Currently BFing moms check-in

lindsye · September 2017

So I realize this likely will not be a huge check-in group, but for those of us who are now pregnant and still breastfeeding....

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?

ladythrice · September 2017

@Lindsye you read my mind! I was totally going to start this today!!

ladythrice · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
DD is BFing, she's 14 months.

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
No effect for me so far, but I didn't have any with DS either so I'm not too surprised.

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
Yes, definitely yes. Like exclusive pumping mommas, I have all the admiration for tandem nursers, but its just not for me.

I follow the "don't offer, don't refuse" weaning method. If she asks (signs milk and says 'nu nu') then we'll nurse. She's at daycare during the day so it facilitates day weaning. We pretty much only nurse before bed at night, sometimes naps on weekends, and occasionally in the mornings if she's tired and needs snuggles. DS weaned around 16 months, I have a feeling we're on track for close to that with DD. Although... DS used a paci and that helped him wean sooner... DD doesn't but she loves nursing to sleep... but doesn't need me to sleep, she'll fall asleep on DH no prob... but I like the sleepy snuggles, but she'll likely demand to nurse to sleep for quite a while. We shall see.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
Nope, probably not. I might start pumping sooner but I did that with DD and then our deep freeze lost power and I lost my stash (thankfully she was 11 months) and that sucked sooooo bad.

-CURRENT ANXIETY (I'm adding one lol)
I'm so freaking nervous about the next baby and having BFing struggles!!!! With DS we had all the issues but with DD we had none because, experience and education. However, neither of my kids have had physical issues (other than weak sucks). Not tongue/lip ties, no poor latches, etc. This past weekend I got SUPER anxious about #3 having all these issues and what happens if I can't breastfeed and its such an important thing to me and freaking pregnancy making me freak out... /sigh

lindsye · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
DS, 16 months

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
my supply has definitely tanked, likely in large part because I'm not able to keep up with my liquids consumption. Drinking enough water every day without getting sick is such a challenge - hopefully it will get better in a couple weeks. My son is unhappy about lower supply but otherwise seems unaffected (by changes in taste, etc)

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
I really hope he will self wean before baby is born, because I do not see myself tandem nursing; however, weaning him before he's ready would be so hard. Both my older DDs were ready by 18 months so I am sincerely hoping it will be the same for him, but zero signs of readiness whatsoever so far, lol.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
I really NEED to introduce a bottle earlier next time. Both of my last two kids would never take a bottle (even of breastmilk); my first would because we needed to supplement in the very beginning. Being attached at the boob to your kid for 18 months is a beatdown. DH and I haven't had any sort of solo vacation in years so yeah, baby #4 needs to be cool with a bottle.

riversdoctor · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) bfing
30 months
-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
nope. He’s nursing for shorter periods of time though. Usually 3-4 mornings a week and before bed most nights.
-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
I don’t plan to push anything but I also expect he will quit on his own like his sister did.
-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
get ties evaluated by a knowledgeable provider ASAP! (I’m tempted to get on her schedule before baby is born!) seriously best $600 I ever spent was on his revision!
Also I need to figure out the daycare battle. With my son whenever another baby had a bottle he needed one too. To preserve supply I stick to Kellymom principles of 1oz per hour of separation. They were constantly hounding me to send more milk which I didn’t want to do.

riversdoctor · September 2017

lindsye said:

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
DS, 16 months

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
my supply has definitely tanked, likely in large part because I'm not able to keep up with my liquids consumption. Drinking enough water every day without getting sick is such a challenge - hopefully it will get better in a couple weeks. My son is unhappy about lower supply but otherwise seems unaffected (by changes in taste, etc)

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
I really hope he will self wean before baby is born, because I do not see myself tandem nursing; however, weaning him before he's ready would be so hard. Both my older DDs were ready by 18 months so I am sincerely hoping it will be the same for him, but zero signs of readiness whatsoever so far, lol.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
I really NEED to introduce a bottle earlier next time. Both of my last two kids would never take a bottle (even of breastmilk); my first would because we needed to supplement in the very beginning. Being attached at the boob to your kid for 18 months is a beatdown. DH and I haven't had any sort of solo vacation in years so yeah, baby #4 needs to be cool with a bottle.

