FTM questions for STM+ 9/19

whiska · September 2017

Questions for moms who have BTDT!

Let's post the next one at the beginning of October.

balletnerd · September 2017

Ok STM- what should I prep for postnatal care? I feel like this isn't talked about enough. Stock up on pads? Ice packs? Etc... what helped you?

lavashiner · September 2017

@balletnerd I stocked up on some stuff, but then was happy to find that my hospital sent me home with a bunch of stuff (some I used, some I didn't) including:

tucks pads for hemorrhoids (yes, please)
long ice pads (I never needed these, but I didn't have any tearing)
heavy duty pads (but I got my own since I have particular preferences in regards to pads)
a can of dermoplast (didn't need this)
two squeezy water bottles so you don't have to wipe the first couple of days (I found I could gently pat, which was better for me that drenching the whole area)
disposable underwear (I just used my own underwear which I found to be comfier--I didn't have too much bleeding)
800 mg ibuprofen (yes, please)

I would recommend getting bamboobies or some other reusable breast pads so when you finally do sleep for a longer stretch, you don't make a huge mess. the disposable ones never felt right to me, and the bamboo ones are so nice and soft. Make sure you have a nursing bra that is comfy enough to sleep in and can house the nursing pads!

I also got myself a new robe and pjs that I could easily nurse in. It was nice to have some new lounge wear since I was doing a lot of lounging.

Also, if you have a close friend or family member that can make sure there is a meal waiting for you when you get home from the hospital, that would be amazing. My sister left a bunch of food for us including a great dinner and dessert (we left the hospital around 6pm) and it was such a nice surprise!!! At the very least have something nourishing in your fridge/freezer that you can make quickly. Come to think of it, I think she and my mom also tidied up our house for us so we didn't come home to whatever sorry state we left it.

balletnerd · September 2017

@lavashiner Awesome Tips! Thank you!!

kyrwyn · September 2017

What are the best baby care brands for sensitive skin? Even as an adult, I have to wash all of my clothes in dye-free, fragrance-free detergents and carefully choose my hair/skin care products. I'm guessing our little guy will be sensitive too -- and even if he's not, I may not be able to use most baby products on him because I'd have to touch them. What have you found to be the best baby bath care products/brands for sensitive skin? Diapers? What other surprises have I probably not thought about on this front?

I'm also trying to find as much natural-fibers as possible for baby clothes. Not because I'm particularly crunchy, but because I get hives from most synthetics and wouldn't wish that on an infant.

kaylawing · September 2017

@kyrwyn I have liked Babo Diaper cream. We've avoided any major rashes using this each night. Bambo Diapers have also been great for us and I've heard great things about water wipes, but have only used them a couple times (they are pricey).

@balletnerd great question. I second what has already been said above, but wanted to add my own:
-this bra. Super comfy so I could sleep in it and easy to nurse in. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MSWFMXZ/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_7kxWzbRGPABA6
-lots of nursing friendly lounge clothes. Most days I just wore a nursing tank top, leggings, and a tsbirt.
-snacks! Nursing made me hungry/thirsty but nothing sounded good. I found having granola bars, fruit, and other small snacks around areas I nursed helped me to eat more.
- the water spray bottle they have in the hospital was a lifesaver. I took it home and purchased a second one.
-This seems silly, but a notebook or app or some other way of keeping track of your meds. I was on a pain killer(or two?), stool softener, and vitamin and you're so tired that it's easy to forget when you took what. My dh made a little chart to write it all down and it was helpful when we were both sleep deprived.
-long pads. The hospital sends you home with some, but I needed more.

I am sure I'll remember more later.

splsmama2016 · September 2017

I stocked up on the disposable undies only because I had ZERO desire to wash out blood soaked panties. I also bought a pack of the perineal ice pack/pad combos (CVS/Walgreens), dermoplast, tucks pads (didn't feel like making padcicles with witch hazel). Most of these you can get on Amazon (undies for sure) but you can also get them at a drug store.

Milkies Milk Savers!! It's a milk collector you put in your bra on the side you're not nursing off of, and it collects whatever milk comes out. I was losing upwards of 2-3oz every nursing session in the beginning until I found this thing.

