People keep telling me mixed answers on this. I turn 21 on 8/14 and was wondering if I can order one glass of wine at dinner to celebrate. I will be 15 weeks by then.
This is why we need to lower the drinking age in the US and make alcohol less of a novelty. Then it won't be such a big deal to turn 21 and drink even while pregnant.
OP, you're obviously free to do what you want (though reading some research on alcohol and pregnancy is advised), but if I were you I'd wait until baby is born to celebrate being able to drink legally.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
If it were me, I'd have a small 1/2 glass of wine to celebrate. I had small 1/2 glasses of wine a few times during my last pregnancy, but never more than that.
While it is true that no amount of alcohol has been proven to be safe, there are also numerous studies that show that light drinking (up to 1 drink per week) does not show adverse effects.
"But small amounts of alcohol early in pregnancy may not risk the mother’s health and the health of their babies as much as previously believed. Minimal alcohol use during the first trimester doesn’t appear to increase the risk for high blood pressure complications, or premature birth or low birth weights. That’s the findings of a study previously published in the journal Obstetrics and Gynecology."
The main issue, at least as it concerns the ACOG, is that while there is no convincing evidence that a drink here and there causes ill-effects or increases the risk of alcohol-related morbidity and mortality, it's nearly impossible to control or monitor how one individual defines an occasional drink vs. moderate or heavy alcohol consumption. There is an inherent risk in a caregiver just giving a blanket prescription to consume alcohol when self-reporting is known to be inaccurate. What's "light drinking" to one may actually be moderate drinking, and there's no way to really make sure every patient understands and follows the one or two standard drink rule of low-level drinking. That is what the guideline of abstaining is so widespread, though I know some individuals are more comfortable with a glass of wine for a special occasion later in pregnancy. There is a concern of litigation if caregivers make allowances for the occasional drink. It just opens the door for patients to abuse the rule and then blame the caregivers should one's level of drinking lead to FAS.
G 12.04 | E 11.06 | D 11.08 | H 12.09 | R 11.14 | Expecting #6 2.16.18.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
Each to their own. Personally, I am totally okay with having a small wine spritzer here or there. But often I don't simply because it doesn't sit well in my stomach. I'm not talking getting a buzz, just a small drink.
My mom is a NICU nurse and we've discussed this often. Its not like you're drinking a fifth of vodka. Also my sister lives in another country, Its totally normal there for pregnant woman to have a wine spritzer here and there. They aren't as strict or judgmental.
I feel like this is a topic where either you're cool with it or you're not. No amount of data will sway someone one way or another. You do your own research and make your conclusions.
If youre cool with it, enjoy a small wine. Enjoy yourself. Also, I suggest demanding large quantities of desserts for your birthday. Like an entire cake for yourself.
Each to their own. Personally, I am totally okay with having a small wine spritzer here or there. But often I don't simply because it doesn't sit well in my stomach. I'm not talking getting a buzz, just a small drink.
My mom is a NICU nurse and we've discussed this often. Its not like you're drinking a fifth of vodka. Also my sister lives in another country, Its totally normal there for pregnant woman to have a wine spritzer here and there. They aren't as strict or judgmental.
I feel like this is a topic where either you're cool with it or you're not. No amount of data will sway someone one way or another. You do your own research and make your conclusions.
If youre cool with it, enjoy a small wine. Enjoy yourself. Also, I suggest demanding large quantities of desserts for your birthday. Like an entire cake for yourself.
@fishyfishfish234 - This is why we won't have the ACOG or other medical bodies making a PSA that drinking alcohol during pregnancy is a-okay, but individual caregivers may be fine with a patient having a small glass of wine, beer or wine cooler once they're further along. I had an OB suggest a massage, warm bath and glass of wine once I hit early term when I mentioned being stressed and dealing with anxiety. All of my midwives okayed a glass of wine later in pregnancy and trusted their clients, based on the relationship they built overtime, to understand what occasional actually means. But it's not something providers will universally encourage or okay due to the concerns I previously stated.
G 12.04 | E 11.06 | D 11.08 | H 12.09 | R 11.14 | Expecting #6 2.16.18.
