TTCAL Check-In Week of 7/24

AlohaKumu · July 2017

**This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage / spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and / or stillbirth may be mentioned.**

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.

Status:

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?

Any testing coming up/any recent results?

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise?

ChloandCoco · July 2017

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. MC at 6w6d on June 5, diagnosed as a blighted ovum.

Status: WTO - CD12

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Things are going pretty good, I'm keeping busy and this month is flying-by. I'm not really struggling with anything this week, it does help that I'm waiting to O and this gives me something to focus on.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? OPKs everyday.

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? I would have to say Tom Thomson. He was a famous canadian painter and his paintings seem to capture the landscape perfectly.

rachelg777 · July 2017

@ChloandCoco I'm glad things are going well for you!! FX that you O this week.

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. MMC at 11 weeks in June, diagnosed as PMP.

Status: Benched

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? They are alright, I am still waiting for AF! It has been over 5 weeks now since my D&C so it should be any day... My HCG has also been at a low level (AF capable) for a few weeks. Rant: I am interviewing for new jobs since the move process and shadowed at one of the jobs I interviewed at last week today. It is a relatively small IR facility and apparently half the women there are pregnant and/or just had babies. The nurse I shadowed is due 12/25, 11 days apart from my due date. They were all celebrating her just finding out the gender and I just wanted to cry. They also told me not to drink the water there or I would be pregnant. Don't worry, I got some for everyone to pass around this board. lolz. Anyway, I managed to hold it together and don't even think I let on anything. Oh well, rant over. Rave: I am teaching myself to knit and I also got in a good run today!

Any testing coming up/any recent results? HCG last Monday was 6, I tested today and I am crossing my fingers for a 0! But I will be happy with anything less than 6.

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? I've been loving Ed Sheeran lately.

ChloandCoco · July 2017

@rachelg777 I'm really sorry that happened to you. It's always hard to be around pregnant women, especially when they are due close to your due date. **creepy internet hugs**

zamoraspin · July 2017

@rachelg777 I'm sorry that happened. That sounds very difficult, especially seeing another woman who is due around your EDD. It seems like most of the population does not register that women suffer from IF and mc. I hope AF gets here soon and your test is at zero. Thank you for thinking of us with that magic fertility water!
@choandcoco I'm glad that you are able to focus on ttc and I hope you O soon! Fx for this cycle for you.
***
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. Loss of first pregnancy due to mmc in mid-June.

Status: WTO

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? So far so good this week. Have been struggling with some things related to my sister that I will put in a spoiler because it needs a TW.

My younger sister is ku and is actually due today (no news on that front yet). Anyway, she and her H live far away from us and we are planning to go visit once the baby is born. She had said to me that she wanted for me to take as much time as I needed before we come to visit. I appreciate her saying that but I think it will be emotional but positive whenever we go. At the same time I was thinking about it and remembered that everyone who will be around the baby a lot needs a TDAP shot. I had talked about the TDAP when I was ku and the dr told me not to get it until I was something like 27w - in other words, no, don't get it for visiting your sister's baby, wait and get it to protect your baby. Maybe I am too optimistic, but I told my sister I want to wait to see the baby until she has her first shots because I don't want to get the TDAP right now (there are other reasons to wait too, like MH is too tied up with work stuff in August to travel). She asked if I was ku again and of course I am not. I feel a little selfish now waiting just in the hopes that I will be ku again soon enough that I should avoid the TDAP (just trying not to get two shots in less than a year).

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nope

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? Going to go with an author - Haruki Murakami. He writes in a magical realism style that I love.

rachelg777 · July 2017

*TW
@zamora_spin Just my exprience- my doc gave me the okay to get the TDAP shot when I was 10 weeks. It is required annually for my job. Of course, do whatever makes you comfortable! It's definitely best to go visit when you feel ready. End TW*

zamoraspin · July 2017

@rachelg777 Do you know by any chance know if it is safe enough to get it more than once in a year?

rachelg777 · July 2017

@zamora_spin Actually, I also asked about that. I had just received it in Oct 16 and needed it again June 17. The Dr's office said it was fine (even with pregnancy). It must be safe because my workplace was a large hospital and the policy was to get the TDAP upon hire and again/yearly in your birth month. So even if you were hired in May and received the TDAP, you had to get it again in June to be compliant.

_darth · July 2017

@ChloandCoco I am glad that you are doing well and keeping busy. I read "OPKs every day" in Snoop Dog's voice for whatever reason.

@rachelg777 I understand how tough it is to be around some who is close to your EDD. It's not pleasant. No advice, just internet hugs.

@zamora_spin It is good that your sister is being understanding and not pushing you to visit right this second. And don't feel selfish about waiting for the shot. Also, Hard Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World was amazing.

