Are you a FTM, STM? Third time mom. My first was a vaginal delivery and my second was a schedule
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Due to it being a c-section, it will be just my husband due to hospital rules.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I won’t be delaying visitors. Both deliveries, anyone was welcome, and nobody was a hinderance. I don’t have a very overbearing family, so nobody overstayed their welcome or anything
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc For my daughter, I was a single mom, and my mom, sister, and my mommy 2 were in the delivery room. My dad was at the hospital nervously pacing the halls. It was adorable! For my son, it was just my husband due to the fact that it was a c-section! The families were waiting in the wings to meet our little man, though!
My SO and hopefully my mom and sister will be there this time!
With DD I had my SO, my good friend to help me through because she has been through it, and I didn't know how involved my SO would be at the time, and my mother! My sister wanted to be there but had to work!
For DD only a handful of people can to visit! I am okay with close relatives like my siblings and grandparents visiting! Just going to make sure they are all up to date on their vaccines and not sick! Wash hands and wear clean clothes!
I think having had a room full for me made the time go by, but I think it slowed my labor! This time I am hoping for just 2 (SO and sister) to be there but if my mom wants to she can be! This time I want a little more focus on me! I think I would like others to be involved more than last time! Especially SO! We have talked about what is going to be different this time around and that I want him more involved!
Are you a FTM, STM? STM, my dd will be 12yo in January.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? DH, my mom, and probably my MIL.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Haven't decided yet. I'm a private person in general, so I'd really only be OK with immediate family coming to see us in the hospital. And I know our home will be hectic the first couple weeks until we settle into a routine, so I will probably wait to have visitors at home for a while as well.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc It was just me and my mom last time. I had an extremely easy and comfortable labor last time, I'm hoping for much of the same this go-around. It will be nice to have DH stay with me the entire time though.
Repeat csection so only DH, and about a dozen of random people
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I really want my son to be the first to meet his siblings and because flu season policy he won't probably be allowed in the hospital so we'll do no visitors. I'm absolutely ok with that because I know with a toddler around this time we won't have our little bubble at home like we had with him so these 3 hospital days will be our bonding time.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Last time we only had a couple of visitors after but my mom and DH's parents came every single days for hours and it was annoying AF. Just have people there wanting to hold the baby. Mmmm sorry I won't share for a couple of hours thank you!
I Am a very private person. Just my dh. If I get to try for vbac which is doubtful at this point I may get ask a doula I know.
We did delay visitors with my first pregnancy. It was flu season at our hospital and no child under 18 could visit. Which meant my 11 year old could not meet his sibling. We did not want our friends to meet the baby bebfore he had a chance to. That said two of my gym friends stopped by while visiting a friend who had a baby the day after me. Also when our son went to nicu my parents came by to see him since their flight would be leaving soon and I didn't want them to miss out on meeting the baby.
Since I had a c section just my dh was there. He was able to immediately do skin to skin with my son after a quick assessment by the nicu team. Because of the skin to skin w my dh I couldn't actually see the baby very good until I was in recovery and he was given to me. This was so special to my dh I am happy he had that opportunity. honestly, at the time was a bit bummed I couldn't be the first to hold him.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH, unless we hire a birth photographer.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I’d rather have them at the hospital. We had like 20+ people in there at once when DD was born. It was fun, but I’ll ask people to spread out this time. I will allow people once I get home with the strict stipulation that they must be there to help in some way or bring food because DH doesn’t get a paternity leave.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc Just DH before. I am fine with that. He will not sleep the entire labor this time. He will also not tell me that the reason the nurse was constantly changing the chux pad under me while I was pushing was because I did indeed shit myself. Great story now, not fun after giving birth lol.
Last time we only had a couple of visitors after but my mom and DH's parents came every single days for hours and it was annoying AF. Just have people there wanting to hold the baby. Mmmm sorry I won't share for a couple of hours thank you!
THIS! I am afraid of exactly this. We have a relatively small home and I just know my in-laws (retired, no other children, first grandchild) will be wanting to hang out at our house all of the time. I don't mind a couple of hours every few days, but anything more than that will drive me crazy.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc Just DH before. I am fine with that. He will not sleep the entire labor this time. He will also not tell me that the reason the nurse was constantly changing the chux pad under me while I was pushing was because I did indeed shit myself. Great story now, not fun after giving birth lol.
And you didn’t punch him? You have some serious self control, girl!
Are you a FTM, STM? STM, DD will be 3 this Saturday!
