Breastfeeding Mom Check-in 10/25

ladythrice · October 2017

It's been a while since we've checked in.

How is everyone doing?

Are you experiencing any issues?

Do you have any questions or words of wisdom for the group?

ladythrice · October 2017

Hey everyone! We're doing pretty well here but we're close to fully weaning.

DD will be 16 months next month and is on target to probably be weaned at that point. I can't decided how I feel about it... I think I'm feeling nursing aversion and I feel really guilty. We still do the don't offer, don't refuse method. She asks before bed at night but is definitely just comfort nursing (although last night I felt a letdown for the first time in a while and that was weird).

I'm ready to be done. But I have all the guilt. /sigh

lindsye · October 2017

You read my thoughts today, @ladythrice! I am getting to the point where I feel like I need to wean DS. He is 17 months and showing no real signs of losing interest - with both my daughters, they were definitely losing interest by this point. But this is about the age I've weaned each of my older children, and really needed/enjoyed the several month break before being attached at the boob to another (wonderful) little creature again.

To anyone who has weaned before your child was ready (and about his age), how did you do it? I would ordinarily cut a feeding at a time, but since he doesn't want to wean I feel this might be confusing for him - he is used to nursing before naps and before bed time (and a couple times during the night, unfortunately) and I wonder if just cutting one feeding will make it worse for him.

One of my husband's good friends is getting married over NYE in Florida, and my mom has offered to deal with the tears and let us go; she thinks it might be easier for him to wean if I'm not there. I agree that that makes some sense, but I worry it will be really hard on her. Anyway, I am just not sure what to do... HELPPP!!!

dirtyboots · October 2017

DS is coming up on 15 months at the beginning of the month. We're pretty much done at this point. He asks to nurse every couple days, which I allow. I have dried up and him nursing hurts SOOO bad. It does make me sad because I would have loved to go a full 2 years or even 18 months. Guess it just wasn't in the cards for us.

riversdoctor · October 2017

Ds is 30 months and slowing way down. He still asks to nurse often but he’ll only latch for a second or two and be done. I think I’m drying up and he’s confused. It hurts my heart to make him wean on my terms but I know he’ll be ok without it.

mountainsmama · October 2017

@lindsye I just weaned my 18 mo old a few weeks ago. I was so worried about how to do it, and felt the same guilt as @ladythrice. I was so ready to be done but she still seemed pretty attached to it, especially at night.

We basically went cold turkey, and took advantage of a night we were away and she had to have a bottle instead. The night before we left I explained to her that mommy's milk was going bye bye, that she could have a sippy cup of milk or water, that I would be there for her and we could cuddle, etc., just no milk. She totally understood what I was saying and cried for several minutes. But eventually she took the sippy cup and let me rub her back and rock. The next night we were gone and the babysitter gave her a bottle. When we got back, I think I had my husband do bedtime. After 3 days of no boob she stopped asking for it! It went surprisingly smooth and I didn't have much discomfort.

The best part is - bedtimes now are a breeze (*knocks on wood), she goes down after a couple minutes of rocking, and she sleeps all night long. When I was nursing she was waking up to comfort nurse every now and then, and bedtime took forever since she just wanted to hang out on the boob. It's been a really great thing for our whole family.

I guess my advice is explain what is happening to them with love, let them cry as much as they need, and in the end they will be just FINE!

lindsye · October 2017

Thank you, @mountainsmama! That is so good to hear. Maybe I should wait another couple months to let his comprehension improve - he just turned 17 months and I feel like he might not understand my words yet. I'm glad it went well for you and was a positive improvement for your family!

ladythrice · October 2017

@lindsye If you want to start weaning now, I would consider dropping the overnight sessions first. Can DH help with MOTN wake-ups so DS isn't tempted by the buffet being so close?

lindsye · October 2017

ladythrice said:

@lindsye If you want to start weaning now, I would consider dropping the overnight sessions first. Can DH help with MOTN wake-ups so DS isn't tempted by the buffet being so close?

