June 2018 Moms

weekly randoms 1/29

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Re: weekly randoms 1/29

  • With my 1st DH didn't want to be driving around with the seat in the car.  He thought It was weird with us not having a kid (nbd really...but w/e).  He installed it when he went home from the hospital to take care of the dogs before I was released. 

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  • @krashke, thanks for putting that list together. I'm officially behind schedule!  :D
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  • I'm still waffling on if I want to get the Doona carseat/stroller combo or wait entirely on the carseat (assuming we're still in NYC) until we're in convertible carseat land. Hospitals here don't require a carseat (unless you're going home in a personal vehicle, which almost no one is; cabs, etc., don't require them, and the hospitals don't want them in the room at all from what they said on our tour, so they don't check, etc., if you're even using one), and we don't use cars really at all, ever. Even cabs are rare. And babies outgrow infant carseats pretty quickly right? IDK. Sigh... 
  • @doxiemoxie212 if you're getting the Vista could you just have YH go get the stroller and bassinet before your discharged to take babe home in?

    The Doona seems like a good concept but I don't like how low the actual seat is to the ground. I imagine that in a crowded store/sidewalk it could be bumped with baskets and bags. Not to mention being tall I doubt the handle bar would come up high enough to be comfortable for me and especially for MH. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @krashke totally. We live literally 2 blocks away; honestly he can just carry her home in his arms even lol. I thought the Doona was the perfect solution before I found out we didn't actually need to have a carseat since we're not bringing her home in a car. It felt like less of a waste since if we ever had to take a cab somewhere (I know it's not required, but I think I'd still feel more comfortable) we could use the Doona as our stroller for the day, etc., but now that I know we don't need it at the beginning, it just seems dumber and dumber to get. Like even going to the airport, often the train is faster, soooo... and you can rent car seats right? Like at rental car places? Not everyone brings their carseats with them everywhere via plane?
  • @doxiemoxie212 - We rented a car seat for DS1 when we flew to New Orleans.  It was a brand we weren't familiar with and we had to install it in the rental car, but yes, you can rent them.

     Daisypath Anniversary tickers


    First Son - born 2013
    Second Son - born 2014 - Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS) and Double Outlet Right Ventricle (DORV).  First open heart surgery at 5 days old.  He's had 3 open heart surgeries and several other procedures and is currently doing amazing.
    Third Son - due June 9, 2018
  • @doxiemoxie212 - regarding how long babies use their infant seats...like just about everything else it is totally based on the kid...Based on the weight/height limits some kids are close to 1 and still using them (although I CANNOT imagine lugging that around)...DD1 HATED hers and we switched to convertible at like 3.5 months or something and it was a game changer.  If I didn't already have an infant seat I would skip it all together and go right for the convertible seat and baby wear if I needed her "contained" while out and about. 

    My friend's little girl is a peanut and she didn't baby wear and used her infant seat until she was 1...maybe even a little longer (just left it in the car, didn't carry it) so everyone is different. 

  • ok so as a FTM I'm not hip to all the things that are cool in the kid scene but I'm on a parent BST FB group and I kept seeing posts for Mini Boden stuff. So I looked them up because even used these prices were ridiculous. Why is this ish so expensive! I mean some of it is freaking cute but why would you spend $60 on something your kid will outgrow in 3 months?

    Example:


    I'm also cheap though and I don't spend much on clothing for myself either. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • doxiemoxie212doxiemoxie212 member
    edited February 2018
    @krashke I used to do PR for Boden when I first started!!! We had so much teeny tiny baby stuff in the product closet, and it was soooo cute. Def expensive (well made, though), but maybe put a few items on your babylist registry or something? In case someone wants to splurge on super adorable baby stuff. (ETA: just re-read your post and I misunderstood. I thought you were lamenting how cute it was and you wanted it but didn't want to spend that much money, but I think instead you were just talking about how absurd their prices are, in which case I agree lol, though TBH I probably would buy an outfit for someone else's kid - IDK why I'm like this! lol)
  • krashke I think it is bananas.  Not only will they outgrow it super fast but it will get puke, poop, and milk stains on it...so not worth it.  All about basic onesies and leggings...that is all you need.  I can't tell you how many "cute/fancy" outfits I had for DD1 both splures as a FTM and gifts that were NEVER used...maybe i'll get a chance to use them with DD2  but doubtful...

    On a similar topic...the Slumberkin trend...wtf...$50ish for a lovie/stuffed animal that looks like roadkill/doesn't have stuffing or any content that would justify a crazy price...and people are spending $200 on "rare" ones on bst pages??  HUH?!?! 

  • @kmurdock925 my mind just went, "slumberkin? is that like slenderman?" lolz but then I googled and ...............FFTC? Those are cute AF. I'm terrible. 
  • @doxiemoxie212- I would totally think they were cute if it weren't for the price tag...especially since I buy multiples of lovies in case- God forbid- one gets lost or is in the wash, gets puked/peed/pooped on, etc...

