March 2018

Hi all-- happy to have the support of this board! *TW* I had 3 miscarriages before going the RE route, with an eventual diagnosis of low ovarian reserve/quality. We tried Clomid with an IUI (unsuccessful, despite my good response) before deciding to be aggressive with IVF to hopefully have embryos to freeze for future little ones! After two back to back retrievals, we now have 4 girls and 2 boys that made it back from biopsy and are healthy *end TW* Just found out last week we are pregnant after the first transfer was successful! I am so happy but still in denial. Wondering why I don't have more symptoms yet and overthinking everything I do feel. Starting to have insomnia, even though I think it may be due to anxiety about the situation.. and tired, but crediting that to the insomnia! Looking forward to the first ultrasound a week from Monday.
Anyway, happy to be here and meet you all!

lurvleybunchococonuts · March 2018

@MojieJo I can't imagine the added stress of unexplained IF. When I was dx'd PCOS it sucked but also was a relief at the same time I globally had a "reason"/explaination to what's wrong. Unexplained IF is so difficult

Spotting at all is scary let alone after fighting so hard simply for the chance at a positive hpt. *hugs* I hope the ultrasound helps put your mind at ease and that the spotting goes away completely.

MojieJo · March 2018

@lurvleybunchococonuts That's exactly why it's so hard! If I had a reason, it would be hard, but at least I would know WHY and have some sort of closure. Not knowing is so difficult because it seems like my body should work and it just...doesn't.

Everyone else in my family and my husband's family get pregnant so easily (several "accidents" that I'd have been thrilled to have plus immediate successes when they're trying), so sometimes it feels like an extra added slap in the face.

Thank you so much for the hugs and kind words. I'm trying to take things one day at a time, but it's hard, even without an underlying anxiety disorder to make me feel even less out of control. It really does help to have other people to talk to who understand what I'm going through.

linz36 · March 2018

@lurvleybunchococonuts you are more than welcome here. I consider myself "IF lite" as well even though my husband and I were TTC for 5.5 years. We all have different paths but we all share similar wants, frustrations, worries, heartbreaks etc. I'm glad you are here with us!

Welcome @bfpafter4years, @MojieJoand @eahayes. I'm so glad you guys are here with us!!!

WhitRF · March 2018

New to this board - currently expecting TWINS after IVF. We had 3 retrievals and 1 failed transfer prior to this. I'm so nervous about carrying twins and hoping to get as far as possible with them.

Currently 7w3d!

herewegoagain3rd · March 2018

Just got the call from my RE. My numbers jumped from 537 to 1399 in less than 48 hours!! They scheduled my first ultrasound tomorrow. I am over the moon!

lurvleybunchococonuts · March 2018

So kind of related and honestly, I'm mostly just venting (unless one of you guys have some sort of brilliant advise)... my older sister has known we'd been struggling to get pregnant and I was diagnosed PCOS and we were doing a medicated cycle, yadda yadda yadda. My sister is also unable to have any more kids (she has a 12yo from a previous relationship) due to her last radiation treatment she had a few months ago for colon cancer. I 110% understand her hesitancy/not wanting to be involved in this pregnancy, not wanting updates, etc, but man... it sucks. We aren't super close either way, but it makes my heart sad that she doesn't want to hear anything about what's going on. As stated, I do understand. Hearing about other people getting pregnant when that's all you want yourself is hard as hell. You feel happy for them, but also so sad for yourself. I don't want to add to her heartache, but it sucks cause I want to celebrate with her at the same time. Oh well... all I can do it continue to give her space, and check in with a "hey, thinking of you" every so often and hope one day she'll be in a better place.

linz36 · March 2018

@lurvleybunchococonuts I’m sorry you’re sister can’t be more supportive. I know you say you understand but it still sucks.

herewegoagain3rd · March 2018

Had a little freak out today. I started having stabbing sharp pain on my lower left side that got worse when I walked. Since they couldn't confirm yesterday that what they were looking at was the gestational sac, they wanted to double check nothing was in my tubes.

Long story short, they couldn't find anything that should be causing my pain. They just told me to take it easy. Needlessly to say, it scared me a lot! I hate this, I wish I could just relax.

eahayes · March 2018

@bfpafter4years I hear you-- same freak out the other day! Oh the places our minds immediately go after we have been on such a long journey..

PAIF check in w/o 03/17

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