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First Time Mom Check-in February

klj0228klj0228 member
in September 2018 Moms
This is a chance for FTMs to check-in and sound off on the excitements, concerns etc of being a FTM. How are you feeling physically? How about emotionally? 
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Re: First Time Mom Check-in February

  • klj0228klj0228 member
    @SkilledSailor same with the super excited to be pregnant, but ready to be past the first trimester! I have to travel for work next week for the first time since getting pregnant and will be in very intense meetings. Praying it’s not too warm in our conference rooms and that I don’t get sick in the middle of meetings. That would definitely blow my cover. 

    We have not really started talking about childcare. My husband is going to quit working at the end of August so he will be home with me and baby in the beginning. I work from home most of the time so I want the baby to be in daycare in the afternoon and home with me in the morning at least a couple days a week. DH and his dad are starting their own business spring of 2019 so then we will need to address childcare a little more, especially when baby becomes more mobile. 
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  • jayliijaylii member
    @SkilledSailor I'm also feeling like garbage and I'm a teacher! I've been powering through teaching, but have my usual water/tea on hand as well as a snack. Really liking pretzel chips and I can pop one into my mouth if needed. I don't recommend trying to suck on a hard candy. You really can't talk without worrying that you're going to spit it across the room. Another challenge for me with teaching is that I feel really out of breath talking and projecting my voice that much. Wonder if my students have noticed. They must think I'm really out of shape, haha Good luck with your talk!
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  • klj0228klj0228 member
    @lccharles welcome to the group! Glad you are participating! My parents live half way across the country so I ordered a little onesie on Etsy that says we don’t know yet if it’s a he or she all we know is you are nana and poppa to be. I shipped it this week because my mom’s birthday is Friday. I told my mom she can’t open it until my dad gets home so he can FaceTime me when they open it. Someone else on here called some local floral shops for where their family is located. She is sending them copies of the sonogram and they are going to deliver flowers and the cards will include her sonogram. 
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  • runninginvarunninginva member
    Feeling so nauseous and tired. Right along with you ladies... Ready to be out of the first trimester! @lccharles, I have the same due date as you, at least according to the bump. Also waiting to go to the doctors to confirm that. 

    I told my parents last weekend. My husband and I traveled to see them last weekend and gave them a "grandparent starter kit," which they were super excited about, especially my mom.

    I'm mostly worried about a loss. I had a CP in June, and that has kept me from getting as excited as I was when I got pregnant the first time around. My mom was ready to go shopping for the baby last weekend and I told her I just couldn't bear to have baby things around if we lose this baby. I know that's depressing, but it's just my reality right now.

    I have a feeling that I will be super excited when we get our first ultrasound. I've wanted to be a mom for a long time!
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  • lccharleslccharles member
    I love both of those ideas. I didn't think of either of them we were going to make a nice card but I like that idea better! Thank you. 
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  • ashh2018ashh2018 member
    @lccharles I’m across the country from family too! DH and I moved way out here right after we got married in fall 2016. We told our families after our 8 wk appt. I sent them little gifts and instructed them not to open them until we were on FaceTime! 

    I’m honestly getting anxious about everything haha, but primarily money. I don’t have many friends out here so I don’t imagine I’ll have a baby shower. We are blessed to have some generous family members who are super excited about their first grandchild, and they’ve already said they plan to gift us many things that we’ll need. I don’t even know where to start. I still feel like it’s too early to plan or buy. I’m not the least bit religious, but my ancestors are Jewish - my mom said the Jewish tradition is to not do/buy/prepare anything in advance. I’m pretty type-a so I’m not sure how that will work lol. 
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  • srachilaganisrachilagani member
    ashh2018 said:
    Oh, and re how I’m feeling physically? 
    This made me laugh! I feel so gross and greasy. I am most certainly not glowing when i feel like barfing 24/7. Today i didnt leave the house until i fought the stinky onion monster in my kitchen (i only use the kitchen back door). That was exhausting. I cant wait to have a bump and glow.
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  • ropemakerropemaker member
    @lccharles our family is spread out all over the country. We're actually in the middle...sorta. Everyone can get to us with one plane ride! I just made cards that I'm sending to the florist will attach to the flowers that are delivered. They'll probably think they are late Valentine's day flowers. I haven't figure out what to do for the siblings. I might just send them a text. 

    @starswilldiex2829 congrats, firstly! Twins! How exciting :-) I was born with a cleft lip and palate and my mother was on zero meds. Lucky fluke for me. Of course everyone is different but for me it was mostly cosmetic fixes and a bunch of speech therapy. If you have questions about my experience, I'm happy to answer them. 