So... This is my two cents. Is it really that important to have a drink just because it's your 21st birthday?? Let's not pretend out here that people aren't consuming alcohol before they're 21.
I asked one simple question not for all you judgmental people to bash on me. Like I said before I kept getting mixed answers on this question so I wanted this threads opinion because I ask my midwife.
I wanted a drink. I was feeling super stressed. I thought it would be fine. I did a quick Google search and even one drink increases your risk of miscarriage, still birth and a million other things. I personally decided it was better not to risk it. That's not me fear mongering, just sharing my experience and the overall conclusion from research that no amount of alcohol is safe during pregnancy.
I asked one simple question not for all you judgmental people to bash on me. Like I said before I kept getting mixed answers on this question so I wanted this threads opinion because I ask my midwife.
What did your midwife say? You should follow her advice, she knows you And your pregnancy better than internet strangers.
I asked one simple question not for all you judgmental people to bash on me. Like I said before I kept getting mixed answers on this question so I wanted this threads opinion because I ask my midwife.
Cry me a river. I thought everyone responded kindly.
Hmm..I must have missed the judgemental bashing. Why did you pose a question on a controversial topic to an entire community of diverse ladies on the internet if you weren't prepared for the real answers?
I asked one simple question not for all you judgmental people to bash on me. Like I said before I kept getting mixed answers on this question so I wanted this threads opinion because I ask my midwife.
I also thought everyone responded with respectful answers. I think you wanted to get answers that only agreed with you. Newsflash, when you ask for an opinion, people don't have to agree. And not agreeing doesn't = judgmental or bashing. I'd love for you to point out where someone bashes you? I honestly think there is a lot of useul information here. Particularly the links @soulcupcake took a lot of time to give you. You should be happy that strangers you have never even introduced yourself to care enough to help you make an informed decision.
I seriously can't stand SS who ask for an opinion and then get offended when one is given. If you chill out and take the time to re-read people's helpful responses, please read the sticky posts, introduce yourself in the introductions, and stick around. This community can be a great support system.
This has been extremely tame considering this is a pretty inflammatory topic on TB. You and your midwife can assess the risk and only you can decide if its worth it. FWW this is not going to be the last thing you miss out on because you are pregnant/ have a child, and its a little hard for me (and I assume others) to relate to what is, in my mind, a not that important thing that could have terrible consequences.
But again, this is your choice, the reason there are so many mixed answers is because there are so many unknowns. But there are studies to read and statistics to weigh, and your midwife will have their opinion as well.
People keep telling me mixed answers on this. I turn 21 on 8/14 and was wondering if I can order one glass of wine at dinner to celebrate. I will be 15 weeks by then.
No one was judgemental. You had to know that this is a hot button topic. Someone said it earlier: it sounds like you wanted people to agree with you and say "yes that would be fine" so you could justify your decision. Sorry but that's not how it works. If you ask for opinions, you will get them. And many won't agree with you. You will encounter that throughout your life and not everyone will be as polite as people have been on here.
****TW Signature****
DD born 04/28/2002 Married DH 03/25/2017 1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017 BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
I actually opened this thread thinking you would have gotten some backlash but everyone was actually very respectful. Ask your doctor/midwife and you'll likely get more in depth answers. I turned 30 over the weekend and I think that's a big birthday but I found other stuff to celebrate with...like food. Lots of food. Like others said, you do you boo.
To each their own. I personally had an occasional glass of wine with my first pregnancy and have a healthy 3 yr old. However, I do believe a glass to one may not be a glass to another. Size matters. Not condoning drinking a bottle. Or glass everyday. But in my opinion a small glass occasionally is ok. I'll probably do the same later this pregnancy.
Each to their own. Personally, I am totally okay with having a small wine spritzer here or there. But often I don't simply because it doesn't sit well in my stomach. I'm not talking getting a buzz, just a small drink.
My mom is a NICU nurse and we've discussed this often. Its not like you're drinking a fifth of vodka. Also my sister lives in another country, Its totally normal there for pregnant woman to have a wine spritzer here and there. They aren't as strict or judgmental.