    FFTC- help me out on that one...I'm sure as soon as you say what it is I'll be like, duuh

    I get our lovies here... https://www.marymeyer.com/ ...and they're fantastic and have held up so well!  I keep one on the crib/nursery and one in the diaper bag at all times.  Specifically DD1 has this one...well, 7 of them, just in case...hahahah https://www.marymeyer.com/product/afrique-elephant-character-blanket-13x13/

  • @kmurdock925 flame free thursday confessional (instead of friday)
  • Nope. I can't spend that kind of money on kids' clothes. Count me in for thrifting, coupons, and hand me downs. They go through stuff so quickly, blow it out of their diapers up their backs, barf on them, etc. It's just not worth it, yo. 
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  • doxiemoxie212  DUH!! haha- I was looking at it thinking fffc but couldn't put 2 & 2 together, ha.  yikes.
  • Both my kids stayed in their infant seats until 1 and even then they weren’t at the limits of the seat. They are both skinny minnies. 

    I guess its just personal preference but I don’t like using pre-loved or rented baby gear. I’d rather buy a car seat and store it when not using then rent one I know nothing about. 

    Im not at mini Boden price point but I buy DD boutique dresses. Mainly from Eleanor Rose and Olive Mae. I do get most of Facebook buy/sell/trade groups, so they are slightly cheaper used $25/30. 
    DD:3 | DS:1
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  • I've dabbled in the boutique clothes for DD, mostly Matilda Jane, but I also use a FB resale site and DH's cousin has a daughter who is a few sizes ahead of DD so I've bought some second hand from her. They're adorable and since she isn't growing *super* fast right now, we've been able to get some longer wear out of them.
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  • @harveyabbey77 I heart MJ, but I only GLT. 
  • DS was out of the infant seat before 1 year not because of exceeding weight restrictions, but height. In fact, most 1 year olds aren't 30 lbs yet, which is what a lot of infant carriers go to, but they can definitely exceed 30 in. Just familiarize yourself with the height restrictions for those because we realized kind of suddenly he was rapidly outgrowing his and had to scramble to budget in a whole new carseat when we weren't expecting it. We bought the Graco 4Ever and and are pretty big fans of it. You can actually put a 4lb newborn in those which is kind of cool, and will last us until he grows out of it because converts and goes to 100lbs. 
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  • Here's a chart I found on height restrictions for many carseats: https://babies411.com/information-station/car-seat/heightweight-limits-of-infant-only-car-seats-new.html 

    Looks like the avg max height for infant carseats is around 29/30 inches with a few exceptions, as @austenista said.

    Obviously I have no idea how our kids will grow, but I certainly would have outgrown that before I was 1, and waaaay before the weight restrictions. Hmmm
  • DD used her infant seat until after she was one, maybe 14 months? DS only used it until 6 months because he had bad acid reflux that made him spit up every time I put him in his infant carrier. Thank goodness I didn't buy a new seat for him- just reused our first. This baby isn't even getting an infant carrier, because I don't want to buy a new one and I have a convertible seat that has low weight limit of like 5lbs. 
  • @May14th2011 we went through a similar situation last fall like "WhereTF is all of our money going" so we exported our purchases from our bank account for like 6 months into an excel spread sheet ( :#) and then categorized every single dollar that went out. The bank will do some of that for you but we got down to the nitty gritty. We found that we could save about $500 a month by limiting going out to once a week and not going out for drinks (easy for me to eliminate). 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @May14th2011 if you're interested, Mint.com is free and associated with Intuit (so, its not sketchy), and it will tell you historically where every single dollar of yours has gone, and I've found it immensely helpful. 
  • @doxiemoxie212 I used Mint (the app) for awhile back in the day but I stopped because I was sick of the "your balance on _____ account is low" notifications. Granted this was right after college when $200 in my checking account was not low lol. 
    *TW LC*
    Me & MH: 32
    DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
    TTC #2: 12/2019
    Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
    Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
    Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18

  • @krashke lol lol I like the notifications because the ones I get now are mostly, "large expense on X account" which usually means DH purchased some obscene comic-related item, and I can yell at him immediately. You can also customize the emails so they don't happen except under certain circumstances. Also I got Mint after we got married, and I added all our bank accounts and credit cards, including ones we rarely use thus hadn't added each other to. And guess what? DH had this random credit card with a $75 balance on it that he'd completely forgotten about and hadn't paid even minimum payments on it in ages, so I'm glad I figured out he's a money moron early so we could fix that.... sigh.  :|
  • @doxiemoxie212 I love mint. I turned off all email notifications though because they notified me all the time about everything. Drove me nuts. 
  • @May14th2011 H and I do a zero based budget after having several of those “OMG, why are we so broke” moments. I have a spreadsheet built that has a tab for each month and within each month we plan out what bills come out of each paycheck we receive for that month. Anything extra we’ve been throwing at debt and savings. We’re basically doing a slower paced Dave Ramsey snowball because we’re saving for baby too. This has helped our finances and arguments about money so much.

