January 2018 Moms

Mental/Physical state a month after childbirth

This one's for the women who have already had babies. What kind of mental/emotional/physical state were you in a month after giving birth? I'm a plaintiff in a lawsuit for an accident I had more than two years ago, and the trial is currently scheduled for February - about 6 or so weeks after I have the baby. I'm a FTM - this scares me. I have no idea if I'll be in any state to do well on a witness stand, and the stakes are really high.

Re: Mental/Physical state a month after childbirth

  • It varies so much from woman to woman and even with each birth.   My first I was fantastic, honestly probably better than my old self.  My third I had ppd so bad that we were looking in to inpatient treatment.  
  • Physically, I was basically almost healed by that time. My stitches from a 2nd degree tear had basically fallen out, although I was still in a little bit of pain. Mentally and emotionally, I was a crying mess until maybe 5 or 6 weeks PP. Like every little thing would make me cry. I also was in a sleep deprivation fog so I didn't always really comprehend what was going on around me, beyond taking care of a newborn. 

    Not all women are the same though-hopefully some other moms can weigh in who had a different experience! Would there be any way to get the trial pushed back just in case?
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  • I felt totally normal, emotionally and physically. 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

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  • I had a fourth degree tear (more on that in other posts later I am sure) and was going on walks a week after, running three weeks after, and totally healed exactly at 6 weeks (done bleeding too mostly). Emotionally, I had a little bit of the "baby blues" (nothing as serious as PPD and entirely normal), but by 6 weeks it was completely manageable and did not cloud my judgment. I honestly think it partly depends on many things (if you have a traumatic birth) and honestly, how your baby--and thus you--are sleeping at that point. As others noted, it's moderately subjective... BUT there is a reason doctors give you the green light to have sex/resume normal activity at 6 weeks (for vaginal delivery--8 for c-section) and that is because generally (so many exceptions) women are getting into a groove and back to themselves at that point. 
    *TW*

    DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015

    DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017

    BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019

    BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020 

  • I agree that it totally depends on the woman. Physically, I was totally fine by six weeks. Mentally is a different story. I was still a wreck at that point.
  • I was definitely not in the right state of mind at 6 weeks. Lack of sleep is no joke.

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

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    EDD: 1/6/2018
    Eva Jane: 7/23/2014


  • I was in a peaceful state emotionally and physically by 6 weeks. I'm terrified for a different experience this time but I won't know until we cross that bridge.

     
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  • Related question.... Did any of the STMs here do placenta encapsulation? And if so, do you feel like it helped with your mental and emotional state?
  • We moved around 6 weeks PP with my first baby. It was kind of a huge mess from the unorganization but we made it through fine. I did not have baby blues issues with either of my babies. I felt really content after they were born. I was pretty sleepy from the prolonged crappy night sleep though. With my first baby I had a lot of trouble nursing and still was dealing with some serious nipple pain. Or it was at least resolving then. That was a big source of stress for me. Nursing with my second baby was no trouble though. I just had a lot of trouble with the breastfeeding learning curve that first time. All that to say, my issues at 6 weeks were nursing troubles and sleepiness, but overall I felt like myself. 
  • TBH I don't remember it very clearly anymore... I started going to a moms' group at 2 weeks, so it was a production but I was definitely out & about on my own. One month was around the time we figured out a sleep schedule that actually helped him sleep at night (instead of witching from 10pm to 2am) and do longer stretches, so things started to get better on the sleep deprivation front.
    At 6 weeks I think my big concern would be feeding baby, if you're gonna be nursing or pumping - how long will you have to be there, can you keep LO with you until you go on the stand or would you have to leave him/her for the day, if you have to pump do they have facilities...
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  • With my first I was a mess at that point because he was a bad sleeper. My second was nearly sleeping through the night at three weeks old and I felt totally back to normal a month in. It's such a roll of the dice, I'm sorry. 
  • After DD1 I was very anxious and sleep deprived. She had reflux and would scream for hours at night until I finally got her on Zantac at 7 weeks. After that things calmed down. DD2 was a breeze, I was feeling normal mentally and physically. 
    DD1: 2/28/12
    DD2: 9/12/13
    Baby #3: Due January 2018

  • I had an emergency c-section, and a month later I still had a lot of pain. I had trouble getting up out of chairs and out of bed without help, and it was difficult to turn and bend at certain angles without looking very strange. 

    There were times during the healing process when it hurt more later than it did shortly after he was born. That surprised me. 
  • I also had an emergency C-section.  I was lucky, even though I had complications in the hospital I felt physically good to go once I got home.  Standing up from sitting and getting out of bed were tricky for a while, but other than that I didn't really have any significant or long lasting pain.

    Mentally, I was exhausted.  DD was a good sleeper for the most part (we got a routine and schedule figured out pretty early), but I was still a walking zombie for a while adjusting to my "new normal." 

    For me, I didn't have any baby blues or PPD until later, it was like it was delayed for me.  I went back to work was great, and for whatever reason, about 9 months after birth it hit me like a TON of bricks.  It was awful and brutal, but I saw the warning signs and was able to ask for help before I went too far down that scary path.

    I think the only piece of advice I can offer you is to listen to yourself.  Listen to your body and listen to your mind.  If you need to ask for a continuance in your case, do it.  You need to be healthy for you and your new family, the lawsuit can wait.

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  • @TInman87 I did placenta encapsulation and I didn't suffer from any ppd. I got them delivered about a week after I gave birth and the first couple of days after birth I was weirdly nervous about who touched my baby, I'm not sure if the capsules helped that go away but it only lasted like 3-4 days. I also noticed when I finished them, I NEEDED to do skin to skin with my DD, even though I wasn't breastfeeding anymore, so it was a little bit of a withdrawal. I'm definitely doing it again this time around. Again, I'm not sure if they work or if it's a placebo effect but I felt great taking them :)
  • I felt pretty good at 6 weeks. It was around that time that the baby started sleeping for longer stretches at night but I don't know how comfortable I would feel being in court. So much depends on the person and the baby. There are so many variables. Any way you can get an extension? 
  • I agree with PPs. It really varies woman to woman, and birth to birth.  At a month with my first; I was easily irritable, but stable. At a month with my second; I was such an emotional mess, I couldn't translate thought into coherant conversation. I had severe PPD  & anxiety the second go round.

    @TInman87 I have not done placenta encapsulation, and will not be doing it this time around either. 
    Joey 06.05.2010, MC Jan 2014-EDD 09.11.2014, Aurelia 08.24.2015 (lost twin ~12 weeks), Ectopic Loss Feb 2016, EDD 01.03.2018
  • Thanks everyone for all of your responses. This is kind of what I expected - it all depends. My lawyer is going to push it to as late as possible, and he said if I have medical complications or something we can ask for a continuance. Obviously we're still hoping this settles before then so it'll hopefully be a non-issue.
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