STM+ check-in 5/31

cait5413 · May 2017

I think it's been a little while since we had one of these, so here we go!

How far along are you?

How old are your other kids?

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now?

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?

cait5413 · May 2017

How far along are you? 11 weeks

How old are your other kids? DD will be 10 months in 3 days

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? DD is now crawling and pulling up and getting into everything! Wrangling two is going to be fun. She's also gained a little weight/grown, so I just keep thinking about how I won't be able to pick her up after my c-section.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Mostly excited to have a little baby again and watch all the milestones happen. DD seems to be growing up so fast.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? We're still figuring out our traditions as a family, since we don't live by our families. Last year, we did Christmas early at our house, then went to my parents' and celebrated actual Christmas with them--we always do Christmas Eve at my Aunt's house with many of my cousins, many of whom have kids (including one born 1 day after my DD) so it's fun to see all of the kiddos together, and then Christmas Day with my parents, brother & sis in law, etc. Then, DH's parents came down for New Year's (they live in the northeast, we live in MS), so DD really had 3 Christmas celebrations. I'd like to do that again, but I am not sure I will be up for the 3 hour drive to my parents' (now just my mom) or how I will feel having baby around everyone so early. When DD was born, riding in cars after my C-section made me nauseated, and I don't remember how long that lasted. LO will probably be scheduled for a c-section somewhere around the 13th, so it's not a lot of time til Christmas. It makes me sad to miss it, but it might also be nice to have a smaller celebration with just us, and then DH's parents will come down for New Year's again (and to help out with the baby for a while). I'm looking forward to doing holiday baking with the kiddos when they get older.

acholtz06 · May 2017

How far along are you? 10 weeks

How old are your other kids? DD turned 2 in March

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? DD has chicken pox so that's been fun

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Our good friends just had a baby and we FaceTimed with them yesterday to meet her, and DD loved the baby. She's still talking about it today so that makes me really excited for when our baby gets here

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? My parents gave us an ornament every year and then we took them all once we moved out. DD has gotten her ornament for the past 2 years and I'm excited to continue this with both kids. It's the one present that gets opened on Christmas Eve.

tmk0325 · May 2017

How far along are you? 11w5d

How old are your other kids? The twins just turned 11 months last week!

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? They are getting very mobile and are starting to stand. We live in a small 700 sq ft apartment and there is literally no where for them to go! We'll be stuck here til probably about March I'm thinking!

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Currently I'm overwhelmed thinking of the logistics. I am excited for them to all be close in age though.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/I don't have a ton of help from my SO due to him working long hours/days/weekends, so I'm really concerned how the hell I"m going to manage 3 under 2 and working full time.

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? I too do ornaments every year. I'll continue that with this baby.

anewadventure · May 2017

@cait5413 i'm with you on picking up bebe after c-section. however in my case, my DS will be three, and he is very communicative and will understand when i explain to him why i can't pick him up for a while. i hope your DD is an early verbal child for your sake, it really is SO much easier in some aspects when you can speak to your kid and it understands english. i mean, your kid might not want to listen to what you have to say, but there is a lot less of trying to guess why your baby is upset. she might not talk much at that age (or maybe she will!) but they can understand YOU a lot earlier than you can understand HER.

@acholtz06 just curious, did your DD get the varicella vaccine as scheduled?

@tmk0325 when do you break ground on your house?

anewadventure · May 2017

How far along are you? 13w2d

How old are your other kids? DS is 2y 8mo

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? have you guys told your current children about your pregnancy?

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : i'm so excited to see DS with a sibling.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ my sister borrowed my maternity clothes last year. apparently she literally bought one pair of pants and just wore all my clothes. good for her, i guess, but she is a smidge bigger than me and really not careful with laundry. between that and the amount of wear and tear, the clothes i got back are just a fucking shambles. i am so frustrated because i already feel like i have nothing to wear right now and it is expensive to start over. i'm also not intending to have more kids so it seems like a waste. blehhhh.

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?
I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!! tramping through the fields to cut down a real christmas tree. making 1000000 cookies. decorating the house. sharing the month with our bazillion family members. collecting ornaments special to each person. caroling. old christmas movies.

Jellybelly119 · May 2017

@tmk0325 I'm super concerned about logistics and I'll only have 2! How do you get your twins out of the car now? I feel like such an idiot, but how the hell do you pull that off? If I put DS down, he'd take off. If I'm holding the baby, how do I unbuckle him??

