June 2018 Moms

Questions Questions Questions (Week of 3.19)

24

Re: Questions Questions Questions (Week of 3.19)

  • @marcus7676 ughghghg I could spend a weekend in Boston for cheaper (I mean, if I wanted to travel with a newborn lolz) is what you’re saying 
  • @doxiemoxie212 yes.  :-)  I think it comes down to the question - if you don't do it, will you regret it (even if it costs 2500)?  If so, and you can afford it, do it.  Regrets aren't worthwhile.
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  • @marcus7676 ughhhhh yes, I know, can't go back in time...... like, I mean, we can afford it technically speaking...........  but should we since obv then that money isn't going somewhere else..... 

    SO OKAY GUYS. guys. Can I get your brains/tastes?

    This is my favorite that I've found, and she's very expensive: https://www.emilyburkephotography.com/home

    This is DH's favorite (which @LaceyBee522 suggested! thank you!): https://www.alexadrewphotography.com/newborns 

    Do you guys see a noticeable quality difference or is it just me being crazy? I know I am unreasonably critical of photos, but I'm wondering if I probably won't be when it's my adorable squish daughter. The cost differences are dramatic. 
  • @2589 I have one like that, but I prefer my old school foam roller.

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00KAEJ3V8/ref=mp_s_a_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1521556831&sr=8-6&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=foam+roller

    I use it mostly on lower body like @LaceyBee522 said (IT bands, quads, hamstrings, calves, glutes). It hurts so good! Lately I've been rolling on my back and neck to relieve pain. I feel like the foam feels better but you do have to lay down on the ground and roll around on it (that sounds weird but there's lots of youtube videos that demo it). The handheld stick version might be better if you would feel more comfortable doing it will sitting  (or better yet, if you can convince your partner to do it for you;) )
  • not to take away from the photography discussion but do any STM's have suggestions of what to ask potential pediatricians?  Someone mentioned not knowing what to ask and I realized I'm in the same boat.  Hoping to be able to meet with one before but no idea what we should ask.  (Should have seen DH and I at our daycare interview....we're clueless haha.)
  • @doxiemoxie212 It's not just you; I instantly noticed a difference.
  • @doxiemoxie212 I do see a difference but for me that difference wouldn't be worth $2k. But it may be for you! 
    DD born 6/21/2018
    DS born 9/24/2020
  • @doxiemoxie212 my thoughts: the style of the more expensive one is very light and bright but without color or much in the background. The second one is more homey and cozy feeling. I think the main thing is that they are both in your space. So you could kind of dictate how that looks. The shots on the bed from the first one have a blank wall behind them and natural light coming in. The second one they have decor and furniture and color. 

    Honestly I like the second one better because I think they capture more of the personality of the family and their home. The first one, most of those pictures look like they could be in anyone's home or a studio. They are beautiful, and insta worthy, but they lack a certain je ne sais quoi. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @krashke that's how DH described the difference, and obv he prefers the second option too. So quality was the wrong word, it's really taste. There are definitely photos I love in the second option, but there are some photos I also hate. In the first there are photos I love, and photos I feel neutral about. But you're right that we could influence the second option more, especially since it looks like it would be in our home (I know the first one would be, but I haven't contacted the second option yet so just guessing), so it would be our decor, etc. And I could spend that $2k I save on more decor! lol lol jk
  • @taykc90 I think the biggest thing is to find out if the care they provide meets up with your expectations...I think the biggest things people want to know is if the doctors feelings on vaccinations/vaccination schedules match their own and are they prescription happy or do they favor other conservative methods and do those match you wants in a provider. You can also ask them what a typical well visit is like and what to expect there. Do they have urgent care/on call hours for questions or illnesses? I personally did a lot of online research of the different pediatricians in our area and actually found it more beneficial to talk to other moms that had kids at the practice than the doctor, because like you said if it's not an open house type meet and greet setting after about 3 minutes of one on one with few questions you have you feel kind of ridiculous not knowing what else to say. 
  • @taykc90 It just depends. You may want to make sure their protocols/procedures align with your beliefs. I made sure to ask if they were intact friendly, what the immunization schedule looked like, and asked about how things are handled after-hours. I asked if they charged for over-the-phone consultations (ex: if I had a question that was answered by a doctor, but I never spoke directly with them, etc.)    
  • @doxiemoxie212 haha spend $500 on new decor and you're still saving! It's tough because I know what I don't like when I see it and it I want to make sure when I get my photos back I don't look at them and see the things I don't like. It's easier for me to describe and pick out what I don't like than what I do. And honestly MH and I are not naturals in front of the camera. I am kind of dreading my maternity photos because I think even the most perfect ones look kind of weird. 

