The refinishing crap we bought for the baby dresser didn't work like it was supposed to so now we have to start over and I'm angry about it because it was the one nursery related thing I wanted to get done over the weekend.
I just got our call log from last week and the other girl that was supposed to be in our work group only answered half the calls that I did and the same amount rolled over to the next group and that really annoys me. I thought it was just extra busy because the two other people in the group were at a conference but nope, turns out it's because the other person decided not to answer or not to log in while I was getting slammed.
Pregnancy insomnia...that is all. I am wondering what to do when it hits on work nights? I contemplated going downstairs and doing dishes or something because I was wide awake, but I feared that would keep me up the rest of the night and it was only 1:30am. Ugh! Today is also slightly rainy and gloomy so it did not make the situation any better. Thank God for coffee this AM.
The same hospital system that swamped me last weekend sent EVEN MORE requests this weekend. They are not careful about making sure they differentiate between their various service locations, and I'm planning to be a bitch today about denying requests that aren't properly submitted. I'm sorry, if you're going to send me 400 requests over a weekend, you can be damn well sure you're submitting them from the right service location.
currently 50 minutes into my 3 hour glucose test. My ass is already falling asleep. And they took 45 minutes to give me the stupid drink (which was gross, btw, much worse than the original) I had to take a full day off of work to do this so at least I'll get the afternoon to hang out with DD.
Realized this morning that I bought shampoo instead of conditioner (as I was putting it on my hair). I guess that explains why the bigger bottle was the same price. Hellooooo, frizzy hair. Haha
@gusgus14 I basically could have written your post.
MBF as always, is work. I don't know if it is because I am pregnant or what, but I hate my job and half the people with whom I work. I'm so over it, so I am more or less not doing work I should be doing and it is piling up, which is annoying. However, the only way I could fix that would be by actually DOING the work, and I hate my job and don't want to do it... so... MBF it is
My MBF goes to the weather. Just saw the winter weather forecast this year is hot and dry which totally sucks. I hate when we skip winter I could totally go for some of that "rainy and gloomy" that @jaclyn0405 was talking about. Send it my way please!
@EmilyLove25 solidarity, sister! I'm in that same cycle, too where I have work that's piling up but I'm just over it so I'm not doing it. This is about the time of year I need to start working ahead so things aren't a total dumpster fire when I'm out but I just can't.
MBF...is all things wedding. DH is part of a wedding in the middle of November. I'll be just shy of 32 weeks and it's a destination wedding for all attending (except bride and groom who are able to drive the 5 hours). We are spending over a grand between cross country flights and a rental vehicle alone nevermind DH's suit, gift, travel expenses for dining, etc. Bride decides she wants her family and the bridal party to all stay in a giant mountain home that costs nearly $5000 for the week. She assumes everyone is staying and breaks the costs down. Over $200 per person per evening is the first estimate. Fine for singles, right...but DH and I pay double to share the same space? So three nights would have totaled us another grand. No thank you with a baby on the way! So I found us an adorable AIRB&B for $185 for the entire weekend. She e-mails me this weekend to notify us we should have been more clear on where we were staying and that the right thing to do is cover at least $350+ expenses they'll lose by us not staying. Ooooookay, nope. I just told her I'm not getting into a financial dispute with her and that we will gladly cover what we can but that I was all set with the conversation and essentially hung up. Kicker: While visiting them this summer I witnessed her and MOB putting together fake floral arrangements and raving about how little they cost. All the tacky when you yourself are saving money but expecting others to shell out. This was supposed to be a fun BabyMoon for DH and I with my parents coming to stay with DS so we could enjoy a full adult weekend. Now I'm just turned off to the whole thing...