@kyrwyn Dreft makes a detergent that is dye and fragrance free. I've used a sample of it and, as someone with sensitive skin myself, it was nice. I have bad eczema flair ups so we use All free and clear for us. But for DD1, we've been using regular Dreft and she's had zero issues, and neither have I when I've thrown in some of my things with her laundry. TBH, we could be using any regular free and clear detergent for her, but I'm addicted to the smell of her laundry lol.

Also try Burts Bees clothing. Super soft, natural fibers, and really cute. I was the same way and wanted only the best for her, but the easiest way for me to pick out her things when she was little was by feeling the materials. If it's soft to my touch, i was ok with it. Carters baby basics, Gerber too. If something felt cheap and crunchy to the touch, I didn't buy it, or I returned it.

i kept a case of water next to my nursing "station", along with snacks (high protein, calorie filled snacks like mixed nuts, granola bars, fiber one bars, etc).

Epsom salts/Sitz bath salts! Depending on vaginal vs c section, you should buy a bag. I added a few drops of lavender essential oil to my baths and I swear it helped heal my lady bits. Ask your dr first because not every dr has the same mind set.

skc040512 · September 2017

For PP care, get a good (read: comfortable)nursing bra, and breast pads for sure. Things like the mesh panties, dermoplast, heavy pads, tuck pads, spray bottles for your lady bits, and even some diapers, wipes and blankets can be swiped from the hospital. Have your nurse or CNA bring you extra. My CNAs were awesome and would constantly be stuffing extra supplies into my bag. Which turned out to be excellent because DD was TINY and we only had one small pack of NB diapers at home, but we got like 80 diapers from our stay.

For sensitive baby skin, Aveeno unscented is the way to go. DD1 has very sensitive skin, and that and Dove unscented are the only things we can use. They add in a ton of moisture without greasing the baby up, or dousing them in chemicals. I'd also recommend using a detergent YOU like for LO. Switching from a dye-and-fragarence free one to a standard one will actually leave chemicals on baby's clothes since not all of the soap gets washed out of the washer every time. We use All Free & Clear on all of our laundry, and dryer balls instead of fabric softener or dryer sheets It makes laundry sooo much easier because if you miss something of baby's, you can always throw it in with your clothes, too!

Edited for typos

ab920 · September 2017

I legit cannot emphasize the importance of the following that @lavashiner mentioned:

tucks pads (I bought the economy-sized containers, at least one in each bathroom)
heavy duty pads
a can of dermoplast (I bought two four packs and that was enough. it may seem excessive but my tear wasn't healed until 9 weeks PP)
two squeezy water bottles (You can buy them cheap on Amazon...I had like 3 in each bathroom)

I bought big, comfy undies from Target that I wore for the entire PP period. Also, I suggest doing the "padsicles"-->Witch hazel, aloe mixture lathered on the pad then frozen. It felt SO good on my tear and helped tremendously.

maddilatti · September 2017

@balletnerd Dermoplast! Can't say it enough. If you don't tear them it may not be as necessary but it was a life saver for me. I bought some like two sizes too big granny panties for post partum that I tossed once it was over that came in real handy when your wearing a pad the size of a boat! The nurses at my hospital seriously hooked me up before I left (befriend your nurses), and sent me home with a whole extra package of the mesh underwear they give you post delivery. These are magical and the best thing ever!

failuretofly · September 2017

In addition to all the suggestions above, I was so thankful I bought a pack of tena adult diapers. They came in extremely handy when my water broke before I went into labor (you keep making amniotic fluid so you will continuously leak after your water breaks) and I used them for the first day or two for the heavier bleeding.

whiska · September 2017

@failuretofly Thanks for that rec! How many do you recommend buying? Did you get the underwear (pull up like pants) or briefs (fastens like a diaper)?

cait5413 · September 2017

@balletnerd I stocked up on a lot of the recommended stuff and then didn't use most of it because I had a c-section, not a vaginal delivery. The stuff you will need regardless: Colace and super-absorbent pads. I also bought some knock-off Depends in case my water broke (it didn't) so I could wear a pair on the way to the hospital, but some people use those instead of pads at first. The tip about reusable breast pads is good--I bought some bamboo ones on Amazon. I liked them better than Bamboobies. They were not as silky-soft, but thicker and felt more absorbent to me (and cheaper). Nursing tanks and nursing bras to sleep in are helpful. I never sleep in a bra, but your boobs are so big/engorged/leaky, it can be uncomfortable to sleep without them. Snacks and water bottles stashed throughout the house (wherever you may be nursing or stuck with a sleeping baby on you) are key.