    I think if you just tell the photographer what you do or don't want (even show them inspiration pictures) they are happy to try to achieve that because they want you to be happy with the final product. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @katelynrae86 DH totally has a foam roller but I don’t feel coordinated enough to roll on it anymore! I feel like I’m tweaking things in my back to get in the position to roll what I need to roll  :D


    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @krashke Yeah, I also think I've imprinted on the really expensive photographer because I prefer her maternity photos to like any others I've seen in NYC (though when I was briefly looking in LA, I got so sad because photographers in LA are just so much more abundant, less expensive and take the least awkward mat photos across the board I've seen) -- NYC adult lifestyle photos can go into this weird.... I don't know how to describe it? Like early Sex & the City aesthetic? Do you know what I'm talking about? Like sort of 90s but not intentionally retro? But her photos are great. So I'm like, "Oh, maybe I wouldn't look trash in photos with her..." lolz. Meanwhile DH is like, "Well I like the second option best, but I still think my buddy could just take some photos of us with the baby with his phone." Like, sir, you are missing the point. 
  • @doxiemoxie212 bahaha! YH! It's particularly funny because our photographer is basically MH's buddy. He is basically going to hang out for a couple days and take photos when he can but mostly watch sports and drink with MH. I mean he takes good photos and has very high quality equipment but still. 

    I get what you mean with the 90's but not retro. I think you have to try to separate the subjects and surroundings from the actual quality and editing of the photos. Focus more on the lighting and composition because I think your aesthetic is going to be different then other people in the photos. 

    Also if you can find them on FB a lot of photographers post photos from each session on FB so their clients can share them, so you will get more of their work on there vs just what they've put in their portfolio which might not have been updated in awhile. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @doxiemoxie212 Mine included 20 digital photos.  

    If your decor is minimalist or modern I would definitely go with the first one for photos.  The second one has more of a family room, photo album sort of taste to it.  But I do like them as it kind of finds the medium between the lifestyle and posed type of shoots.  I love the lifestyle photos but I'm awkward in pictures and hate looking at myself lol, but I think they're beautiful.
  • @doxiemoxie212 I prefer the 2nd one, but it's just my style. Also, I love saving money so...  
  • @doxiemoxie212 I totally agree with @krashke assessment but I much prefer the first, more expensive option. I think I’d be totally fine with the second if I never saw Emily Burke’s style. I don’t know if it’s worth $2K extra though. 

    @taykc90 The biggest thing for me was just feeling comfortable with the doctor as a person. I’m a very laid back person and therefore parent, so an old school, one way is right only kinda doctor was not for us. All the questions @momac1919 are great too. 
    DD:3 | DS:1
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • @dinodna3 right? I'm having flashbacks to when everyone told me not to try on Vera Wang gowns "just for fun" for my wedding because it would spoil every dress after (but little did they know I'd already had wedding dresses ruined for me by doing the beauty PR BTS stuff for Carolina Herrerra bridal soooooo). 

    @krashke that's true - I should seek out their social media and see if I can get more photos. And the more I look at the second option, I realize that it's an entire family's photos I hate, so probably I just don't like their taste instead of the photog's. 
  • @momac1919 @diodna3 @kfren thanks ladies!

