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It's with a heavy heart that I join this board...

chirico3chirico3 member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
Goodmorning ladies.
I am really an emotional wreck right now, I burst into tears out of nothing... It all' happened so quickly.
I found out I was pregnant with my second on Wed. I started bleeding lightly on Thu, went to the ER but it was there and there was a heartbeat. The day after I had my hcg tested and went to my OB/GYN, and again It measured consistente with the hcg, had a heartbeat, no detachments, etc. 
Then, on Sat morning I had a dream I had to give birth and contractions were starting. I woke up and had this pain and I was bleeding. 
I am still bleeding and the pain is gone, and on Mon I'll have hcg tested again to make sure, but I know it's gone. No more nausea, nothing since yesterday. Only this pain and tiredness. 
I am especially sad b/c I thought this was my last shot. I am 43, it's not going to get easier from here and MC rates increase with age.
I am supposed to leave for vacation today. On Mon it's my birthday. The saddest birthday of my Life...

 

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Re: It's with a heavy heart that I join this board...

  • Mack2342Mack2342 member
    So sorry for your loss and that it's near your birthday.  This process sucks.  I understand the age thing.  I'm 42. I had my first loss last August and my 2nd loss in April.  I'm currently doing fertility treatments to try this time. I hope you have a quick and healthy recovery 
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  • zamoraspinzamoraspin member
    @chirico3 I'm so sorry. Just know you are not alone. The risks do go up as we get older, but also there are many healthy babies born to women in their 40's. Thinking about you and sending creepy internet hugs.
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  • robyn2201robyn2201 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. What terrible timing! I hope you can find some happiness on your birthday tomorrow. 
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

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  • beth7734beth7734 member
    I am very sorry to hear about your loss. I haven't posted before, always just read posts, but this time I felt that this discussion was aimed right at me. I just found out yesterday that my second FET did not take. I have been trying to conceive for 5 years. I had 2 chemical pregnancies naturally, then couldn't get pregnant , 5 IUIs ( on femara for 3, clomid for 2) all failed. First IVF cycle (2015)  did PGD testing, 3 out of 4 embies were normal. Miscarried after first FET, which 2 embies were used. I found out at 8 weeks, no heartbeat found. I did do a D&C, which I felt was the best decision for me. 6 months later, I was ready to go for my next FET, but was told that the embryo had disintegrated, no sign of it after the thaw. So my DH and I began a fresh IVF cycle the following month- I had 5-5 day embies, and chose not to have PGD testing. Had 3 embies placed, 2 frozen-and had a chemical pregnancy. At this point, the RE offered no testing for me, so I chose to go see Dr Mary Stephenson in Chicago- all tests came back negative, except for a EFT. She even thought my DH and I could get pregnant naturally with the use of vaginal progesterone timed out. This of course did not work after 4 tries. So we decided to move forward again with IVF, and just did our FET with the last 2 remaining embryos- which did not work. I am devestated and am trying to figure out the next step. We finally have insurance that will cover a whole cycle, so I do plan on doing a third, but I'm 40 and scared. At this point, I don't know if I should have PGD done again, or if I should just do a fresh cycle. We have discussed using donor eggs in the future, but I still want to try with mine. I just feel scared, and I realize I am not alone. I feel better when I read these posts, I wish none of us had to ever go through this, but I am hopeful it will work out one day.
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  • leahcimmichaelleahcimmichael member
    @beth7734 and @chirico3 So sorry to hear about all your losses and struggles. You definitely aren't alone. Sending good thoughts your way. 
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  • babybakiebabybakie member
    I am so very sorry for your loss and that you are going through this. I know how feel by the age thing. I'll be 43 in October. The pregnancy I lost last month was my first and only. You are in my thoughts and prayers. ❤️
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  • ELeighMayELeighMay member
    edited July 2017
    I'm sorry for your loss.  I'm in a similar situation. Went to the clinic on Wednesday at 8wk with spotting was told everything looked fine and spotting is normal. Did HCG that came back at 9500 and told that at that level they should see cardiac activity. Had a slightly heavier spotting Friday and went back to the clinic.  They did an ultrasound and detected no heartbeat said it measured at 5wk 6d. Saturday was my birthday and had to spend it surrounded by people that knew I was pregnant. It was the worst birthday ever. We have two teenagers and a 23mo old. I just turned 37 and time is running out for us.  We really wanted this lo. I go to the clinic Monday morning to meet with my doctor to go over options, and I plan to do D&C. I stopped spotting Friday and have no cramping. This doesn't feel real,  I'm just heartbroken.
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