Kellymom.com has tons of great advice for bottles. Know that it’s normal to refuse especially when you’re around plus it’s even normal to refuse bottles when they’ve taken them without issues all along! Some kiddos do great with an open soppy cup held by caregiver, some need an eye dropper but it’s 100% baby preference and know that there’s likely not much you could have done to prevent the refusal with your older kiddos!!

julzy · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
26 months

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
I'm definitely feeling the pressure to wean because of the nipple pain and nursing aversion.

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
I'd like to wean but I'm so damn tired I end up giving in because it's so much easier to get him to nap and go to sleep for the night when nursing.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
we're still co-sleeping which orginally started because of night feeding I'd like to break this at 1 with the new baby but we'll see! I also wasn't comfortable with DS sleeping in another room because of first time mom jitters.

lindsye · September 2017

@julzy it is a battle royale to get my son to sleep if I don't nurse him before sleep. I totally hear you on the fatigue thing - I know I need to break the dependence but I certainly don't have the energy to do it right now.

julzy · September 2017

Ugh yes, @lindsyet. I'm hoping by next month I'll have a little more energy for it. We don't nurse during the day anymore so it's just nap and bedtime but I feel like they're the absolute hardest to break. Plus I also feel a little guilty because I know this new baby is going to be such a big change for him. I'm going to attempt nap time first once I start feeling better. Good luck, mama! The struggle is real.

mountainsmama · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
17 months

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
Not really, except my nipples are sore which is making me more interested in weaning sooner rather than later

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
Ugh YES. Right now she nurses at night and in the morning and she's pretty into it. It's hard to figure out how to stop. I've stopped nursing her if she wakes up at night and that leads to a crying battle every time, so I'm not looking forward to the same at bedtime. Any advice? I'd like her to wean on her own time, but I also want to give us several months without BFing so she doesn't think she "owns" the boobs when the baby comes.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
We thankfully had a pretty easy time of it (I mean, it was super painful and takes over your life but her latch was good and she gained weight like a pro wrestler). I hope we get that lucky again.

lindsye · September 2017

@mountainsmama I am having the same night struggle with my son right now - if I go in but don't nurse him, he gets furious. I have been trying to reduce the number of times I night feed him to get him out of the habit, so I've been having my husband go in one or two times a night to help him break the habit. It's working.

As for weaning, with my older girls they showed clear signs of readiness around 15-18 months - pushing my breast away, very short feedings, little interest. Once I saw any indication of readiness, I cut out feedings one by one and it really wasn't an issue. With my son, though... I'm becoming convinced he might happily nurse to 18.

geojaminee · September 2017

I'm just gonna throw this in here because I don't know where else to put it.
My DD is 19 months, we stopped BFing 2 months ago (it was actually 4th of July was the last time we nursed). I wasn't pregnant yet. But I still have colostrum! Like I don't know if it actually is colostrum, or if it just looks like it, but I really thought that getting pregnant would make the last of it dry up- it hasn't. My MW said I might just have that, like until menopause o.O

lindsye · September 2017

@bagowater mine never goes away either, although I have been nursing for the past 5 years with ~6 month breaks in between kids. It might last until menopause? Ugh no thank you.

ladythrice · September 2017

Yeah, when I was pregnant with DD I regularly leaked colostrum... but it was towards the end of my pregnancy. DS nursed until 16 months. DD was born when he was 19 months. TMI warning... In the last month my nipples were constantly covered in colostrum. It was gross and I showered so often just to clean the crust off my boobs. /sigh.

dirtyboots · September 2017

age(s) of kid(s) BFing? Almost 14 months

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far? Oh my goodness my nipples hurt. Like gritting my teeth every time he nurses. My supply has dropped significantly so in turn he has been asking to nurse less. He nurses 2-4 times a day, luckily he doesn't like to nurse to sleep, I just feed when he asks.