@myorke24 She should be happy you are even attending! Expecting everyone to stay in the same place and then expecting them to pay for it is a huge no no in my book. I wanted all my bridesmaids to stay with me the night before the wedding... and I shelled out the $$ for it. I wanted them with specific hair and makeup.. I was lucky that a good family friend did it as a gift, but if that hadn’t happened I would have paid. If you have high expectations as a bride you better expect to cough up some cash otherwise just have a backyard bbq (which looking back I probably would have loved more than I actually did lol)
@madcouplewithabox Yes! Couldn't agree more! A childhood friend owns a salon and I met with her ahead of time to ask what the cost would be for myself, the maids, MOH, and MIL to have hair and makeup done..while still making sure she would stay in HER budget since she'd be closed for a few hours of her Saturday to accommodate. We agreed on a number, and I saved to cover it myself as a gift (they also got embroidered sleep shirts for relaxing in during). I couldn't imagine picking a place to stay that I couldn't fully afford alone with my partner and expect others to essentially cover the cost. Not to mention, why even book without confirmed/received payment? After the fact collecting of dues is such a gamble. In addition, you don't even know which room you will be staying in! DH and I would have been last to arrive as well (we can only stay 3 nights versus 4 for everyone else as DH is military and is training until the night before we fly out). We would have been left with the last available space - who wants to pay hundreds and hundreds for that?! We both agreed other than my oldest and dearest friend who will likely be engaged in the coming year or two, we are declining any further wedding involvement. The expectations involved just continue to become more unreasonable .
@BelhurstBride Ugh. The whole thing is really upsetting (could be the extra girl hormones swirling around at this stage of the game, ha!). Not the cost but the fact that even as friends, she went "there" almost immediately. DH and I are very reasonable and fair people. I've been where she is. A month out from wedding day, everyone is expecting payment, stress, etc. but if she had simply said "Oh no, I assumed you were with us! Wish you'd more clearly explained your accommodation intentions. This puts us in a tough spot." I would have apologized I wasn't more clear (re: I would have clearly said "No." when the idea was first mentioned versus "Send me the info to look it over.") We would have without hestitating offered what we could, no questions asked. But it was jumping right to the money issue and an expected amount at that that really just hurts and has us all turned off.
@myorke24 that is ridiculous and you don't need that drama right now. I agree with everyone that she should have stated the cost and collected money before booking that way she would have very clearly known who was in and who was out. To just assume everyone is in is just selfish and rude. It is an unrealistic expectation and it's the bride and groom's responsibility to communicate with the wedding party in advance if they want everyone to stay at the same place. They also need to be willing to cover the cost if they want to require everyone to stay at a certain place.
My MBF is people still not doing their timesheets correctly. I had a doctor's appointment this morning so I was approving timesheets in the waiting room on my phone. Two people didn't check their damn timesheets so I had to bother a coworker to go track them down at work. Seriously, I wish they had more consequences for not being responsible for their own timesheet but the company structure doesn't allow that. If I approve it with missing time punches it comes back on me not them. WTF they didn't check it and I think if on one paycheck they are missing time and they get paid for that time on the next paycheck when they correct the error that suddenly this wouldn't be an issue. It's a natural consequence. If my timesheet is incorrect it comes back on me, I don't have someone double-checking my timesheet. Damn irresponsible millennials (I'm shaking my cane at them)!
My MBF is that my skin has decided to rebel all of a sudden. I have acne like crazy and it just seriously came out of no where over the weekend. Last week, totally fine no issues. This weekend, crazy town acne party on my face.
Jan '18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies
@myorke24 the minute she put a specific figure out there, I wouldn't give her a damn cent unless she confirmed with you in advance that you were staying there. It's a lesson she can learn for the low cost of $350. Don't make assumptions - make offers. If they aren't accepted, adjust. If it isn't clear and it impacts the group, clarify. Also $200/person/night is a lot when there are alternatives. They should have evened that out for couples and singles so it was more fair for both.
You and your Dh obviously should do what you think is best, just wanted to chime in that I think there's a tactful way to handle it without chipping in. "Since we never confirmed we were staying with you, we won't be contributing financially to the lodging expense."
i know wedding planning is overwhelming, but if you can't be sure you can afford a scenario, get the info/confirmations first. also, destination weddings are so expensive. I had one, and I worked hard to find options that were affordable for others. I wanted it to be a relaxing getaway for those couples who wanted to do their own thing! That bride sounds like a nut. You're totally right that all she had to do was respond politely with surprise, and express a wish, not an expectation.
