Trying to Get Pregnant
awaurand
member
Newb with a question (edited)
awaurand
member
Good morning ladies! (Let's try this again without the iPhone emojis!)
Newbie here...kind of. I'm Autumn, *almost* 30, a high risk OB nurse, married for nine years, and I am currently TTC baby #2. My DS is five years old and tells me every day that he wants a baby sister (like he has a choice
) Bear with me, I haven't been on the boards since DS was six months old and am feeling like quite the old lady trying to recall all of the abbreviations and such, but here we go.
I had a Mirena IUD in since July 2012 and had it removed last month on May 1st. We did not TTC last month as I wanted my period to return and somewhat regulate prior to trying. It finally came on June 6th and according to my Clue app I should be in my fertile window now. I have never used OPKs before, my first pregnancy was a very welcome surprise without charting or anything. My OPK yesterday showed a faint LH line and today it is as dark as the control line. Does this mean I am currently ovulating or does ovulation occur after the LH surge? Should we be having sex daily or every other day? Y'all. I'm fairly clueless with this stuff...I know all about pregnancy itself related to my work but pre-conception makes me feel like an idiot. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated! TIA...I look forward to getting to know you guys!
Newbie here...kind of. I'm Autumn, *almost* 30, a high risk OB nurse, married for nine years, and I am currently TTC baby #2. My DS is five years old and tells me every day that he wants a baby sister (like he has a choice
) Bear with me, I haven't been on the boards since DS was six months old and am feeling like quite the old lady trying to recall all of the abbreviations and such, but here we go.I had a Mirena IUD in since July 2012 and had it removed last month on May 1st. We did not TTC last month as I wanted my period to return and somewhat regulate prior to trying. It finally came on June 6th and according to my Clue app I should be in my fertile window now. I have never used OPKs before, my first pregnancy was a very welcome surprise without charting or anything. My OPK yesterday showed a faint LH line and today it is as dark as the control line. Does this mean I am currently ovulating or does ovulation occur after the LH surge? Should we be having sex daily or every other day? Y'all. I'm fairly clueless with this stuff...I know all about pregnancy itself related to my work but pre-conception makes me feel like an idiot. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated! TIA...I look forward to getting to know you guys!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Newb with a question (edited)
Good luck!
Just an FYI since I'm guessing that it's a problem you already ran into, you can't use any emoji other than the ones that The Bump provides. If you put one in from your phone, everything from that point on disappears.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
- post an intro into the actual intro thread. People will be really nice and welcoming and say hi.
- respond to any of the two week waiting, waiting to ovulate, chart stalk, or trying for a second current threads. In those threads you can post what's currently going on, get to know people and ask the specific questions that you have and people will help you out there.
Typically one off threads are discouraged, especially if it's not a very unusual topic.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
You were given such great advice! The only thing people admonished you on was starting a brand new thread. But you have to realize even in my just 4 months in this community, there have been countless people who've come through and introduced themselves and then never come back. The culture here on TTGP has been groomed over time to try and create a real community instead of a place for people to shout out their information and then leave, never to be heard from again. Even in just 4 months, I've come to care about people's lives, their relationships, their struggles at work or with friends, and especially their unique TTC journeys. Now imagine that as a 4 month-er, I'm still a fresh face around here. Many woman have been here for over a year, daily encouraging others and venting their own stresses. New faces are absolutely still absolutely welcome though. I have asked so so so many questions and received patient, thoughtful, and thorough answers (even when they were total noob questions!).
But the only way this kind of community can flourish is if there is a little bit of order. Just like every message board, there are cultures and practices unique to TTGP. That is why you were asked to read the newbie guide and given helpful instructions on where this kind of question is appropriate. I would also add that it was helpful to me to lurk for even just a week or two when I first joined, so that I didn't butt in to people's conversations without any background knowledge. So that I knew how not to hurt people during this sensitive and emotionally fraught journey.