    @kfren um what is intact friendly? lol told you we're clueless.  Also I never would have thought to ask about phone consults thank you!!
  • @taykc90 Intact friendly just means they respect the decision not to circumcise. I got a lot of grief from family for making the decision not to; I didn't want to hear it from people I'm paying, too.
  • jsl82jsl82 member
    @doxiemoxie212 I could notice a difference, but like @elsie42 said I wouldn't bay $2K more for that difference.  I would suggest talking to the second photographer to see if they can send you other pictures not published in their portfolio that may be more your style.  See how willing they are to work with you around your photographic taste.

    @taykc90 like others have mentioned when I went for our initial meeting with DD's first pediatrician I asked about vaccinations/ modifications if there were any issues that arose.  I didn't want to subject my baby to any unvaccinated children (especially if they were sick), but if there had been a reaction to a round of shots I wanted to know they would work with me to ensure DD was not allergic, ect.  I mostly checked out the office to see if it seemed clean enough- how far apart the sick waiting room was from the well waiting room, if the office in general looked outdated (worn out seats, the lighting in the office (I prefer a brighter office- but it makes me feel like it's cleaner)).   I also like to have multiple doctors in the same practice (I like this for myself too- having options is key) and I would prefer an office with Saturday hours, not just after work.  DD is almost 15 months old- I want her in bed by 7:30-8pm, so leaving the doctors office at 7:15 because we were able to get in after work doesn't make any sense for me- I'd much rather be able to see a doctor on Saturday. 

    I am actually shopping around for a new pediatrician right now, because I hate the office.  I love DD's pediatrician, but DD's old practice (we moved or she would still be there) had a separate room for all of the vaccines.  They said it was to keep the kids from associating the doctor with shots, but what I loved was that it kept the appointment moving.  Being kept in a tiny doctor exam room waiting for a nurse for up to 30 minutes is torture.  Having the separate area also meant there was 1 nurse that only did vaccinations- so it helped keep the dr/nurse team on the same schedule.  I would recommend joining a local moms FB page and asking for recommendations.  
    me 35/ DH 39
    married 8/22/2015
    BFP#1- 4/2014 edd 1/1/15 mmc/d&c 6/2014
    BFP#2- 10/2015 edd- 6/29/2016 mmc/ d&c 12/2015
    BFP#3- 4/30/2016 DD1 12/27/16
    BFP#4- 9/26 edd 6/5/18

  • Interviewing a Pediatrician Questions  
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Another pediatrician questions: do you need to have a pediatrician specifically or can you see a family medicine doctor? The only clinics that are convenient location wise are family practice not specifically pediatrician. It says that they do newborn visits and well child visits. They also do OB so I could potentially go to the same Dr and knock out all of the appointments in one visit. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @krashke No. But you need to make sure that the family doctor is willing to see children under a certain age and administers vaccines, is knowledgeable about development and milestones, etc. etc. 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @krashke there’s nothing wrong with a good family practice doctor. However, being in the medical field I believe there are specialists for a reason. I’m just more comfortable with my kid seeing someone who is dedicated to knowing everything there is to know about kids. I feel a pediatrician is more likely to be keeping current with the newest recommendations and evidence based research in pediatrics, vs a family practice doc who also has to make time to keep up with adult and geriatric research and developments as well. I do know a lot of great family practitioners so I can’t say anything bad about them in general, just go with what you’re comfortable with!