@kyrwyn DD does not have particularly sensitive skin, so I really only worried about washing--All Free & Clear is great and so much cheaper than Dreft. Water wipes are also good if you want disposable wipes (some people with very sensitive babies or environmental concerns just use wet cloths instead of disposable wipes) and the Seventh Generation wipes are nice and thick and work well, but both of these brands are expensive, so I usually only buy them on sale and mostly use Huggies wipes. We use Pampers and Up and Up diapers for DD with no problems, but I think this depends on the baby--some will just have a reaction with a certain brand. I would give Honest a bit of a side-eye since they have recently had to pay customers from a lawsuit that showed their completely "natural, xyz-free" diapers actually contained a bunch of chemicals they said they didn't contain. As I may have mentioned before, I liked the Seventh Generation coconut care (coconut oil-based), but DD didn't like it. I think she had an aversion to the smell? She would always cry when I used it, but she didn't have an allergic reaction or anything. If you are really sensitive, I would think products that work for you should be gentle enough for baby.

failuretofly · September 2017

@whiska I got the stretchy underwear style ones

darkfyre · September 2017

@kyrwyn I really liked Whole Foods 365 powder detergent. No dyes or fragrances and gets the cloth diapers Clean. My fav lotion is CJ's Butter. It is a bit pricey but a little goes a long way and it works for everything. It has all good grade ingredients so if you like she's butter you could even eat it. Comes in unscented or essential oil varieties. They also have a Plus that is death to thrush/yeast. My go to is their lavender & tea tree.
Other than that I recommend really limiting bathing to 1 or 2 times a week. Especially if eczema is a concern. Baby skin really doesn't need much. Just a gentle wipe with a damp clothe is enough most of the time.

wabash15 · September 2017

@kyrwyn I also have super sensitive skin and suspect my kiddos do as well. We use 7th generation for laundry soap (but I have been able to use any free and clear product). as for soaps honnest brand body wash/shampoo has been really good, no reactions for me or them. in terms of diapers.. we cloth diaper but when we have to use disposables we like 7th generation the best. (honnest brand are good too they are just more $$, there is also babyganics but we felt like they were not as absorbent as the 7th generation). For wipes we have either used 7th generation or the target unscented sensitive skin wipes without a problem. The kids have done fine with aveeno lotions (non-scented) Oh yah and tagging on @darkfrye comment... we only bath once a week (spot clean as needed of course). Heck the twins are almost 2.5 and still only get bathed about once a week (more now though if they get really dirty/sweaty)

kickball7091 · September 2017

@balletnerd In terms of postnatal care, I found I could get by for a few days/weeks with whatever the hospital sent me home with, like a bunch of mesh underwear (yesssssssss), enormous chilled pads, squirt bottle, and some numbing cream. After those ran out, I would just order replacement items through Amazon.

I'd actually recommend against going too insane in this area before the birth; my sister spent like 3 days creating these numbing, eucalyptus, super-pads that filled up her freezer pre-baby, only to ultimately have an emergency c-section. Since she left the hospital with a relatively intact crotch, she ended up throwing away all those pads.

So, you don't really know what you're going to need, so I'd avoid going too overboard on any specific thing. I do have one tip though - your tiny bathroom garbage can is not sufficient for the sheer amount of refuse you'll create post baby (constantly throwing out mesh underwear, huge pads, etc.) You're gonna need to temporarily move another, bigger, trashcan into the bathroom to handle this kind of nonsense.

babytimeagain · September 2017

@kickball7091 Thanks for the trashcan tip! I never would have thought of that. Something to look forward to- eye roll.

failuretofly · September 2017

@kickball I actually appreciated having a smaller can that I just emptied frequently because I found all those soiled items got pretty stinky as they sat.