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?) right now I'm just following his lead. It's just been the last month that he's dropped from around 8 feeding a day down to what he's at now, so I think we're heading in that general direction and we still have 6 months to go.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?Not freak out so much about not having chunky baby and not making enough milk.

rmmorris · September 2017

I sort of belong! I just weaned by 15 month old because I started taking diclegis for morning sickness. This pregnancy was a surprise (was breastfeeding and still hadn't had a period) so I am having mixed emotions about weaning way before I thought I'd have to.

With new baby I hope breastfeeding comes more naturally this time around and I can just relax and enjoy those newborn months. I was such an anxious mess the first time around because breastfeeding was so much harder than I thought it would be. Also I'm nervous how breastfeeding will workout with a busy toddler.

ladythrice · September 2017

@rmmorris, welcome! Sorry to hear about having to wean before you felt ready. That must be really tough. Please feel free to hang here with us! I was really nervous when my second was born about how DS would handle a new baby nursing and getting cuddles when he was busy and wanted attention. He adjusted really well and quite quickly. I think most toddlers do.

ivdr · September 2017

-age(s) of kid(s) BFing?
DS is 23 months and still bfing

-has pregnancy affected BFing for you or your child at all so far?
My nipples have been so damn sore! My supply has also decreased since about 5wks. That hasn't stopped my little one though!

-do you plan to wean before new baby is born? (If so, when/how? If not, do you plan to tandem nurse?)
Definately wanting to wean well before the new baby is born. In the ideal situation, I would love it if my son self weaned. But the plan is 5 mths.....6mths max! He still nurses at night and I have started to cut back. He no longer nurses during the daytime.

-if you plan to nurse the new baby, will you do anything different next time?
I am hoping to be able to put my new baby down to sleep, without having to nurse them to fall asleep (sleep associations gah!!)

kclouds · September 2017

Still BFing my almost three year old here (three at the end of November)
I’d love to stop as soon as possible and I hope my decreasing supply will help that along.
Right now we’re down to just nap time and in the early morning before I’m ready to be awake (like 5-6am). I could stop those sessions, but I really, really love the extra sleep it allows me.
Went through the same thing with my first at 2.5 yrs old when I was pregnant and he woke up at 4am and 5am for months. So I’d really like to avoid that.
I don’t plan on doing much different this time except hopefully not becoming so dependent on nursing in the middle of the night as a means to get baby to sleep. It’s such an easy habit to fall into.

lindsye · September 2017

@ivdr and @kclouds I totally hear you on the sleep association thing. I do believe that BFing is a powerful and wonderful tool to calm a newborn (even to sleep) in the early days, but I too am guilty of allowing it to continue into toddlerhood. Maybe next time I'll get it right....

ladythrice · September 2017

Dude... I'm the one that takes TOTAL advantage of the ability to chill a baby with boob in the mouth... at anytime day/night. These first few years are survival... Gotta do what you gotta do!

julzy · October 2017

My 2 year old cried during nap time today as he was trying to nurse and said "empty." I felt so bad I couldn't hold back the tears. I've been saying I want him to wean but my goodness I'm also feeling really emotional about it. It's really been this incredible bonding thing between us and I'm sad it looks like it might be finally coming to an end.

lindsye · October 2017

I'm sorry, @julzy. It is such an extremely emotional issue. With my older children, as my supply has dropped as pregnancy progressed my children have naturally lost interest, which was emotional in its own way but also made me feel better about it. I'm sorry for the sadness.

rmmorris · October 2017

@julzy I teared up reading that. Unexpected weaning is so hard.

knottie17a55d70cef85b98 · October 2017

I love that this thread was started! It's so nice to know that I am not alone! I am the only one among my friends who has nursed beyond a year!

Still nursing my 21 month old boy.

I am having some soreness which I think my son is picking up on because he has stopped wanting milk before nap so we are down to when he wakes up and before bed. It feels a little bittersweet to be almost done nursing my baby.

I think we will likely be done nursing by the time the new babe arrives. I am not opposed to tandem nursing though so we will just see how it all goes. I told myself that I will make a decision after he turns 2 in Dec.

At this point, I don't think I'll do anything differently as far as breastfeeding goes with the next babe. I think I'll just have to see how things go this time.

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