Unwanted Advice

miltbaby · July 2017

Today I was talking to my father about the registry and how my husband accidentally registered for 90 pacifiers. He then tells me that he is against pacifiers and that if I use a pacifier it is a sign that I am a lazy mom....

eazybreezy225 · July 2017

Your dad sounds like a dick. Life's too short to let other people talk to you like that. I usually let them have it.

splsmama2016 · July 2017

Hahahah!!! Ok.... if using a pacifier makes you a lazy mom, I'm the worst!! Pacifier, shusher, boppy lounger and the tv on for DD when she was about 4 months.

Sleep when the baby sleeps, sleep now before the baby comes, don't hold the baby too much, don't rock the baby to sleep or they'll expect it. It goes on and on... lol

mrsorigami · July 2017

@miltbaby wow! that is crazy. people always have their ridiculous opinions. my dd never would take a pacifier but i wish she did sometimes! seems like everyone else we know with kids used pacifiers religiously-it is definitely not a lazy thing.

sometimes our own parents give the worst advice..lol!

clovelyone · July 2017

@splsmama2016 What is a shusher?

splsmama2016 · July 2017

@clovelyone this is the shusher!!!

Baby Shusher - The Soothing Sleep Miracle for Babies https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00D2JN87I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_O2NDzbERYYDXB

KathrynJ088 · July 2017

"Sleep now while you can".. like it even matters a week from now how much I slept last night!

katiegeminimoon · July 2017

KathrynJ088 said:

"Sleep now while you can".. like it even matters a week from now how much I slept last night!

Right?! I wish we could bank extra hours now! It makes me roll my eyes when people say that. It doesn't even make sense! Maybe saying "appreciate sleep now" would be better, haha.

Marley629 · July 2017

"Put some cereal in the bottle before bed and the baby will sleep longer...". Nope that's not how this works grandma.

TigerCakes · July 2017

@Marley629 When I had my son I heard that from soooo many older people! Nope not happening then and it won't happen this time either.

clovelyone · July 2017

Thanks, @splsmama2016! I'll have to look into that.

Amber_Waves · July 2017

What an ugly thing to say! I'm sorry that happened, @miltbaby.

whiska · July 2017

@miltbaby Did you ask him why? That's a weird thing to draw a hard line in the sand about and pre-empt you into thinking you're some kind of bad parent for using them. Plus pacifier use is associated with decreased SIDS risk (even if the mechanism isn't entirely clear yet).

kater622 · July 2017

It's all getting kind of old to be honest. It usually just comes off condescending. "Just you wait! You have no idea! You're baby won't use a crib! You won't need this or that!"

If I don't specifically ask for advice I really don't want to hear it.

failuretofly · July 2017

@whiska I was feeling so guilty about 'giving in' and giving DS a pacifier... until I read that! Then I went and bought a bunch more!

kate0506 · July 2017

If pacifiers were that bad for babies, they wouldn't be on the market. Let's face it, sometimes we give in to these things for a slightly easier life. Personally my DS never wanted to use a pacifier, but if this baby needs one, then so be it.
And as for people telling you, not to hold your baby too much, I've had this said to me quite a few times... what a ridiculous piece of advice that is!! I will hold and give my baby as much cuddles and love as I want thanks.

miltbaby · July 2017

My dad told me that is what his mom did and that is what he did...so that is the way it is. I also reminded just because my grandmother did something 65 years ago doesn't make it correct. They also are anti-breastfeeding because it is "gross"...Needless to say he probably won't be around too much probably the first few months. Heaven for bid if my child gets hungry or cries...

thatlauragirl · July 2017

Gah! It makes me crazy when people use the "that's how I did it back in the day" reasoning. Come on, people. We're evolving and we can do better.

tmk0325 · July 2017

My mom is really great when it comes to my 1 yr olds, however we disagree on eating/food often. My boys are pigs and can handle real food in slightly smaller than normal pieces and she freaks out every time and thinks they are going to choke and cuts their food really small. I keep telling her they need to learn how to chew (and they eat extremely well) and she keeps telling me no. It stresses me out! I tried to explain Baby Led Weaning to her and she looked at me like I had two heads. I said for this next baby that's what I want to do and she thinks I'm crazy, because she would of never of done that back in her day.

@miltbaby Make sure one of those pacifiers is a wubbanub

We love those things! If having a pacifier makes me a bad mom, then so be it! Although at the one year mark, i'm trying to decide when do we break them of that habit and how. I'm all for it though, because they learn how to self soothe on their own, and self soothing means sleep.

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