@anewadventure I let 2 friends borrow a bunch of stuff last year and I'm pretty annoyed that I did. I basically told one of them she needed to buy me new leggings since she stretched them out like crazy wearing them every day. I feel like a jerk, but I did you a favor! Don't ruin my shit and think I'm just going to take it back like that.

Jellybelly119 · May 2017

How far along are you? 12+6

How old are your other kids? DS will be 16 months next week

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? I was holding my BFF's 7 month old this weekend and DS got PISSED, tried to push him out of the way, climbed in my lap, and refused to move. So this should be fun!

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I'm hoping once the initial shock wears off, they'll be best friends!

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ Double strollers. Are you leaning towards front-to-back or side-to-side? Any recommendations?

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? My mom's whole family goes to my aunt's for a huge, Italian Christmas Eve every year. Last year their dog bit DS! I think my mom may offer to host instead, but between that, the new baby, and the drama, I'm kind of looking forward to skipping it. We'll see how it plays out.

anewadventure · May 2017

@Jellybelly119 yeah, i was taken really by surprise. silly me. for you other ladies, if you are going to lend your maternity clothes to anyone you should absolutely be selective in what you give or pick out your favorite pieces to hold back; or, have zero expectations that you'll be able to wear stuff again. partly my problem is i don't like to drop a lot of money on this stuff so it was lower quality and not able to hold up to the many months on end of weekly wear and harsh washing.

also @Jellybelly119 i only have DS right now but my friends with multiples under a certain age swear by baby wearing to help juggle all your kids. it is a PROCESS but no one wants their kids run over in the parking lot. have a wrap or carrier ready to go, or at least a stroller, and work your way one at a time through unbuckling and resecuring your kids in a new method of transportation. lord help you when you need to go to target / the grocery store / anywhere. once your DS is over two, start to work with him on how important it is to stay touching you and/or the car in a parking lot. we put a large circle magnet on the side of the car and he knows the rule is to stand with his hands on the magnet until it is time to hold my hand to walk through the parking lot. you can still have scary moments (because, really, what kid listens all the time?) but is has helped. GL!

AND I SECOND THE QUESTION re: double strollers. we currently have a single BOB revolution and love it more than life itself but the double is a two-wide setup and it seems impossible for navigating any kind of store or busy place, the metro, etc. any and all thoughts, recs, likes and dislikes on double strollers would be great.

cait5413 · May 2017

@anewadventure I hope she understands somewhat! She is starting to understand "NO" at least, so we'll see how things develop! We have kinda told DD a baby is coming, but of course it means nothing to her at that age!

@tmk0325 & @Jellybelly119 yes, the logistics--ugh! I am pretty sure I am going to have DH start dropping DD off at daycare once baby arrives and then I will drop off LO later (once LO is in day care). If I have to do them both, I figure I will snap out LO's carseat, go over to DD's side, put the baby on the ground between my feet (in the seat), and help her out. I guess we'll all figure it out!

cait5413 · May 2017

Oh, as far as double strollers, I have no idea. I think at first we may get by with putting the baby in the carrier (we have a lillebaby) and DD in the stroller that we have. I contemplated just getting one of those stand and ride platforms, but that was when I thought DD would be older when LO arrived. So, we may just get a double umbrella stroller when the baby is a little older. https://www.lucieslist.com/best-double-umbrella-stroller/ We mostly use the stroller for walks in the neighborhood now.

I'm open to any thoughts on this topic, because I really don't know what to do!

I think a side by side is preferable for kids of different ages since the front-back ones seem to have smaller seats that the older kid may outgrow, but I'm not sure that's accurate--just my impression.

Kirss · May 2017

How far along are you? 10 weeks

How old are your other kids? 4 going on 14

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now?

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : DD is starting to tell her friends at school about the baby in mommy’s tummy, I think it’s adorable and I really love seeing how excited she is, however not excited enough to do diapers.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ I also have questions about a double stroller, when DD is 5 and baby is well baby is a double needed? What would you suggest?