Who will be in the delivery room with you? DH will be there during the birth.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Probably not, we had a lot the day she was born then after that we just had a small flow of people. Still felt like we got plenty of alone time with DD
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc I was induced so the night before it was just me and DH. In the morning my parents and MIL spent the day. They sat in my room until it was time to push then they went in the waiting room. After DD was born we took about 20 minutes to bond and feed and then DH went and got our parents. Probably will do the same this time around.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? DH and MAYBE my mom...I go back and forth on that one. She can be a little over the top sometimes and I don't want to yell at her.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I'd like to get cleaned up some and look half way presentable first. I have a feeling most people will want to come see me in the hospital because our house is a bit of a drive for everyone. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Who will be in the delivery room with you? I'm having a scheduled c-section this time, so just DH and a bunch of strangers Even if I were to go through labor, it would only be DH with me. I feel like it's such an intimate/intense experience that I only want to share with my husband.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Depends on when I deliver. If it's first thing in the morning I may have my parents come by with the kids late in the afternoon, but if it happens in the evening I won't have them visit until the next day. Those first few hours of recovery and bonding are sacred to me! Other than that, my bro and SIL can visit at some point in our hospital stay, but everyone else will have to wait until we're back home and settled in.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc Always just my husband. My first baby was born via emergency c-section so there wasn't even enough time for anyone else to get there (which I didn't want, anyway), and the second time I was induced overnight. Labor is hard enough without an audience and for me, I did not want ANYONE near me other than my husband (and even he had to keep his distance, ha!). I ultimately had another c-section so it was just him in the O/R anyway.
My two cents, for what it's worth: be vocal about what you want your delivery experience to be like. If you don't want ANYONE there other than your significant other during labor and in the immediate hours/days later, say that! The last thing you need is to be stressed out by unwanted visitors. If you're worried about people showing up unannounced or just flat-out ignoring your wishes, tell the nurses ahead of time. They are ALWAYS willing to block access to your room or kick people out (in a nice way). Make this experience exactly what you want it to be!
Are you a FTM, STM? FTM Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH. Depending on how long it takes, possibly my mom during earlier labor but definitely DH only during pushing and delivery. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I think we will definitely want to have at least a half day to ourselves with the baby before allowing any visitors. Our moms are mostly laid back about this so I don't think it'll be an issue. If I deliver late at night or very early AM we will probably allow parents and possibly our siblings later in the day. Otherwise it will be the following day. Other than immediate family it will be only our best friends allowed in the hospital, everyone else can visit once we get settled at home. I tend to get overwhelmed and am a control freak so I'm trying to limit number of potential stressors around me to keep me calm and sane!
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just SO!
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I'd love if my custody scheudle allowed DD to visit soon after, but not going to let it get me down if I can't figure out a way to get her to the hospital. Otherwise we'll likely have a steady flow of friends/family
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc My only thing this time is I just don't want people waiting out in the hall, its like eff I just gave birth, i've been in labor 24 hours, i'm bleeding like a mother and I don't want 7 people coming in immediately (while still in my delivery room) to play pass the baby. I probably won't be telling anyone when I go into labor except the friends I will rely on to help with DD...and my mom no longer lives within driving distance...can I get an amen.
Are you a FTM, STM? third time mom Who will be in the delivery room with you? dh and necessary medical personnel Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) grandparents probably will show up that night along with a few close friends. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc same plan as my last two.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Likely only DH. He was the only one with me for my last two deliveries. Part of me thinks it would be neat for my mom to be there for the third, but it is such an intimate rush of emotion and a very special thing to share between DH and I that he really appreciates. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Likely, no. Our hospital does the golden hour where mom and baby bond for an hour of skin to skin. We usually cut that short about thirty minutes and welcome our parents in. DH's parents will have both DS and DD and I can't wait for them to meet the baby. Otherwise, I honestly doubt we'll have many visitors- it's a bit of a "been there done that" experience once the third arrives. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc I always had my parents in the room with me before up until pushing. I prefer it that way. I feel supported, distracted, and don't want them to miss out on the experience for us to share. I'm an only child, so they're all I've got.
Adding if you are a second time mom, I would encourage you to have DH/SO stay with you in the hospital. When I had DD I was so worried about DS keeping his routine, that I send DH home to be with him. It made for some HARD nights being alone with babe in the beginning.
Are you a FTM, STM? STM Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH and my doula. C'mon VBAC! Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) YES! I'm sure grandparents will want to come to the hospital, but they will also be in charge of DS at home. I will not allow any other visitors until we are home and settled. The first few days are for topless bonding If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc Last time it was also just my DH and the doula, grandparents came to the hospital right when DS was born. He was in the NICU and I was recovering from the emergency c-section. They spent a lot of time in waiting rooms, so we might tell them to hold off a bit this time, just in case.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just my husband - scheduled repeat C/S
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Maybe. We had way too many visitors with my first and it was exhausting. This time just parents and siblings.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc My husband. Even though it was a c section with the surgical and NICU teams present, it still felt like a very intimate moment between my husband and I.
Me (33). DH (37). DD (2.2012). MCs x4. After 4 years & 7 months, due 4.2018!
