January 2018 Moms

Why my pregnant self is crying 7/28

I realized that I forgot this last week! Sorry!


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Pregnancy Ticker

EDD: 1/6/2018
Eva Jane: 7/23/2014


Re: Why my pregnant self is crying 7/28

  • I've gotten teary for all sorts of reasons over the last few days. The two that come to mind:

    1. Watching the trailer for the movie Kidnap - it's just upsetting. It came on during a commercial.

    2. McCain voted NO and I cried happy tears.

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies!


    Pregnancy Ticker

    EDD: 1/6/2018
    Eva Jane: 7/23/2014


  • @missblaze I know... I mean McCain basically flew 2000 miles under the guise that he was there to help his party and then released a massive F-you to the way his party handled this and especially to Trump. Hey, Potus, remember when you said you like your heroes not captured? Lol... he remembers too  :D
    *TW*

    DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015

    DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017

    BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019

    BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020 

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  • whitta1015whitta1015 member
    edited July 2017
    My car was overdue for an oil change and I was finally able to leave work 30 minutes early to get to the dealership cause they told me they should be able to take me around that time when they weren't busy. When I got there, they told me they had just had like 3 people pull up before me and wouldn't be able to get to it. So I got back in my car and cried all the way home. hahaha
  • I thought of my #3!

    3. Reading all of the posts by transgender military heroes on Pantsuit Nation. All the tears, seriously.

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies!


    Pregnancy Ticker

    EDD: 1/6/2018
    Eva Jane: 7/23/2014


  • From a few days ago, but the Wonder Woman movie.
  • I got fired from my job at 18 weeks pregnant. I knew they didn't like pregnant women and I only worked there for three months before I found out I was pregnant. It was a corporate desk job but sales were involved. As soon as I started showing got the boot. I am so distraught for two reasons: 1. How do you find a job while you are pregnant? 2. How do you get new insurance while you are pregnant and not having an income? My SO can cover all of our other bills but insurance is super expensive. We are not married yet so I'm hoping maybe Medicaid will be an option. If anyone has gone through this I would love some advice!!
  • @koennia1217 - wait a minute, they fired you because you're pregnant? Can they do that?
  • @koennia1217 omg!!!! Did they actually say the reason was because you were pregnant? Im pretty sure that is illegal! Im so sorry to hear that :( Ask your SO if their company allows them to ad you on. I think some companies will allow you to add a plus one even if you arent married. Its worth a shot to ask. 

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @gusgus14 bless that man and his tact with pregnant ladies. Everyone needs to take lessons from him and he deserves a gold star. And probably a plate of cookies.
  • In this industry when you sign on you agree that they can fire you for no reason at all. When I informed them that I was pregnant they accused me of not informing them when I signed up for insurance- which I actually didn't know until I had the insurance for about three weeks. When I showed them how the weeks wouldn't have added up they had to apologize. I was warned then that the company usually finds a reason to fire women who are pregnant and to watch out. Naively I was so sure that wouldn't happen to me. Yes it is legal for them to do that. Unfortunately. 
  • My SO works for a start up and he actually doesn't have insurance either. 
  • @koennia1217 pretty sure that's illegal to fire you just for being pregnant.. agree with @livingoffpbjs, maybe ask if you can be added on to SO's plan? 
  • missblazemissblaze member
    edited July 2017
    @koennia1217 Depends on the state, but in some states Medicaid will insure pregnant women. You can also apply through healthcare.gov and see what they offer you (being fired is a special circumstance so you can apply outside open enrollment). Many times they will refer you to Medicaid if you qualify.

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies!


    Pregnancy Ticker

    EDD: 1/6/2018
    Eva Jane: 7/23/2014


  • @koennia1217 I don't have much advice as far as the insurance goes, but I honestly can't believe they gave you the boot for being pregnant! I am astonished for you!  I hope that things turn around.  Ugh I am pissed for you!
  • @schaze it's totally legal and happens more than I'm comfortable with. - also my SO doesn't have insurance because he works for a start up. 

    @missblaze I applied for Medicaid - unfortunately we may not apply since SO makes too much money- which is weird bc we are not married. 

    Thanks everyone for being mad for me. Right now I am super nervous and scared and also trying really hard to not be stressed out for the babe. I just know how this is all going to turn out. But it can't get much worse right? 
  • @koennia1217 I think I posted at the same time as you before. I'm so angry for you though, that's so unfair.
  • I found out on Wednesday that my new health insurance with my new company doesn't cover my OB/GYN that I have been seeing for (12) years.  (Back story: new job is in MD, live in MD with FI, but was seeing a doc in NJ since my principal residence is still there and I was going to make the delivery work from NJ).  I had a major breakdown and literally didn't know what to do.  I started to research policies outside of the company's policy, but for equal care it would be about $500/month.  That would then put a large dent in the extra income I am getting from my salary jump for this job.

