Monday bitchfest 12/11

catlady1215 · December 2017

Getting this started now....

.....cause I could have a bitch later. it always seems to happen on days I deal with my endo office.

krash_ · December 2017

My animals. The dog was whining at 3 am. Tried to get her to just go back to sleep but that wasn't happening so I took her outside, in the snow, in my robe and slippers. Then she still wouldn't stop whining so I let her in bed with us but then I couldn't fall asleep so I kicked her out. She finally calmed down and then the cat decided to start paying with stuff on the dresser. I woke up and he had completely unraveled the roll of toilet paper.

cute pic of them snuggling on Sunday morning in spoiler to remind myself that I love them...

glitterfingers · December 2017

@krashke I love pics of cats and dogs cuddling!

doxiemoxie212 · December 2017

I have to make a plan to see my dad while we're in CA. I don't talk to or see my dad often, and it's just a cluster. He has Parkinson's Disease (which he's had since I was 5, so most of my life), and he doesn't like to take his meds regularly (which if you know anything about PD, is just greaaaat). He also got DBT (the like, sort of pacemaker for your brain) surgery a couple years ago, but he doesn't like to charge his device. He drives for Uber sometimes for fun (one of the many reasons I'm out on Uber; no way is that safe), yet he'll say he can't drive to meet us because he shouldn't be driving (sure, glad you're putting everyone on the road at risk for your own fun, but god forbid you make anything more convenient for anyone in your life). He's an artist, and I know he just wants to show me his artwork so thats why he claims he can't leave his house, but I've never cared about that kind of thing. And he has this 24-year-old girl living with him who is his "caretaker" but I'm actually worried it's some kind of sex thing (my dad is almost 72). He wants me to meet her, and the last time he was this excited for me to meet someone it was his 19-year-old girlfriend who ended up stealing a bunch of stuff from him (I was 16 at the time, and my dad had me at 42, so do the fun math on that). I know he's super excited I'm pregnant, and I see him maybe once a year, so I get that I just have to figure out a way to do this and just be fine with it - it's only a few hours of my life - but I feel like the older I get, the harder it is for me to be patient with my dad's immaturity. Like, no I don't want to talk about your favorite hallucinogenic drugs or your favorite show on the Playboy network. I also don't want to hear about how you crashed your car for the umpteenth time, or how the DMV tried to take away your license but you convinced them to give it back to you (he got in a lot of car accidents even before the PD, and I'm sure he's driving while he's high, so...). So many people in his life have tried to help him, but he just wants to ~do his own thing. Sigh. Sorry for the DD rant lol.

catlady1215 · December 2017

Ouch @doxiemoxie212 that's really tough. I'd feel exaaaactly the same way. And being pregnant really shortens your patience for bullshit. But like you said, it's only a few hours. Get in, smile, nod... then get the hell out and enjoy the rest of your vacay.

krash_ · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 while he is your dad and it wont kill you to take a few hours out of your life to spend with him but sometimes we just need to recognize that a relationship is not healthy and distance ourselves. It sounds like for the most part you have done that and you are still trying to be supportive so I don't think you should feel bad about not wanting to have him be a part of your life. Hopefully the pregnancy and baby will be enough of a distraction from discussions of drugs and playboy...

I have another BF...I saw the OB on Friday and she recommended we get the NT scan. She believes that all women should have 1st tri screening. So she put the order in and they called me today to schedule the NT scan and my anatomy scan, which she ordered a level 2 for due to MH's clef palate/lip. So I called the insurance company to make sure it would be covered. She said it's covered if it is a routine prenatal screening but if there is a diagnosis then it wont be covered because it is no longer routine care. Umm...wut??? I was like this is a scan to see if there are abnormalities to diagnose them??? So then I asked if it's not covered how much it would be and after holding for like 20 mins (enough time to make a hot apple cider and eat a cheese stick) she said that it would be $625.17, basically out of pocket because we haven't met our deductible. She also noticed that I already have a level 2 anatomy scan scheduled and said that because of MH's clef that it might not be routine.