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? Since DD has been born we’ve been going to Greenfield Village Holiday Night s, and I absolutely love that, and plan on continuing to do this forever. Other things we’ve started with DD is Christmas Eve movie night, where she opens a gift and it’s new pajamas for all of us, a movie, popcorn and hot chocolate. I hope to find something specifically birthday related for this baby, I love birthdays and I think they should be celebrated to the fullest, and I don’t want them to get lost in the holiday chaos.

flowerpower5838 · May 2017

How far along are you? 11 weeks

How old are your other kids? 14 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? I have been so agitated lately that I am nervous about adding a second kid to the equation. I know part of it is being overtired from the pregnancy exhaustion, but man oh man DS has really found his voice and has taking to just yelling ALL OF THE TIME. It's driving me bananas.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Same as always, I am very excited that our kids will be pretty close in age/

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? I have a few: Like so many, we always got Christmas PJs the night before and a Christmas movie, so I'd like to continue that tradition. As a child, we never did the gingerbread houses or caroling or anything so I would like to do that as the kids become old enough. I would like to BREAK the tradition of going over to MIL's every.single.Christmas Eve, or at the very least, leave at a decent hours. My ILs are time hogs and then if you try to leave "early" they are guilt trippers. At least I like them I guess. OH and I have never had a live Christmas tree so I am hoping we can start doing that, too.

Jellybelly119 · May 2017

@anewadventure Yeah, I guess I forgot about BWing a bit! DS loves to be in the cart so much that we've barely used the Tula for errands in months, but we rocked it all the time when he was little. Thanks for the magnet idea!! He'll be 2 next February, so hopefully we can work on some kind of system then.

Here's the issues I've identified with my ridiculous amount of research on double strollers:
1. All of the side by side joggers with great storage and all that are huge. We walk to the center of town for shopping, restaurants, etc and I need to fit in the doorway!
2. The slimmer side by sides would be tight, and I can see the kids fighting. Also, they don't all lay flat, so putting a big bucket seat in there would limit DS's space even more.
3. The front to back with the extra seat in front says it may be hard to "pop" up onto curves with the weight over the front wheel and our sidewalks are a mess in some spots.
4. The front to back with multiple configurations: I can't see a kid enjoying only being able to look at the back of the seat in front of them!

I'm totally over thinking this, and I'm aware I sound like a crazy person.

sjis · May 2017

How far along are you?

9 weeks, 2 days - due dec 31!

How old are your other kids?

DD is 3 yrs 5 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now?

Mostly the juggling act of time managing since I work from home.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :

happy to to have another little baby face in the house! Having a sibling for DD

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?

tmk0325 · May 2017

@Jellybelly119 and @cait5413 You pose a valid question! So we keep our double stroller in my vehicle at all times (we have the Contours Double Elite if you want to look it up) and I pop it open, then take one baby out and strap him in and then take the other baby out and strap him in. No idea what I will do with three! Get a triple stroller!?

For daycare, we thankfully use a private in home lady and from my car to the house is about 5 ft. So I take one baby out, carry him in and give him to her and then go back out and get the other one. They are used to waiting for each other. We are also in a rural area, so I don't worry about leaving him there with the car running for a minute. I'm hoping to use the same lady for all three, although I haven't asked her yet (nor does she know we are expecting again). If I were in a larger area/daycare center, i would use the stroller to take them in and out and leave the stroller there.

Also @cait5413 if we build the tentative plan is to pour the basement in October and they would start working on it and getting it framed up in Nov/December and do all the finishing through the winter. We live in WI, so it gets pretty cold! Move in would be March if that all worked out and nothing was delayed. My hope would be before I went back to work from maternity leave.

acgonzalez22 · May 2017

How far along are you? 13.7 weeks

How old are your other kids? DS is 22 months this week

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? I stayed at home with DS for the 1st year and want to with this one but... man, I love my job too much to quit.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I just can't wait to add to my family of 3 and I also can't wait to be in the 2nd tri tomorrow.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ My random is that I'm having such a difficult time deciding between 2 schools for DS to start in August.

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? Xmas Eve pj's and singing around the fire. Also, making Christmas cookies the week before.

@anewadventure We have told DS but he doesn't really understand (22 mths). He just keeps calling me "big belly" and patting me. LOLOL.

@Jellybelly119 Thank you for the info for the strollers!