    So my FI and I had a discussion to which I started crying uncontrollably and said I know it is just me being uncomfortable and not knowing any doctors and the insurance is completely paid for and I am being ridiculous for just not finding another doctor.  So I figured out what hospital I would like to deliver at down here in MD and then worked backwards with the practices that deliver there.  Decided on one and made the call yesterday morning. The woman was SOOO mean to me and told me that they weren't "accepting patients of my nature."  Like what?! I am 17 weeks pregnant and I am telling you I just lost the coverage of my OB.  Que the tears once again.  

    I then found another practice and the woman (Mary) was the nicest woman in the world.  Said they would totally accept me for my circumstance and she made me feel so comfortable about the switch.  And tears once again. I swear I am going to give her a huge hug at my first appointment and a box of chocolate or something lol!
  • Watching "Growing up Wild." I lost it at the part where the little orphaned monkey is on the verge of starving to death, and one of the male leaders adopted the baby and showed him where to get food. Oh, the waterworks that ensued...
    Also, @koennia1217, I definitely think you should look into what @whitta1218 said. Something sounds fishy to me with that whole situation! 
  • edited July 2017
    Even in an at-will state, they cannot legally fire you for discriminatory reasons (race, sex, religion) and pregnancy is definitely part of that. 

    I knew a girl who got fired for having a miscarriage (she missed work) and she sued them for a boatload and won. It was also in an at-will state, and for a crappy telemarketer.

    Don't let them win!

    Editing to add, my pregnant self has been crying off and on all day because my friends F&A had their baby girl today and she is precious. She is so pink and tiny and I love her. 
  • @koennia1217 - it's a federal law, and if they said that you were fired because you'e pregnant, then you have a nice little (and almost guaranteed win-able) lawsuit on your hands. Also, a few years ago i was laid off, and was able to be put on DH's insurance even though it wasn't the "open enrollment" period. Lay offs are usually one of the exceptions to that, so you shouldn't have that much trouble getting onto it. good luck!
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  • @koennia1217 I would definitely take these ladies' advice and look into it further. That sounds totally illegal and I'm so mad for you at that whole situation!

    AFM, I started bawling listening to "The I Love You Song" from The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. It's such a gorgeous, heartbreaking song about emotionally and physically absent parents.
    BFP #1 4.2.12, M/C 4.12.12 @ 6 weeks :: BFP #2 10.20.12, EDD 6.25.13 Pregnancy Ticker
  • @koennia1217
    Time to lawyer up! I 100% agree with what these smart ladies above have said and your case is even stronger since you said they made you "prove" you were not pregnant when they hired you! It was none of their business even if you were pregnant, cause if they excluded you because of pregnancy it is DISCRIMINATION! Hopefully you have a paper/ email trail. Definitely start making a timeline of events and a list of witnesses. 
  • Thank you all for the advice. It would be an incredibly difficult case to win as I have no proof (paper trail, recorded conversations) and they're  are owned by one of the biggest companies in the world. They have an amazing team of lawyers and they make sure that they don't do anything to leave themselves vulnerable in the first place (i.e. Having you sign a contract when you first start giving them permission to terminate for no reason). They did not fire "because I was pregnant" it was just obvious to me and alot of others. And not people I would ever expect would risk their jobs to help me win a legal battle. The biggest peice I have is that I put produced more than all the other new hires and they were all following the same practices I got fired for. So the stress of trying to fight one of the biggest corporations in the world during pregnancy sounds very daughnting. *also my SO doesn't have insurance bc he helped start a new company* so now I have to apply for Medicaid (and get denied), pay for cobra, or try to get a job even though I am obviously pregnant. 
  • @koennia1217 Wow that's a really tough situation! In California, i believe all pregnant women qualify for our Medicaid insurance.  Maybe move to CA? Just kidding! I wouldn't go with cobra because it's horrible coverage. When my employer cut my insurance a couple years ago, I went to individual insurance company websites (e.g. Anthem, Healthnet, Cigna, etc) and I ended up buying an individual plan directly from Healthnet, and it was actually pretty affordable! And it was decent coverage, it was an HMO but I had a hospitalization and major surgery with that insurance and it wasn't bad. Also, at the time DH and i were living together but not married,  so i didn't count his income and was still considered "single" status. I'd suggest shopping around insurance websites because you'll qualify for open enrollment. Good luck! 
  • A good lead you have is the person who warned you that they fired pregnant women. That person could probably give you the names of other women. It doesn't hurt to look into it. 
  • @koennia1217 Im an employment lawyer.  You say that it was obvious to you that they wanted you gone.  Can you confirm if you were fired or you resigned? If you were fired, what reason did they give? Eg poor performance, sickness or literally no reason (eg "under clause x of your contract we are choosing to terminate your employment"?
  • @Livvyloo87 yes it was termination. But no reason given. In the exit interview they referenced a practice that everyone does and said they have a zero tolerance policy. However, people texted me after saying they do the same thing and worried they would also be fired- they have not been. Like I said it is a very common practice and there has never been a discussion it never being allowed. On top of that I was on goal for the money I brought into the company and out producing all the other new hires. I was given reasonable accommodations per doctors due to hyperemesis. Three weeks after that I was terminated.
  • @koennia1217 I can totally understand not having the resources/brainspace whatever to deal with it. I'm sorry it happened to you. 
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