March 2018 Moms

PGAL Check In (Week of Nov. 29)

This is a safe space for those who are pregnant after a loss. General TW for this thread.


How far along are you?

Any appointments coming up?

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on?
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Re: PGAL Check In (Week of Nov. 29)

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  • How far along are you?
    26+5

    Any appointments coming up?
    I had my regular appointment today, and do the glucose screening. I still feel awful from that darn drink. My next appointment is the end of December and then after that I go to appointments every two weeks. That made this seem even more real. Lol. 

    How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
    I’m doing okay. 2.0 was super still last night and this morning when I woke up which freaked me out a little and with my glucose test today, I didn’t want to mess it up with sugar or caffeine so I didn’t do any of my usual tricks to get him moving. But he “woke up” a couple hours later than normal and I got my kick counts in and felt better about it. Plus a good heartbeat on the Doppler today. 

    GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on?
    I’m so boring... it would all go towards any debt we had and I’d spend a little on things for the boys. I need a dresser and chest of drawers for both of their rooms and I’d buy things like the double stroller and mini crib to finish off what I need for the nursery. If I decided to splurge, I’d get myself an Apple Watch. 
  • @justkeeptrying I think the look on MH’s face every time he gets to feel baby kicks is pretty much the best. It definitely tops me feeling baby kicks. Although last night, watching DS snuggle my bump and get kicked was pretty awesome too. Even though he didn’t know it was his baby brother. 

    @SoraLk there’s another thread on here that talks about how it’s okay to not like or love pregnancy and still love the baby. I think pregnancy has some really hard moments and I’ve never been that magical unicorn pregnant lady with the glow and the everything is rainbows. Also, I hope your fiancé gets a little more excited as things get closer—some guys just don’t get excited until Baby is here. 

    @ashtuesday yay for a great appointment that relieved you guys! I’ve been doing the same in regards to food and exercise but with my first, the biggest weight gain happened in the last month. Ha. Hopefully I don’t do that again. 
  • How far along are you?
    25w6d

    Any appointments coming up?
    I just had my last level 2 US, and have my glucose test next week. Also, I have another US next week because my level 2 US showed that my cervix was short...2.5cm to be exact.

    How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I'm doing well. Glad that baby looks fantastic, but now worried about my cervix. It's 2.5cm, which is .3 cm shorter than 3 weeks ago. My midwife wants to see it at a 3 or more. If it is any shorter at my upcoming US we talk about bed rest.

    GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on? Also boring adult over here. I'd pay off my student loans, and then put a bigndown payment on a different home.
  • How far along are you?
    27 weeks today!

    Any appointments coming up?
    I had a growth scan this week (Emma is measuring a whole 3 days ahead lol). I go back in 2 weeks for blood work. 

    How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
    I’m doing well. Although my fasting levels are starting to rise again so I’m sure I’ll have to adjust my insulin AGAIN. Ugh. 

    GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on?
    I would buy us a new SUV, and the rest would go toward bills so we could stop stressing about money. That would be the life. 
  • @senora76 @mdfarmchick @ashtuesday Thank you for all the kind words. I am certainly trying my best over here! I think my biggest problem is that I don't like feeling unwell, so the fact that I'll go through approximately 9 months of pregnancy symptoms is just getting to me. Knowing I'm not the only one going through this is helpful, and should help me be more positive about it.

    Also with the fiance - I almost think he's still processing the fact that he's got a little one on the way. He's working so hard lately after finding a new job, that the other day he honestly said to me "Occasionally I forget that I'm going to be a father" and looked disappointed in himself for having forgotten.  I do think he'll warm up later - I'm thinking once the baby's room is complete he'll realize that it's still very real.

    @bb3vj3n Extra chances to see baby are awesome! Hope your testing comes back clear!

    @senora76 Good to hear your trips are going well! Sorry you're jet lagged though, hopefully you can get some rest soon. :)

    @kalawa Sorry that your cervix is being stubborn, hope that the scan goes well. 

    @ashtuesday What wonderful news! So awesome!

    BabyFruit Ticker
    **TW in Spoiler**
    https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/683816

    BFP 6/30/16, MC 8/21/16
    BFP 05/04/17, 5/10/17 Emergency LAP due to ectopic. Right tube removed.

    BFP 07/12/17, ECDD 03/25/18  -  Silver Orion Born 3/23/18
    BFP 09/30/19, EDD 06/11/20

  • How far along are you?
    28+3

    Any appointments coming up?
    I’m waiting in the lab now. Change of plans, for whatever reason my body reacts terribly to the glucose tolerance test, so they’re doing it a different way this time. That said I’m fasting, it’s almost noon, and I feel like I’m going to pass out.. had I known them changing plans would push the lab out this long I would’ve rescheduled. Yikes. 