I hate being in weddings for that reason, @myorke24! People just expect too much out of you. The fact that you're paying $1000 just to get there is crazy to me! I have been a bridesmaid in two "destination" weddings, and both times, the bride paid for accommodations so we could all stay together. I thought that was kind of expected? My MBF is also work. Just the fact that I have to work after nine days of vacation is an MBF in and of itself! And to come back to sub notes telling me that one of my classes was terrible while I was gone is not how I wanted to start this Monday morning. I just chewed the class out. One student said, "Mrs. R, I've never seen you that mad!" Yeah, kid...because my glorious vacation is over, and you guys were jerks while I was gone. Of course I'm pissed!
@kelk5 that sucks that it comes back on you! Our director had enough of people not doing timesheets correctly, and said "if you don't do it right, you don't get paid". But he had the backup from Corperate.
As for me- My MBF is that a friend who said she was going to throw me a sprinkle when I first announced, even bought favors, and asked me for a list of names and email addresses (keep in mind that this was just to be a lunch thing at my fav Korean BBQ for 10 of us- including myself and her), and was working on it up until at least a month and a half ago.... apparently is no longer doing anything. She was even a bit pushy about wanting to throw me a little party.
The lunch was supposed to be on Nov 5th, and I asked her if she sent the invites, because one of the girls I wanted to be there said she hadn't gotten her invite yet. my friend said "No, sorry. Not gonna be able to do it now. But I could set up an online FB party for you, if you really want something, and I'll send you the few favors i got for it too".
Ummmmmm no. NO online party. That sounds ridiculous, and awful and very grabby (we're not asking for anything because we're set other than replacing a couple small items, and we will buy those). This was just supposed to be lunch!
And when the heck was she gonna tell me?? It's two weeks before it was supposed to happen! DH had to rearrange his work schedule to accommodate this in order to watch DD, (he's a nurse on 3rd shift in the ER), as well as a couple of the other friends I wanted to be there (who are also nurses) had to arrange their schedules.
Just seems rude to me, to not say anything about it.
@IrishPiratess even though it's not ideal... I would totally still have the lunch. I'd spread the word to your 10 people either via word of mouth or through a FB invite. If you aren't expected to bring a gift, a FB invite is acceptable. If they are expected to bring a gift (like a normal shower), a FB invite is seen as slightly rude to most. Younger generations aren't as bad about it, but anyone over the age of 40 would probably be turned off by an online invite asking for a gift.
The main objective is to have a "last hoorah" with your girls and they want to celebrate you. Even if it's poorly planned, it will still be appreciated by your friends and yourself to just relax and enjoy before the baby takes up more time. Go enjoy yourself!
Nurses commenting on weight gain !!! It pisses me off . My first pregnancy I gained 45 lbs and no one said a thing , I was healthy , baby was healthy all is well. I switched OB and at my first apt after finding out we were having twins she said that I should expect to gain 60 lbs ... cool no problem ... I have struggled with weight my entire life and after I had my daughter something hormonally must have switched because I lost 40 lbs on top of the 45 I gained and I was doing alll the same things I had done for the past 5 years and struggled with . I would step on the scale backwards at her apts because I didn't even want to know the number .... anyway I was feeling good about the fact that I was 27 weeks and had only gained 28 lbs with twins and my new nurse at my new high risk doctor had the nerve to tell me I need to watch my weight !! I feel like unless your are inadvertently putting your baby at harm because of excessive weight gain a nurse has no right to talk about that . She says " ya know it's going to be hard to get off after they are born " ... F U lady !! Why the heck would you care ?!?! I was so pissed off , some women have some seriously huge problems with body image and weight what gives you the right to solicited your advice if everyone is healthy ?? Oh and also you want me to eat a min of 2800 calories , be on bedrest and not gain weight ... yeah ok
ME... Since I'm on bedrest I placed an online grocery order. Went to pick it up... then went to the wrong location. I was already right at the end of my cutoff time and of course I didn't realize I was at the wrong one till I was parked and on the phone with the person to bring my order out.
@IrishPiratess even though it's not ideal... I would totally still have the lunch. *snip*
The main objective is to have a "last hoorah" with your girls and they want to celebrate you. Even if it's poorly planned, it will still be appreciated by your friends and yourself to just relax and enjoy before the baby takes up more time. Go enjoy yourself!