I feel like this is a topic where either you're cool with it or you're not. No amount of data will sway someone one way or another. You do your own research and make your conclusions.
If youre cool with it, enjoy a small wine. Enjoy yourself. Also, I suggest demanding large quantities of desserts for your birthday. Like an entire cake for yourself.
@fishyfishfish234 - This is why we won't have the ACOG or other medical bodies making a PSA that drinking alcohol during pregnancy is a-okay, but individual caregivers may be fine with a patient having a small glass of wine, beer or wine cooler once they're further along. I had an OB suggest a massage, warm bath and glass of wine once I hit early term when I mentioned being stressed and dealing with anxiety. All of my midwives okayed a glass of wine later in pregnancy and trusted their clients, based on the relationship they built overtime, to understand what occasional actually means. But it's not something providers will universally encourage or okay due to the concerns I previously stated.
@soulcupcake Haha, I'm a jerk, I won't lie - I saw a long post with a ton of links and immediately thought "omg someone's gone down the rabbit hole of onesided information." Had I properly read your post I would have seen that you clearly *mic dropped* this topic.
I apologize and award you a gold star of knowledge.
Give me a break, OP. The responses you got were very tame considering the controversial topic you chose to post about. Agreeing =/= support. Disagreeing =/= attacking, judging, or being rude.
Of course this is a heated topic, I've personally decided not to drink at all during pregnancy. I think it's a lot easier to handle my anxiety when I know I'm minimising risk as much I as I can.
I think everyone has been pretty respectful. I get it's your 21st but the reality is that no one really knows how alcohol affects a fetus. Having a drink isn't really worth a risk in my opinion. A glass of wine doesn't satisfy me in a way where the benefit would ever outweigh the risk.
Me: 33 DH: 31 DS: 5 years old TTC #2 since August 2015 July 2016: Testing cycle with 100 mg Clomid = BFN August 2016: 50 mg Clomid + IUI = BFN October 2016: IVF#1 - 13 retrieved / 12 mature / 9 fertilized / 2 blasts November 2016: FET#1 = chemical January 2017: FET#2 = chemical March 2017: IVF#2 - 18 retrieved / 18 mature / 16 fertilized / 5 blasts
April 24, 2017: FET#3 - BFN May 24, 2017: FET#4 - BFP! - Beta #1 151 - Beta #2 503 - Due date 2/9/18
I agree with those saying it's not worth it. You have the rest of your life to have a drink. It's not worth the risks.
And I didn't drink in my 21st and it was fine. It's not at all what I remember. This is one of the many choices you'll have to make to put your child first.
I think OP is just showing her maturity honestly. I could not careless about the internet validating my lifestyle choices. And saying people are bashing her just means she feels internally guilty. OP, own your decision and be okay with it. But don't expect everyone to feel the same way you do.
If it were me, I'd have a small 1/2 glass of wine to celebrate. I had small 1/2 glasses of wine a few times during my last pregnancy, but never more than that.
While it is true that no amount of alcohol has been proven to be safe, there are also numerous studies that show that light drinking (up to 1 drink per week) does not show adverse effects.
^ This! I had my bday when I was about 7 weeks. We went on a trip and I ordered a small glass of wine at dinner, which DH drank most of. I had a few sips and honestly it didn't even taste that good to me. Alcohol has been tasting very strong and beer especially tastes bitter. Sometimes I take a sip of DH's beer to make sure I don't like it! LOL
That said, I think North America is way uptight about drinking during pregnancy. Other cultures don't frown upon it because people know how to practice moderation. However, listen to your doctor/midwife and be careful. Like I said, I'd have a few sips, but not a whole glass, especially in first tri (I know you're in second tri so that's just a general statement).
