March 2018 Moms
belindablumenthal
member
Formula Feeding
belindablumenthal
member
Hi, guys. I'm super new around here and a bit nervous to be posting A Brand New Thread but I got some encouragement that the topic of formula feeding would be met with approval, so here goes.
I'm basically jacking the following from the April 2018 board, where there's an interesting thread on the subject. (I'll preface the following by saying that this is my first pregnancy and so I'm looking for information rather than being in a position to offer it – sorry about that.)
Why are you choosing to formula feed, if you're comfortable saying?
What formula do you plan on using (subject to change of course if allergies present)?
STM/TTM – any tips on drying up your milk supply after delivery?
Please share how you dealt (or are planning to deal) with judgement and guilt.
If this will be your first baby, do you have any particular questions or concerns that more experienced moms might be able to answer?
(I'll provide my own answer to that last question in the comments so as to keep this less cluttered.)
Thanks in advance for sharing!
I'm basically jacking the following from the April 2018 board, where there's an interesting thread on the subject. (I'll preface the following by saying that this is my first pregnancy and so I'm looking for information rather than being in a position to offer it – sorry about that.)
Why are you choosing to formula feed, if you're comfortable saying?
What formula do you plan on using (subject to change of course if allergies present)?
STM/TTM – any tips on drying up your milk supply after delivery?
Please share how you dealt (or are planning to deal) with judgement and guilt.
If this will be your first baby, do you have any particular questions or concerns that more experienced moms might be able to answer?
(I'll provide my own answer to that last question in the comments so as to keep this less cluttered.)
Thanks in advance for sharing!
Re: Formula Feeding
I'm definitely concerned about being unsupported in this decision at the hospital where I'll deliver. I've heard bad things about baby-friendly hospitals, and while my OB is supportive of me formula feeding, I know this particular hospital strongly favors breast-feeding. I'd appreciate hearing how other women handled feeling pressured to breastfeed immediately postpartum.
(Edited to remove unnecessary hyphens.)
Why are you choosing to formula feed, if you're comfortable saying? my son and I had a lot of difficulty breastfeeding. Undiagnosed lip tie, clogged ducts, oversupply. I weaned at 6 months because I hated the process and felt disconnected from him. It was amazing to be free from how I felt feeding him. We have a better bond because of it.
What formula do you plan on using (subject to change of course if allergies present)? my son could only tolerate the ready to feed Similac advantage until he was 11 months old when I discovered Aldi brand powder similar. He did better on that than anything. I highly recommend generic formulas, they all meet the same FDA requirements and sometimes kids actually do better on them.
STM/TTM – any tips on drying up your milk supply after delivery? I took high doses of Sudafed and pumped to comfort, but but that was with an established supply. A well fitting (not too tight) of a bra and cold cabbage leaves will help. Sudafed if you need it once your milk comes in. Be sure not to allow any stimulation to your breasts and keep the hot water from the shower off of them. I wore a supportive nursing bra in the shower to help prevent them from moving and being stimulated.
Please share how you dealt (or are planning to deal) with judgement and guilt. don’t be afraid to tell people to eff off. Seriously, the kid isn’t coming out of their body and they aren’t paying your bills. Their opinions means nothing. I found my own guilt was worst than anything, it’s SO important to remind yourself daily that a happy, well adjusted mom is more important than breastfeeding, regardless if it is due to a medication incompatible with breastfeeding, a breast surgery or by choice. You are the only one who can make this decision and know what is best for your family.
If this will be your first baby, do you have any particular questions or concerns that more experienced moms might be able to answer?
I switched from Dr. Brown’s to Avent Classic. They have similar nipple shape and he did ok with them. As much as I love Dr. Brown’s bottles there are so many parts!
As as far as guilt, if your baby is being fed in any way, you have nothing to feel guilty for. Like others have said, make it known early on to your doctors and nurses that you are firm on formula feeding, regardless of your reasoning, and there shouldn’t be a problem. And honestly, if someone DOES give you a hard time, I would go above them (assuming it’s a nurse) and request that they no longer care for you if they’re not supportive.
I agree on the generic formulas- they are so much cheaper and just as good! I used UP&up (target) with both kids.
Also for drying up, pump/express just enough to relieve the pain.
To be clear, I'm not saying that you should BF or FF or FF only if all other options have been exhausted. I'm just saying that I don't want you to find out months later that there were other options and then be bummed out that you didn't actually get a chance to fully choose.
