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July 2018 Moms
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Monday B*tchfest 1/22

brittany121087brittany121087 member
in July 2018 Moms
Why is the first thing people ask when they find out your pregnant is "was it planned?" Wtf! Does it freaking matter! Let's try congratulations. When's your due date? How are you feeling? All appropriate questions. Whether I took my temp every day or had one to many to drink one night. None of your business and beside the point now. Geez.
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Re: Monday B*tchfest 1/22

  • noideawhatshesdoingnoideawhatshesdoing member
    @brittany121087 Exactly! Agree, super annoying. I also got the "I thought you weren't going to have kids". Well, we weren't, but that didn't mean we hated kids! And nature had other plans for us, so now we're just changing course and adding another adventurer to our pack!
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  • wildtotwildtot member
    @brittany121087 just reply back with an even more awkward response or question lol jk yeah it’s totally weird to be asked that especially from a boss. In my case i use to say one and done but things got better over time. I like to twist my responses to focus my fertility challenges and why we as women should be supported instead of questioned or put down. I try to make it educational because half the time they don’t think before they speak or are aware of sensitive topics. 

    My BF- on the day im in downtown looking forward to a churro from the shrimp stand nearby and it’s closed! Also, i hate tax season!
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  • stillcozystillcozy member
    edited January 2018
    Why does it have to snowstorm I run out of lotion and my legs and feet crave all the moisture?! booo go away so mama can go to the mecca of bath and body works!
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


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  • stillcozystillcozy member
    also people are nosy jerks. sorry so many of you have had to deal with rude comments! 
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


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  • TalesOfASocialIntrovertTalesOfASocialIntrovert member
    edited January 2018
    God yes!!!! Pregnancy seems to dissolve the dumb comment filter!! Our DD and this LO will be 1 year apart or less and only 2 people of the numerous friends, family, and coworkers we told gave congratulations without also expressing extreme surprise, followed by asking if it was planned. Which feels like they were asking if we really wanted this child. Hmmmm YESSSS!!!  :|

    **poss TW**
    After I put in 2 months notice at work, my boss asked if I had a MC if I would still want my job..... **TW** People are fucking stupid and offensive and don't understand their comments are shitty.

    Edited to add that I left that job 2 weeks later.
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  • hillbillywifehillbillywife member
    @4deep I feel like any talk about “what you’re having” is awkward. Everyone has an opinion on what’s “best” and no one every says it tactfully or with the emotional of the people actually carrying the child in mind.

    My pregnant friends are both having girls and they are singing the praises of all things girl and how wonderful they are. I’m worried that I’m going to be disappointed if its a boy just because of their gloating for so long. And that’s stupid because I really wouldn’t be disappointed with a boy. 

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  • wildtotwildtot member
    @TalesOfASocialIntrovert wow that’s the worst I’ve heard! What and idiot boss and sorry you had to endure that!
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  • stillcozystillcozy member
    ugh people need a new filter! 
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


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  • brittany121087brittany121087 member
    @wildtot I know the feeling. I went to chick fil a craving a chicken salad sandwich only to be reminded they discontinued them. I might have cried. 

    @lindsayleigh1989 I've been so dry and itchy this time around. I could take a bath in lotion. Lucky I don't run out much because I might have a slight addiction to bath and body works and am ashamed to say how much I have.

    @hillbillywife i kind of understand how you feel. Everyone wants this to be a boy because my oldest is a girl. I honestly don't care either way, but I am a little afraid to have a boy. I feel like I don't know what to do with them and will not dote on them as much. My daughter is real girly and it just comes naturally. I know it will be fine when he got here, just an irrational pregnancy fear.
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  • bearrosebudbutterflyrainbowbearrosebudbutterflyrainbow member
    I have been getting the most strange, horrific stories shared with me at work.  **TW: "Someone I knew got the flu while pregnant and died, so be careful of the flu," and "A friend I know found out all these issues with the baby at ___ weeks along." **TW 

    Why are you sharing these stories with me?! I'm already an anxious person by nature and add these new hormones...insensitivityyyyyyy!
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  • samjjorgensensamjjorgensen member
    I have one coworker who for LITERALLY YEARS always makes comments like “oh you just HAVE to have kids” “Sam it’s so great you NEED a baby!” We didn’t have fertility issues, but a few months ago (when I was unknowingly pregnant) I finally said back “You need to think before you say things like that. What if we’ve been trying and can’t? You don’t know what anyone else is going through.”

    When she found out I was pregnant? Her first comment after congratulations was “I knew you were when you made that rude comment to me.” People are just clueless and rude.
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  • acunamatadaacunamatada member
    @samjjorgensen and she thought YOUR comment was rude?? People. 

    I like to make people uncomfortable and make a comment about our loss last spring when people ask if we were trying. I know most mean well, but some people just don’t think sometimes. 

    My mom asked me this weekend if I was taking my prenatals and if I’ve gained any weight. What??
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  • samjjorgensensamjjorgensen member
    @acunamatada oh no. Weight gain is like my #1 eff off question, even from my Mama. Mind. Yo. Business!
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  • wildtotwildtot member
    @samjjorgensen i would be furious from those comments! *TW* within a month of my MC which happened during mother’s day, i was at a friends house for a bbq. I was the only one without children there and someone who didn’t know me or what i was going through asked if i planned on having any and i replied yes eventually. She proceeded to tell me how i should wait and how much work they were blah blah blah. My surroundings friends who knew of my MC gave me the biggest “I’m sorry” face before i ran off to cry in the restroom. We left the gathering soon after *End TW*

    some people just suck 
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  • KellyFM522KellyFM522 member
    My heart goes out to you ladies for getting such stupid comments thrown at you. Which is just another reason I don’t want to tell people. Haha.

    why I’m super witchy today. 