Me: 34 | DH: 33 Married Aug. 2013 TTC #1 Sep. 2016 ***TW***
BFP Jan. 15, 2017; MMC Mar. 4, 2017 at 10w6d BFP Jun. 5, 2017; MMC Aug. 2, 2017 at 11w6d BFP Nov. 20, 2017; ended in CP All the tests. Everything normal except treated for ureaplasma and DH potentially has high DNAF. BFP Dec. 25, 2017; EDD Sep. 5, 2018; DD arrived Aug. 26th My chart: https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/63f71d
FWIW my OB and I are friends on Facebook/Instagram. DD and I were eating *cooked* sushi and she was like hey Reminder you can't have that! A few days earlier I'd posted a picture of DH and I cheersing to selling our house. It was sparkling cider and not champagne so I mentioned that to her in that conversation. She said "I am far more concerned about sushi than I am a glass of champagne" BUT she is MY doctor and knows my history etc. I think you should just ask your doctor or midwife. They will most likely tell you what everyone else is, there's no amount that's proven safe.
Nothing wrong with a few sips/half a glass to celebrate a milestone like that! I turned 30 the other day and said 'cheers!' with all my friends. I agree alcohol intake during pregnancy should be extremely minimal. If you're concerned chat to your doctor. Happy Birthday!!
Not sure if anyone has read Expecting Better by Emily Oster? She has undertaken a lot of research and made it digestible. I really enjoyed it. I think her background may be as an economist... at any rate, she uses her data analysis and stats skills to breaks down the risks based on the best studies undertaken globally on loads of topics - risks around food, alcohol, miscarriage, pharmaceuticals etc. I recommend it for anyone is who is anxious and knowledge hungry. And maybe who would like some reassurance around the very occasional half glass of red....
Not sure if anyone has read Expecting Better by Emily Oster? She has undertaken a lot of research and made it digestible. I really enjoyed it. I think her background may be as an economist... at any rate, she uses her data analysis and stats skills to breaks down the risks based on the best studies undertaken globally on loads of topics - risks around food, alcohol, miscarriage, pharmaceuticals etc. I recommend it for anyone is who is anxious and knowledge hungry. And maybe who would like some reassurance around the very occasional half glass of red....
I saw this book mentioned in a thread the other day - can't remember who posted about it but I'm super grateful! I downloaded it last night and have been reading like crazy. This is the most informed I've felt so far. I spend my days doing risk analysis at work and her approach is right up my alley. I obviously haven't finished it yet but second your recommendation for sure.
@LydRussell I read it during my last pregnancy and it was so enlightening and helpful. It took so much of the stress away about eating rules while pregnant.
@LydRussell I have that one and immediately read the chapters on food and exercise and I loved her rational approach. Warning: I also bought The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy and it's the worst. It's nothing but anecdotes about her and her girlfriends' pregnancies that she's passing off as advice...no actual data to back up anything she says. Completely worthless.
ETA to correct grammar, she has more than one girlfriend.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
Yeah - I read her for my last pregnancy and loved her pragmatism. I haven't heard of The Girlfriends' Guide To Pregnancy but will give it a miss then! I think the only book I need right now is How to Handle a Rambunctious Two Year Old and a Newborn (for Dummies)
Re: Sipping one glass of red wine while eating food?
I have never heard any doctor in practice recommending that. I don't know every doctor on the planet, though.
OP, you're obviously free to do what you want (though reading some research on alcohol and pregnancy is advised), but if I were you I'd wait until baby is born to celebrate being able to drink legally.
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
While it is true that no amount of alcohol has been proven to be safe, there are also numerous studies that show that light drinking (up to 1 drink per week) does not show adverse effects.
#2 due 2.15.18
This is one:
https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1465-3362.2011.00331.x/abstract
These are the results of low-level drinking, defined as one or two standard drinks -- one or two drinks per occasion, and less than seven a week.
https://www.abc.net.au/health/library/stories/2003/12/18/1828686.htm#b
The 2011 review found similar findings as one done in 2007:
https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1471-0528.2006.01163.x/abstract
"The Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists states that small amounts of alcohol have not been shown to be harmful."
https://www.bmj.com/content/351/bmj.h5232
"But small amounts of alcohol early in pregnancy may not risk the mother’s health and the health of their babies as much as previously believed. Minimal alcohol use during the first trimester doesn’t appear to increase the risk for high blood pressure complications, or premature birth or low birth weights. That’s the findings of a study previously published in the journal Obstetrics and Gynecology."
