Intro. Time for ivf again. BFN discussed

LittleRocket · September 2017

Well, just got what feels like my millionth BFN. We've been trying unassisted for 10 months, which I know isn't actually that long. I told myself that if it didn't work this time, I'd finally call our ivf doctor again. We have diagnosed male factor infertility and I'm 37. We are the lucky parents of a beautiful boy who is about to turn two. With him, we got pregnant via ivf, so I shouldn't be surprised that we need it again, but I still thought that we magically might avoid it. We've been in the slow process of fully weaning so we can do ivf. I'm so scared that it won't work, of all of the pain and disappointment, of the crazy costs, of the time, all of it. But, I'm also so lucky. I have one beautiful child and I'll be able to do ivf. How long did you try before ivf? How did you deal with weaning? How did you do all of the appointments with a child? Any other advice? I'm thankful to have this forum. Thank you for the support!

jlooshivf · September 2017

Hey there! I am new to the thread, but thought I would share my experience with you. My DH and I were TTC for about 3 years before finding out IVF was our only option. Our whole process started in May this year. Between all the tests (ouch), and the shots (ugh) we finally had our ER this past Thursday. Our doctor decided right off the bat that he would be doing a 5 day transfer so long as our little guys were maturing enough to move forward. We ended up retrieving 23 eggs/18 mature/16 fertilized/15 made it to day 5. Our ET was this morning. We transferred 1 AA day five hatching blastocyst, and ended up having a definite 7 to freeze (3 others still have potential). Here starts the dreaded 2ww. We have no other children so I cant comment on how the process would be with kids in the picture. My advice is to just take it one day at a time. The whole process is very stressful both physically and emotionally. Stay positive, and remember why you are doing it. Hope this helps!! Good luck.

LittleRocket · September 2017

Thank you so much for replying and sharing your story with me! Oh man, the 2ww is brutal but exciting! That's so awesome that you had a great egg to transfer and good ones to freeze. We didn't start with big numbers and could only go to day 3 because they weren't looking great. We had no 1AA. We had none that would withstand freezing. But, on the second round, it worked! I'm so thankful. I also know how hard it is-- the whole process. I'm so excited for you, though I know it's a hard time. Good luck & keep in touch!

kistra · January 2018

Hi, I am in a very similar place (repeating IUI rather than IVF). Initially I wanted to start fertility treatments again right away at a year just in case. I stopped the birth control when my son was 6 months old and started temping and timed TTC at 9 months to prepare. But then I couldn't bring myself to wean my son and I also hoped there might be some chance that I would just get pregnant... You hear all those stories about people being more fertile after a pregnancy, right?

I don't have an answer for you. My DH and I found a clinical trial that would pay for free cycles so we signed up for that. It also put off starting treatments themselves for four months. I think I would still be debating the right time it we hadn't had the financial incentive to sign up. My first new cycle appointment was today and I had been dreading the appointment all week. I don't know what your experience was like with your son but I was so excited and optimistic that first cycle the first time around and it is so different going in knowing how much it all sucks and doesn't have a guarantee.

Weaning my son was easier than I expected but I still feel guilty about it. I know every child is different but I just offered other forms of comfort and food first to decrease nursing and then made myself unavailable at times he usually nursed.

patricej55 · July 2018

Hi, I also am in a similar place. My son is 9 months old and we are ready to try for baby #2. It took us awhile for our first. Ended up pregnant 2nd round of IVF. I say “try” for baby #2 already because I don’t think, for whatever reason, it will happen right away. My goal is when my first born turns 2, then we will move forward with the frozen embryos that we have. I’m hoping the second time around is less stressful since we already have our beautiful son but if for some reason we can get pregnant a second time, it will be okay.

Griffin5413 · September 2018

we are in the same place. our son will be 2 in December after our first round of IVF. We just started round 2 with FET scheduled for Oct 4. Our issues were related to my husband but we haven't been preventing for over a year. Even though realistically we knew it wouldnt happen naturally, there was still this part of me that was devastated every month when AF came to town.

Because we already have 4 frozen embryos the process has been really simple. Once we met with the RE, I had to to an ultrasound, the saline histogram and pretty much started. It's only about a 6 week process where I was on pills for about 3 weeks, started Lupron and have added in estrace. I'll increase estrace up until transfer and start PIO 5 days before transfer. My little one is in daycare anyway so I've just scheduled my appointments around times before I pick him up. I haven't been breastfeeding since he was 4 months b/c my body never produced enough anyway so I can't help with that part.

I think the fears are still there that we deal with the first time right. In the back of your head you fear that it won't work but there is also that hope. I will say that the first time around, I really didn't feel like a crazy woman on hormones but this time around, I definitely notice my reactions are definitely more on the crazy lady level. LOL. My poor husband is so good at dealing with that!

agaun · September 2018

Hi. @LittleRocket
Total get the hopeful aspect.
I know I have no chance of ovulation but every month I am just hoping it happened.

Our closest fertility clinic is 3 hours away so with IVF I find it easier as it is pretty routine. VS IUI

I am 26 years old. Have pcos never use birth control and never ovulated on my own. Started actively ttc at 22 years old. Went to a specialist and started iui

Second try was successfully (who knew how blessed we are) this was with 13 injections of menopur 50iu. (he is currently 16 months old)

So fast forward to now. We have tried iui again 2 times. But my resistance to hormones is worse. (I need 24-30 injection to start making a folical) after a chemical pregnancy the doc recommend IVF.

IuI was hectic travel for scans and shots.
First IVF should be Oct so we normally leave at 3am drive all the way. See the doctor get the shots and drive back. We try find someone to rather stay home and take him to school, but doesn't always work. It's hectic compared to not taking a kid with but not nearly as hectic as you think.
Not sure where your clinic is and how long you wait but definitely get a new toy or such that might entertain the little rascal. We always have 'youtube go' for some coco melon vids if he gets to upset with us.

hope this helps.
Good luck

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