I want to find my adoptive parents

mommaellie2014 · May 2017

This is going to seem odd but I want to find the people who were going to adopt me. The problem is I don't know very much. I don't even know their names or which agency. I have tried asking my mother but she says she doesn't remember; she might even be hiding the information, who knows. What I do know is that I was six months old and she had planned to meet the couple and the adoption agent at a McDonald's not far from our home in Fort Wayne, IN. She was going to take me there too but changed her mind claiming it was out of love; if you knew her you would understand why I say "claim."

How can I find them or am I just wasting my time?

What I most want to know is if they had ever found the child they wanted after this failed adoption. I also want to know what my life could have been. Sounds pretty silly I know.

Axl2 · May 2017

Maybe try contacting the adoption agency your mother was gonna go through. I wish you best of luck!

britters314 · June 2017

If you don't know their names or the name of the agency, I doubt there is anything you can do. You could maybe hire a PI to find them, but they also wouldn't have much to go on.

SaphireSweetie88 · June 2017

mommaellie2014 said:

This is going to seem odd but I want to find the people who were going to adopt me. The problem is I don't know very much. I don't even know their names or which agency. I have tried asking my mother but she says she doesn't remember; she might even be hiding the information, who knows. What I do know is that I was six months old and she had planned to meet the couple and the adoption agent at a McDonald's not far from our home in Fort Wayne, IN. She was going to take me there too but changed her mind claiming it was out of love; if you knew her you would understand why I say "claim."

How can I find them or am I just wasting my time?

What I most want to know is if they had ever found the child they wanted after this failed adoption. I also want to know what my life could have been. Sounds pretty silly I know.

Unfortunately without their name or the name of the agency your mom was going through I don't think you can find them.

Out of curiosity, IF you were able to find them, what would you want it to accomplish?

peregrinefalconx · June 2017

Obviously you are trying to find these people out of some sort of personal need you have. I would say therapy is the better way to go if you are unhappy about your biological family. It would probably be painful for the people, who thought they had a chance at a baby, to a) hear from you and b) learn that you were unhappy with your upbringing. Would you be happy to know they had found another baby and gave that child the life you think you wanted? Would you want something from them they can't provide to you?

I think support groups and personal support from a professional, rather than fantasizing is probably the healthier and more productive route here. Otherwise, you are just feeding into a fantasy of what your life could have been (which is not accurate, no matter what). Good luck to you and I am sorry you are in this position.

I want to find my adoptive parents

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