Just adding my two cents about visitors. If you’re not sure what you want to do about people visiting, I HIGHLY recommend you encourage them to visit at the hospital. I found that when people visited at the hospital and I got tired or needed to nurse the baby, it was MUCH easier to have the nurses kick out the guests. That’s hard at home and feels awkward. Plus some home guests want you to feed them. I found that when I got home (at least the first week or two) guests drove me nuts because I just wanted to sit around my house with no shirt on (because baby nurses all the time anyway haha) and wanted to sleep. I much preferred that they visited before we had gone home!
Mama to Rowan Sebastian and baby boy coming in April!
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just my husband.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc). I will delay visitors until I’ve moved from the delivery room to the mom & baby floor. And until I’ve gotten cleaned up, dressed, and more importantly, fed.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc My husband was the only one in the room before, and he was awful. He kept telling me it didn’t hurt and that I was being dramatic. Still, I wouldn’t change anything. I’m not comfortable having anyone else watch.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc My husband was the only one in the room before, and he was awful. He kept telling me it didn’t hurt and that I was being dramatic. Still, I wouldn’t change anything. I’m not comfortable having anyone else watch.
Ummmm, your husband needs to be more supportive! How the hell would he know?!
@growingournest such a great point that I wouldn't have thought of! Will def add that to the discussion with DH about our hospital time and also makes me think he and I need to make up a secret signal for when I've had too much with a home visitor and it's time for him to shuffle them out
@sdavis2189 such a good call on making sure you've eaten before hospital visitors come - I tend to get hangry on a regular day so will def keep that in mind! Also sorry your H wasn't super supportive last time - hopefully things will be different this go around now that he's seen everything you went through!
Are you a FTM, STM? STM Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH again. I was such a hot mess the first delivery I honestly cannot imagine other people being around that. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) The plan will be to delay again. Although last time my parents just showed up a few hours after delivery without the okay to visit. I was not physically ready for visitors so I was kind of annoyed. Example - while they were there the nurse came in to tell me I needed to empty my bladder as she helped me out of bed I peed all over the floor, my dad was visibly uncomfortable. Oh well, dude. Then the in-laws came but I made them wait out in the hall for 20 mins while I finished nursing. As for at home visitors, people know I'm pretty private (and can be an asshole) so no one just "popped over". It wasn't until the 2nd week that we had anyone over. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc DH only. I wouldn't change anything about that.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Likely just my husband. I am slightly concerned about this because he gets really freaked out with anything health-related.. IV's, shots, blood, wounds, etc. I told him he'll just have to stay by my head when I'm pushing. Part of me wants my mom to be in the room, although I'm not entirely sure she'd feel comfortable with that. As it gets closer, I may ask.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) It's very helpful reading the responses from the STM on this issue. I think we will likely delay visitors for at least a few hours (maybe more) after delivery. We will likely only have immediate family come to visit, and they all live close by. I definitely want visitors, but I don't want it to become overwhelming either.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
@mikkimikey lol I didn’t realize what he was saying at the time until I stopped to think about it after I was all showered and like WTF? He was in a drunken stupor or baby love, so I guess it’s excusable? I think I need to read him the book “Everybody Poops.”
Who will be in the delivery room with you? My husband, my mom and sisters probably until I get to the pushing part.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I'm not sure. My parents, sisters, grandma, aunt, MIL, FIL, SIL, BIL, and their significant others were all there last time and I don't know if they'll want to visit in the hospital again this time. FIL was very embarrassed by the whole BF thing haha and most of them spent half the time in the hallway at the hospital anyway since you can't fit that many people in at a time. Visitors when we got home weren't so bad, so I don't think I'll mind whoever comes. It was just when people came in big huge groups that I felt a little territorial. I think it'll be a nice distraction this time and plus if people bring food/help with DS that would be great! DH is also planning on taking more than a week this time THANK GOODNESS.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc. DH, my mom, and my sisters were in the room all the way up until pushing. Then my mom and sisters went on a walk, which was good since there were 12-ish people in the room. What I didn't like was that we had an hour alone with DS, but nobody told my family or inlaws that we were okay and had a boy. So they were waiting in the waiting room and the nurses wouldn't tell them anything. That might be my oversight though so this time I'll make sure to send someone out to tell them it's ok
Who will be in the delivery room with you? I want to say my husband, but my gosh, he is so super squeamish. I kind of wonder if he should not be there and come in when I hopefully have the baby in my arms? I don't know what to do about this, if anyone has kind of a delicate husband, any advice would be helpful.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I will probably be so happy to see my parents. I will probably delay anyone other than my parents and I think my husband's parents will be patient. Then I will be happy to welcome some family to see the baby as well.