So he will tolerate DH at night, but since he works full time and I SAHM, I have been hesitant to ask him to take them over completely (right now he goes in probably once a night - DS had been getting his molars and now canines so it's been a lot of sleep disruption

). And yeah, if he sees me he basically expects to nurse. I agree it would be a good starting point, though, so we'll see!

julzy · October 2017

My 27 month old is still nursing at nap time if I’m with him and at bedtime. I’m honestly really ready to be done. There’s a decent amount of pain when I nurse because I’m so sore and I just want my body to myself for a little bit before the next one gets here. But at the same time I know I’ll miss it and love the connection it’s brought DS and I.

There’s also the how... I have such a hard time getting this kid to sleep as it is. I don’t want to make the process even longer. My husband often works late and he frankly doesn’t have the patience needed to help with nighttime. Not sure how we’re going to wean off night!

codingchildhood · October 2017

I've dried up, so my daughter hasn't been nursing. I wouldn't say she's quite weaned though... she's pretty upset that the milk is gone, and plans on resuming nursing when my milk comes back in. I think there's a chance she'll decide not to renew nursing at that point, but I'm not holding my breath. In the meantime, the break from nursing is nice!

ladythrice · October 2017

@codingchildhood how old is DD? After DD was born and DS saw her nursing he asked to nurse, even though he hadn't nursed in three months, and he actually forgot how to!

8bithearts · October 2017

ladythrice said:

Hey everyone! We're doing pretty well here but we're close to fully weaning.

DD will be 16 months next month and is on target to probably be weaned at that point. I can't decided how I feel about it... I think I'm feeling nursing aversion and I feel really guilty. We still do the don't offer, don't refuse method. She asks before bed at night but is definitely just comfort nursing (although last night I felt a letdown for the first time in a while and that was weird).

I'm ready to be done. But I have all the guilt. /sigh

Hugs mama! I've been there!you've made it this far and that's great!! Focus on the positives:)

codingchildhood · October 2017

ladythrice said:

@codingchildhood how old is DD? After DD was born and DS saw her nursing he asked to nurse, even though he hadn't nursed in three months, and he actually forgot how to!

She is 5, and she'll be close to six when this baby is born. I really home she forgets how to nurse by then lol.

julzy · November 2017

Bumping this back up. My milk had officially dried up and yet my kid is still dry nursing at least once a day and it’s so friggin painful! Like literally it feels like razor blades and I cry out when he first latches it’s that painful. He’s sick right now so I’m doing what I have to comfort him and get him to sleep but as soon as he’s better, I need this to end. Anyone have any advice for ending that last nursing session (ours is at nighttime) and we co-sleep. He’s 29 months so understand some of what I say. How did you talk about the end of nursing with your young toddler? Thanks all.

lindsye · November 2017

@julzy mine have been younger when I weaned them, but I still explain it to them anyway. Have you bought any of the Big Brother-type books yet? I usually tie it into that whole conversation, that nursing is something the new baby will do, that he is not a baby anymore and he will have a new role as a big brother. All my kids have been really excited about the arrival of the new baby (obvi, they feel a little bit differently a few weeks after the arrival!) but I've had success with that approach.

Also, my 18 mo DS still wants to nurse even though my supply is basically gone and I hear you on the pain. I am no longer offering any nursing at night (as step one to weaning completely) and he is all sorts of pissed about it, but he is a lot younger than your son and I'm sure it's hard for him to understand. Good luck!!

ladythrice · November 2017

@julzy, I have no advice unfortunately, just here for support! I weaned both my kiddos younger (DD1 is now fully weaned, she's 17 months this week). Good luck!

laceymarie3 · November 2017

I had to wean my son at 2 because we were going to start IVF. He had been BF at nap and bedtime. I ended up just going cold turkey. He is a pretty easygoing kid, so I just told him we were done and we could snuggle. We had gone through a lot of transition for the previous 8 months, so that was one reason we ended up BF until he was 2. He was already sleeping through the night and we didn't co-sleep, so I had those things going for me. My husband helped more at bedtime, but I am a SAHM so naps were still on me. Good luck to everyone!

Breastfeeding Mom Check-in 10/25

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