So basically it's a gamble because if something is diagnosed then I'm sure the $625 will be worth it to be prepared and have additional testing done but there's also the chance of a false positive that they diagnose something on the NT scan but we find out later that its nothing.

doxiemoxie212 · December 2017

@krashke I know you're battling the clock on the NT scan, but can you wait to do the level 2 scan for the anatomy in 2018? So at least it's helping you meet your deductible quicker in 2018? You're going to end up paying like the whole amount of your deductible in 2018 anyway with the pregnancy, so that's sort of like a fixed cost, but if you have to pay it in 2017 it's not even going to count toward that so it'll be additional $$. (Also, completely agree WTF as counting something as routine until the diagnostic test diagnoses something??? absurd)

marcus7676 · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 - I think you have to do what is best for you in terms of your dad going forward. If you don't want to see him because it is a hassle, annoying, etc., that's one thing (and I would suck it up for the afternoon). If it is causing you anxiety or unhealthy stress, that's different. I cut my mom out of my life for various reasons (abuse, alcoholism, etc.) because it was the only way for me to protect myself. It doesn't sound like you are there yet, but if you are, you have to do right by you and the baby.

krash_ · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 yeah the level 2 a/s is scheduled for 2018 and I would think that would be covered because that is pretty standard. They're just trying to say that because the level 2 is ordered and scheduled that leads them to believe that the NT scan wont be covered because I'm already not routine. Idk it's BS and in all likelihood the NT scan will be normal and this will be moot.

icecubeinthedesert · December 2017

@krashke, don't get me started on insurance bs. My most recent experience was to call with the rest code and ask if it was covered. Should be simple for them to run it and check, right? It was for homocysteine levels, which is essentially a serum protein test. But she said it was under the category of genetic testing (even though it isn't at all), and wouldn't be covered if it was a genetic test. Well, my OB's phlebotomist messed up and sent the test when I wasn't fasting and through my insurance, then I went for it again later when I was fasting and paid oop. Ended up being a little cheaper through insurance after all. Oh and my ER bill from **TW** my last miscarriage**end TW** that was over 2x as much as they quoted us at the hospital (from $700 to $1800)? DH says the hospital billing person told him we no longer owe anything after we requested it to be audited to correct charges. I'm super worried now that we're going to get a collections notice, because that sounds super sketch.

doxiemoxie212 · December 2017

@marcus7676 I don't have any anxiety about it other than it cutting into my sitting-around-doing-nothing time at my mom's lol. My dad has always been more of a friend than a dad, and that's always been emotionally fine for me. He was never emotionally abusive, never made promises he couldn't keep, it's just like if you imagine your stoner friend never grew up - super nice, but like, super useless. I'm not a wallflower by any stretch, and I very rarely do anything I don't want to do, so for me it's more like, he's this old lonely guy who really wants to see his daughter, and that daughter is me, so I feel like once every year or two I should just suck it up. But I do wish it weren't so complicated to make the plan. (Also, honestly, this is why people should have more than one kid if they are able. Being an only child for this isht is ultra annoying. I never cared about not having siblings growing up, but I desperately wish I had siblings I could drag along for this isht now lol. Thank god for DH.)

kmurdock925 · December 2017

@krashke - I second what @doxiemoxie212 said about seeing if you can wait until 2018. Insurance is so wonky. With my first I ended up getting the cystic fibrosis test...I didn't even realize I was getting it but doc ordered it with the rest of my blood work (I'm adopted so I don't know my fam history)...yeah that little test ended up being $900...hit in 2015 and I had the baby in 2016...so super fun.