Are you a FTM, STM? Third time mom! (and the last time we are doing this rodeo! ) Who will be in the delivery room with you? Repeat C/S - just my husband, my OB, and a team of perfect strangers. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Since it's a repeat C/S, it'll probably be super early in the morning. I think (other than my parents), I'll request everyone else come see us after lunchtime. Last time it took me a while to come out of recovery because they had to give me some pretty hardcore anti-panic meds and I was super doped up, so everyone was hanging out in our regular room WITH MY BABY before I even got to see her again and try to nurse. Not cool. When I got there, I immediately popped out my boob and started nursing for the first time - which can be a little challenging even for someone who has done it before - and made basically everyone uncomfortable. So, this time, I want to nurse and eat, and then anyone can come see us! I don't mind nursing in front of people, but I'd prefer it not be the first time I've done it in several years.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc If I could have my mom in the delivery room with me AND DH, I would. But she'd be there for sure if I was delivering vaginally. I will INSIST upon immediate skin to skin contact with baby before they take him/her away this time, so I don't freak in the recovery room like I did last time.
Are you a FTM, STM? STM Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH. No one else needs to see any of my parts or what's going on, lol. Plus, I just want it to be only us to be with the baby first. I don't mind if my mom or people are in "during labor," but not during checks or push time. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) Probably not...maybe just family the first day and anyone else the next. We don't have any family near us really, so it'll probably just be my mom, and DH's mom and sister are planning on coming up from GA. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc It was just me and DH. I had a long, painful 30 hour labor, so my mom was in and out for a while keeping us company. I wouldn't change it! I liked it being just us.
I am not really sure at this point probably just DH. @stalkinghorse my hubby is squeamish too. His plan is to focus on me and providing a level of calm for me so he is kinda distracted (sounds terrible I know lol) from all of the parts that make him squeamish.
I don't think I will delay visitors. Only for the fact that many of my mommy friends have said that if they visit in the hospital they are less likely to visit at home and we want a few days to ourselves at home to settle into our routine.
Family lives out of town so, no one will see us at the hospital, but will probs fly in the day I leave. That's what we did last time and out was awesome. They already come check on you so much, I couldn't imagine trying to entertain. Hubs will probs be at home with DD, so out will be good one on one bonding for me and the new little one.
DH and a friend who works at a birth collective who had "doulaed" for several of her friends. She will double as birth photographer, if I can handle it. I'm very private and may decide it's not for me.
Yes to delayed visits. We don't have family in the area, so it would only be a handful of friends who visit. I want time to recover (especially if I have another C), nurse, bond, etc.
DH was with me before but we ended us with a C section. I was very sick from it and puking my guts out, and it really ruined those first moments for me. I'm hoping to avoid that again. DH wasn't the best supporter, he said because I was so quiet he thought I was fine, so I'm hoping the doula role will help.
DH and a friend who works at a birth collective who had "doulaed" for several of her friends. She will double as birth photographer, if I can handle it. I'm very private and may decide it's not for me.
Yes to delayed visits. We don't have family in the area, so it would only be a handful of friends who visit. I want time to recover (especially if I have another C), nurse, bond, etc.
DH was with me before but we ended us with a C section. I was very sick from it and puking my guts out, and it really ruined those first moments for me. I'm hoping to avoid that again. DH wasn't the best supporter, he said because I was so quiet he thought I was fine, so I'm hoping the doula role will help.
*****stuck in the damn box!*****
@okayrunner so much the same. Puking during a c/s is terrifying and I was heaving through the whole thing (both times!) I even told the anesthesiologist prior to the second c/s and he made sure to give me anti-nausea meds, but he made the mistake of stopping them as I was being sewn back up and I puked everywhere. Ugh it's so awful.
Are you a FTM, STM? Third time momma Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just my H. We like the private moment to ourselves. Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
We will allow our parents to come up first with our girls and then family and super close friends after that.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc With #2 my H had a super important meeting and my mom subbed in for a bit. I think she would have liked to stay but we booted her when he got back. Luckily for H I apparently had two bags of water so my labor was delayed a bit so h didn’t miss anything.
3rd time mom here too! Damn I'm still getting used to the idea of having 3 kids in the future.
For my 1st my mom and DH were in the room. I kicked my mom out whenever they checked me and to push. I needed some level of privacy. 2nd time it was me and DH only and i preferred it.
W DD1 we literally had people in my l&d room after all was said and done. I had severe pre-e and HELLP and lost a lot of blood when they tired to move me and i felt bad telling everyone who was waiting for hours to go away. I told DH they could see the baby but to leave me alone. They respected my wishes tho i did see a few concerned stares. W DD2 it was during a snow storm which to some may sound like a nightmare but it was awesome bc no one could travel. It was amazing being left alone until the next day.
This is going to sound awful but i kinda want to be left alone. I am praying i deliver on the weekend bc then everyone will be working during the week when i get home. Leave me beeeeeee! I just want to connect baby w my girls and bleed in semi-peace.
I wouldn't change anything from my experience w dd2. Just me and H and eventually out newest addition.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) We had 10+ visitors in the waiting room while I was delivering. It was awful. Then It was pass the baby around when they all came into the cramped room. I do want to change how that goes down but also we won't be having anyone come visit the house for 2 weeks. With DD I was a mess and with hormones I couldn't handle everyone coming over and staying past 10pm without helping around the house. We need time to adjust to a family of 4. If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc DH was in the room and it will only be DH again. Too many people in the room is annoying when you're in pain and people coming in and out constantly like it's a movie doesn't sit well with me.