    @ashh2018 I'm Jewish and I haven't heard that before. So interesting! My family is a bunch of preparers from eastern Europe. I wasn't allowing myself to prepare anything until I saw the ultra sound that all was good. Now I that the babies r us is closing near us, I may have some weekly shopping trips in the future! 
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  • mpetty60mpetty60 member
    I am really so happy to be pregnant. My husband and I were trying for over a year so I am just over the moon! We have told our whole family already and everyone is super excited and its just been very sweet. I am feeling very nauseous and so tired for weeks so I am ready for that to be over for sure! Our first appointment is Monday but I have already been having some issues with my drs office. I had called in worrying about cramping at about 6 weeks and the nurse told me over the phone it sounded like I was having a MC. Well I didn't and I just thought it was kinda off that she said that over the phone with no evidence other than cramping (which she consistently called contractions) . I told her it didn't feel like what I think contractions would be like. Also they tried to cancel this Mondays appt 2 days ago because they said the accidently had me scheduled too early ( I'm 9 weeks and 1 day). I told them my husband and I have arranged to have work off and we would lose out on hundreds of dollars if we had to reschedule so they kept us on but said they might not be able to hear a heart beat. Anyways it has been strange so I might have to switch Drs but I am not totally sure yet. Excited to see the little one on the screen tomorrow! 
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  • klj0228klj0228 member
    @mpetty60 sorry you are having problems with your Dr already. Many of us have already heard a heartbeatuch earlier than 9 weeks so I can’t imagine that would be a problem tomorrow. You definitely should like your Dr and their staff through this process since you see them so much and spend so much time with them. You have to fully trust that they know what they are talking about and giving you the best information. 
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    @mpetty60. Congratulations!  That is really horrible and weird that your nurse would say that to you over the phone.  Mine always told me some cramping is a totally normal sensation as the uterus expands and stretches to accommodate baby.  Not to be concerned unless they are very strong / painful cramps and/or accompanied by bright red full flow.  I mean, c'mon.  There's a huge difference.  I agree, maybe after this next appointment, could be worth scheduling your followup somewhere else, but it depends.  I have been places where the doctor is phenomenal, just surrounded by a staff full of idiots.  Not saying it's a good way to be, but you could always see how you feel after meeting the doctor, and I would voice those concerns when you see him/her.

    We heard the HB very early with tv us, but the midwife said the same thing to me regarding the <i>doppler</i>, it might be too early to hear it at 9+2, but we did. :)  GL!!!
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  • mpetty60mpetty60 member
    @klj0228 thanks for the reply! I was thinking the same thing about it prob not being too early but I wonder if they r only going to do a Doppler and not an ultrasound. I super hope I get and US tomorrow. That would make me so happy! If they don't offer do you think its rude or pushy to ask for one?
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  • mpetty60mpetty60 member
    @BusinessWife thanks so much for your rely. I was thinking that too about the doctor being great but just the staff us odd. I have seen the dr now for years as my gyn and she has been great. Plus she has amazing reviews as an OB so that is comforting. But still if her staff is the ones answering the phone and is my first line of contact that that is unsettling. Did your dr just offer the ultrasound or did you have to ask for it? I think that they might not offer it tomorrow and I really want one so Idk how to ask for it without sounding pushy. What do you think?
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    @mpetty60. So my situation was a little different bc I was in treatment at the RE still early on.  They have tv us machines in every exam room, and that is the standard part of every visit - you are there to get scanned.

    You can definitely ask at the ob, however at mine it woukdnt have been possible bc they schedule the us ahead of time with the hospital.  So if youre not scheduled for a us, they couldn't just do it anyway.  But it's definitely worth asking!  Your office may not have that kind of scheduling limitation.
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  • mpetty60mpetty60 member
    @BusinessWife oh that's good to know. Finger crossed they will do one then!
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  • melly0001melly0001 member
    @jaylii I was glad to see your post here, as I am also a teacher and have been so out of breath while talking to the class! I did not realize that would be a symptom at this point, so it really caught me off guard. I am 7 weeks and have had consistent nausea - I am really worried that I am going to have to run out of class at some point long before I am ready for my students to know I'm pregnant (I teach college, so they are old enough to get suspicious if I have to run out).
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  • lccharleslccharles member
    HAHAHAHAH. 
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  • lccharleslccharles member
    I clearly don't know how this works. I was trying to comment on th monkey photo. My bad!! Xoxo ladies 
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  • jayliijaylii member
    @melly001 Hi! I teach adults as well so I know what you mean about them not getting suspicious. Fortunately, there's a restroom right outside my classroom, but it would be hard to explain. "I'm not feeling well, but don't worry, I'm not contagious!" 
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  • SkilledSailorSkilledSailor member
    TW* sexual abuse in spoiler* But it's advice my midwife gave me so if you unfortunately have experienced this, you may want to read on. 