    Pregnancy Ticker
  • kfren said:
    @taykc90 Intact friendly just means they respect the decision not to circumcise. I got a lot of grief from family for making the decision not to; I didn't want to hear it from people I'm paying, too.
    ugh WHY do people feel the need to comment on this?!  It's your child's genitalia how on earth is that anyone else's business?!  I mean okay doctors have to discuss it from a medical perspective but yeah ultimately it's your decision.  Well this won't be an issue for us just yet because we're having a girl but thanks for that clarification!
  • @2589 I feel the same way. Kind of like how I feel about GP's writing prescriptions for mental health issues. They may be knowledgeable but to an extent their knowledge must be dated.  
  • So I’m in Florida in Tampa Bay and we pay 179 for an in home photo shoot with around 30 digitals included. That’s from a professional studio we have used them 4 times with DD so I can’t imagine 2500! 
  • @katie121209 Girl, we are neighbors! I’m just across the bay. 
    DD:3 | DS:1
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • jsl82jsl82 member
    @krashke, @2589 & @kfren my family switched my brother and I out of the pediatricians office to the FP when we were REALLY young (I don't remember ever seeing a pediatrician).  For the most part there was no issues with the FP vs pediatrician, but because FPs don't specialize in kids they do not always have all the vaccines- when I was about to start college I was unable to get a booster for meningitis at the office.  I went somewhere else to get it, but it was an extra step that I wouldn't have had to take if we had been seen by a pediatrician.  Also, my FP has 1 waiting room- sick and well alike will sit in the same room, so you would be exposing you LOs to more germs/infections/diseases.
    me 35/ DH 39
    married 8/22/2015
    BFP#1- 4/2014 edd 1/1/15 mmc/d&c 6/2014
    BFP#2- 10/2015 edd- 6/29/2016 mmc/ d&c 12/2015
    BFP#3- 4/30/2016 DD1 12/27/16
    BFP#4- 9/26 edd 6/5/18

  • I think it probably depends on the office itself. I have an HMO and haven’t really had an issue with FP not issuing vaccines in a timely manner. (Because it was a major hospital as well.) My FP Doc is currently in the same office as several pedis, so I am not really worried about it. I switched to FP with DD because I felt like the pedi I initially selected missed things. YMMV.

    If you are on a PPO and your FP doc practices independently, then yeah, I’d probably opt for a pedi. 
  • Tell me about sizing for Pink Blush. I'm thinking of getting a wrap dress to wear to a wedding in May and also 2 more weddings in June (probably nursing a newborn.)

    I was thinking wrap style because they're flattering and nursing friendly.

    I'm a size medium/8 and very tall. I need it to be long enough to cover my bump on my 5'11" frame... I can't do above the knee maternity dresses because they fit me like shirts.

    I'm thinking a high-low style (not maxi because the hem would fall funny on me) but this could still be too short... (pic in spoiler.)



     
  • @llamamama14 I found pink blush to be very true to size. I'm 5'9 and didn't have a problem with the dress being too short over my bump. Love the one in the spoiler!
    Me 30 Him 30
    Married
     August 2015
    DS born 5/23/2018
    TTC #2 July 2020



  • Did any STM+ get a “stop traveling by X weeks” recommendation? Particularly if you were high risk? I know I had one with DD, but I can’t remember if it was at 30w or 32w. I know I couldn’t fly after a certain point.
  • llamamama14llamamama14 member
    edited March 2018
    @Amphibious22 was yours maternity or regular? Going back to look at your shower pic...

    Eta: If yours was maternity would ot work as non-maternity or are there seams/ruching that disqualify it for use as a regular dress?
  • @starla487 I'm pretty sure I'm an outlier with the twins, but my doctor didn't want me traveling after 24 weeks. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @starla487 traveling in what sense? planes? cars?  I think airlines are 34-36 weeks (and sometimes require a doctor's note).  I went to an out of state wedding 5 hours away at 37 weeks with DS and my OB/MW was cool with it.  
  • @marcus7676 Train or car travel to another major metro area about 2 hours away. I’m high risk, so I might be an exception. I haven’t met with my new OB yet. But, I have a work conference at around 31w5, and my boss keeps asking me if I’m going or not.
  • @starla487 my ob said no air travel after 35 weeks. She’s fine with any kind of travel until that point as long as I’m still low risk. She said I’d likely be extremely uncomfortable flying after 30 weeks, though. 
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