3rd time mom here too! Damn I'm still getting used to the idea of having 3 kids in the future.
For my 1st my mom and DH were in the room. I kicked my mom out whenever they checked me and to push. I needed some level of privacy. 2nd time it was me and DH only and i preferred it.
W DD1 we literally had people in my l&d room after all was said and done. I had severe pre-e and HELLP and lost a lot of blood when they tired to move me and i felt bad telling everyone who was waiting for hours to go away. I told DH they could see the baby but to leave me alone. They respected my wishes tho i did see a few concerned stares. W DD2 it was during a snow storm which to some may sound like a nightmare but it was awesome bc no one could travel. It was amazing being left alone until the next day.
This is going to sound awful but i kinda want to be left alone. I am praying i deliver on the weekend bc then everyone will be working during the week when i get home. Leave me beeeeeee! I just want to connect baby w my girls and bleed in semi-peace.
I wouldn't change anything from my experience w dd2. Just me and H and eventually out newest addition.
@beach_mama wanting to be alone with your husband and newborn doesn't sound awful at all. The opposite, in fact. I also really wish you didn't have to pray to deliver on a weekend in order to left in peace when you get home. Is there a reason why you can't outline your wishes to your family prior to the delivery? It's your third kid, obviously you know what's right for you. They should be more than understanding about what you request.
@beach_mama I get that. If I thought only of myself I wouldn't have any visitors to the hospital at all, but I know that would kill my parents.
Just think about limiting who gets access to you and when -- your mental health and happiness is still more important than their excitement to see the baby.
Re: Delivery room survey
Third time mom. My first was a vaginal delivery and my second was a schedule
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Due to it being a c-section, it will be just my husband due to hospital rules.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I won’t be delaying visitors. Both deliveries, anyone was welcome, and nobody was a hinderance. I don’t have a very overbearing family, so nobody overstayed their welcome or anything
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
For my daughter, I was a single mom, and my mom, sister, and my mommy 2 were in the delivery room. My dad was at the hospital nervously pacing the halls. It was adorable!
For my son, it was just my husband due to the fact that it was a c-section! The families were waiting in the wings to meet our little man, though!
My SO and hopefully my mom and sister will be there this time!
With DD I had my SO, my good friend to help me through because she has been through it, and I didn't know how involved my SO would be at the time, and my mother! My sister wanted to be there but had to work!
For DD only a handful of people can to visit! I am okay with close relatives like my siblings and grandparents visiting! Just going to make sure they are all up to date on their vaccines and not sick! Wash hands and wear clean clothes!
I think having had a room full for me made the time go by, but I think it slowed my labor! This time I am hoping for just 2 (SO and sister) to be there but if my mom wants to she can be! This time I want a little more focus on me! I think I would like others to be involved more than last time! Especially SO! We have talked about what is going to be different this time around and that I want him more involved!
STM, my dd will be 12yo in January.
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
DH, my mom, and probably my MIL.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Haven't decided yet. I'm a private person in general, so I'd really only be OK with immediate family coming to see us in the hospital. And I know our home will be hectic the first couple weeks until we settle into a routine, so I will probably wait to have visitors at home for a while as well.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
It was just me and my mom last time. I had an extremely easy and comfortable labor last time, I'm hoping for much of the same this go-around. It will be nice to have DH stay with me the entire time though.
Me: 29 DH: 35
Married 5/3/14, TTC ever since
DX: Lean PCOS, Clomid resistant
Femara 7.5 + Ovidrel = BFP! Due 4/15/18
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Repeat csection so only DH, and about a dozen of random people
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I really want my son to be the first to meet his siblings and because flu season policy he won't probably be allowed in the hospital so we'll do no visitors. I'm absolutely ok with that because I know with a toddler around this time we won't have our little bubble at home like we had with him so these 3 hospital days will be our bonding time.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Last time we only had a couple of visitors after but my mom and DH's parents came every single days for hours and it was annoying AF. Just have people there wanting to hold the baby. Mmmm sorry I won't share for a couple of hours thank you!
I Am a very private person. Just my dh. If I get to try for vbac which is doubtful at this point I may get ask a doula I know.
We did delay visitors with my first pregnancy. It was flu season at our hospital and no child under 18 could visit. Which meant my 11 year old could not meet his sibling. We did not want our friends to meet the baby bebfore he had a chance to. That said two of my gym friends stopped by while visiting a friend who had a baby the day after me. Also when our son went to nicu my parents came by to see him since their flight would be leaving soon and I didn't want them to miss out on meeting the baby.