    Although I handle most of the bill paying and updating the budget sheet, DH is now in the habit of checking it often so it’s not always on me to say “no, we can’t do that because it wasn’t budgeted” all the time.
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  • llamamama14llamamama14 member
    edited February 2018
    @may14th2011 I am anal and I record  and categorize each purchase I make in a Google Drive Sheet. It's been a habit for years since my first job when I had a tight budget.  I like to keep a strict budget and save for purchases that are important to me. 

    DH does not like to keep a strict budget. He feels like if he's paying off his credit cards each month, paying the bills,  and paying into savings/investments he's good. We have a joint Mint account but over 20% of the transactions are miscategorized so unless you sort through it and correct everything you don't have an accurate picture of your spending. Even when I've combed through and corrected everything it hasn't displayed our monthly spending accurately. I think there's an old dead account glitching things up. 





  • @harveyabbey77 I handle basically all of the finances and have started making an effort to show DH our account more often. I think it helps him to see how well/not well we're doing and then it's not me being the bad guy, it's actual facts.
    I did allot him $100/month for whatever he wants, since he's fixing up a project car. I know he gets frustrated at not having money to use for it. 
  • I've heard good things about using "You Need a Budget" too. I signed up but haven't startes uaing it. I tried Mint but it was hard for me to use. MH manages all our joint bills and we keep separate personal accounts with a joint checking and joint savings we both transfer into. Works for us.

    Random from last night. Minding my own business and MH comes along side me and says "impressive" and nods to my post-dinner, bloated, half food baby - half baby belly. He then lifted his shirt to compare lol. He thinks he's putting on sympathy weight but he looks the same to me.
  • @May14th2011 That was always the root of my frustration since I handle most of the bills and budget. DH wouldn't even participate with the budget and I was always the b*tchy wife who had to say no to everything. We too budget in discretionary/fun money for each of us from every check so it doesn't feel like we're totally deprived or can't do anything!
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  • @doxiemoxie212 that's so fun! I want to get to CA one day really bad. I've never been out west anywhere. I feel like it'll be like a different world from here.

    on the budget talks. guys, I suck. And I'm embarrassed. I don't budget for us. I get our bills paid. i know our savings is growing. so I'm happy. i should put more effort into it all so i could atleast say 'oh we're saving atleast XX amount this month'. especially cause i want our savings to keep stacking up for a larger downpayment for when we sell/buy the house. maybe that'll be my goal after baby.



    me:35 DH:34
    DS: born oct 2012
    TFAS: BFP #1 aug16. miscarriage sept16
              BFP #2 nov16 MMC dec16. d&c jan17
              BFP #3 sept17  EDD 5/31/18
    fingers crossed for our rainbow baby
  •  I am +1 mint.com! We have used it for goal setting and savings, cash flow management. Most importantly, It is a quick understandable visual snap shot I can show my DH. (He has a low tolerance for finance talk) I have saved us $$ by comparing monthly bills, so when the cable or cell jacks up their contracts I can track it, and complain.
      
    I have been using it for years, with separate accounts for DH and I and a joint account. All in one place! Love it. 

    AFM, DH, DD and I are going to Great Wolf Lodge for 3 nights as our babymoon!!! 
    Mama to a wonderful DD - Sep 2015, Wife to my DH since 2011, 2 dogs, a cat, and hoping to add No. 2 in May/June 2018. Canadian.
    5 - IUIs, 3 - IVF retrievals, 2- failed transfers (fresh, and frozen), PGS on second IVF resulted in 1 perfect emby, and DD. 
    3rd IVF w PGS resulted in 3! perfect embys. 1st transfer - Sep 2017 2 more on ice. 
  • Our babymoon was supposed to be San Francisco but DH has to go back to his home state to fix his drivers license so I guess that will be our trip. Not nearly as much fun but that's okay. San Francisco will still be there after baby comes
  • @May14th2011 go to SF after baby, and tack on Napa ;) 
  • It took me a while to read through all these- and TB is still acting up- but I think my wifi at work is also to blame.

    Car Seats- @doxiemoxie212 you might want to check out the 4moms car seat- it is suppose to basically self install in the car, which would be best if you are constantly switching cars (car shares, taxis, traveling, ect).  I haven't used it, so I can't give a real reco, but seems like a product that would be best for your situation.  Also, congrats on the freelance job!! I was thinking about you this week, but between the glitchy site and a new client added to my workload I have been pretty mia this week.

    @krashke amazing spreadsheet- I wish I was that organized.  I would move a few things up though.  The 2nd trimester is the best trimester for being active.  Most energy and you are more and more uncomfortable in 3rd.  So nursery and baby clothes should be mostly done by 28 weeks. 

    Have a great weekend ladies- hoping to get a bunch of baby stuff out of storage this weekend, so I should be active and offline most of the weekend!!  
    me 35/ DH 39
    married 8/22/2015
    BFP#1- 4/2014 edd 1/1/15 mmc/d&c 6/2014
    BFP#2- 10/2015 edd- 6/29/2016 mmc/ d&c 12/2015
    BFP#3- 4/30/2016 DD1 12/27/16
    BFP#4- 9/26 edd 6/5/18

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