As for your question, I googled "basics of trying to get pregnant" and this third hit on that search will probably suit you well: https://www.verywell.com/how-to-get-pregnant-for-beginners-1960276
Me: 28 | H: 29
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 March 2017
Dx: PCOS - March 2018
IUI #1: April 2018 BFN
IUI #2: May 2018
Yeah, no. I'm not your personal Google assistant. None of us are. You got very nicely directed to intro in the proper place (I even provided a link for you) do some reading, and do some basic educating yourself before asking us questions in the proper places. Shockingly, we don't sit around just waiting for a rando who can't possibly do any reading on their own to come demand that information be delivered on a silver platter.
If you think this is snark, I recommend staying away from all real people on the internet. Everyone was nice and helpful. Get over yourself.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
The women in this group are amazing - but we don't appreciate being treated like Google by strangers. If you'd done any researching, lurking, or just read the damn instructions on your opk, you'd be able to find your answer. It's been addressed approximately 1569519836159 times on this board. Or, you can read and follow the rules here, get to know us, and learn a lot along the way.
Or, you know, be a special snowflake and ignore the rules, get flamed (very gently I might add), and decide that we're all a bunch of meanies. That's cool too. It's been a hot minute since we had a GBCB.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
--------------------------------
LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby!
--------------------------------
Me: 33 | DH: 41
Married: March 2016
TTC #1/IUD out January 2017
PCOS dx January 2018
Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018
BFP 3/10/2018!
-------------------------------
I do wish you well on your TTC journey and hope your kid gets the little sis he wants. Good luck.
*eta for clarity*
--------------------------------
LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby!
--------------------------------
Me: 33 | DH: 41
Married: March 2016
TTC #1/IUD out January 2017
PCOS dx January 2018
Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018
BFP 3/10/2018!
-------------------------------
Good luck to you, honestly we do hope you end up sticking around
TTC #2 - August 2016
MFI
IUI #1-3 BFN
BFP 4/21/18 MMC 6/11/18
So, I get it. You come here, the boards are confusing, and you probably expect you won't be here that long. I don't think anyone comes here expecting to be here more than a few months. But isht happens! Some people struggle to get pregnant. Some people get pregnant but suffer losses. Some people have to start trying to avoid due to extenuating circumstances. And for anyone who has been here for more than a year, it's like, good Lord, why do I have to keep answering the same exact questions over and over? Why don't these new people value my time as much as they value their own?
I know it can feel like you're being singled out, but there are literally so many threads exactly like this one. You don't need to delete - no one wants that. The hope is that moving forward new people will read this and say, "Oh, I get it, I'll intro on the newbie thread and participate in the weekly threads!"
There are plenty of active members here who have intro'd improperly. It's fine! Everyone is human! So join us. We're a fun group.
If you'd read the Newbie Guide, you would've known to expect the answers you received. I don't think skimming the Newbie Guide or lurking at all is too much to do if you're honestly interested in being part of a community.
TBH, I don't see any snark in any of the posts before you responded with what could've been (and apparently was?) a GBCB. After that, all gloves are off. Because, seriously, you even had someone offer to help you via PMs -- she doesn't need to, but she's kind enough to offer. And, you responded with a GBCB.
That doesn't scream "I can handle snark" to me.
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
Married: 04/05/15
TTC since: 02/16/16
As for your followup posts, you do know that we can see your post history, right? You have made zero mention of a prior screenname and have had this one for a decade. I see that you have started two discussions (for those of you on mobile it was "Possibly Pregnant?" on BOTB). It also shows that you have eight replies, seven of which are from this post. I'm having a hard time with the story here. Or that part on the trying to be the bigger man when that, above, was your response to people directing you to a wealth of knowledge so you can learn the answer to this question as well as a number of other things you would eventually want/need to know.
Don't worry about us being sad that you "don't have time on a regular basis to deal with arguing behind computer keys (or phone keys)." Because your time is valuable and ours isn't so of course we have nothing better to do than to be your Google. We're all crying into our wine glasses over here but we'll be alright eventually.
edit: typos
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
140 calories and only 5 carbs!
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
This really isn't hard.
People mess up and ignore the newbie thread all the time. That's fine. What's not fine is trying to argue with an established community about the norms (which have been roughly the same for many years now). If you don't like the culture of this community that's fine! But maybe quit arguing?
Either be super cool, apologize, get over it, go do a damn intro, OR don't join. That's fine. But doing anything else is pointless.
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