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.

Diagnosed with Asherman's (surgically managed). MC at 12 weeks in May.

Status: CD 18, TWW 3 DPO (maybe)

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I am doing well in general. A bit under the weather, but nothing tea can't cure. Starting to TTC again has brought up a lot of feelings, but that's not really a bad thing.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nah.

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? Joe Strummer. He was brilliant.

rachelg777 · July 2017

@_darth just curious, what do they do for an Asherman's diagnosis? I'm glad your feelings around TTC haven't been negative!

icecubeinthedesert · July 2017

@chloandcoco, It's great to hear that you're having a good week. Good luck moving into the TWW soon!

@rachelg777, big hugs for you. I'm sure that was really hard to get through. I've had very similar situations shortly after each of my losses and it is so tough. But seriously, pass us some of that water.

@zamora_spin, that's a tough situation with your sister. I'm sure once your niece/nephew arrives, your sister will have her hands pretty full, and it won't be something she even remembers, and I would hope she understands anyways.

@_darth, sorry I missed your inaugural post here last week, but I was lurking. I hope you find the same support here that I have. Was your Asherman's found after your loss or before it? I couldn't remember. I'm glad you had it addressed, it's a scary thing to find out about.

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. 2 losses (September 2016, March 2017)

Status: TWW (CD28/11dpo)

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Meh. I didn't post here last week because I've just been feeling kind of over this whole process. It's still early-ish in the TWW, but I'm feeling pretty bummed already and not sure if this cycle will work out. I've been putting a lot of pressure on myself for this to work because we will be TTA the next 1-2 cycles. My sister is getting married in April, and while I originally said I wasn't going to put TTC on hold for that, DH also just quit his job last week, so we are also in a bit of a tough spot financially for a bit. We can make it on my salary alone, but things will be tight, and DH has decided to go back to classes for a year to retrain in a new field. It looks like he will have time for at least a part time job while he's back, but hasn't secured anything yet.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? BFN this morning and over the weekend. Continuing to test until Thursday (14dpo), and will stop progesterone after that if still negative.

GTKY: I'm not much into art, but I do follow a friend from high school (she goes by Jordan Kay artistically). We haven't been in touch since we graduated, but I always admired her artistic style. She does a lot of ink drawings that look so casual like they are doodles in a notebook, but they are so good too. I remember her doing some of these quick draw things during class in middle school, so it's neat to see she's made a career of it. She's even designed some things for Starbucks (fun coffee mug designs, murals for the wall artwork, and gift card designs).

_darth · July 2017

@rachelg777 Usually, it's diagnosed by HSG or SHG (I'm monitored by SHG now), though in my case it was found during a medical emergency. Treatment was surgery followed by estrogen, rinse, repeat.

@icecubeinthedesert I was diagnosed before my loss, in October 2016.

I never wrote out my whole story in my intro because it's sad and messy and a giant TW. If anyone's feeling up to it, here goes.

TW: living child, postpartum complications, surgery, and loss:

I found out a week after the birth of my son. I started to hemorrhage, was rushed to the hospital, and had an emergency D&C. They found focal accerta with retained tissue due to scarring/adhesions. Part of the tissue had detached, causing the hemorrhage but they needed to remove more. I had a resection the next day. I think. Either that or 2 days later. That week is really hazy.

Anyway, they put me on estrogen to encourage the endometrium to proliferate, but a postpartum D&C and then a resection on someone with pre-existing Asherman's syndrome usually ends in something called unstuck Asherman's, where the endometrium is completely ablated. I was told that I would not be pregnant again.

But that's not the thing that happened. I ended up with Stage 3 instead. I had minor surgery to clear the internal cervical os (because the endometrium proliferated fine, with nowhere to go), and then a major surgery to remove adhesions. It went really well. The plan was to get me on a wait list for IVF if the adhesions haven't come back in 3 months.

Instead, we found out I was pregnant in February. Considering my prognosis of "never again" when this all started, we were over the moon. But at our NT scan, there was no heartbeat. No new adhesions, no placental abnormalities, nothing related to Asherman's, but no heartbeat.

It's still all very raw, but I'm coping - just doing my best to love the hell out of the people I have. It may sound a bit trite, but it's the only thing that has made a dent in the bad days. Whatever works, right?

Anyway, thank you for asking. I wish none of us had to post in this thread, but talking about it is a relief.

catlady1215 · July 2017

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.
loss in sept 2016 and dec 2016

Status:
TWW 9dpo

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?
i'm having a rough week. Yesterday probably would have been baby day for my 2nd loss. Also I have these pics of a test saved from April 2016... we were NTNP back then. I was 'late', took this test then got my period the next day. Never had anything confirmed or denied. I stuck it in FF pic converter thing yesterday and I'm pretty sure it was positive. So I guess I'm actually at 3. I can't even be excited in the TWW. I feel doomed even before I get another positive.