    I have a history of sexual abuse. My midwife told me that sometimes those emotions come up during child birth. I had never heard of that before so I wanted to pass that information along. She said to just be mentally prepared for that and to maybe speak with someone about it ahead of time to come up with coping mechanisms. She believes it has to do with the loss of control over your body, nether regions, and exposure during labor.

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    @SkilledSailor. Omg it's so timely you say this.

    ***TW***  brief mention assault, medical nightmare
    <div class=" Spoiler">I have a history of being assaulted, and last night I woke up with a nightmare.  I was in a doctor's office / exam room, and someone walked in and told me to grt undressed.  And I was like uh, nah, I'm good.  Then all these doctors all came in, telling me to get undressed, and I was all, "F*$% you, F*&@ you, F&*# you, AND your mother!!!"  And I couldn't fall asleep again after that.  Weird.</div>
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  • SkilledSailorSkilledSailor member
    @businesswife Oh no!! What an awful dream!
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    <blockquote class="Quote">
    <div class="QuoteAuthor"><a href="/profile/SkilledSailor">SkilledSailor</a> said:</div>
    <div class="QuoteText">@businesswife Oh no!! What an awful dream!</div>
    </blockquote>
    Right?  And I never put 2+2 together till you just said that.  Like I told DH, ya think I'm pretty much OVER IT with all these doctors and treatment?  And he's like yah, I don't blame you.  But that really takes it to another level! :#
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  • melly0001melly0001 member
    @jaylii Same here - I actually scoped it out to make sure, since I usually use a staff bathroom, and I verified that it is a women's room. It's there if I need it, but I'm really hoping I won't! You can always say you have food poisoning or something, but that excuse only works once...
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  • ashh2018ashh2018 member
    @BusinessWife what an awful dream, I’m sorry!

    @SkilledSailor Thank you for bringing this up. TW: i used to get severe anxiety attacks when I had to go to the gyno. I finally found a NP who was very understanding and explained this same thing to me, that it was due to my history. She’s no longer with the practice due to medical leave and I sort of dread going back now :( 

    im sorry - I need to figure out how the spoiler thing works. 
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  • cooksieta1cooksieta1 member
    I’ve been feeling pretty good! Nausea and food adversions come and go, but DH is so good to me
    and let’s me almost always pick our meals. Still struggling to poo but we bought a sqatty potty and it’s changed me for the better! I have been getting bouts of lightheadedness and faintness but it usually doesn’t last long. Today we are 8w 4d and baby seems to be doing well! 

    Still loving being able to have this community. I always look forward to secretly opening my app to see how everyone is doing! We haven’t told many people yet! Waiting for MIL and FIL to visit since they live out of the country. They will be here when I’m shy of 12 weeks.  
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  • smsaulinosmsaulino member
    I'm feeling pretty good now... just exhausted. DH has mentioned that when I feel tired and am able to take a nap, he can tell I'm much happier. I know some of y'all don't get on social media much, but I'm super excited to announce first thing Wednesday morning on FB and Insta.. 11 weeks sure has flown by. 
    Me: 33 DH: 31 Baby: 9/2/2018 BabyFruit Ticker


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  • SkilledSailorSkilledSailor member
    @businesswife Right? At first I though she was just talking about the pelvic exam, so I was like..I've had a lot of exams since then. But then she explained a bit more. I was appreciative of the heads up. 

    @ashh2018 Oh no! Hopefully the entire culture of the practice is similar to the OB you had before. It definitely helps to have a provider who is sensitive to our emotional needs as well as our physical. 

    @smsaulino @cooksieta1 Yay for announcing soon! So fun! 
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  • klj0228klj0228 member
    @smsaulino and @cooksieta1 yay for getting to announce soon! I am sure the whole experience gets more real after telling the world. 
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  • mamabearallimamabearalli member
    Hello! I’m a 26 y/o FTM with my first pregnancy. My husband and I have been married for just over 2 years. We found out I’m pregnant on our anniversary in January, actually! We are both extremely excited. I’ve been having a lot of “symptoms” even since 4-5 weeks, which made me wonder if I was pregnant even before taking the test after being a few days late. Our first appointment is tomorrow, and the lady on the phone (not sure if a nurse or receptionist) told me to expect to have an ultrasound, Pap smear/pelvic exam, and probably blood work done. I’m so excited and nervous. We estimate that by tomorrow, I will be 8 w 4 days. What are some really important questions y’all have asked at your first appointments?
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