    I had a sick 5 year old last week Saturday to Wednesday. My husband was sick Friday to today. They both had fevers. Maybe the flu not sure. But what does my daughter do at 6:45 in the morning? Puke all over me. I don’t want to play nursemaid anymore. I’m exhausted from taking care of everyone. I have also been sleeping on the couch since DH has been been quarantined to our room. And my back just wants my tempurpedic bed. 

    Duke Winter 10/11/12
    Baby Duex 05/20/15

    NYC Momma 

    "My stroller is my SUV"
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  • wildtotwildtot member
    @samjjorgensen ahaha  thank you for that wonderful comment! I agree 100%
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  • stillcozystillcozy member
    @brittany121087 same! my stash has finally run out. I am excited to try their face masks soon! Do you have a favorite product?

    @samjjorgensen that is awful and she sounds like a horrendous human being! 
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


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  • brittany121087brittany121087 member
    @lindsayleigh1989 I love there aromatherapy line. Picking a favorite product is like picking a favorite child. I haven't tried the facemask yet because I break out easy. Let me know how they are.
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  • stillcozystillcozy member
    @brittany121087 the aromatherapy line is amazing! it is what got me interested in aromatherapy in the first place. I will let you know for sure how the masks are! 
    April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing


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  • LadyJ2949LadyJ2949 member
    @4deep I was just coming here to say the same thing!! I just found out we are having a girl (this makes three) and already we are getting the comments. It’s so freaking rude. Why can’t people just stick to congratulations and leave it at that?

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  • morethanamamamorethanamama member
    d_marie_23 said:
    Wow. Just wow. I really wish I could punch all these people in the face who've said these nasty comments to you guys. People. Suck. It's official, we need less people and more netflix. 
    This is how I feel too! The comments...again, it's like we are having kids to meet some kind of perfect equation (boy+girl, no other "combinations" accepted!). Kids are kids. We love them regardless if we have 3 boys or 4 girls or whatever. 

    I also got a really random comment this weekend. I attended my friend's sister in law's baby shower. She is expecting twins. My friend traveled from Florida to be here. She invited her half sister to the shower too (like, why? But whatever) who I had met a few months ago. This girl likes to make people uncomfortable. She always comes up with the most random comments. Everyone at this shower was saying how I wasn't showing yet and they couldn't tell I was pregnant (I'm always very careful about making those comments too, but whatever, I didn't mind as much). Then here comes my friend's sister..."I'm sorry to tell you but you're gonna get biiiiiig". I wan like...ok, based on what psychic ability are you saying this? 

    I shook it off and said "well, I'm growing a human, I'm trying to stay healthy and that's more important than how much weight I put on". Did I mention she is severely overweight... anyways...when I said goodbye after the shower she had the guts to say " can't wait for your baby shower, let me know when it is". Really??? I really hope my friend doesn't bring up inviting her because I'm definitely going to veto!
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  • gingerbride26gingerbride26 member
    Oh man - getting flashbacks from when i was pregnant with DD - and remembering why we haven't announced yet.  I got the "are you sure you're pregnant?" with DD all the time because i never really popped, this time I pulled out the maternity clothes by 9 weeks and keep staring down people daring them to say something.

    @KellyFM522 same here! but they started with the puking and my DD is 2.  I'm the only one who never fully got it - 3 days of horrible indigestion but nothing violent.  BE STRONG.

    My BF is about my MIL.  She drives me freaking nuts (so not looking forward for her to know i'm pregnant).  We went out to hibachi on Saturday and couldn't understand why my FIL, husband, and I were all telling her to back off when my kid wanted to watch "the fishy movie" and we told her she had to wait until we got home but MIL kept trying to get us to find it on someone's phone.  She literally had to leave the table because she "couldn't handle" (her words) the toddler crying for 3 min.... 
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  • michelle_birdmichelle_bird member
    I have a church friend with 4 boys.  I told her Sunday that we were pregnant and mentioned to her that her oldest was telling me how badly he wanted a baby sister.  She told me that he bawled with their 3rd when he found out it was a boy. With the 4th they found out the gender ahead of time just to help him - by that point she was glad it was another boy because she didn't want to "mess" with the house dynamic!  He was so sweet when he told me - "I really wanted a baby sister but Ian and Max screwed it up".  
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  • hayhay93hayhay93 member
    Your MIL sounds a lot like my Grandma. She hates it when kids cry. She used to humiliate me growing up because she would give awful looks to people with crying children. She even goes up to people to tell them off about bad parenting/abuse. One woman followed her into a store after she told her off and reminded her that you don’t always know what someone is going through that day. Kids cry. Some people just can’t handle it. I hope your MIL doesn’t act crazy when she finds out you’re pregnant again! @gingerbride26
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  • gingerbride26gingerbride26 member
    @hayhay93 oh man that is way worse! Good for that woman to push back!  MIL doesn't really care about other people's kids, it's just the blessed grandchild (whom she has called her baby since day 1 and told people *she* was having a baby girl while I was pregnant...weird...my May 2016 mom board got some doozie stories from my that pregnancy including pushing me out of the way at the gender reveal she threw and had us pay for).  DH just keeps shaking his head because she wasn't like this with him or his sister.  At least my FIL is amazing.
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