@IrishPiratess I was going to suggest this too. Although I'm highly opposed to one throwing themselves a shower, you could tell your friends something like this: "Hey, I know I told you [friend] was going to throw me a sprinkle but it no longer suits her. I'd love to still be able to spend a little time with you all before the business of a new baby. No gifts, please but come to the restaurant for a fun girl's lunch anyway!"
Oh, heck no, @ecolton01! I would have been irate too! I'm adding another MBF. This one goes out to another student. I brought pizza for lunch today (there is NO food in my fridge after being out of town). I have a group of students who hang out in my classroom during lunchtime. They keep to themselves, so it's NBD. Today, however, one of them saw me eating my pizza and said, "Mrs. R, that's not healthy. You shouldn't be eating that while pregnant." I just ignored her and continued browsing Amazon. Shut up, kid. And get off your high horse. I see that fried chicken sandwich (smothered in mayo) that you're eating.
@myorke24 oh heck no. NOPE NOPE NOPE. You don't get to dictate to people where they sleep and how much they spend. Wedding planning is stressful, but so is creating more problems for yourself by assuming things and then trying to get people to pay for them. @IrishPiratess I agree with @graceupongrace09 and @conineml about still getting together with people (maybe minus the girl who bailed on the planning)
my MBF is daycare. I talked to a friends sister who watches my friends twins about watching the tiny terrorist when he comes. She said yes, but that she was thinking of moving back home to OK when this school year is out as long as her sister can find childcare for the twins. I said ok, just keep me in the loop and when you decide for sure let me know so I know how hard I need to be looking for backup options. I hadn't talked to her for a bit and reached out last week....yea she decided 2 months ago to move back and just didn't tell me. I am pretty sure I have another one lined up but why didn't you tell me this 2 months ago when you decided so I could solidify someone to watch my baby when I have to go back to work????
My MBF is having to get out of bed this morning. Ugh - so tired after our busy weekend!
But now I feel like a B for complaining about it when some of you are on bedrest! Thinking of you @supercoolstephy@ecolton01 and probably others I'm forgetting about!
@ecolton01 that is ridiculous. It sounds like you are on track for twins and what the doctor told you to expect to gain!!!!! That nurse should have kept her mouth shut or given you a "you're doing so great with growing two babies!"
@JuliaGoolia719 that sucks, I hope you find someone or a center quickly. The day care center we are looking at said we should register before Christmas if we are looking to start in April. Good luck.
@cyanope lol to the last part. Also, now I want pizza for dinner tonight
@kelk5 the backup I found luckily will have an opening in May, so I have about 5 or 6 weeks I’ll need to cover but I think between my mom and step mom and my friends sister (she will still be in town) we can make it work. It’ll be interesting lol.
There is nothing worse than unsolicited comments on weight gain and what food we are eating. I applaud you ladies for keeping your calm. I’m not sure I would have been able to.
I retract my earlier MBF. I had spilled my drink on my sheets this morning, so I needed to wash them tonight. No big deal. As I was upstairs for literally two minutes tops, DD decided to have an accident all over the couch and carpet. “Mommy, I peed all over the couch!” Unfortunately, I’d already started the sheets and decided to bleach them, so I can’t toss DDs wet clothes in until the sheets are finished. Is it bed time, yet (mine, not hers)?
I am such a bitch today. This morning, one of my fave colleagues, came up to me asking, "how is baby?" her hand up was up like she was ready to cop a bump feel. I yelled, "don't touch me." Ugh. I really love her, and I feel so nasty. Tried to make ammends. Sigh.
Also, @cyanope these students and their opinions are really starting to annoy me too! Sorry, but you're 12. You have no comment! Ha.
Mine goes to recurring yeast infections (sorry, tmi).. ugh. I've been taking probiotics daily, limiting sugar, and using Rx cream to no avail. It'll kinda clear it up for a few days and then out of nowhere I'm bombarded with symptoms again. I feel like my vagina will never be normal until after I give birth (and I mean, well after I give birth). Wahhhhh. I didn't experience this problem at all with my first baby
I am such a bitch today. This morning, one of my fave colleagues, came up to me asking, "how is baby?" her hand up was up like she was ready to cop a bump feel. I yelled, "don't touch me." Ugh. I really love her, and I feel so nasty. Tried to make ammends. Sigh.
I haven't done this yet, but I have a feeling I'll have a moment where I do this too before LO gets here...