    How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
    I’m doing good pregnancy wise. Unfortunately I have a nasty tooth infection so I’ve been in tons of pain with that since I’m unable to take anything really for pain. Hoping by the 24 hour mark from starting antibiotics I’ll notice even the slightest bit of improvement. I need to see a specialist but the last time they wanted me to the specific office wanted $1000 down the day they saw me. What?????? 

    Also, I start 2 week appts after today— already! What?!!!! 

    GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on?
    Paying off student loans and medical debt. Then put some away for each of the kiddos, into savings, and take a vacation! 
  • ho hum...had my follow up ultrasound today to get those missing photos of baby girls heart. she was literally in the exact same position as last time and they still were unable to feet what they needed - so i go back again in 2 weeks. 

    I wouldn't mind so much if I was allowed to watch and see my daughter.  whenever i
    go to my usually US office they let me watch... but the hospital never does.  they didn't even give me a peek of her today.  very disappointed
  • @mdfarmchick, that is so cool that your DS has felt baby kick. I can't wait for that to happen with DS. I tried telling him the baby was kicking mommy the other day. All that resulted in was him coming over and kicking mommy too. Oops! Guess he doesn't quite understand that concept at 2.5 yet!! LOL

    @bb3vj3n, you're Canadian if I remember correctly right? Isn't it so weird how we aren't allowed to see our ultrasounds???? UGH! I've had the odd tech be absolutely fantastic and show me the heartbeat right away and answer my questions. But for the most part they don't let you see anything. Our 20 week ultrasound was in fetal assessment rather than a regular ultrasound because of our losses, and it was so nice to have the nurse show us EVERYTHING as she did it. She talked throughout and explained what was happening. So much better than sitting there in silence for 30 minutes while they poke and prod you. Hopefully at your one in 2 weeks they let you see her! And she's in a good position!!!
  • @senora76 - I have to say, I really love and am floored by your outlook when it comes to enjoying this pregnancy, since pregnancy made up so much of your time with Mars. It puts things into such clear perspective - for all the worrying us PGAL girls do during pregnancy, it is such an important reminder to appreciate the time we do get with our LOs. I've thought about it a lot since the first time I saw you mention it, and I'm really thankful you shared that with us!
  • @justkeeptrying just FYI, he had no idea what was going on and didn’t seem to care... And I get plenty of free kicks from him all.the.time, but it was pretty special to see him laying on my belly and my belly move and then his head move. I don’t know how much DS understands at 2, but I think March is going to be a big surprise!

    @kalawa I’m thinking and praying for you. I read your conversation in another thread about your cervix and I hope it stops shortening at the least. Please keep us posted. Hugs. 

    @senora76 I’m so glad you had a great trip and jet lag is the worst! Enjoy those baby kicks and I’m jealous of your three days at Disney World!

    @BrittnieMariee yay for good appointments!

    @bb3vj3n it still weirds me out how different US are in Canada. I’m sorry you didn’t get to see baby and that you have to go back again. 

    @chasingroygbiv you seem to have a rough time this pregnancy! I hope you can get your infection resolved without it costing an arm and a leg. Did your glucose test at least go well today?
  • @mdfarmchick I don’t even know how many antibiotics I’ve taken now this pregnancy. I’ve lost count and I feel so bad for baby. Of course at today’s appt they had me watch an informative video on preterm labor and listed possible causes— one being gum infection... just what I needed to hear! Ugh. 

    Glucose test went well! No GD, my levels were actually quite low (which I told them is usually the case). So at least there’s that for this week! 
  • @chasingroygbiv so very helpful. Not. Ugh. Hopefully it works and just remember, you need to be as healthy as possible to keep baby as healthy as possible. So while antibiotics aren’t necessarily ideal, they aren’t the worst thing ever. 
  • @justkeeptrying @mdfarmchick .... I've been allowed to watch all of them so far this pregnancy .... but this was the first one I had done at the hospital instead of at a tech's office and I was actually surprised that she didn't even give me a peek at the end.  

    the only other time I wasnt allowed too watch was also at the hospital - but it was to confirm pregnancy loss, so I understood them telling me that they would not be allowing me to see ( even though i desperately wanted to). 

    oh well - I'm going to try to not let it bum me out to much. healthy baby is all that matters!


  • @mdfarmchick I am just hoping for the best. I refuse to Google since we all know where that leads. I will update next week for sure. 

    And also being from Canada, and never getting to watch US. It was so peculiar (and stressful) to be able to watch my MFM level 2 US...in silence. She was a resident, so she wouldn't talk she said. Then the actual MFM comes in and starts joking with me, showing me baby peeing (bladder was full, and then disappeared ). 