skc040512 · September 2017

For people with questions about lotions, I've found this lotion to be the ONLY thing that keeps DDs eczema under control. We slather her up in this, and then put a layer of aquaphor on her. Works like a dream, and the lotion is all natural. It also works great if you get an itch from a bug bite or something...takes the itch out almost immediately. Although, it should come plated in gold for how expensive it can get...

https://www.amazon.com/Psoriasis-Advanced-Non-Greasy-Moisturizer-Dermatitis/dp/B00OSAUYTA/ref=redir_mobile_desktop?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&ref_=yo_ii_img

kickball7091 · September 2017

@failuretofly Yea, we are lucky enough to have multiple bathrooms, so I just stuck to using our master bathroom for the first few weeks. It was my own personal recovery area, and I wouldn't let any guests use it. I didn't notice a smell, but we also use those scented garbage bags, so maybe it was just covered up.

whiska · September 2017

@kickball7091 Oh my goodness, you just made me realize another reason I do not want overnight guests for a while. We only have one bath and it was already hard sharing it when people would come to stay pre-pregnancy. Postpartum sounds like a horror show

kickball7091 · September 2017

@whiska I mean, I think it also depends on the guests. If it was, like, my sister or cousin, I'd just give them a quick heads-up that there's a decent chance they'll be seeing my blood at some point during the visit. But I'd be squeamish if my husband's aunt were to see any gore.
I'm mostly joking here by the way; your bathroom will likely not look like a scene out of some terrible horror movie. But yea, there will probably be some blood in there somewhere.

MJDsquared · September 2017

What hands-free pumping bras have you used and loved? I know everyone's boobs are different so personal preference will vary, but there are just SO many when I searched on Amazon and I was super overwhelmed!

GraysonsMama · September 2017

Re: Reusable breast pads. I bought some bamboo ones on Amazon and loved them. However, we had a terrible time with thrush that would just not go away so I would recommend having one box of disposable pads too. The cream you have to use will not wash out of reusable breast pads and they make a nice home for yeast.

cait5413 · September 2017

@MJDsquared The Lanisoh pumping bra works well, but is not comfortable to wear all day (if you were wearing to pump at work, for example), especially if you have bigger boobs. This one was comfier to wear for a longer period, but it's not super supportive and ran a little big for me: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00ROPBMLK/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&th=1 I also ordered a contraption that looks like it is made out of shoelaces, that you wear around your neck and fasten around your back that will hold the pump parts in place, but you don't wear it all day, just unhook your nursing bra and put this on. I can't remember what it is called at the moment, but it did work fairly well. You can also cut holes in a sports bra, but again, not something you would want to wear all day.

moonlady-2 · September 2017

Are changing tables REALLY necessary?

I'm more of a minimalist and it just seems silly to me to buy one. But I've also never had a baby so..... WDYT?

whiska · September 2017

@moonlady-2 My sister DID use her changing table a lot for all of her three kids, but like you I am on team minimalist (we have limited room anyway!) so I'm just going to put a changing pad on baby's dresser like this.

Image result for changing pad on dresser

ETA I'll put changing accessories in the drawers below and/or have shelves higher up above that baby can't reach with diapers and such.

I've read you can also buy these trays (like this one from Target) to put the pad in to make it less likely to slip off, but those can be pricey so we might just put little grippies on the bottom of the pad or a nonslip mat and hope that helps.

wabash15 · September 2017

@mjdsquared I used the Madella one... so you just wear it when pumping. It worked for me.
@moonlady-2 no you don't need a specific spot. We have a changing pad on a dresser. I also know plenty of people who just change where ever they are... couch floor whatever.

cait5413 · September 2017

@moonlady-2 we're team changing pad on the dresser.

skc040512 · September 2017

@moonlady-2 I found that I use our changing table much more now that DD is mobile and always tries to run away during a diaper change. Until she was about a year old, I mostly changed her on the floor, couch or bed (with a small changing pad like the ones that cone with most diaper bags).

katiegeminimoon · September 2017

Do I really need diaper genie or will a regular trash can suffice?