Any testing coming up/any recent results?
I'll prob test later this week

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise?
never been into art

@chloandcoco fingers crossed for a positive opk soon!

@rachelg777 ugh I'm so sorry. That must have been tough. Fingers crossed for you numbers. After my d&c, my period came a week or two after my numbers went negative...so alittle over a month.

@zamora_spin don't let yourself feel selfish if you hold off on going. You have to do what makes you comfortable. No matter if it's holding off just cause because it could still hurt OR if its cause of the shot. It's good hear she's being so understanding though.

@_darth good luck in the TWW! Sending so many hugs.

@icecubeinthedesert I'm sorry about the bfn. I've been feeling the same way about this cycle for some reason.. down and over it.
good luck to your DH!

dragonette505 · July 2017

@ChloandCoco So awesome you are having a great week!
@rachelg777 Yes! Lets have some of that water!! Hugs though, because its so tough going through IF and then being around pg people. PS my last cycle was so confusing after my last mc. I finally got down to 3 and got my period almost two weeks later

@zamora_spin OMG sending hugs to you too! I cant imagine how conflicted my feelings would be. Just do what helps you the most because its hard to do EVERYTHING... dealing with mc is enough.
@_darth Hope you feel better soon!
@icecubeinthedesert The TWW is brutal (especially on progesterone since it can make you FEEL pg) Im keeping my fingers crossed for you!!
@catlady1215 TWW for you too! Sorry you are feeling doomed! just sending hugs

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.
Hi, I'm me!! I've had 4 losses (last two March through May I guess)
Status: WTO so i can start estrogen priming

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Meh.... no action yet so just waiting to see what my body wants to do. I am eternally struggling with the fear i will never have a kid. Whats going well? I'm still in the game.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Starting CBE Digital monitor (ov) Tomorrow.

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? Kara Walker

rachelg777 · July 2017

@icecubeinthedesert I'm sorry for the BFN and that you circumstances will force you to TTA the next couple cycles. I hope everything goes better than you expect with YH's job. Hugs to you!

@_darth Wow, thank you for sharing your story. That sounds incredibly tough and you are one strong lady. Big hugs to you!

@catlady1215 I'm so sorry this is a tough week for you. I'll be thinking about you and have my fx for you in this TWW.

zamoraspin · July 2017

So many ladies having a tough time. I'm so sorry for all that you are going through and also thankful that you have shared.
@catlady1215 I'm so sorry you are feeling doomed. I sure hope that you are wrong. Did your dr ever respond re testing?
@_darth Thank you for sharing your story. You have really been through the ringer. I hope you are able to get ku with a rainbow soon.
@icecubeinthedesert I'm sorry you have been feeling over and about the circumstances of TTA. I hope YH is able to find a good job compatible with his school schedule soon.
@dragonette505 I hope your body cooperates and that the estrogen priming does its thing. I'm sorry you are going through those feelings.

rachelg777 · July 2017

@dragonette505 hmm mine was 3 yesterday so maybe that will be the case for me too.

I also hope your body cooperates so estrogen priming can get underway, fx so hard for you.

dragonette505 · July 2017

rachelg777 said:

@dragonette505 hmm mine was 3 yesterday so maybe that will be the case for me too. I also hope your body cooperates so estrogen priming can get underway, fx so hard for you.

Hopefully it will come sooner for you! You've been waiting long enough!

ChloandCoco · July 2017

@zamora_spinYou should do what's best for you and it sounds like your sister understands.
@_darthNow whenever I say "OPKs every day", I will always say it in Snoop Dog's voice. It's great that you found what helps you during the bad days and I agree that talking about it does help the process.
@icecubeinthedesertI'm sorry about the BFN and all the pressure you put on this cycle.
@catlady1215I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now **creepy internet hugs**
@dragonette505I'm sorry you are going through this, but good luck with your estrogen priming!

labgrand2012 · July 2017

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es) , diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. MC in June at 7.5 wks

Status: WTO - CD1

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? TW ***** One of my friends has a baby this week, and she named her my number one girls name. I know it is silly, but it really hurt to see that. She also named her first my DHs number one girls name. While I think it is weird, since she knew that those were both our girl names, its not like they are unique or anything. end TW

Other than that, I am excited to now be off the bench.

Any testing coming up/any recent results?