    *Rant* In regards to my past posts about being angry at the ER doc who said I was MC this baby because my cervix was open 1cm. Is it wrong that I want to throw him my US report saying my cervix is closed...and to never diagnose another woman with a loss when the OB gave you specific instructions not to? *End rant*
  • so upset.... just failed my 1hr glucose challenge.

    my doc hasn't called me yet but the lab I use allowed you to check your results online... so I've already seen them 

    Damn....
  • @kalawa I don’t think it’s wrong at all to want to throw your US reports at him. And shove your still-pregnant belly in his face. Just maybe the actually doing it, would be wrong. Ha. But when I was pregnant with my first, I ended up in L&D for monitoring after we were rear ended at 34 weeks and again at 37 weeks for what I was sure was leaking amniotic fluid. Both times my experience with L&D was rather crappy. I also went in once because he hadn’t kicked and I was concerned. And I was treated like I didn’t know my own body, like I was wasting their time for coming in, and perhaps worst of all, like I was supposed to just blindly agree with everything that a resident said. Turns out I was leaking amniotic fluid, my water ended up breaking at home and everything ended up okay with a healthy baby. But I don’t think you ever forget when doctors who are supposed to be helping you, instead intentionally alarm you or treat you badly. I went in for monitoring last week to make sure I wasn’t leaking amniotic fluid and I’m at a different hospital this time—the experience was night and day. They encouraged me to come back if anything else happened to even just make me worry, they triple checked to rule out that there was a leak they could find, they told me that I could have a leak up high that is small that is hard to find and would repair itself, and just in general actually took me seriously and used compassion. I hope that the rest of your pregnancy is filled with doctors who take you seriously, who care about you and your precious baby, and medical personnel who use compassion. <3

    @bb3vj3n oh no! Did you fail by a lot or a little? Hopefully everything is fine for your three hour. Hugs. 
  • @mdfarmchick apparently my score should be under 7.8..... anything between that and 11.0 is potential GD so you test again. Anything over 11 is confirmed GD.

    I scored 8.7
  • Oh that’s really close @bb3vj3n. You will probably be fine on the three hour. 
  • Happy Friday ladies!  I'm finally feeling a bit more human now...

    @bb3vj3n I'm sorry you have to retake your test!  since its borderline hopefully you will pass that 3 hour... at least you don't find the drink hideous... I actually love that orange drink... I could easily drink a bottle right now! I am a bit concerned because my prelim I did a few weeks ago had my number about 40 pts higher than with my pregnancy with Mars... at the high end of normal.  I get retested at my next appt in mid December... just watching my sugar intake for now to be on the safe side...

    @chasingroygbiv there is an old wives tale that says you lose a tooth with every baby... and for me it was kind of true.  after my pregnancy with Vance, I had a regular check up and in the x ray they found one of my front molars had "internal resorption" and was literally going to crumble and fall out!  $2000 later I have tooth implant!!!  Im sorry you are having dental drama - its the worst.

    @kalawa In my 41 years I whole heartedly know that western medicine is a practice... it is a practice because everyone is just practicing - drs aren't super humans - and I've found a lot of terrible ones.  Some things I've run into- my epidural with Vance was administered by a student (I watched a lot of Greys Anatomy in 2006 and thought what the heck - had the perfect epidural with Zane - what could go wrong)... it did NOT work. It worked on my calves and made me throw up and feel high, but I felt everything... I was told by the MFM with Mars that I should terminate him since my SC would lead to "maternal death" and I already had children to care for... Zane's ear tube fell out and re-fused to his ear drum... and now from removing it he has perm damage... the genius RE we saw in desperation when we lost Mars assuming we'd need help conceiving since I'm so old, told me I have the face of a 35 year old and the eggs of a 45 year old -no way I could conceive at that point... then he went on vacation for 2 MONTHS and when we returned I was pregnant. He told me I have a 40% chance of miscarraige - and that my egg reserve was "shot."  I could go on and on but I'll stop there... I must say I am amazed by Chinese Medicine - within 3 mos of accupuncture and taking ancient chinese herbs, plus the supplement CoQnol - my irregular cycles tightened up, and I was pregnant at 41 beating the odds.  I have a lot more faith in chinese medicine than western medicine!

    @ashtuesday Thank you :) I feel like I am not strong enough to be a philanthropist as others who have suffered a loss like ours... like @syssa-o who throws charitable benefits in her daughter's honor, or my good friend who I met through babycenter who also lost a son to SIDS at daycare like me, she also is so strong to give back and pay it forward... so at the very least, I'm glad I can be a little inspirational by the way I see things now. :)

    Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend - im off to Disneyworld on an insane red eye tomorrow night (what was I thinking?!?!)  