Since I had a c section just my dh was there. He was able to immediately do skin to skin with my son after a quick assessment by the nicu team. Because of the skin to skin w my dh I couldn't actually see the baby very good until I was in recovery and he was given to me. This was so special to my dh I am happy he had that opportunity. honestly, at the time was a bit bummed I couldn't be the first to hold him.
STM.
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just DH, unless we hire a birth photographer.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I’d rather have them at the hospital. We had like 20+ people in there at once when DD was born. It was fun, but I’ll ask people to spread out this time. I will allow people once I get home with the strict stipulation that they must be there to help in some way or bring food because DH doesn’t get a paternity leave.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Just DH before. I am fine with that. He will not sleep the entire labor this time. He will also not tell me that the reason the nurse was constantly changing the chux pad under me while I was pushing was because I did indeed shit myself. Great story now, not fun after giving birth lol.
Me: 29 DH: 35
Married 5/3/14, TTC ever since
DX: Lean PCOS, Clomid resistant
Femara 7.5 + Ovidrel = BFP! Due 4/15/18
STM, DD will be 3 this Saturday!
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
DH will be there during the birth.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Probably not, we had a lot the day she was born then after that we just had a small flow of people. Still felt like we got plenty of alone time with DD
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
I was induced so the night before it was just me and DH. In the morning my parents and MIL spent the day. They sat in my room until it was time to push then they went in the waiting room. After DD was born we took about 20 minutes to bond and feed and then DH went and got our parents. Probably will do the same this time around.
FTM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
DH and MAYBE my mom...I go back and forth on that one. She can be a little over the top sometimes and I don't want to yell at her.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I'd like to get cleaned up some and look half way presentable first. I have a feeling most people will want to come see me in the hospital because our house is a bit of a drive for everyone.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Third time mom!
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
I'm having a scheduled c-section this time, so just DH and a bunch of strangers Even if I were to go through labor, it would only be DH with me. I feel like it's such an intimate/intense experience that I only want to share with my husband.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Depends on when I deliver. If it's first thing in the morning I may have my parents come by with the kids late in the afternoon, but if it happens in the evening I won't have them visit until the next day. Those first few hours of recovery and bonding are sacred to me! Other than that, my bro and SIL can visit at some point in our hospital stay, but everyone else will have to wait until we're back home and settled in.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Always just my husband. My first baby was born via emergency c-section so there wasn't even enough time for anyone else to get there (which I didn't want, anyway), and the second time I was induced overnight. Labor is hard enough without an audience and for me, I did not want ANYONE near me other than my husband (and even he had to keep his distance, ha!). I ultimately had another c-section so it was just him in the O/R anyway.
My two cents, for what it's worth: be vocal about what you want your delivery experience to be like. If you don't want ANYONE there other than your significant other during labor and in the immediate hours/days later, say that! The last thing you need is to be stressed out by unwanted visitors. If you're worried about people showing up unannounced or just flat-out ignoring your wishes, tell the nurses ahead of time. They are ALWAYS willing to block access to your room or kick people out (in a nice way). Make this experience exactly what you want it to be!
FTM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just DH. Depending on how long it takes, possibly my mom during earlier labor but definitely DH only during pushing and delivery.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I think we will definitely want to have at least a half day to ourselves with the baby before allowing any visitors. Our moms are mostly laid back about this so I don't think it'll be an issue. If I deliver late at night or very early AM we will probably allow parents and possibly our siblings later in the day. Otherwise it will be the following day. Other than immediate family it will be only our best friends allowed in the hospital, everyone else can visit once we get settled at home. I tend to get overwhelmed and am a control freak so I'm trying to limit number of potential stressors around me to keep me calm and sane!
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Married: 10/3/15
TTC: May 2017
BFP: 7/20/17
EDD: 3/29/18
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just SO!
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
I'd love if my custody scheudle allowed DD to visit soon after, but not going to let it get me down if I can't figure out a way to get her to the hospital. Otherwise we'll likely have a steady flow of friends/family
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
My only thing this time is I just don't want people waiting out in the hall, its like eff I just gave birth, i've been in labor 24 hours, i'm bleeding like a mother and I don't want 7 people coming in immediately (while still in my delivery room) to play pass the baby. I probably won't be telling anyone when I go into labor except the friends I will rely on to help with DD...and my mom no longer lives within driving distance...can I get an amen.
third time mom
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
dh and necessary medical personnel
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
grandparents probably will show up that night along with a few close friends.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
same plan as my last two.
Third time mom.
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Likely only DH. He was the only one with me for my last two deliveries. Part of me thinks it would be neat for my mom to be there for the third, but it is such an intimate rush of emotion and a very special thing to share between DH and I that he really appreciates.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Likely, no. Our hospital does the golden hour where mom and baby bond for an hour of skin to skin. We usually cut that short about thirty minutes and welcome our parents in. DH's parents will have both DS and DD and I can't wait for them to meet the baby. Otherwise, I honestly doubt we'll have many visitors- it's a bit of a "been there done that" experience once the third arrives.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
I always had my parents in the room with me before up until pushing. I prefer it that way. I feel supported, distracted, and don't want them to miss out on the experience for us to share. I'm an only child, so they're all I've got.