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise?I dont think I have a favorite artist, I am definitely drawn to the Renaissance era art. I also love landscapes and Bob Ross.

labgrand2012 · July 2017

@ChloandCoco So happy to hear things are going well for you! It is nice to have something to focus on. And yes, this month has flown by!!
@rachelg777 That sounds really hard! I am sorry you had to go through that. Hugs
@zamora_spin I think you are being smart and considerate not wanting to get her little sick but also thinking of you and your little one.
@_darth Hope you feel better soon!
@icecubeinthedesert sorry you are feeling down about this cycle. 11dpo is still early, FX for future testing.
@catlady1215 I am sorry you are having a rough time. Due dates are always very hard. Hugs. I have to keep telling myself that every pregnancy is different, and try not to let the losses overshadow the present. I know, I know, easier said than done.
@dragonette505 hoep you get to start to estrogen priming soon!

catlady1215 · July 2017

@zamora_spin she replied that we should probably get testing done. But when I asked who to call... I got no response. I'm trying to get myself to call her office. But a small part of me hopes this TWW will work and I'll be calling for nothing. Bah, I should just call. I'll call tomorrow.

@dragonette505 thank you. Sending hugs right back. Fingers crossed for some positive OPKS soon!

@labgrand2012 yay for burning the bench! Lots of luck! And that would absolutely bother me about the names also. If you used one, would she care?

ChloandCoco · July 2017

@labgrand2012 Congrats for being off the bench! I would find that very hard too if my friend used the names I wanted to use. Did she ask first or at least give you a heads up?

zamoraspin · July 2017

@labgrand2012 Ouch. I'm sorry. I would be very emotional if a friend did that TWICE knowing that those were my top names. I agree that names are not a unique thing, but talk about salt in the wound. I don't know what to say other than that really sucks.
@catlady1215 As the person who is currently waffling on whether to get a vaccination based only on the hope that I will be ku again so quick that I would be double vaccinated, I can totally understand waiting to follow-up with your dr. You do whatever is right for you. Fx this is your rainbow baby cycle and no testing is needed.

labgrand2012 · July 2017

@catlady1215, @ChloandCoco - I found out via FB both times with her announcement. I am not against using the names myself, while we are friends, we are not that close that we would be hanging out all the time. I just think it is so weird that they never mentioned those names, but we had talked about them. Oh well, first things first, GKTFU!

dragonette505 · July 2017

@labgrand2012 I have a friend who used one of my top girl names

whats worse... they are MY family names! like WHUUUT??? Pissed me off and certainly we are not close anymore. Maybe i'm an asshole, but honestly! I don't blame anyone who is hurt or angry when this happens

looeeze · July 2017

Apologies for being so late this week...

@ChloandCoco Really warming to hear that things are going well for you!!

@rachelg777 does shadowing mean you're going to get the job? gulp that water, girl! Glad your levels are almost back to 0.

@zamora_spin I dunno, Sounds like you're doing what's best for you so I hope you don't feel too bad about it. Also, I love Murakami!! One of my top three favorite authors for sure.

@_darth Thanks for sharing your story. It does sound really raw, I'm so sorry.

@icecubeinthedesert All the hugs to you, friend.

@catlady1215 Did you ever make the call?

@dragonette505 FX your body starts cooperating soon.

@labgrand2012 congrats for being unbenched! I'd be super pissed at a friend who took TWO of my names, and I'd probably keep them and name my future offspring anyway.

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/n5KtETvbAOULK/giphy.gif

catlady1215 · July 2017

@looeeze my temp dropped today (11dpo. Early for me). That's my sign to stop stalling, calling this morning.

looeeze · July 2017

@catlady1215 Good for you. FX and let us know how it goes.

labgrand2012 · July 2017

@looeeze I just need to applaud you on a great gif!! Bob Ross is amazing.

rachelg777 · July 2017

@looeeze I did get it! Not sure if I am gonna take it though.... kind of holding out for a different one I applied for that could be a long shot. Might be dumb we will see

.

dpjennifer · July 2017

Status: Benched

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I am currently home helping my sister recover from having her tonsils removed, and I usually bump at work, so sorry I haven’t responded before now.

GTKY: Who is your favorite artist, visual or otherwise? My favorite artist overall would be composer John Williams.

rachelg777 Ugh. Glad you survived the shadowing.

dragonette505 Sorry for your losses. I’m in a similar place, since I’ve had 4 losses. They’ve done a ton of testing without real results and I’m afraid I’ll never have a child as well.

catlady1215 · July 2017

I didn't it! Got my appt made for first available.. 8/29. And it's weird, even though today is shitty cause of my early temp drop. AND because of that early temp drop, I'll now probably finish another whole cycle and be a few days into the following one before I see them... but I still have a feeling of relief and I'm not feeling stabby anymore today ;-)

thank you ladies for the push!

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