cait5413 · September 2017

@ktcakes87 We got the Munchkin Arm & Hammer trash can rather than the diaper genie and have been pretty happy with it. I will say, if you are breastfeeding, the newborn diapers don't smell that bad. When we had to start supplementing with formula and when DD started eating more solids was when they got really stinky--and I mean really. Once you get to that point, I don't think a regular trash can would cut it. Please note there are two versions of the Munchkin diaper pail--not sure about the diaper genie. We got the cheaper one, which opens from the top (no foot pedal to open)--this is a mistake!!! So hard to put a dirty diaper in a trash can you have to open from the top while trying to corral a wiggly baby. Whatever type you get, make sure you can open it with your foot.

failuretofly · September 2017

@ktcakes87 we just have a small flip-top can that holds kitchen sized bags and it works fine. It's stinky when you open it but so is a diaper genie.

anewadventure · September 2017

@ktcakes87 we did not do a diaper genie type system. i was not a fan of basically having a million diapers slowly rotting in the house.

we got two small stainless steel simple human trashcans and the matching fitted trash bags. i scoffed at the price at first but we LOVE them. we had two because at first you change the baby allllll the time and we have a multi-level townhouse. so we had one on the main floor by our diaper changing supplies and one by the changing pad on the dresser in the nursery.

basically at the beginning all diapers went in and you just empty it a lot. once the rate of diaper changes slows down, all pee diapers go in the can and all poop diapers get immediately tied up in another bag and thrown outside in the vicinity of the trash can (lol). the pee diaper bag goes out at least once a week (our trash comes twice a week). the can isn't so small that it is TOO small but it's not so big that you build up this huge stinky mess.

i'd highly recommend if you're not a fan of the diaper genie system. let me go find a link to the can we got.

pretty sure it was this one - we deleted the old registry. https://smile.amazon.com/simplehuman-Semi-Round-Trash-Stainless-Steel/dp/B001BO76WY/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1506522587&sr=8-9&keywords=simple+human+trash+can

it might seem silly to pay for the specific bags but i highly recommend it. don't mess around with bags that don't fit or you're just going to aggravate yourself. we bought them in bulk from simple human directly so they weren't that much more expensive per bag.

lavashiner · September 2017

@ktcakes87 We had a friend give us an ubbi diaper pail which was a glorified trash can; I wasn't into it. Then we had a friend give us a hand-me-down diaper genie which I do quite like. We do cloth diapers but use disposable for nighttime, so we only have to take it out every two weeks or so (also, DD doesn't poop at night anymore, so they're not that stinky. When she was still pooping we'd take it out more frequently.). I'd say if you can get one second hand, give it a go, otherwise a trashcan with a lid should be fine.

darkfyre · September 2017

@anewadventure I mocked the price too. Never Again. We have had that trash can for over 15 years and I still love it. Worth the money!

tmk0325 · September 2017

Honestly, we just threw them all in the garbage and at the rate we went through diapers it was changed every couple days! We have a garbage can with a lid on it. It worked just fine. I don't think a diaper genie or special pail is really necessary!

We used the changing table on our pnp because it came with it and we used it all the time. Once we switched locations and didn't need the pnp out, we got just a changing mat and we use it on top of the dresser or other sturdy surface. A specific changing table is not necessary in my opinion, however if you do have it, it does come in handy!

skc040512 · September 2017

We currently use the Target Up&Up diapers on DD, but the price of the Walmart brand diapers is realllly tempting. Has anyone tried those and found them to be worth the savings?

jesrude · September 2017

I second all the recommendations to wait on the post part lady bit care. I received quite a few supplies in the hospital.

I agree with a few others about diaper pails. A regular trash can with lid should suffice.

I recommend a touch light if you are rooming-in or co-sleeping at home. It's a life saver, at least I thought so with my first. And it isn't so bright it'll wake up your partner.

Also, even though I'm a STM, this thread is gold. I added like 5 things to my registry today that i saw on this thread!

MJDsquared · October 2017

My question: We ended up getting a hand me down Graco version of the rock n play (no idea what it’s called). Anyway, I know it doesn’t have the incline of the rock n play, and I also registered for the RnP that auto-rocks. My question is, should I still keep the RnP on my registry? I know the incline of the RnP is a big draw for moms of babies with reflux. And I know at least one STM on here recommended the auto-rocking.

FTM questions for STM+ 9/19

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