Adding if you are a second time mom, I would encourage you to have DH/SO stay with you in the hospital. When I had DD I was so worried about DS keeping his routine, that I send DH home to be with him. It made for some HARD nights being alone with babe in the beginning.
DS-9/2012
DD-7/2015
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just DH and my doula. C'mon VBAC!
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
YES! I'm sure grandparents will want to come to the hospital, but they will also be in charge of DS at home. I will not allow any other visitors until we are home and settled. The first few days are for topless bonding
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Last time it was also just my DH and the doula, grandparents came to the hospital right when DS was born. He was in the NICU and I was recovering from the emergency c-section. They spent a lot of time in waiting rooms, so we might tell them to hold off a bit this time, just in case.
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just my husband - scheduled repeat C/S
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Maybe. We had way too many visitors with my first and it was exhausting. This time just parents and siblings.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
My husband. Even though it was a c section with the surgical and NICU teams present, it still felt like a very intimate moment between my husband and I.
Me (33). DH (37). DD (2.2012). MCs x4. After 4 years & 7 months, due 4.2018!
Mama to Rowan Sebastian and baby boy coming in April!
Stm
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just my husband.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc).
I will delay visitors until I’ve moved from the delivery room to the mom & baby floor. And until I’ve gotten cleaned up, dressed, and more importantly, fed.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
My husband was the only one in the room before, and he was awful. He kept telling me it didn’t hurt and that I was being dramatic. Still, I wouldn’t change anything. I’m not comfortable having anyone else watch.
Baby #1 - DD 8/29/16
Baby #2 - EDD 4/6/18
@sdavis2189 such a good call on making sure you've eaten before hospital visitors come - I tend to get hangry on a regular day so will def keep that in mind! Also sorry your H wasn't super supportive last time - hopefully things will be different this go around now that he's seen everything you went through!
Married: 10/3/15
TTC: May 2017
BFP: 7/20/17
EDD: 3/29/18
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just DH again. I was such a hot mess the first delivery I honestly cannot imagine other people being around that.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
The plan will be to delay again. Although last time my parents just showed up a few hours after delivery without the okay to visit. I was not physically ready for visitors so I was kind of annoyed. Example - while they were there the nurse came in to tell me I needed to empty my bladder as she helped me out of bed I peed all over the floor, my dad was visibly uncomfortable. Oh well, dude. Then the in-laws came but I made them wait out in the hall for 20 mins while I finished nursing.
As for at home visitors, people know I'm pretty private (and can be an asshole) so no one just "popped over". It wasn't until the 2nd week that we had anyone over.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
DH only. I wouldn't change anything about that.
Who will be in the delivery room with you? Likely just my husband. I am slightly concerned about this because he gets really freaked out with anything health-related.. IV's, shots, blood, wounds, etc. I told him he'll just have to stay by my head when I'm pushing. Part of me wants my mom to be in the room, although I'm not entirely sure she'd feel comfortable with that. As it gets closer, I may ask.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) It's very helpful reading the responses from the STM on this issue. I think we will likely delay visitors for at least a few hours (maybe more) after delivery. We will likely only have immediate family come to visit, and they all live close by. I definitely want visitors, but I don't want it to become overwhelming either.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
Who will be in the delivery room with you? My husband, my mom and sisters probably until I get to the pushing part.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I'm not sure. My parents, sisters, grandma, aunt, MIL, FIL, SIL, BIL, and their significant others were all there last time and I don't know if they'll want to visit in the hospital again this time. FIL was very embarrassed by the whole BF thing haha and most of them spent half the time in the hallway at the hospital anyway since you can't fit that many people in at a time.
Visitors when we got home weren't so bad, so I don't think I'll mind whoever comes. It was just when people came in big huge groups that I felt a little territorial. I think it'll be a nice distraction this time and plus if people bring food/help with DS that would be great! DH is also planning on taking more than a week this time THANK GOODNESS.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc. DH, my mom, and my sisters were in the room all the way up until pushing. Then my mom and sisters went on a walk, which was good since there were 12-ish people in the room. What I didn't like was that we had an hour alone with DS, but nobody told my family or inlaws that we were okay and had a boy. So they were waiting in the waiting room and the nurses wouldn't tell them anything. That might be my oversight though so this time I'll make sure to send someone out to tell them it's ok
Who will be in the delivery room with you? I want to say my husband, but my gosh, he is so super squeamish. I kind of wonder if he should not be there and come in when I hopefully have the baby in my arms? I don't know what to do about this, if anyone has kind of a delicate husband, any advice would be helpful.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc) I will probably be so happy to see my parents. I will probably delay anyone other than my parents and I think my husband's parents will be patient. Then I will be happy to welcome some family to see the baby as well.