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/study-no-connection-between-drinking-alcohol-early-in-pregnancy-and-birth-problems-201309106667
The main issue, at least as it concerns the ACOG, is that while there is no convincing evidence that a drink here and there causes ill-effects or increases the risk of alcohol-related morbidity and mortality, it's nearly impossible to control or monitor how one individual defines an occasional drink vs. moderate or heavy alcohol consumption. There is an inherent risk in a caregiver just giving a blanket prescription to consume alcohol when self-reporting is known to be inaccurate. What's "light drinking" to one may actually be moderate drinking, and there's no way to really make sure every patient understands and follows the one or two standard drink rule of low-level drinking. That is what the guideline of abstaining is so widespread, though I know some individuals are more comfortable with a glass of wine for a special occasion later in pregnancy. There is a concern of litigation if caregivers make allowances for the occasional drink. It just opens the door for patients to abuse the rule and then blame the caregivers should one's level of drinking lead to FAS.
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
My mom is a NICU nurse and we've discussed this often. Its not like you're drinking a fifth of vodka. Also my sister lives in another country, Its totally normal there for pregnant woman to have a wine spritzer here and there. They aren't as strict or judgmental.
I feel like this is a topic where either you're cool with it or you're not. No amount of data will sway someone one way or another. You do your own research and make your conclusions.
If youre cool with it, enjoy a small wine. Enjoy yourself. Also, I suggest demanding large quantities of desserts for your birthday. Like an entire cake for yourself.
Love tits if you drank before 21!
older siblings: ds 16 dd 14 ds 13 dd 11 dd 7
I seriously can't stand SS who ask for an opinion and then get offended when one is given. If you chill out and take the time to re-read people's helpful responses, please read the sticky posts, introduce yourself in the introductions, and stick around. This community can be a great support system.
But again, this is your choice, the reason there are so many mixed answers is because there are so many unknowns. But there are studies to read and statistics to weigh, and your midwife will have their opinion as well.
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
DD #1 3/26/13
Mo/Mo twins MMC 3/31/14
DD #2 3/31/15
DD #3 8/25/16
@soulcupcake Haha, I'm a jerk, I won't lie - I saw a long post with a ton of links and immediately thought "omg someone's gone down the rabbit hole of onesided information." Had I properly read your post I would have seen that you clearly *mic dropped* this topic.
I apologize and award you a gold star of knowledge.
ETA: words are hard
DS: 5 years old
TTC #2 since August 2015
July 2016: Testing cycle with 100 mg Clomid = BFN
August 2016: 50 mg Clomid + IUI = BFN
October 2016: IVF#1 - 13 retrieved / 12 mature / 9 fertilized / 2 blasts
November 2016: FET#1 = chemical
January 2017: FET#2 = chemical
March 2017: IVF#2 - 18 retrieved / 18 mature / 16 fertilized / 5 blasts
May 24, 2017: FET#4 - BFP! - Beta #1 151 - Beta #2 503 - Due date 2/9/18
And I didn't drink in my 21st and it was fine. It's not at all what I remember. This is one of the many choices you'll have to make to put your child first.
That said, I think North America is way uptight about drinking during pregnancy. Other cultures don't frown upon it because people know how to practice moderation. However, listen to your doctor/midwife and be careful. Like I said, I'd have a few sips, but not a whole glass, especially in first tri (I know you're in second tri so that's just a general statement).
Married Aug. 2013
TTC #1 Sep. 2016
***TW***
BFP Jun. 5, 2017; MMC Aug. 2, 2017 at 11w6d
BFP Nov. 20, 2017; ended in CP
All the tests. Everything normal except treated for ureaplasma and DH potentially has high DNAF.
BFP Dec. 25, 2017; EDD Sep. 5, 2018; DD arrived Aug. 26th
My chart: https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/63f71d
to breaks down the risks based on the best studies undertaken globally on loads of topics - risks around food, alcohol, miscarriage, pharmaceuticals etc. I recommend it for anyone is who is anxious and knowledge hungry. And maybe who would like some reassurance around the very occasional half glass of red....
#2 due 2.15.18
ETA to correct grammar, she has more than one girlfriend.
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18