My MBF is this stupid mouse pad on this computer. Our laptop is almost as old as our marriage (6+ years) and its still kicking but the mousepad is so so overly sensitive. It takes 2x as long to type a post because the mousepad randomly picks up my hand hovering over it and clicks me into random other sentences! I've tried and tried to change the sensitivity but it makes no difference. We've got a wireless mouse but it keeps getting misplaced. Its nothing big but its aggravating.
January 2018 Board September Siggy Challenge: Fall
@sbishop426 With my son I think I had no less than three yeast infections -- you're not alone and it's awful. (With this one, my vag is just swampy and has turned all my underwear into Funk City. I bought new ones. It hasn't helped as much as I'd have hoped. I'm usually very positive about my private lady flower special fun zone, but ugh, I'm not feelin' super good about it lately.)
@sbishop426 With my son I think I had no less than three yeast infections -- you're not alone and it's awful. (With this one, my vag is just swampy and has turned all my underwear into Funk City. I bought new ones. It hasn't helped as much as I'd have hoped. I'm usually very positive about my private lady flower special fun zone, but ugh, I'm not feelin' super good about it lately.)
All the bold! Ugh, just call me the swamp monster already. And panty liners only make it worse... and God forbid it’s hot outside. I am a disgusting swamp monster. That is all.
... I baby powdered the whole zone hoping to reduce the horrible heat rash. And then I left a baby powder butt print on my dark red sheets that won't come off!
![[Deleted User]](https://core-api.thebump.com/core/v1/avatars/%5BDeleted%20User%5D)
Re: Monday Bitchfest
I'm super tired and grouchy.
I don't want to be at work.
The refinishing crap we bought for the baby dresser didn't work like it was supposed to so now we have to start over and I'm angry about it because it was the one nursery related thing I wanted to get done over the weekend.
I just got our call log from last week and the other girl that was supposed to be in our work group only answered half the calls that I did and the same amount rolled over to the next group and that really annoys me. I thought it was just extra busy because the two other people in the group were at a conference but nope, turns out it's because the other person decided not to answer or not to log in while I was getting slammed.
I want to go back to bed.
MBF as always, is work. I don't know if it is because I am pregnant or what, but I hate my job and half the people with whom I work. I'm so over it, so I am more or less not doing work I should be doing and it is piling up, which is annoying. However, the only way I could fix that would be by actually DOING the work, and I hate my job and don't want to do it... so... MBF it is
DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015
DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017
BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019
BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020
DD2 8.22.13
MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18
as DH is military and is training until
the night before we fly out). We would have been left with the last available space - who wants to pay hundreds and hundreds for that?! We both agreed other than my oldest and dearest friend who will likely be engaged in the coming year or two, we are declining any further wedding involvement. The expectations involved just continue to become
more unreasonable .
Jan '18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies
You and your Dh obviously should do what you think is best, just wanted to chime in that I think there's a tactful way to handle it without chipping in. "Since we never confirmed we were staying with you, we won't be contributing financially to the lodging expense."
i know wedding planning is overwhelming, but if you can't be sure you can afford a scenario, get the info/confirmations first. also, destination weddings are so expensive. I had one, and I worked hard to find options that were affordable for others. I wanted it to be a relaxing getaway for those couples who wanted to do their own thing! That bride sounds like a nut. You're totally right that all she had to do was respond politely with surprise, and express a wish, not an expectation.
My MBF is also work. Just the fact that I have to work after nine days of vacation is an MBF in and of itself! And to come back to sub notes telling me that one of my classes was terrible while I was gone is not how I wanted to start this Monday morning. I just chewed the class out. One student said, "Mrs. R, I've never seen you that mad!" Yeah, kid...because my glorious vacation is over, and you guys were jerks while I was gone. Of course I'm pissed!
As for me- My MBF is that a friend who said she was going to throw me a sprinkle when I first announced, even bought favors, and asked me for a list of names and email addresses (keep in mind that this was just to be a lunch thing at my fav Korean BBQ for 10 of us- including myself and her), and was working on it up until at least a month and a half ago.... apparently is no longer doing anything. She was even a bit pushy about wanting to throw me a little party.