Jellybelly119 · May 2017

@tmk0325 I love this one for 3! The Valco Baby Neo Twin is at the top of my list for now. I'm a sucker for anything with a good review on lucie's List.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B01GD3JNSW/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1496259121&sr=8-2&keywords=valco+baby+joey+seat&dpPl=1&dpID=41tkTlr0XVL&ref=plSrch

Jellybelly119 · May 2017

@acgonzalez22 "big belly" is so funny and sweet!

cait5413 · May 2017

@tmk0325 I will be thinking of you! We moved when I was 6 months pregnant last time and we did a renovation, which was supposed to be done when we moved in and wasn't, of course. I had many tear-filled calls/shouting matches with our contractors thanks to pregnancy hormones, so I hope your build goes smoothly and/or that your DH can handle most of the communication (my hubby did most of it, but whew! it was still stressful). At least you won't be living in it while construction is going on. The nice thing is that hopefully it will be a relatively easy move for you--I know your current place is relatively small, so not too much to box up, hopefully!

@Jellybelly119 LOVE Lucie's list!

andipandicWed121369 · May 2017

How far along are you? 13 weeks. Bring on 2nd trimester!

How old are your other kids? She's 6 and a half.

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? She's starting to express concerns about being replaced by the baby and having some behaviors that we only see when she's anxious. Trying to talk about it as much as we can and be reassuring but part of me wants to tell her that we have no idea what we're doing either.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Everyday that baby stays in is a miracle. I'm trying not to focus on how ancient I am and instead celebrate the long waited for baby.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ Will I ever feel well rested again? What have I done?

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?
I work at a church and I'm super excited about having this year's Christmas Eve off but next year it'll be my busiest time of the year again. Throwing a birthday party and Christmas is probably enough for me!

failuretofly · June 2017

How far along are you? 12 weeks

How old are your other kids? DS is 16 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now? Ugh DS is still fighting bedtime. We went back to 2 naps cause I couldn't deal with his afternoon/evening meltdowns. But I don't know if I can deal with this either. Anyone have any advice for the 2 to 1 nap transition???

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : maybe once DS is sleeping well again

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/ I'm totally with you guys on the double vs single stroller debate. I also LOVE my Bob Revolution Flex and can't imagine giving it hp

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start? Well I have a lot of stuff I do on my own that I can't wait to have the kiddos involved in. Making cookies, getting a fresh tree, building a gingerbread house from scratch.

anewadventure · June 2017

@kvacmak my advice for the nap transition is tequila.

but, seriously, it is just rough. it can be frustrating to not have a schedule but usually it's best to try to go with his cues for each day. and on the days he takes one nap, make sure he doesn't get up too late from it and that he goes to bed EARLIER than normal for a while. i hope he is naturally giving up the morning nap and not the afternoon one?

tmk0325 · June 2017

@Jellybelly119 while that is a cool contraption for a stroller, I can't fathom spending $900 on another stroller when we already have a $300 one. I may try to find a used single stroller for if we all go out at a time, then the boys could go in the double and the baby in a single. I think by the time they would all be ready to go in one together the boys will probably want to walk. I have one that doesn't like sitting still for very long.

wabash15 · June 2017

@kvacmak I second @anewadventure The two to one nap transition is rough for a little while but it will get better.

Jellybelly119 · June 2017

@tmk0325 Oh, I agree; it's an insane price. I can not believe how much strollers cost! I'm a huge fan of BST and tag sales though. I wouldn't spend money on a new stroller again unless I got a crazy good deal.

acholtz06 · June 2017

@anewadventure She did get her vaccine. Luckily it was a pretty mild case because of it. The spots were mostly on her limbs and she barely had a fever. She is feeling much better already and the spots are already clearing up! The Dr said that once they've had the vaccine, it usually shows like that (not on the trunk and mostly on the limbs).

anewadventure · June 2017

@acholtz06 i'm glad she is feeling better already!

eazybreezy225 · June 2017

How far along are you?
13 weeks 6 days

How old are your other kids?
DD1, 7.5 yo. DD2, 4.5yo. DD3, 3 yo.

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now?
Not so much. I've been experiencing more ligament pain this pregnancy but no big deal.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
Being a 4TM is the best. I love how excited my kids are about the new baby.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/
The finish line to 2nd Trimester is tomorrow! Finally.

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?
yes!! As a practicing Pagan, I celebrate Yule, I cannot wait to do all the Yule traditions with LO and my kiddos.