Third time mom! (and the last time we are doing this rodeo! )
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Repeat C/S - just my husband, my OB, and a team of perfect strangers.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Since it's a repeat C/S, it'll probably be super early in the morning. I think (other than my parents), I'll request everyone else come see us after lunchtime. Last time it took me a while to come out of recovery because they had to give me some pretty hardcore anti-panic meds and I was super doped up, so everyone was hanging out in our regular room WITH MY BABY before I even got to see her again and try to nurse. Not cool. When I got there, I immediately popped out my boob and started nursing for the first time - which can be a little challenging even for someone who has done it before - and made basically everyone uncomfortable. So, this time, I want to nurse and eat, and then anyone can come see us! I don't mind nursing in front of people, but I'd prefer it not be the first time I've done it in several years.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
If I could have my mom in the delivery room with me AND DH, I would. But she'd be there for sure if I was delivering vaginally. I will INSIST upon immediate skin to skin contact with baby before they take him/her away this time, so I don't freak in the recovery room like I did last time.
STM
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just DH. No one else needs to see any of my parts or what's going on, lol. Plus, I just want it to be only us to be with the baby first. I don't mind if my mom or people are in "during labor," but not during checks or push time.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
Probably not...maybe just family the first day and anyone else the next. We don't have any family near us really, so it'll probably just be my mom, and DH's mom and sister are planning on coming up from GA.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
It was just me and DH. I had a long, painful 30 hour labor, so my mom was in and out for a while keeping us company. I wouldn't change it! I liked it being just us.
I am not really sure at this point probably just DH. @stalkinghorse my hubby is squeamish too. His plan is to focus on me and providing a level of calm for me so he is kinda distracted (sounds terrible I know lol) from all of the parts that make him squeamish.
I don't think I will delay visitors. Only for the fact that many of my mommy friends have said that if they visit in the hospital they are less likely to visit at home and we want a few days to ourselves at home to settle into our routine.
Only DH.
Family lives out of town so, no one will see us at the hospital, but will probs fly in the day I leave. That's what we did last time and out was awesome. They already come check on you so much, I couldn't imagine trying to entertain. Hubs will probs be at home with DD, so out will be good one on one bonding for me and the new little one.
DH and a friend who works at a birth collective who had "doulaed" for several of her friends. She will double as birth photographer, if I can handle it. I'm very private and may decide it's not for me.
Yes to delayed visits. We don't have family in the area, so it would only be a handful of friends who visit. I want time to recover (especially if I have another C), nurse, bond, etc.
DH was with me before but we ended us with a C section. I was very sick from it and puking my guts out, and it really ruined those first moments for me. I'm hoping to avoid that again. DH wasn't the best supporter, he said because I was so quiet he thought I was fine, so I'm hoping the doula role will help.
Third time momma
Who will be in the delivery room with you?
Just my H. We like the private moment to ourselves.
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
We will allow our parents to come up first with our girls and then family and super close friends after that.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
With #2 my H had a super important meeting and my mom subbed in for a bit. I think she would have liked to stay but we booted her when he got back. Luckily for H I apparently had two bags of water so my labor was delayed a bit so h didn’t miss anything.
For my 1st my mom and DH were in the room. I kicked my mom out whenever they checked me and to push. I needed some level of privacy. 2nd time it was me and DH only and i preferred it.
W DD1 we literally had people in my l&d room after all was said and done. I had severe pre-e and HELLP and lost a lot of blood when they tired to move me and i felt bad telling everyone who was waiting for hours to go away. I told DH they could see the baby but to leave me alone. They respected my wishes tho i did see a few concerned stares. W DD2 it was during a snow storm which to some may sound like a nightmare but it was awesome bc no one could travel. It was amazing being left alone until the next day.
This is going to sound awful but i kinda want to be left alone. I am praying i deliver on the weekend bc then everyone will be working during the week when i get home. Leave me beeeeeee! I just want to connect baby w my girls and bleed in semi-peace.
I wouldn't change anything from my experience w dd2. Just me and H and eventually out newest addition.
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Who will be in the delivery room with you? Just DH
Will you be delaying visitors? (Having them come the next day, when you get home, do a Sip N See, etc)
We had 10+ visitors in the waiting room while I was delivering. It was awful. Then It was pass the baby around when they all came into the cramped room. I do want to change how that goes down but also we won't be having anyone come visit the house for 2 weeks. With DD I was a mess and with hormones I couldn't handle everyone coming over and staying past 10pm without helping around the house. We need time to adjust to a family of 4.
If you are a STM, who was in the room with you before? Is there anything you would change? Add? Etc
DH was in the room and it will only be DH again. Too many people in the room is annoying when you're in pain and people coming in and out constantly like it's a movie doesn't sit well with me.
I like what you said though...i need to think on it. Good news is there is a lot of time between now and then to figure it out.
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Just think about limiting who gets access to you and when -- your mental health and happiness is still more important than their excitement to see the baby.