catlady1215 · December 2017

i'm gonna bitch about work place policies. I work for a large health system. one of the requirements is we have to use one of the pharmacies at one of the hospitals for our 'maintenance' medications or home delivery. The pharmacy is closed after 6pm and on wkends. but it wasn't a huge hassle when I worked on site. 5 min walk downstairs on a break, and I got my meds. but now that I'm working from home its a huge hassle... especially cause I work till 5 and the hospital is in a busy outskirt of downtown. And home delivery isn't convenient when you're dealing with thyroid dose changes at any moment... which has been my life since we started trying for a second almost 2 years ago. grrrr.

katykat03 · December 2017

MIL - she wanted to announce my pregnancy on Facebook before DH and I told everyone we wanted to tell in person. I’m sorry, but DH’s grandmother might be a little hurt if she read about it on Facebook before we told her.

No MIL it’s not your news to share.

icecubeinthedesert · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 and @krashke, don't denied claims (aka OOP) not count towards deductibles? I think this happened with my old insurance.

krash_ · December 2017

@katykat03 bright side...at least she asked first so you could tell her no?

@icecubeinthedesert from my understanding they weren't saying it would be denied completely, they just mean that it wont be covered 100% under "preventative care" or "routine prenatal care" she did say if we had already met our deductible it would be covered 80% but alas we have not met it.

@kmurdock925 my level 2 a/s is in 2018 but the NT scan would have to be done this week so nothing I can do about that being in 2017.

We are on a high deductible HSA plan so we have the $ in our HSA to cover the cost but we have been saving in our HSA for the last year for the baby to cover the cost of L&D and I really don't want to have to use that if we don't have to.

katykat03 · December 2017

@krashke I’m glad she did. I tend to wait to post it on social media until much later. Like 20+ weeks. I just don’t want to un-tell everyone on my friend list.

buffalove1211 · December 2017

@katykat03 Our parents generation is the worst part about Facebook and social media in general. They seriously just don't get it. The big Facebook pregnancy reveal makes me feel so vulnerable. Last time I waited until 24 weeks, and my mom was SO antsy about it. As if she wasn't really going to be a grandma until randoms she doesn't even talk to on a regular basis knew about it.

@krashke Insurance is the absolute worst. I called recently because I had specific questions about my plan. The best the lady could do for me was read to me exactly what I was already seeing online. I had to fight to finally have her transfer me to something who understood the plan as opposed to being able to read me a sentence over and over.

My bitchfest is directed towards the latest So Cal heat wave. I just want to wear a sweater without suffocating!

bkrahn · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 ugh sorry to hear about that.. I’m am allll too familiar with toxic relationships.

@katykat03 that sounds like something my mother would do. She was so antsy for me to announce on social media just so she could tell all of her coworkers (even though I’m sure she did either way)

my BF goes to my sister. She’s 20, just moved back into my parents house (she’s recovering from drugs and who knows what else and trying to get her life back on track - but that’s a different story) and got a puppy last week. We took DD and our dog over to my parents this weekend to meet the new puppy and introduce our dog and then got major attitude from my sister all weekend because our dog wanted to play with her dog (and vice versa) and our dog is bigger than hers so she kept getting in the way and accidentally knocking her dog over (our dog is only 7 months old and doesn’t know her size.) Then her puppy started chewing on DDs handmade bonnet and I gently swatted his nose as I took it away from him.. well that made my sister lose her shit because apparently she’s suddenly an expert dog trainer after only owning a dog for 72 hours and that’s not the way you discipline a dog *eye roll.* she does not discipline the dog because she thinks it’ll make him aggressive, and would rather treat him like an actual baby than teach him right from wrong. she then got pissed at DD for accidentally spilling her cup of water on the floor and for being in her way while she was trying to walk and so she swore at her.. I heard her swear and called her out on it. She didn’t apologize, just told me that since I thought it was okay to swat her dogs nose, it was okay for her to swear at DD. Uhh.. I was furious. Like LIVID. Like, okay. If you don’t want me to swat your dogs nose, than tell me how you DO want me to discipline your dog.. because babying him is not going to train him. At all. and no way does that ever make it okay to swear at my daughter for just simply being a toddler. Your words will have a much longer lasting impact on her than my swat on your dogs nose will. Ugh, so done

momlyfe29 · December 2017

@bkrahn I absolutely HATE when people treat their dogs like babies. My sister in law does that and her dog is the worst behaved dog I’ve ever met and beyond aggressive. It has to be sitting in her lap constantly or it runs in circle barking. And to top it off they HAVE to bring it everywhere. The dog is Satan. Literally.