Marley629 · June 2017

How far along are you?
12 weeks (it felt like both an eternity and somehow flew by)

How old are your other kids?
He's 3.5 and will be 4 in September. I just booked his 4th bday party and I'm so going to bawl at it lol

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM or questions about things your children are going through now?
I'm just really worried that I'm not being the best mom I can be right now to him since I've been so sick. I'm finally starting to feel a little better so im
praying it continues and I can give him all my attention

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
He's so excited to be a big brother. We will announce sometime this week and I can't wait for him to be a part of that

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions/

Those who are having RCS, when do you think you will introduce new LO to his/her sibling(s). With DS, I had emergency c-section, and I was a hot mess that whole day. I don't remember it at all. I want to remember the first time they meet but I also want them to meet like asap. Im torn (we have so much time to think about this but I'm a worrier)

GTKY: Since we've got December babies, are there any holiday traditions you're eager to share/start?

Christmas is a big thing in our house; we cut down a tree, order pizza and decorate, I do the Elf on a Shelf craziness and I really wanna up my game this year since DS starting getting into it last year, advent calendars, drive thru light shows, polar express and multiple Santa visits lol We also have a big Christmas Eve party every year with DH's family. I'm nervous about that this year with a newborn so it will be interesting to see what we end up doing.

failuretofly · June 2017

@anewadventure
that's the thing is he doesn't seem inclined to drop either nap! it's bedtime that he fights. I'm starting to wonder if it's less about naps and more about the fact that dad gets home ~20 min before bedtime and he just wants to play with him instead...

cait5413 · June 2017

@Marley629 Having a RCS this time. It kinda depends on when it's scheduled. Last time, I had a failed induction, so the CS was at 5:30 pm. I got to see DD for a couple minutes after, then they took her for a bath and kept her for HOURS because she was cold after the bath. I was so pissed and I'm not letting that happen this time. So, it was about 9:30 at night before I really got to cuddle her. With a scheduled section, I assume it will be earlier in the day. If it's in the morning, I will probably have DD come to meet the baby that afternoon, after DH and I have some one-on-one time with the new LO. If it's in the later afternoon, maybe not until the next day. I didn't feel too bad after mine though (just an epidural; they didn't put me under), so I'm not too worried about it. The worst part was being HANGRY. They made me eat my last meal before my induction started, so I hadn't eaten since about 24 hours BEFORE the CS and then they didn't bring me any food til the next morning. Best tasting Jello I ever had, though.

anewadventure · June 2017

@kvacmak it's probably both. if he's somewhat ready to give up one nap but still taking both, he might not be quite tired enough at bedtime. and with daddy coming home, forget it man! my DS held on to both naps til just past 18mo before transitioning. if you get that far you can always start to transition out the morning nap yourself...

@cait5413 wut. if your fresh dd was having trouble regulating her temperature, they should have had you do skin to skin, not keep her away. ridic. i'm with you on the hangry. my failed induction was 40 hours and i hadn't eaten for more than 12 before that, then c-section, then liquids only. OH EM GEE. GIMME THE FOODS.

cait5413 · June 2017

@anewadventure I know! I was like, bring her to me and I will warm her up!!! I'm going to talk to my doc about it this time because that is not happening again. I'll have DH break her out of the nursery if I have to. I was also sick from the anesthesia, and they gave me IV anti-nausea meds while they were sewing me up, but when I got to the room, I told the nurse I was starting to feel sick again. She took her sweet time and I threw up twice (not much to throw up, but still painful) before she got them to me. Other than those two bumps, our nurses were great and everything was fine, but I am still really pissed they kept her from me for so long for no good reason.

andipandicWed121369 · June 2017

I'm wondering when to let my DD meet the new baby too. I feel very strongly that no one else will hold the baby before her but I don't want to be so out of it when she comes that I freak her out. I think I'm going to ask my doc for a suggestion next time I'm in for an appointment. I'm worrying about it too but I think probably because there are so few things I have control over right now and I'm a total control freak!

failuretofly · June 2017

I'm resurrecting this thread to share that DS has successfully transitioned to one nap, and is now successfully sleeping 2 1/2 - 3 hours in the afternoon! Gives me a nice break and time for a nap myself if I need it! Crisis averted!

anewadventure · June 2017

@kvacmak excellent!! my son was never a "long" napper until he transitioned to one, then we had at least six months of GLORIOUS three-hour naps. so much productivity time in one chunk!

but. then we gave up the binky. duhnn duhn DUHNNNN. immediately down to 1.5 hours like clockwork. he can't transition himself through as many sleep cycles without it. that was five months ago and it hasn't changed a bit.

STM+ check-in 5/31

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