As for the judgement, unless it's someone who is genuinely trying to understand and educate themselves asking, I think a simple, "Why do you ask?" Or "Not a welcome topic of conversation" is just fine. No one has to justify their choice to anyone. Both have benefits. I like that bottle feeding gives partners and family more of an opportunity to take part in a sweet, snuggly activity. Other than baby giggles and smiles, nothing in parenting is perfect. It all has tradeoffs. You do you.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
Also yes.
@bettyvonsomethingstein @Gingermom15 @ShawnnaO @k318 @leilaquinn @kiki75 @heatherdubrow
Thanks so much for your thoughtful responses – I really appreciate the support being offered. I totally agree that how to feed is a personal choice needing no explanation, but I thought I’d mention the anti-depressant in case anyone has had a similar experience. It sounds like if I’m prepared to stand up for myself and my decision I shouldn’t face too much opposition from the hospital staff.
@kiki75 From what I’ve heard, Prozac is considered the SSRI that’s safest to use during pregnancy, and Zoloft is the best option for women who breastfeed, but you’re right that I’m concerned about making a medication change right when I’m most susceptible to postpartum depression. Obviously this warrants a more in-depth conversation with my OB and possibly my psychiatrist as well. I’ve always assumed I wouldn’t be able to breastfeed, but if it’s safe I wouldn’t be wholly opposed to trying.
I hope it doesn’t seem like this whole thread is about me and my particular situation. While the advice is most welcome I certainly didn’t mean to monopolize the discussion…
I know its not Prozac, but wanted to tell you if you don’t want to push breastfeeding entirely off the table, you may have options, though I don’t suggest switching medications at the last minute. Maybe sit down with your doctor and a lactation specialist and get their thoughts/advice if you have interest in attempting nursing.
If not— don’t! Your baby, your choice, as long as you are loving on that baby, feeding baby, and caring for baby, it doesn’t matter how baby is fed. Do what is best for you.
I felt like a failure with DS and cried about it for a couple days because I felt so pressured by the hospital personnel. My mom reminded me that all that matters is a healthy baby with a full belly whether it came from me or a bottle. If you feel like this is your path be strong about it and go with it. Don't let others bully you or make you feel like a bad mom because you aren't breast feeding.
Why are you choosing to formula feed, if you're comfortable saying? Like @Cowboycorgi , I currently plan on attempting to breastfeed, but if it doesn't go well, I will happily make the move to formula. There are a million reasons I think formula feeding would be the better option for my family and me. TTC, dealing with multiple losses, and being pregnant has meant that for the past year and a half, EVERYTHING has hinged on my body. For my sanity's sake, I look forward to my body being MINE again. My husband and I plan on sharing the responsibilities of parenting as evenly as possible, and I hate that breastfeeding is an act that only I can do (I know pumping and bottle feeding is an option; it still doesn't fly without me!). And however it may sound, I hear so many horror stories about the painful process people experience when trying to breastfeed: again, after the year and a half we've had, I just want to enjoy my daughter and husband. If breastfeeding comes easily to us, great! But I'm not going to dread providing nourishment for my kid every day when I could just as well give her a bottle.
What formula do you plan on using (subject to change of course if allergies present)? Currently, I'm leaning towards Enfamil Premium, but this is based on research I did months ago and have largely forgotten. I need to look into it further.
STM/TTM – any tips on drying up your milk supply after delivery? Good question!
Please share how you dealt (or are planning to deal) with judgement and guilt. At the end of the day, it's about making the right choice for my child. Of course her physical health is extremely important to me, and I know the benefits that seem to be associated with breastfeeding. But mental and emotional health matter too, and if bottle-feeding functions better for our family, baby will be better off for it! Will I give that explanation to everyone who is judge-y? No. They will get responses that tend to feature four letters.
If this will be your first baby, do you have any particular questions or concerns that more experienced moms might be able to answer? Not yet!
I used Similac with my first but haven’t really decided this time. His pediatrician always told me that they are pretty much all the same. I mean obviously except for the special ones.
I didn’t really have any judgement that I know of with my first with this one, well I am doing whats best for me and my family and that’s all that matters.
Not planning, but anticipating it because breastfeeding with my first did not happen
What formula do you plan on using (subject to change of course if allergies present)?
I think Enfamil gentle-ease is what worked best for us last time
STM/TTM – any tips on drying up your milk supply after delivery?
Please share how you dealt (or are planning to deal) with judgement and guilt.
No guilt from me here no matter what others say, I think fed is best and my first is an overall healthy, thriving child. I beat myself up so badly the first round and not being able to breastfeed, but life went on and I've healed and since met a lot who've had the same experience.