BurlapandLace · December 2017

@doxiemoxie212 ~ I’m sorry

When I was 3 months pregnant with DS, I found out my SD (the man I have known as dad for all my life) was a drug addict long before he ever even met my mom and I, and never stopped. We found out because he got arrested. My mom claims she never knew. I knew he smoked pot, but I didn’t know he did what he did. Anyways. He got clean, and was clean for over a year.
Then DH and I were trying to save money to buy a house, so my parents offered for us to stay with them for a year to save money. Everything had been going great, SD was clean and we could tell, so we moved in. With our 8 month old child.
And within two weeks of us moving in, he started using again.

It’s been hard, but I’ve had to cut him out of my life for my sanity and my mental health, as well as the safety of my family. It’s super complicated because my mom is still with him - she’s delusional and thinks he’s clean *eyeroll*. So having to balance wanting my mom in my life but not wanting anything to do with her husband has been my latest struggle.

All of that to say - relationships with parents are hard. And I’m sorry yours isn’t complicated as well.

BurlapandLace · December 2017

My BF is that I somehow managed to pull a muscle in my shoulder blade (I’m assuming picking DS up or attempting to keep him from jumping on me), and it hurts like a mother. Like keeping me up at night pain. Whine

lisa2589 · December 2017

Google photos.
So I didn’t think that I was technology illiterate but apparently I have some issues... a few weeks ago I logged into gmail on desktop and it said I was dangerously low on storage so I went through and deleted a whole bunch of stuff, noticed that google photos was the biggest culprit so deleted the app from my phone (I don’t use it much for sharing and I just use my Verizon cloud for backup). Anyways, thought it was taken care of. Fast forward to today, my manager texts me asking if I got a new email because it kept saying couldn’t be delivered. Now the gmail app on my phone hasn’t told me anything about this storage issue. So I get on the desktop, lo and behold google photos is still somehow backing up photos from my phone even since I deleted it (freaky) and the storage is full again to where I can’t send or receive emails! I can only imagine it’s been full since sometime last week because now that I think about it I haven’t received anything for quite a while... it was kind of nice not to lol...

megara5 · December 2017

@BurlapandLace I messed up my shoulder a few weeks ago. It was so awful, I went to the doctor. I hope yours feels better soon.

Ash9614 · December 2017

buffalove1211 said:

@katykat03 Our parents generation is the worst part about Facebook and social media in general. They seriously just don't get it. The big Facebook pregnancy reveal makes me feel so vulnerable. Last time I waited until 24 weeks, and my mom was SO antsy about it. As if she wasn't really going to be a grandma until randoms she doesn't even talk to on a regular basis knew about it.

This! They have no filter. My mom and DH’s Dad are the worst. We told them about the baby at 12 weeks, but I’m not telling work until this week (almost 17 weeks). There have been rumblings about end of year raises not being as high as usual and I don’t want anyone to have an excuse to dock my increase. Had to tell them like 4x not to put it on Facebook. Think my FIL was offended, but oh well. My money is real life, your desire to tell randoms on social media? Not my problem.

jojoandroseanne · December 2017

glitterfingers said:

@krashke I love pics of cats and dogs cuddling!

krashke My dog has been a little crazy, too! Barking for attention (not like her), I don't know if it's related to the cold (less walks) or the pregnancy! Thankfully the cat has been well behaved. Here are mine snuggling!

glitterfingers · December 2017

@jojoandroseanne SO CUTE!

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Monday bitchfest 12/11

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