    Mama to:
    Zane William 9/17/03
    Vance Xenophon 5/17/06
    Mars Florencio 11/15/16 - 3/6/17
    Nova Marsela 3/14/18
  • mdfarmchickmdfarmchick member
    edited December 2017
    @senora76 you were thinking “the most magical place on earth AND it’s decorated for Christmas!” Lol. Have fun!

    edit: because the keyboard on TB app really does do weird autocorrections that I don’t get anywhere else. 
  • @mdfarmchick I will force myself to remember that when I land at 5:30am on Sunday  :o !!!
    Mama to:
    Zane William 9/17/03
    Vance Xenophon 5/17/06
    Mars Florencio 11/15/16 - 3/6/17
    Nova Marsela 3/14/18
  • @senora76 NO WAY! I have a tooth that’s currently going to eventually do the same! Unfortunately due to a genetic disorder I struggle in the dental department no matter the care I give my teeth and I was actually born missing several teeth, so I’ll eventually need a few implants. For now I have a bridge and it works (can’t tell), but it’s not ideal.. for me anyway! How was the implant procedure for you? I would already have it done if it weren’t so costly considering I need at least 8.  :/
  • @bb3vj3n, ugh that sucks! I hope you pass the 3 hour one. I remember just bawling when I failed my 1 hour test with DS because I felt like I did something wrong. But now I realize it's so beyond our control and has nothing to do with us. I ended up passing the 3 hour one with him, but I am SO nervous about taking it this time around. I hope you pass the 3 hour one! 
  • senora76senora76 member
    edited December 2017
    @chasingroygbiv my bad tooth felt really unstable- I thought I was just getting older so I wasnt shocked something was wrong with it- just shocked that a root canal or crown wouldnt fix the issue, that my only outcome was that I’d lose the tooth. I was told that I could easily get the tooth extracted and implant put in the same day (as you know the implant process is at least 2 steps with 3 mos inbetween) so I was hoping to do that but my wonky anatomy had my nerve freakishly close to the socket so I had to get a bone graft first... all this kept adding up and I had to split the procedures between 2 calendar years to get insurance to cover 50% of it...first extraction/bone graft, then i waited til the next year (had to wait 3 mos anyway) implant surgery, than another 3 mos til i got the crown (which was another $1000) My husband is european and missing a few teeth too... he has a bridge for one gap and is strategizing his implant plan for the others... i see him messing with his bridge sometimes so i know it bugs him- the diff between the 2 is that the implant is stronger and helps you keep your bone in tact since there is a placeholder in your bone...so it is superior to a bridge BUT not without its issues- i used cheap floss from
    my MIL in Spain and got some of the stringy cheap floss stuck under the implant and couldnt get it out! sometimes food gets stuck too so I carry floss... despite all that.. I’ve had it for about 7-8 years now and have been very happy with it. 

    The bonegraft/extraction left me very very sore for days- but the actual implant surgery was an easy recovery! I paid $80 extra to get IV sedation so I was out cold... Did not want to be awake for either one!!!!

    Sorry to all you ladies who have learned way more than you needed to know about dental implants LOL!
    Mama to:
    Zane William 9/17/03
    Vance Xenophon 5/17/06
    Mars Florencio 11/15/16 - 3/6/17
    Nova Marsela 3/14/18
  • How far along are you?
    27 weeks

    Any appointments coming up?
    Not until the end of the month. 

    How are you doing?
    Meh. I've been having terrible anxiety and panic attacks over the last night. I felt really good my first pregnancy so this has been tough.  

    GTKY: If you were handed $100,000 right now, what would be the first thing you'd spend it on?
    Pay off the mortgage or go on a nice beach vacation. 
  • @mommytron I’m sorry you are dealing with panic attacks and anxiety. It’s no fun. Hugs. 
  • Thank you, @mdfarmchick I haven't participated much on TB lately due to how i've been feeling. 

    I hope that everyone's weekend is going well. 
  • @mdfarmchick check your messages inbox when you a chance. thanks!
  • @mommytron, I'm sorry about your panic attacks. Have you mentioned anything to your OB/midwife?
  • mommytronmommytron member
    edited December 2017
  • @mommytron, I'm glad you found someone to hopefully work through this with!
  • mommytronmommytron member
    edited December 2017
  • @mommytron, I hope the side effects decrease soon for you! A lot of my friends find Zoloft very helpful for their anxiety. I hope it gives you some relief!
  • @mommytron have you tried switching to taking it at night? And how has your doctor started you on it? Mine was every other day for two weeks and then every day after that. Then if you were going up to 50 mg, it would be every other day of the full dose for two weeks before taking a full dose every day. 
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