The lunch was supposed to be on Nov 5th, and I asked her if she sent the invites, because one of the girls I wanted to be there said she hadn't gotten her invite yet. my friend said "No, sorry. Not gonna be able to do it now. But I could set up an online FB party for you, if you really want something, and I'll send you the few favors i got for it too".
Ummmmmm no. NO online party. That sounds ridiculous, and awful and very grabby (we're not asking for anything because we're set other than replacing a couple small items, and we will buy those). This was just supposed to be lunch!
And when the heck was she gonna tell me?? It's two weeks before it was supposed to happen! DH had to rearrange his work schedule to accommodate this in order to watch DD, (he's a nurse on 3rd shift in the ER), as well as a couple of the other friends I wanted to be there (who are also nurses) had to arrange their schedules.
Just seems rude to me, to not say anything about it.
@IrishPiratess even though it's not ideal... I would totally still have the lunch. I'd spread the word to your 10 people either via word of mouth or through a FB invite. If you aren't expected to bring a gift, a FB invite is acceptable. If they are expected to bring a gift (like a normal shower), a FB invite is seen as slightly rude to most. Younger generations aren't as bad about it, but anyone over the age of 40 would probably be turned off by an online invite asking for a gift.
The main objective is to have a "last hoorah" with your girls and they want to celebrate you. Even if it's poorly planned, it will still be appreciated by your friends and yourself to just relax and enjoy before the baby takes up more time. Go enjoy yourself!
J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies
I'm adding another MBF. This one goes out to another student. I brought pizza for lunch today (there is NO food in my fridge after being out of town). I have a group of students who hang out in my classroom during lunchtime. They keep to themselves, so it's NBD. Today, however, one of them saw me eating my pizza and said, "Mrs. R, that's not healthy. You shouldn't be eating that while pregnant." I just ignored her and continued browsing Amazon. Shut up, kid. And get off your high horse. I see that fried chicken sandwich (smothered in mayo) that you're eating.
@myorke24 oh heck no. NOPE NOPE NOPE. You don't get to dictate to people where they sleep and how much they spend. Wedding planning is stressful, but so is creating more problems for yourself by assuming things and then trying to get people to pay for them.
@IrishPiratess I agree with @graceupongrace09 and @conineml about still getting together with people (maybe minus the girl who bailed on the planning)
my MBF is daycare. I talked to a friends sister who watches my friends twins about watching the tiny terrorist when he comes. She said yes, but that she was thinking of moving back home to OK when this school year is out as long as her sister can find childcare for the twins. I said ok, just keep me in the loop and when you decide for sure let me know so I know how hard I need to be looking for backup options. I hadn't talked to her for a bit and reached out last week....yea she decided 2 months ago to move back and just didn't tell me. I am pretty sure I have another one lined up but why didn't you tell me this 2 months ago when you decided so I could solidify someone to watch my baby when I have to go back to work????
Together Let Us Seek the Heights
@supercoolstephy yay team bedrest!!! Not
But now I feel like a B for complaining about it when some of you are on bedrest!
@JuliaGoolia719 that sucks, I hope you find someone or a center quickly. The day care center we are looking at said we should register before Christmas if we are looking to start in April. Good luck.
@cyanope lol to the last part. Also, now I want pizza for dinner tonight
Together Let Us Seek the Heights
I retract my earlier MBF. I had spilled my drink on my sheets this morning, so I needed to wash them tonight. No big deal. As I was upstairs for literally two minutes tops, DD decided to have an accident all over the couch and carpet. “Mommy, I peed all over the couch!” Unfortunately, I’d already started the sheets and decided to bleach them, so I can’t toss DDs wet clothes in until the sheets are finished. Is it bed time, yet (mine, not hers)?
Also, @cyanope these students and their opinions are really starting to annoy me too! Sorry, but you're 12. You have no comment! Ha.
BFP: May 6, 2017 EDD: Jan. 13, 2018
My MBF is this stupid mouse pad on this computer. Our laptop is almost as old as our marriage (6+ years) and its still kicking but the mousepad is so so overly sensitive. It takes 2x as long to type a post because the mousepad randomly picks up my hand hovering over it and clicks me into random other sentences! I've tried and tried to change the sensitivity but it makes no difference. We've got a wireless mouse but it keeps getting misplaced. Its nothing big but its aggravating.